Line #367 DeadpanSnarker/Literature


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7	-> '''Daenerys Targaryen:''' Viserys says he could sweep the Seven Kingdoms with ten thousand Dothraki screamers.\
8	'''Ser Jorah Mormont:''' Viserys could not sweep a stable with ten thousand brooms.
9	-->-- ''Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire'', ''Literature/AGameOfThrones''
10
11	{{Deadpan Snarker}}s in {{Literature}}.
12	----
13	* A few have turned up in the ''Literature/SixteenThirtyTwo'' series:
14	** Monsignor Giulio Mazarini, as portrayed in "Between the Armies" from the first ''Ring of Fire'' anthology. Unsurprisingly, as he is a diplomat by trade.
15	** By the time of ''1636: The Saxon Uprising'', Gretchen Richter has developed a wit so dry that, well...
16	--->'''Friedrich Nagel:''' I ... think that was a joke.\
17	'''Eric Krenz:''' With Gretchen, who knows? But we'll take that as our working hypothesis.
18	** ''Kniaz''[[labelnote:*]]"''Kniaz'' is a title. It can be translated into English as anything from a prince to a duke or perhaps a count, if the Englishman is being particularly rude."[[/labelnote]] Vladimir Gorchakov of Muscovy (Russia) from ''1636: The Kremlin Games''.
19	--->'''Vladimir:''' I see a problem. No one is going to be all that surprised that you happened to be visiting your cousin while I came seeing about a loan ... once. But if we keep meeting like this, what will it do to my reputation as a titled nonentity? People might stop talking to me. That would be a disaster for me and inconvenient for you.
20	* The aptly-named bathroom reader ''1,001 Facts That Will Scare the [[SymbolSwearing S#*t]] Out of You'' is a collection of both disturbing statistics and an equal amount of snide remarks commenting on every single one.
21	--> (excerpt from the chapter 'And in My Spare Time, I Enjoy Dying', with boldface and italics as it appears) '''FACT:''' In boxing, a "knockout" is synonymous with cerebral concussion, which can lead to short- or long-term amnesia and confusion. Another concern is that '''the neurological damage is cumulative''' and makes the boxer increasingly vulnerable to future injury and permanent neurological trauma. ''Amnesia might not be a bad thing, in this case. Who wants to remember getting his ass kicked?''
22	* Everything Creator/DouglasAdams writes is bound to have a deadpan snarker in it somewhere, but the most well known are [[Franchise/TheHitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy Marvin and Arthur]]. Actually, apart from being fantastically and intrinsically linked to the events of the Earth blowing up (repeatedly) and wondering where the tea is, that's all Arthur does, although everyone gets in on the act at some point. Even the narrative. Constantly. Then again, it is Douglas Adams.
23	-->'''Richard:''' The teacher usually learns more than the pupils. Isn't that true?\
24	'''Random Professor of Cambridge:''' It would be hard to learn much less than my pupils without undergoing a prefrontal lobotomy.
25	** Marvin in the aforementioned series is an all-time master of this trope. When he isn't bitching and moaning he's doing nothing but making snarky comments.
26	-->'''Marvin:''' ''(grumbling)'' [[IncrediblyLamePun "Give me a hand."]] Ha, ha, stupid human.
27	* ''Literature/TheAliceNetwork'': When Eve is witty, her sense of humor tends toward bitter sarcasm.
28	* In ''Literature/TheAlienSeries'' almost everyone around Kitty is one, especially Christopher.
29	-->'''Christopher''': You're not my type.
30	-->'''Kitty''': I'm sorry.
31	-->'''Christopher''': Don't be. I like 'em stupid.
32	* Marco from ''Literature/{{Animorphs}}''.
33	** Tobias, too. Occasionally even Ax, although it's not always clear whether it's intentional at first, examples in later books ''have'' to be intentional.
34	** Second to last book, after the Yeerks have realized that they're mostly fighting human kids, and not alien warriors.
35	--->'''Random Mook:''' "Andalite!"\
36	'''Ax:''' < Surprise. >
37	** Rachel is pretty sarcastic when the situation calls for it.
38	* Marilla Cuthbert of ''Literature/AnneOfGreenGables'' is an example.
39	** So are Mr. Harrison from ''Anne of Avonlea'' and Cornelia Bryant from ''Anne's House of Dreams''.
40	* The title character of ''Literature/ArtemisFowl.'' For example, after he uses his phone to hack a pretty much un-hackable computer:
41	-->'''Foaly''': Just what else can that phone of yours do?\
42	'''Artemis''': It can play Solitaire and Minesweeper.
43	** Many other characters also fall into this, for example Foaly, Holly, and Mulch (and occasionally Juliet) enjoy trading sarcastic statements. A piece of dialogue that best sums up their characters:
44	-->'''Holly''': Are you suggesting I occasionally ignore the rule book?\
45	'''Foaly''': I am suggesting you do not ''own'' a copy of the rule book, and if you do, you certainly have never opened it.
46	** Mulch [[LampshadeHanging lampshades]] it in the narration of the fifth book:
47	---> Their little band of adventurers needed another smart-ass like they needed ten years of bad luck.
48	* Interestingly used in Joan Hess's ''Literature/ArlyHanks'' mysteries, where Arly makes innumerable sarcastic comments, yet almost no one in the county has enough brains to get the joke. Thus, she mostly has to make do with FirstPersonSmartass monologues except when interrogating out-of-town suspects.
49	* Sun Tzu from ''Literature/{{The Art of War\|SunTzu}}'': "To lift an autumn hair is no sign of great strength; to see sun and moon is no sign of sharp sight; to hear the noise of thunder is no sign of a quick ear."
50	* Sage from the ''Literature/AscendanceSeries''.
51	-->'''Roden''': What are you doing here? When I asked for more soldiers, I didn't intend for you to come.\
52	'''Sage''': Yes, but I was bored.
53	* Most of Creator/JaneAusten's heroines have a streak of this. See [[Literature/{{Emma}} Emma Woodhouse]], [[Literature/SenseAndSensibility Marianne and Elinor Dashwood]], etc. They get it from their author, as we see from Miss Austen's private letters.
54	** ''Literature/PrideAndPrejudice''
55	*** Elizabeth Bennet: "I give you leave to like him. You have liked many a stupider person." She gets it from her [[InTheBlood father]]:
56	---->"An unhappy alternative is before you, Elizabeth. From this day you must be a stranger to one of your parents. Your mother will never see you again if you do ''not'' marry Mr. Collins, and I will never see you again if you ''do''."
57	*** Mr. Darcy is quite the snarker himself. Their mutually snarky banter is the earliest indication that the two of them are better for each other than they realize.
58	* Occasionally the title character of ''Literature/TheBartimaeusTrilogy''; he's more of an Uncontrollably Sneering Snarker, but we love him for it.
59	* ''Literature/BazilBroketail'':
60	** Relkin occasionally does show a dry wit, though he is usually wise enough to keep his personal opinion to himself.
61	-->'''Purple-Green:''' Don't worry. I have a plan.\
62	'''Relkin:''' Oh, that's wonderful. How do you plan to cook it? I heard plans are not very nutritious.
63	** Bazil very much so. Case in point, his comment after learning of the villains' intent to thoroughly search Relkin's mind after the latter has been captured: "That won't take them much time."
64	** Purple-Green. Is he ever.
65	-->'''Vlok:''' Ah, Roquil intends to fertilize the eggs of ancestors.\
66	'''Purple-Green:''' We all know that Vlok would rather eat them.
67	** Or this one:
68	--->'''Gryff:''' Who's talking to you? Not me, that's certain.\
69	'''Purple-Green:''' Well, I'm talking to you and that's all too certain.
70	* In Creator/DavidEddings's ''[[Literature/TheBelgariad Belgariad]]'', it'd almost be easier to list every major character who isn't either a CardCarryingVillain or a DeadpanSnarker. Even the Voice of the Prophecy (the speaking aspect of the cosmic force attempting to restore the universe to its original destiny) snarks it up almost every time it communicates with one of the characters.
71	** The sequel series, "The Mallorean", steers into this even harder - it sidelines most of the less snarky characters from the first series and fills the cast back up with more deadpan snarkers.
72	* Lheorvine Ukris of ''Literature/BlackLegion'' has little of Telemachion's poetry or Khayon's nostalgia, so he makes up for their sulkiness with his snarky attitude. The fact that he has the Nails hammered into his brain, straining his patience, adds to this.
73	* Rayne [=McDonald=], one of the heroes of Marianne Mancusi's ''Blood Coven'' series often dips into this:
74	-->'''Spider:''' ''(re: using a flamethrower-like weapon in a pressurized airplane cabin)'' You thought I'd use it on fire mode? Oh ye of little faith. [[note]]The weapon in question also has a freeze-ray mode.[[/note]]\
75	'''Rayne:''' Oh ''ye'' of little track record.
76	* ''ComicStrip/BigNate''. The most sarcastic character of all time.
77	* Arcturus "Warden" Mesarthim of ''Literature/TheBoneSeason'' books has a dry sense of humour and an impeccable poker face.
78	* ''Literature/BorderKS'' includes a main cast who all get in on the snark at different points.
79	* ''Literature/BoyfriendMaterial'': Deconstructed. Luc is constantly snarking and cracking jokes at the expense of others, especially his fake boyfriend, but this hardly makes him more endearing to the people around him, to whom he just comes off as mean, especially when he accidentally starts needling people or using subjects they are sensitive about, which ends with him just being rude and he later feels bad for being snarky, however, he can't turn it off because it's a defense mechanism.
80	* In the same WorldOfSnark as ''Literature/RangersApprentice,'' this was inevitable of ''Literature/{{Brotherband}}.'' Almost ''every single character'' gets in at least one or two moments of snark, unless they're either [[CanineCompanion Kloof]] or quite minor.
81	* ''Literature/BrothersOfTheSnake'' have Venerable Dreadnaught Autolochus, who makes up for being trapped in a metal box forever with a dry sense of humour.
82	* ''Literature/{{Buddenbrooks}}'': Hanno and Kai, who "nickname" their teachers not "the spider" or "the cockatoo" as their classmates do, but rather "[[SarcasmMode Herr X]]". Also, Hanno's geography teacher, who's a big fan of satirist Heinrich Heine, tries to be this.
83	* ''Literature/CaptivePrince'': The IceQueen Prince Laurent doesn't let his ironclad self-composure get in the way of his barbed sense of humour.
84	%% * Macon Ravenwood from ''Literature/TheCasterChronicles''.
85	* In the Literature/ChaletSchool series, Miss Wilson has a reputation for being very sarcastic with students who get on her bad side. And that includes Joey.
86	* ''Literature/CharlieAndTheChocolateFactory'' has Willy Wonka, who is prone to brushing off the Golden Ticket tour group's constant questions about his crazy world with whimsical and sometimes stealthily insulting asides. When explaining the effects of Hair Toffee to the group, SpoiledBrat Veruca Salt asks "Who wants a beard, for heaven's sake?" "It would suit you very well," Mr. Wonka notes before moving on. Adaptations take this particular character trait and ''run'' with it.
87	* Eustace from ''Literature/TheChroniclesOfNarnia'', with his "habit of being dreadfully matter-of-fact." Edmund too, who after the first book switches from caustic {{Jerkass}} to lovable DeadpanSnarker. Reepicheep fits both in the books:
88	-->'''Caspian:''' There are some things no man can face.\
89	'''Reepicheep:''' It is then my good fortune not to be a man.
90	** In the films (played by Creator/EddieIzzard):
91	-->'''Caspian:''' Y-you are a mouse.\
92	'''Reepicheep:''' I was hoping for something a little more original.
93	** Queen Jadis a.k.a. the White Witch, practically lives for this role (and to turn people to stone).
94	--->''"But what'' are ''you?" said the Queen again. "Are you a great overgrown dwarf who has cut off its beard?"''\
95	''"No, your Majesty," said Edmund, "I never had a beard, I'm a boy."''\
96	''"A boy!" said she. "Do you mean you are a Son of Adam?"''\
97	''Edmund stood still, saying nothing. He was too confused by this time to understand what the question meant.''\
98	''"I see you are an idiot, whatever else you may be," said the Queen.''
99	** Lucy gets in arguably one of the best comeuppances from girl to boy ever:
100	--->''"That's the worst of girls," said Edmund to Peter and the Dwarf. "They never carry a map in their heads."''\
101	''"That's because our heads have something inside them," said Lucy.''
102	* Christopher in ''[[Literature/{{Chrestomanci}} The Lives of Christopher Chant]]'', sometimes more than is good for him.
103	* ''Literature/CiaphasCain'', HERO OF THE IMPERIUM, does this constantly, and often regardless of whether the target is currently attempting to kill him. About the only ones that don't receive this are beings that don't speak, such as Necrons and Tyranids (not that he doesn't try on occasion), and Inquisitors, who are in practice of a far higher rank and rarely tolerate anything resembling amusement (with the exception of Vail, who seems to grow rather fond of verbal matches with him). Vail herself also seems to possess an inclination for this trope, if her [[FootnoteFever footnotes]] are any indication.
104	* Cicero in [[Literature/{{Imperium}} The Cicero Trilogy]] by Creator/RobertHarris is primarily known in-universe for his various witticisms. For example, all most people remember from the time he prosecuted [[CorruptPolitician Gaius Verres]] is that when Hortensius, the defense lawyer, complained that he was speaking in riddles, he fired back since Verres gave Hortensius a sphinx [[RiddlingSphinx (a creature well-known for giving riddles)]] made from ivory, Hortensius should be well-equipped to understand him. His friend Atticus actually criticizes Cicero for his later on, saying that Cicero is too obsessed with snarking at people to actually listen to them, cutting him off from potential leads about political intrigues.
105	* "Literature/ClockpunkAndTheVitalizer" has The Vitalizer, which doesn't seem to deter Dolores's (Clockpunk's) crush on him.
106	* Butcher seems to love snark in general; though there's much less of it than in ''Literature/TheDresdenFiles'', there's still quite a bit of it flying around in the ''Literature/CodexAlera'' series. Most characters get their moment to shine, but the most persistent example is [[CoolOldGuy Doroga]], who spends one memorable scene acting as Master of Arms in a duel and offering both very deadpan editorial commentary on the customs of it, and veiled insults of varying subtlety to one of the challengers, whom he doesn't like very much.
107	* Flora Poste in ''Literature/ColdComfortFarm'' is a borderline snarker, although her good breeding mostly keeps it in check.
108	* Micheal "Mickey" Flynn from Creator/HarryTurtledove's ''[[Literature/{{Worldwar}} Colonization]]'' series seems to get at least one line a section, and often rather more common (half his lines to Johnson on occasion seem to be deadpan snarks), at least in the proximity of Glen Johnson. Runners up are Glen Johnson himself, and Charles Healey. All the Americans get at least one line in, as well as a few of the Lizards (especially Atvar).
109	* The Yankee in Creator/MarkTwain's ''Literature/AConnecticutYankeeInKingArthursCourt'' gets off digs at everyone, but especially the nobility. It usually goes right over their heads.
110	* Every main character in Literature/TheCornersvilleTraceMythos.
111	* Elizabeth Bathory in ''Literature/CountAndCountess''.
112	* ''Literature/ACourtOfThornsAndRoses'': Rhysand has always got a quip up his sleeve.
113	* ''Literature/DaisyMiller'':
114	-->'''Winterbourne:''' If you won't flirt with me, do cease, at least, to flirt with your friend at the piano; they don't understand that sort of thing here. Not in young unmarried women.\
115	'''Daisy:''' It seems to me much more proper in young unmarried women than in old married ones.
116	* [[OfficerAndAGentleman Navis]] from ''Literature/TheDalemarkQuartet''.
117	* ''Literature/DarknessVisible'' takes place in a Victorian WorldOfSnark, so it's hardly surprising that many characters qualify. [[GentlemanSnarker Lewis]] snarks the most, being the narrator, but Marsh, Spangler, [[ServileSnarker George]] and [[ObstructiveBureaucrat Wilson]] get in on the fun:
118	--> '''Lewis:''' ‘Would it help if I wrote you a list?’ I asked sarcastically. ‘The “Ten Commandments of Venturing”, perhaps.'
119	--> '''Marsh''' (on being told Wilson could stop him getting a job in London): ‘There are many other cities in the Empire,’ Marsh replied. ‘And I have never much cared for English weather.’
120	--> '''Spangler:''' ‘Well, well, old boy, you’re alive after all,’ he said, by way of a greeting.
121	--> '''Lewis:''' ‘I know, it’s a terrible disappointment for all concerned.’
122	--> '''Wilson:''' ‘Teaching this lad here?’ Wilson said, turning a critical eye on Marsh, who was as extravagantly attired as ever. His gaze lingered on Marsh’s bandaged right hand. ‘I can see that has been going very well.’
123	* Every other character in the ''Literature/{{Deathstalker}}'' series runs up the snark, and the rest of them are the practice targets.
124	* Alaric Morgan in the ''Literature/{{Deryni}}'' works:
125	** Early in ''Deryni Rising''. Morgan is checking his aide Derry's injury when he is rudely interrupted by a whip-wielding giant-sized Connaiti mercenary announcing "His Loftiness" the Supreme of Howicce. Morgan stops Derry from retaliating (noting the giant was accompanied by six more just like him), but cannot resist indulging his sense of humour. When Derry asks, "By all the devils in hell, what is a Supreme of Howicce?" Morgan replies in a penetrating stage whisper, "I'm not certain. I don't think it's as high as a Quintessence or a Penultimate. Probably some minor ambassador with delusions of his own importance." At a glare from the last of the giant mercenaries, Morgan puts on an innocent expression, but once the party has proceeded down the street, he discreetly uses his powers to entangle the whip-wielder's whip round his horse's legs, bringing down both man and beast and forcing the Connaiti to cut the whip to rescue his horse.
126	** In ''The Bishop's Heir'', Morgan and Kelson are watching a figure that appears to be two people riding a single horse. [[spoiler: It proves to be Dhugal carrying Sidana away from the Mearans in Ratharkin.]] Morgan says, "Aye, and to be riding double at that speed and on a horse that spent, the Devil himself must be chasing them. Care to give the Devil some sport, Sire?"
127	* Florian of ''Literature/TheDinosaurLords'' is the token Snarker of the companions, saying out-loud all the others wouldn't. His main targets are people who are stupid, intolerant and easy to rile up, and he has good time snidely mocking them.
128	* Alan Dean Foster's spinoff ''Literature/{{Dinotopia}}'' novels feature a wisecracking ''Protoceratops'' named Chaz. Bix from the main books also shows hints of this.
129	* In Creator/TerryPratchett's ''Literature/{{Discworld}}'':
130	** Samuel Vimes and Esmerelda Weatherwax. They are both aware of the TheoryOfNarrativeCausality, though with Vimes it's more of an instinctive understanding.
131	** Lord Vetinari's snark is rumored to be so caustic that Sgt. Colon lives in fear of the patrician getting sardonic on him. (Although when it did happen, he never even noticed. Subtle and clever verbal abuse is wasted on some people.)
132	** The LemonyNarrator Terry Pratchett himself.
133	** Rincewind also has his moments; having long given up trying to use his savviness to stay out of dangerous situations, he occasionally uses it to be sarcastic about them.
134	** Every line uttered by Salzalla in ''Literature/{{Maskerade}}'' drips with sarcasm, at least before [[spoiler:he is revealed as the villain, and rapidly loses the plot]]. For instance, suggesting to Mr. Bucket that if the ballerinas did ''more'' leaps, it might save on wear and tear on ballet shoes:
135	--->"Well, their feet wouldn't be on the ground for so long, would they?" said Salzella, in the tones of one who knows for a fact that he's much more intelligent than anyone else in the room.
136	** Pratchett himself can be quite the snarker, such as his response to someone claiming that he had ripped off ''Literature/HarryPotter'' (which came out ''after'' the novel in question):
137	--> "I, of course, used a time machine to 'get the idea' of Unseen University from Hogwarts; I don't know what Paul [Kidby, the illustrator] used in this case. Obviously he must have used something."
138	** Moist von Lipwig, Angua... actually, most of the characters on the [[WorldOfSnark Disc]] are {{Deadpan Snarker}}s.
139	* [[Franchise/BerniceSummerfield Professor Bernice Surprise Summerfield]] in the Franchise/DoctorWhoExpandedUniverse. In ''No Future'', for instance, she dismisses the Vardans based on their only TV appearance.
140	-->'''Benny:''' The Vardans? I think you'll find that your enemies tremble with mirth and cry out things like "Oh good, it's only the Vardans, thank goodness it wasn't somebody serious like the Daleks". You are, after all, the only race in history to be outwitted by the intellectual might of the Sontarans.[[note]]It helps that she's based on Creator/EmmaThompson.[[/note]]
141	* ''Literature/{{Doglands}}'': Pace snarks for his entire [[OneSceneWonder two scenes.]] Dervla has her moments, Skyver being her favorite target.
142	--> '''Pace''': I assumed that you lacked the intelligence to do what I told you, so I thought I'd better come along and help you out.
143	* ''Literature/DonQuixote'': [[DeconstructedTrope Deconstructed]] by Sancho Panza; what happens in RealLife to those who cannot say anything without being sarcastic? Why, Sancho is beaten by Don Quixote and a lot of other people. The problem is that a lot of people enjoy Sancho's sarcasm (he is good at it) and so he feels compelled to say it, even when he is in perilous situations, like when he denied payment to a Innkeeper (Chapter XVII part I), and he mocked the entire people of the Braying Town or the highwaymen of Barcelona (Chapters XXVII and LX of the part II) The first give him a beating, the highwaymen almost kill him:
144	-->''Upon this Sancho remarked, "From what I have seen here, justice is such a good thing that there is no doing without it, even among the thieves themselves."''\
145	''One of the squires heard this, and raising the butt-end of his harquebuss would no doubt have broken Sancho's head with it had not Roque Guinart called out to him to hold his hand. Sancho was frightened out of his wits, and vowed not to open his lips so long as he was in the company of these people.''
146	** Andres (the flooged boy) [[WhatTheHellHero snarking about Don Quixote's]] [[ComplainingAboutRescuesTheyDontLike rescue]] is the first clue the reader has that he was an AssholeVictim all the time. And the only murder that is explicitly shown in this novel is the [[TooDumbToLive bandit who dared to snark to his leader]].
147	--> One of the squires observed in his mixture of Gascon and Catalan, [[GentlemanThief "This captain of ours would make a better friar than highwayman]]; [[JustLikeRobinHood if he wants to be so generous another time, let it be with his own property and not ours.]]"\
148	The unlucky wight did not speak so low but that Roque overheard him, and drawing his sword almost split his head in two, saying, "That is the way I punish impudent saucy fellows." They were all taken aback, and not one of them dared to utter a word, such deference did they pay him.
149	* ''Everyone'' in the ''{{Literature/Doom}}'' novels. If sarcasm and smart-ass could kill monsters the invasion never would have progressed past Phobos.
150	* Steven Brust's ''Literature/{{Dragaera}}'' series:
151	** Vlad, Kragar, and Loiosh from the Taltos novels.
152	** Pel in the ''Literature/KhaavrenRomances''.
153	* Vern, the dragon protagonist and narrator of Karina Fabian's "Dragon Eye, P.I." books, seems to be made of fire and snark.
154	* Orson Gregory in ''Literature/TheDreamsideRoad'' constantly fluctuates between deadpan snark and hamminess. He employs both to aid in his mid-battle psychological warfare and is at his snarkiest when in danger.
155	* Most characters in Jim Butcher's ''Literature/TheDresdenFiles'' do this at least occasionally. Michael (usually the Straight Man to Harry's Wise Guy) and Mab are probably the only two recurring characters who do not regularly indulge (even Nicodemus has his moments) -- and even Michael occasionally gets the occasional, very sly line, which usually takes Harry a couple of minutes to register, because he's not expecting it. Harry himself is such a memetic snarker that when he automatically mouths off to ''Odin's'' secretaries, he claims that to not insult them to would be to impugn their reputation of incomprehensible badassery, because it's well known that Harry makes fun of ''everyone''.
156	--> '''Person:''' "Who the hell are you?"
157	--> '''Harry''' "I the hell am Harry."
158	--> '''Person:''' "Are you always a wise-ass?"
159	--> '''Harry''' "No. Sometimes I'm asleep."
160	** Bob and Thomas both seem to rather enjoy the snark. Considering that Bob's personality is explicitly modelled on that of his owner when they picked him up (which, since Dresden picked him up when he was 16, explains his libido as well), and that Thomas [[spoiler: is Harry's older half-brother]], this is not exactly surprising.
161	** Murphy and Molly are just as snarky as Harry, with Murphy being especially good at the deadpan.
162	** It's also revealed that Margaret Dresden, Harry's mother [[spoiler: (and Thomas')]], was just as snarky as he is, with Lord Raith at one point muttering that Harry is every bit as impudent as she was.
163	** The first time we hear [[spoiler:Mouse]] talk, it turns out [[SugarWiki/FunnyMoments he sounds exactly like Harry]].
164	-->"I'll tear off your ass. Literally, your ''actual ass''."
165	* Literature/ElsabethSoesten and Brother Hieronymus of ''No Good Deed...'' are both quick with a smart remark with one another. However while Hieronymus is generally more diplomatic with others, Elsabeth snarks at pretty much ''everyone''. Even church officials, much to Hieronymus's horror.
166	* Danjel in Vilhelm Moberg's ''Literature/TheEmigrants'' suite manages to be a deadpan snarker and the meekest man around at the same time.
167	-->'''The Vicar''': No one is allowed to give communion unless they are ordained.
168	-->'''Danjel''': As far as I know, nowhere in the Bible does it say that Our Lord Jesus was ordained.
169	* ''Literature/EmpireOfTheVampire'': Plenty of characters fall under this trope. Gabriel himself is quite partial to biting sarcasm, particularly when conversing with his jailer Jean-Francois, who gives as good as he gets. Every other word from Astrid Rennier's mouth is some witty jab, quip or insult. But Ashdrinker, Gabriel's EmpathicWeapon, quite possibly takes the cake with her mix of YeOldeButcheredeEnglishe and sudden, vicious bouts of barbed tonguelashing.
170	* One of the more intelligible anecdotes in ''English As She is Spoke: A Jest in Sober Earnest'' has an example:
171	* ''Literature/{{Endling}}'':
172	** Byx can be this at times, particularly when talking to Tobble. (Byx's species eats his)
173	--->'''Tobble:''' (Climbing onto Byx's back) I hope you don't mind.\
174	'''Byx:''' That there's a furry meal hugging my neck? As it happens, I do mind.
175	** Then there's Khara.
176	--->'''Renzo:''' You know, it seems we've yet to enjoy breakfast, Dog and I.\
177	'''Khara:''' Pity. It seems you won't be enjoying it with us.
178	** Renzo is also one.
179	--->'''Tobble:''' It's the horse thief!\
180	'''Renzo:''' (the thief) Delighted to see you again.
181	-->''A duchess accused of magic being interrogated for a commissary extremely unhandsome, this was beg him selve one she had look the devil. "Yes, sir, I did see him, was answer the duchess, and he was like you as two water's drops."''
182	* Chrisjen Avasarala from ''Literature/TheExpanse'' refuses to speak in anything but sarcastic, cynical, whithering diatribe. One character who is plotting behind her back becomes concerned she's onto him because he has a conversation with her and she doesn't say anything insulting or sarcastic.
183	--> "Try not to put your dick in this, it's fucked enough already."
184	%%* ''Literature/FelixCastor'' -- Felix ''lives'' this trope.
185	%%* The protagonist of ''Literature/FifthBusiness'' is one.
186	* Trish in ''Literature/FindingGaia'' fits this description well -- she even has a real-world blog named "ecosnark."
187	%%* Several characters in ''Literature/TheFirstLaw'', but ''especially'' Glokta. Then again, [[BeingTorturedMakesYouEvil he has some good reasons for it.]]
188	* Rutti in Redfern Jon Barrett's ''Literature/TheGiddyDeathOfTheGaysAndTheStrangeDemiseOfStraights'' fits the trope. His dry and often cruel sense of humor being fueled by his hatred of the conservative, homophobic city around him.
189	* In ''Flour Babies'', the teacher gets his moments. When reviewing his students' journal entries, he notes that one of them numbered his sentences, so as to avoid making the mistake of going over the three-sentence minimum.
190	* Diana, in the ''Literature/{{Gone}}'' series.
191	--> "Oh, look: Drake's trying to think."
192	%%** Howard also has this trope down.
193	%%* Rhett Butler from ''Literature/GoneWithTheWind''.
194	* Morton from ''Don't tell Mummy'' in the ''Literature/GraveyardSchool'' series: an enigmatic girl with a strange accent and a sarcastic sense of humor who constantly annoys Park with her snarks (he calls it "fifth grade humor"). [[spoiler: When she turns out to be a living mummy, he realizes that it's "not fifth grade humor", but "bazillion-year-old mummy humor".]]
195	* Both of ''Literature/TheHardyBoys'' can be this (even when [[DangerDeadpan at the villain's mercy]]); however, while Frank definitely does have many good lines of snark, Joe is the one who is especially known for this. Just about every sentence out of his mouth when talking to the bad guys will be some of this. Both brothers are acknowledged for this in-universe, with their allies and enemies alike [[LampshadeHanging lampshading]] it.
196	%%* Harriet from Louise Fitzhugh's ''Literature/HarrietTheSpy'', and also her friend Janie.
197	%%* Tadhg in ''Literature/AHarvestOfWar'', especially at his showboating daughter.
198	* Both Machen and the Hermit in ''Literature/{{Hieroglyphics}}''.
199	* {{Deconstructed}} in Creator/SaulBellow's ''Literature/HimWithHisFootInHisMouth'', where the narrator is, in essence, a deadpan-snark addict. He couldn't resist any opening for snide remarks and would feel guilty after the damage is done, at times with sincere apologies. The number of faux pas he committed is enormous and that eventually contributed to ruining his life.
200	* There [[WorldOfSnark literally is no character]] in the ''Literature/HIVESeries'' who appears more than once and does NOT have this trait. Every. Single. One. The only characters who don't, Block and Tackle, give an honest effort and come up with comments that are only moderately witty, to highlight their stupidity.
201	* Quite a few in the Literature/HonorHarrington novels. Probably the most notable is Michael Oversteegen, who snarks at ''everything''. When he is angry enough for SarcasmFailure, though, whoever is on the receiving end of his anger is in for a ''very'' bad day. Another famous example is Honor's best friend, Michelle Henke, especially when she [[spoiler:met Eloise Prichart for the first time after getting captured]] in At All Costs/Storm from the Shadows.
202	* While the ''Literature/HorusHeresy'' books tend to be dark, there are still a few of these -- especially in the early stages, before hell quite literally breaks loose. They're particularly common among the Sons of Horus -- Tarik Torgaddon would be a hugely valuable battlefield resource if snarky commentary could be used as bolter ammunition, and while Loken is more serious, he does pick things up quickly.
203	-->'''Abaddon:''' Do this right, Garviel.\
204	'''Loken:''' I'm glad you told me that, I'd been considering making a mess of it.
205	%% * Aphrodite and Rephaim from ''Literature/TheHouseOfNight''.
206	* ''Literature/HowToSurviveAZombieApocalypse'' has a main cast full of them, presumably because there is a reason to be snarky most of the time as everything going on is so [[GagSeries utterly ridiculous]]. OnlySaneMan Butch takes the trophy, with the pseudo-[[TsunDere tsundere]] protagonist as a runner up.
207	-->'''April:''' If you join us, we'll promote you for USA president!\
208	'''Duff:''' Really?\
209	'''April:''' Yes!\
210	'''Duff:''' No.
211	* ''Literature/TheHungerGames'':
212	** Katniss herself, massively so; as the narrator of the books, this also makes her a FirstPersonSmartass.
213	** Haymitch Abernathy is one of the biggest deadpan snarkers in the novel alongside Johanna; they seem almost incapable of interacting with others without snarking at them, and Peeta gets plenty of this as well. This leads to plenty of SnarkToSnarkCombat when they and Katniss interact with each other.
214	** Just about all of Dean Highbottom's interactions with Lucky Flickerman; he is clearly not having it.
215	* Ironically, the Snark itself from ''Literature/TheHuntingOfTheSnark'' is [[InvertedTrope not a snarker at all]], as it has NoSenseOfHumor, which is why this sort of thing can be used to distract it:
216	-->The third is its slowness in taking a jest.
217	-->Should you happen to venture on one,
218	-->It will sigh like a thing that is deeply distressed:
219	-->And it always looks grave at a pun.
220	* ''Literature/IClaudius'' has some. The Emperor Tiberius, for example:
221	** When a delegation from Troy offers condolences on the death of his son Tiberius offers condolences on the death of [[Literature/TheIliad the death of Hector.]]
222	* In the ''Literature/ImperialRadch'' series, Breq, Medic, and especially ''Gem of Sphene'' can all snark with the best.
223	-->'''Medic:''' You call that rest, do you?\
224	'''Breq:''' Up until the bomb went off, yes.
225	* ''Literature/InDeath'' series: Eve Dallas is so very much this.
226	** As is her aide/partner Peabody
227	-->'''Dallas''': Was that sarcasm?
228	-->'''Peabody (considers)''': No, it was too direct for sarcasm.
229	** Actually, just about every named regular character, sooner or later.
230	* ''Literature/TheInfernalDevices''.
231	** Oh, ''Will.''
232	--> '''Gabriel''': You know, there was a time when I thought we could be friends.
233	--> '''Will''': There was a time when I thought I was a ferret, but that turned out to be the [[OpiumDen opium haze]]. Did you know it had that effect? 'Cause I didn't.
234	** And there's this scene from ''The Clockwork Prince'':
235	--> “They’re not hideous,” said Tessa.
236	--> Will blinked at her. “What?”
237	--> “Gideon and Gabriel,” said Tessa. “They’re really quite good-looking, not hideous at all.”
238	--> “I spoke,” said Will, in sepulchral tones, “of the pitch-black inner depths of their souls.”
239	--> Tessa snorted. “And what color do you suppose the inner depths of your soul are, Will Herondale?”
240	--> “Mauve,” said Will.
241	%% ** Tessa
242	** Jem's snarkiness comes mostly from saying something, then adding "Not really" with something humorous. He can play the trope completely straight, though.
243	%% ** Jessamine.
244	%% ** Sophie, oh, so much.
245	%% ** Cecily. Just like her brother.
246	%% ** Gideon.
247	%%* Dame Agnes Kerr from Rumer Godden's ''Literature/InThisHouseoOfBrede.''
248	* [[Literature/JeevesAndWooster Jeeves]], the valet from Creator/PGWodehouse's novels, was famous for his incredibly diplomatic portrayals of this trope:
249	-->''(when trying to convince his employer, Bertie, not to wear a specific dinner jacket)''\
250	'''Bertie:''' But all the lads have asked for the name of my tailor.\
251	'''Jeeves:''' Doubtless with the aim of avoiding him, sir.\
252	'''Bertie:''' He's considered one of the best men in England!\
253	'''Jeeves:''' I do not make any judgments regarding his moral character, sir.
254	** The Creator/PGWodehouse 'verse is such a WorldOfSnark in general that even ''[[Literature/JeevesAndWooster Bertie]]'' gets his fair share of snarky comments. Most of them are in the narrative, but when Bingo Little leads him on an [[ShortcutsMakeLongDelays overly-long shortcut]] through the countryside to meet [[SerialRomeo his latest love interest]]:
255	--->'' 'Of course,' I said, 'that's enough excitement for anyone, and undoubtedly a corking reward for tramping three miles out of one's way over ploughed fields with tight boots, but don't we do anything else? ...' ''
256	* ''Literature/KindlingAshes'': Frang delights in filling Corran's head with sarcasm, insults, and other things designed to annoy him.
257	* ''Literature/TheKingdomAndTheCrown'' has several snarkers, notably Yehuda, who has it come out frequently in regards to his best friend and fellow Zealot Simeon, as well as when he speaks his mind on the Pharisees.
258	* Mr. Skree in ''Literature/TheKingdomsOfEvil''.
259	* ''Literature/TheKingkillerChronicle'' has Kvothe, the most gifted student in the Academy, Ruh performer, who knows the Name of the Wind and of Felurian, his mind like a blade of Ramston Steel, and his tongue to match.
260	* Fisk from the ''Literature/KnightAndRogueSeries''. Usually in response to Michael.
261	* Barquiel L'Envers, of Jacqueline Carey's ''Literature/KushielsLegacy'' series. He has many snarky lines throughout the series, but the best has to be this one:
262	-->''"Didn't you enjoy my largesse in the Khalif's court? I heard I sent you to Khebbel-im-Akkad after paying you to betray your master."''
263	* Levi, AKA Biff, from ''Literature/LambTheGospelAccordingToBiff'' is snarky enough to have invented the word Sarcasm.
264	* Liz Pennykettle from ''Literature/TheLastDragonChronicles''. "Quelle surprise."
265	%%** Zanna Martindale as well.
266	%%** Ditto Grella.
267	* ''Literature/LightAndDarkTheAwakeningOfTheMageKnight'': Elfin culture is based on being straight forward, to the point, and concise. It's very easy for them to sound like this to others and therefore give offense without meaning to.
268	* ''Literature/TheLongingOfShiinaRyo'': Kouma Yon.
269	* Many characters from ''Literature/TheLordOfTheRings'' fall into this trope occasionally. Gandalf, though, is especially snarky.
270	-->'''Bilbo:''' I'm so very hungry.\
271	'''Gandalf:''' Can't help that, unless you'd like to walk back and ask the goblins ''nicely'' to give you back your pony and luggage.\
272	'''Bilbo:''' No thank you![[note]]From ''Literature/TheHobbit''[[/note]]\
273	\
274	'''Pippin''': There must be someone with intelligence in the party.\
275	'''Gandalf''': Then you certainly will not be chosen, Peregrin Took!\
276	\
277	'''Gandalf''': ''(after Bilbo pulls his disappearing stunt at the birthday party)'' I'm glad to find you visible.\
278	\
279	'''Gandalf''': ''(meeting the bristling three walkers, who have mistaken him for Saruman)'' Well met indeed, my friends. I wish to speak with you. Will you come down, or shall I come up? ''(shortly later, after disarming them with barely a thought)'' Well met, I say again!\
280	\
281	'''Gandalf''': ''(after meeting Sauruman the Many-Colored)'' "I liked white better."
282	** It's stated that Bilbo mostly wills his possessions to the people who would want or need them, but for a few relatives, Bilbo goes full-on DeadpanSnarker:
283	*** His cousin who borrows books and never returns them, is given a large (empty) bookcase.
284	*** The relative who never answers letters gets an elaborate gold pen and inkwell.
285	*** To a chronic borrower, an umbrella ''for his very own''.
286	*** Another relative who imagines herself the Shire's equivalent of ''Dear Abby'' is given a wastebasket.
287	*** A young cousin with a vanity problem is given a concave mirror.
288	*** Cousin Lobelia, who appropriated his silverware after his first disappearance (although that was never proved) gets a case of silver spoons "as a present." "They took the point, but she also took the spoons."
289	* Would you believe Creator/HPLovecraft? From ''Literature/TheDunwichHorror'': "But then, the homes and sheds of Dunwich's folk have never been remarkable for [[SesquipedalianLoquaciousness olfactory immaculateness]]."
290	** One time a student of Lovecraft's mistook the common notation ''Ibid'' for the name of some ancient Roman fellow -- which to be fair it does sound like. Lovecraft loved that so much that he wrote a story called "Ibid" about such a fellow in mockery. What kind of humour would you expect from a guy who thought that the universe was a harsh, hostile place?
291	* In ''Literature/LoyalEnemies'', Shelena seems physically unable not to snark.
292	-->''([[TheKlutz Rest]] claims that he left the tailors' guild by himself)''
293	-->'''Shelena:''' Of course, who'd doubt that.
294	-->'''Rest:''' If so, stop grinning like that!
295	-->'''Shelena:''' Ah, come on. I just envy the people who managed to get rid of you so easily.\
296	\
297	'''Veres:''' Shelena, I'm telling you for the tenth time...
298	-->'''Shelena:''' You'd better think for the first.
299	** Her internal monologue is full of that:
300	--> ''He might be really good battle wizard in the future. After all, he was already quite good at running away from the monster looking as if he was gracing it by it.''
301	** Veres has his moments as well.
302	-->''(After Shelena stomps on [[OurDragonsAreDifferent Darkness]]' tail, causing their task to be done with much ensuing hilarity)''
303	-->'''Veres:''' Indeed, you're just plain ''born'' to work together.
304	* In ''Literature/TheMachineriesOfEmpire'', he unnamed Nirai who keeps an eye on Jedao and helps Keris get used to the new presence in her brain snarks at the undead general every time he opens his mouth.
305	* ''Literature/MalazanBookOfTheFallen'':
306	** Udinaas, Samar Dev, Bugg and Fiddler are all snarkers to some degree.
307	** When Draconus has reason to show humor in ''Literature/MalazanBookOfTheFallen'', he does. Especially in his interactions with Ublala Pung.
308	-->'''Ublala:''' I've met gods before. They collect chickens.
309	-->'''Draconus:''' We possess mysterious ways indeed.
310	* ''Literature/TheMarkOfTheDragonfly'': Piper tends to make snarky comments, even with people she likes.
311	->'''Piper''': Oh, well, that's fine. For a minute there, I was worried, but now that I know you had some pebbles to protect you from the ''deadly meteors raining from the heavens'', I won't think any more about it.
312	* ''Literature/MartinFierro'': The protagonist is a Gaucho that has a lot of “picardía criolla” (gauchesque mischief) that is very funny… at least for the people that is not directed at. Fierro deconstructs this trope because people consider him a Jerkass and attempt to OffingTheMouth with him.
313	** Fierro describes an Englishman as from “Inca-la perra” that could be translated like “a dog rider”, demeaning the Englishman, who was someone who found a job digging trenches instead of doing something like riding a horse, only work worthy of a Gaucho.
314	** Fierro describes another immigrant as a “Pa-po-litano”, meaning a Napolitan… but “Papo” means “pussy” in Argentinian [[JiveTurkey “lunfardo”]], so it’s an insult.
315	%% * ''[[Literature/TheMazeRunner The Maze Runner Trilogy]]'':
316	%% ** Minho.
317	%% ** While not as immediately noticable, Newt also goes into SarcasmMode plenty of times.
318	%% ** And Thomas picks it up from them.
319	* In the older ''Literature/MaxAndRuby'' books by Creator/RosemaryWells, Ruby was more of a DeadpanSnarker and sometimes strict with her brother Max. Which can be seen in "Max's Chocolate Chicken" and "Max's Christmas". She even said to Max "Max, you'd have trouble finding your own ears if they weren't attached to your head." in Max's Chocolate Chicken since Max didn't gather eggs and was busy gathering acorns and making an Acorn Pancake. This was also present in the AnimatedAdaptation for [[http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x1m050e_max-s-chocolate-chicken_shortfilms "Max's Chocolate Chicken"]] and [[http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x1m050e_max-s-chocolate-chicken_shortfilms "Max's Christmas"]] which was released on VHS in the early 90's. Ruby became more nicer and kind around Max in later books of the series.
320	* ''[[WorldOfSnark Everyone]]'' in the ''Literature/MediochreQSethSeries'', including the ''[[LemonyNarrator narrative]]''. Mediochre himself manages to stand out even then, as does his sidekick and frequent [[SnarkToSnarkCombat snarking partner]] Charlotte. The award for most beautifully deadpan line in the series, however, goes to the presumably-magic automated voice at the entrance to the [=MABGov=] meeting chamber.
321	--> '''Automated Voice:''' Please state name now, Sir, Madam or Other.\
322	'''Mediochre:''' Dr Mediochre Quirinius Seth.\
323	'''Automated Voice:''' Name not recognised. Please amend and state again.\
324	'''Mediochre:''' [SIGH]. [[OverlyLongName Professor Doctor Laird Sir Mediochre Quirinius Seth]], [[TryToFitThatOnABusinessCard PhD MusD MSc CBE OBE MIMC VC-Bar]], and I also have a [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking Grade 8 in piano]] if you want to know.\
325	'''Automated Voice:''' Go right in, Sir. Congratulations on your musical ability.
326	* ''Literature/TheMortalInstruments'':
327	** Jace Wayland.
328	** Clary Fray drifts into this sometimes.
329	** Simon is one of the snarkiest in the books. And that's saying something.
330	** Valentine Morgenstern.
331	** Magnus too. [[WorldOfSnark Pretty much every character has their moments.]]
332	** Special mention goes to Alec. He somehow manages to snark despite [[DoesNotUnderstandSarcasm not understanding sarcasm.]]
333	* Rex Stout's Literature/NeroWolfe series has plenty, but Archie Goodwin, Nero Wolfe's legman, is a champion.
334	-->'''Quayle'''(upon ejection from Wolfe's office by Archie): You goddamn goon.\
335	'''Archie''': That's Goodwin. You left out the D,W,I, but I'll overlook it.
336	* ''Literature/{{Nightrunner}}'' is FULL of this, especially when Seregil is around. And put him and Thero into one room...
337	--> Seregil: (''in otter form, throwing a fish at Thero's feet'') A cold fish for a cold fish!\
338	Thero: He never can go anywhere without stealing something.
339	** After his first transformation into an otter in front of Alec (who is a pelt hunter) he replies to the latter's praise:
340	-->In light of your former profession, I'm not certain if this was a compliment or an appraisal of the worth of my pelt.
341	** After his uncle remarks that Seregil is the living image of his late mother, Seregil retorts: "Just what a man wants to hear."
342	** Let's just say, Lynn Flewelling herself is a great snarker. And loves it.
343	* Tybalt, King of the Cats is practically unable to be anything but this around ''Literature/OctoberDaye''.
344	* Mogget, the cat-formed servant of the Abhorsens in Creator/GarthNix's ''Literature/OldKingdom'' series practically personifies this trope. The Disreputable Dog has her moments too.
345	* A common way of coping with the hell of war in ''Literature/OldMansWar''. The protagonist, John Perry, is like this even before military service.
346	* While in the main ''Literature/{{Outlander}}'' series, Lord John Gray is an example of the OfficerAndAGentleman played relatively straight, he displays some definite tendencies towards being a deadpan snarker. (Well, when he's not mooning after Jamie.) Again, to some degree in his own series as well.
347	* Blake Thorburn, from ''Literature/{{Pact}}'', ''would'' be one, but magicians in the Pact setting aren't allowed to lie and, as it quickly becomes apparent, deliberate sardonic irony conveighed through the contrast between word meaning and tone definitely counts, so he has to keep his snark mental. He's ''very'' bitter about this, since snark is a much-loved family trait.
348	-->'''Blake''': Thank you for the commentary. I’d say it was doing lots for my morale, but I’m not allowed to be sarcastic anymore.
349	* In the ''Paranormal Curio'' series this comes up a lot, from people who are trying to cope with a community full of crackpot supernatural enthusiasts.
350	** In ''Literature/TheAffix'' Matt is a ''vicious'' snarker, and it only gets worse as the probability distortions thrown off by the [[MineralMacGuffin gem]] cause him to [[SanitySlippage slip a few gears]] himself. He has plenty of practice from dealing with his awful stalker ex-girlfriend, who's caught up in it too.
351	---> '''[[ClingyJealousGirl Liz]]:''' Sometimes you're a real piece of shit.
352	---> '''Matt:''' I know, Liz. But someday you'll find yourself the right guy, who's ''always'' a piece of shit.
353	** Jasmine showed signs of this in the first book too, especially when dealing with Matt, but in ''Literature/TheWellOfMoments'' she loves to use it on some of her competitors (and an assassin) when being dismissive.
354	* Gail Carriger's [[Literature/TheParasolProtectorate Parasol Protectorate]] series has quite a few of these. Professor Lyall is a big one though. He has to be, being Lord Maccon's beta.
355	* Everyone in ''Literature/PercyJacksonAndTheOlympians''. (Even the ''chapter titles'' are snarked.)
356	-->'''Ethan:''' My mother promised me glory. An eye was a small price to pay.\
357	'''Percy:''' Great mom.
358	* Richard Cole from ''Literature/ThePowerOfFive''.
359	* Kata in ''Literature/ProjectTau'' does this a lot, usually to Dennison or Tau.
360	* The online textbook [[https://www.eng.fsu.edu/~dommelen/quantum/style_a/index.html Quantum Mechanics for Engineers]] by Leo van Dommelen has a lot of snark in places, especially whenever the author points out yet another physical concept with a NonIndicativeName (which occurs, on average, several times in every chapter).
361	* Creator/AynRand. Get this burn [[GentlemanSnarker Francisco d'Anconia]] lays on [[ObstructiveBureaucrat Jim Taggart]] in ''Literature/AtlasShrugged'':
362	-->'''D'Anconia''': It is unwise Jim, to venture unsolicited opinions. You may wish to spare yourself the embarrassing revelation of their exact value to the listener.
363	** And the smackdown Hank Rearden gives to his assistant:
364	-->'''Rearden''': Run along, Non-Absolute. Try and pour a ton of molten steel on the expediency of the moment.
365	** [[ActionGirl Dagny]] is quite the snarker.
366	-->'''Dagny''': I crashed the gate. Literally.
367	** Ayn herself: "If you don't understand my books, you sure as Hell won't understand my voice."
368	* Halt from ''Literature/RangersApprentice'' is a DeadpanSnarker -- if he's suddenly serious, you ''know'' [[OOCIsSeriousBusiness something's very, very wrong.]] Gilan, Will, and Horace, his formal and informal apprentices, have all picked up the trait from him (though Will showed traces of even before he met Halt, and there is plenty of SnarkToSnarkCombat shared between Halt, [[{{Ambadassador}} Pauline]], and [[VitriolicBestBuds Crowley]].
369	* The title character in ''Literature/RatmansNotebooks'' (the source material for the ''Willard'' movies). He's so good at it that he often comes across as a satirist or an observational comedian rather than the Ed Gein-inspired criminal he is.
370	* Taken to near epic-levels by the cast of the ''Literature/RedRoom'' series. It seems being a magical secret agent turns you into a smartass.
371	* Keith Laumer's Literature/{{Retief}} often displays a casual snarkiness regarding the rest of the CDT and how the organization is run. He often exploits his superiors' disdain for this in order to get sent into the thick of things as a punishment. Many of the aliens or human natives encountered also get in on the act.
372	* ''Literature/TheReynardCycle'': Reynard snarks so much that he engages in WittyBanter even when he is fighting for his life. It generally annoys the heck out of his enemies. When he stops doing this it's usually a very bad sign.
373	* The eponymous Rosie in ''Literature/TheRosieProject'' qualifies, further emphasizing her difference from the protagonist Don Tillman.
374	* ''Every single character'' in ''Literature/TheSupervillainySaga'' is a smart ass. The only exception is the Superman {{EXPY}} Ultragod who seems like the lone bastion of politeness in an otherwise CrapsackWorld. It seems being a smartass inherently comes with superpowers.
375	* Also many characters by Creator/{{Saki}}, both men and women (and the occasional cat).
376	* Simon Templar, ''Literature/TheSaint'', tends toward the more whimsical side of the trope but is still prone to sarcastic wit, particularly when it comes to taunting the bad guys and/or the police. [[LemonyNarrator The narration]] also tends to get involved.
377	-->''The Law, in the Saint’s opinion, was a stodgy and elephantine institution which was chiefly justified in its existence by the pleasantly musical explosive noises which it made when he broke it.''
378	* Mark, the narrator/[=PoV=] character in ''Literature/SandpaperKiss'', both in his narration and in his actual dialogue.
379	* In the Czech Jeeves-inspired ''Literature/{{Saturnin}}'', this kind of humour is naturally also present. The greatest perpetrator is probably Doctor Vlach (although his snark is often too longwinded to be truly deadpan), but the other characters also get their share, including the Narrator in his narrative:
380	-->''When I once asked him what should a sane person think of the event described in the newspaper cutting, he said it was hard to judge because these days no one was sane anymore. ... Doctor Vlach spoke for five more quarters of an hour, and I no longer remember exactly what about. He ended by expressing an admiration for Pythagoras. I did not argue this belief with him, but regarding his claim that no one is sane anymore, I think Doctor Vlach should only speak for himself.''
381	* ''Literature/ScarlettUndercover'': Many of the characters qualify, but Scarlett is the most prominent example.
382	->"Where were you Friday?" she asked.
383	->"[[BlatantLies Rescuing a kitten from a tree.]]"
384	->That bought me a look, and not a nice one.
385	** Mook snarks about Scarlett's tendency to do this.
386	-->'''Mook''': Did that hurt?
387	-->'''Scarlett''': Did what hurt?
388	-->'''Mook''': Not saying whatever it was you wanted to?
389	-->'''Scarlett''': Like you don't even know.
390	** Nuala also has this trait.
391	-->'''Manny''': As the legends say, [the ring] was a powerful seal that gave Solomon dominion over weather and beasts. Humankind and jinnkind, as well.
392	-->'''Nuala''': What about his seven hundred wives and three hundred concubines? What effect did the ring have on them?
393	* ''Literature/ShamanOfTheUndead'' has some starling examples, like annoying aunt Tekla, whose [[DeadAllAlong deadness]] doesn't stop her from berating Ida in creative ways when the girl doesn't want to do something. Other is Redhead, who constantly teases Ida and Brittle, who learn to answer in kind out of sheer self-defense.
394	* Franchise/SherlockHolmes
395	** Sherlock Holmes ''is'' this trope!
396	--->'''Athelney Jones:''' ''(talking about a LockedRoomMystery)'' What do you think of this, Holmes? Sholto was, on his own confession, with his brother last night. The brother died in a fit, on which Sholto walked off with the treasure? How's that?\
397	'''Sherlock Holmes:''' On which the dead man very considerately got up and locked the door on the inside.
398	** Watson has had his own fair share of snarks, to the point that Holmes does comment on his "pawky humour."
399	** And his non-canonical protégée and later wife, Mary Russell, in the ''Literature/MaryRussell'' books is just as deadpan a snarker as Holmes.
400	* ''Literature/SisterhoodSeries'' by Creator/FernMichaels: Jack Emery can do this like nobody else can. More than one character calls him a wiseass.
401	* In ''Literature/SmallerAndSmallerCircles'', Father Saenz and Father Jerome often snark in each other's company. Joanna, a reporter hot on their heels, is also a serial offender.
402	* Asher from ''Literature/SomeoneElsesWar'' is spectacular at this.
403	* From George R. R. Martin's ''Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire''. The [[WorldOfSnark number of snarkers is almost as over the top as the number of overall characters]] in the series is. However, flip a coin at House Lannister's table, and you're almost ''guaranteed'' to hit a snarker of some description either directly or by ricochet -- and, each of the habitual snarkers can pull the deadpan out when they feel the need to.
404	** The series also deconstructs the snarker character very often by having their mouth get them into trouble. [[spoiler:Like Jaime, who insists on being a gigantic smartass to the man keeping him prisoner and loses his sword-hand for his trouble.]]
405	* Rothbart's usual manner of speech in ''Literature/TheSorcerersDaughter''.
406	-->'''Siegfried''': If Odile gets stricken [[spoiler:by plague]], let it strike me too! I could be...
407	-->'''Rothbart''': Why do you need [[spoiler:the plague]] as well, when you're stricken by such bottomless stupidity, my friend?
408	* In Erin Bow's novel ''Sorrow's Knot'', Kestrel is this.
409	* Melinda, the main character of Laurie Halse Anderson's ''Literature/{{Speak}}'', is deadpan in all aspects of life. Considering she [[spoiler:was raped at an end-of-summer party at the age of fourteen]], it's understandable. This doesn't stop her from being one of Anderson's most hilarious and likable characters.
410	* Gerald Morris's ''Literature/TheSquiresTales'' turns many of Myth/KingArthur's knights into this. Particularly Gawain and Gaheris, Rhience, and Arthur himself when he allows himself.
411	* Jay, in the book series ''Literature/Spaceforce2012''.
412	* Lizzie's character in ''Literature/SpiderCircus'' is very much this, especially when talking to Jack.
413	* This exchange in ''Literature/StarCarrier: Earth Strike'' between [[FrontlineGeneral Rear Admiral Alexander Koenig]] and his flag captain Randolph Buchanan:
414	-->'''Koenig:''' I don't believe in [[TheEmpire "galactic empires"]]. (''snorts'') The whole idea is silly, given [[SpaceIsBig the size of the galaxy]].\
415	'''Buchanan:''' Well, the [[BigBad Sh'daar]] appear to believe in the concept, Admiral. And I doubt very much that it matters whether they agree with you on the point or not.
416	* Q, in the non-canon ''Franchise/StarTrek'' book ''I, Q''. "Yeah, and if that doesn't work, maybe the Easter Bunny will save us."
417	* Deadpan humor seems to be by far the most prevalent kind in the Franchise/StarWarsLegends; nearly all named characters (and there are plenty) will throw out a snarky line at least once.
418	** Mara Jade and Ben Skywalker are prone to this, but where Mara will start snarking just for the hell of it, Ben tends to save particularly nasty comments for moments when he's genuinely unhappy (although as we see in ''Outcast'', he's not immune to random outbursts, either). And yes, both of them share the same irreverent sense of humor. [[LikeFatherLikeSon Like mother, like son, really.]]
419	--->'''Ben:''' ''[after hearing about one of Luke's earlier failures, specifically the cave section in [=ESB=]]'' You know, it gives me hope that you screwed up so badly and so consistently as a kid, Dad.
420	** Han has a very memorable one in the ''Literature/NewJediOrder'' novel ''Destiny's Way'':
421	--->'''Han:''' What the Empire would have done is build a supercolossal Yuuzhan Vong-killing Battle Machine. They would have called it the Nova Colossus or the Galaxy Destructor or the [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking Nostril of Palpatine]] or something equally grandiose. They would have spent billions of credits, employed thousands of contractors and subcontractors, and equipped it with the latest in death-dealing technology. And you know what would have happened? It wouldn't have worked. They'd forget to bolt down a metal plate over an access hatch leading to the main reactors, or some other mistake, and a hotshot enemy pilot would drop a bomb down there and blow the whole thing up. Now ''that's'' what the Empire would have done.
422	** ''Darth Vader'' of all people in the ''Literature/CoruscantNights'' novel ''Patterns of Force''. Here's the set-up: Vader has just captured protagonist Jax Pavan and his friends with the assistance of [[spoiler:Dejah Duare]]. Jax and [[spoiler:Duare]] have a back-and-forth about the betrayal and how much Jax has figured out about before Darth interrupts them thusly:
423	--->'''Darth Vader:''' This is all vaguely interesting and amusing, Pavan. But it has gone on long enough.
424	** It would basically just be shorter to list the characters who ''aren't''. Bonus points for the Literature/XWingSeries, in which 95% of the pilots are snarkers, and ''many'' lines of dialogue are just sarcasm from one pilot to another. The characters of Creator/AaronAllston's parts of the ''X-Wing Series'' especially tend towards this trope. Most of the not-inconsiderable amount of humor in his books is of this variety.
425	--->'''Wedge:''' Phanan, Face, still Seven and Eight. I'd hate to break up the best comedy team this side of the janitor's closet.\
426	'''Phanan:''' I love an understanding commander. Know where I can get one?
427	** ''Literature/StarWarsKenobi'':
428	*** Annileen Calwell maintains her sanity through snark. Raising a pair of teenagers and being the OnlySaneWoman in the Pika Oasis as a widow will do that to you. For example, when her kids are fighting over who gets the old landspeeder, she suggests that they could share it.
429	---->'''Ben:''' Is that wise?\
430	'''Annileen:''' Oh, yes. This way, when they finally decide to run away from home, they'll get farther.
431	*** Ben himself (Obi-Wan Kenobi in exile) has his moments, such as when he shuts down a suggestive comment from Veeka Gault in almost GentlemanSnarker fashion.
432	---->'''Veeka:''' How about it, Bennie? You want to save a ''grown-up'' for a change?\
433	'''Ben:''' ''[politely]'' Fine. Do tell me when one comes in.
434	* ''Literature/TheStormlightArchive'':
435	** This is literally the ''job'' of the Alethi King's Wit. Essentially, the King's Wit exists to insult people whom the king wants insulted, since it would be beneath the king's dignity to insult them himself. The current holder of the post, a serial cameo by the name of Hoid, takes to the job with gusto and aplomb.
436	--->'''Wit:''' ''[to Sadeas]'' Every man has his place. Mine is to make insults. Yours is to be in-sluts.
437	** Shallan seems to have a compulsion to make witty remarks at almost any opportunity, though with less emphasis on the ''deadpan''. {{Discussed\|Trope}} when Jasnah gently chides her for saying "the first passably clever thing that enters your mind" and encourages her to be more thoughtful in her snark. Also occasionally {{Lampshade\|Hanging}}d:
438	--->'''Merchant:''' Brightness... I believe you stray into sarcasm.\
439	'''Shallan:''' Funny. I thought I'd run straight into it, screaming at the top of my lungs.
440	* When not being [[JerkWithAHeartOfGold kind of a jerk]], Sydney Carton from ''Literature/ATaleOfTwoCities'' is like this.
441	* Alys in ''Literature/TerraMirumChronicles'' is, in her friend Charlie's words, "Miss Always-Has-a-Snarky-Comeback."
442	* Sarah in her normal life in ''Literature/TalesOfAnMazingGirl''is pretty snarky. She tends to only think it however when she puts on her mask.
443	* ''Literature/TanteiTeamKZJikenNote'': In the beginning Aya sees Uesugi as being FourEyesZeroSoul, but he is closer to this. It's hard not to snark if TheLeader is so HotBlooded to verge into FearlessFool territory.
444	* Ex-schoolmaster and formerly-ex-British agent Reck in Manning Cole's ''A Toast to Tomorrow''. After returning from a ten-day stay at a concentration camp intended to make him more willing to act as fellow former-ex-agent Tommy Hambledon's radio operator, he commented, in part:
445	-->"There was an inaccurate notice to the effect that purity of the soul is won through labour. It was displayed where we could see it while shovelling. I find I am not, by nature, a shoveller, and the notice is a lie."
446	* ''Literature/ToKillAMockingbird'' -- Atticus Finch is an unusually benevolent version.
447	* This letter [[http://www.lettersofnote.com/2012/01/to-my-old-master.html To My Old Master]], from a former slave.
448	* Mephistopheles in Steven Brust's ''Literature/ToReignInHell''.
449	* ''Literature/TheToughGuideToFantasyland'': Jones' commentary and descriptions are full of dry, sarcastic digs at the "Management" being incompetent hacks who muck up characterization, plot, world building and can't even get basic real world facts that apply (e.g. about horses not being like bicycles, which she snarkily explains due to supposedly being the result of Fantasyland ones breeding via pollination).
450	* The Red Knight in ''Literature/TheTraitorSonCycle'' is quite fond of dry wit, especially when it serves to chastise others for their lack of confidence in him.
451	* The title character of Creator/GeorgeRRMartin's ''Literature/TufVoyaging'' really has no emotions except for sarcasm, but he disguises it with enough SpockSpeak that many of his interlocutors never realize that they've been insulted.
452	* The unnamed debt-collector narrator of most of the "Cyclops" episode in Creator/JamesJoyce's ''Literature/{{Ulysses}}'' is one of the most caustic and mean-minded snarkers ever written.
453	* Seems to be an inborn trait of the rats in ''Literature/TheUnderlandChronicles'', who are also some of the few underlanders to use informal language.
454	--> '''Twitchtip:''' (when Photos-glow-glow "can't understand" boots): Allow me to translate. She said If you don't stop your incessant bable that big rat sitting in the boat next to you will rip you head off.
455	* ''Literature/VampireAcademy'':
456	** Rose is known to have a very dry wit and sense of humor. Her mouth has a habit of getting her in trouble sometimes.
457	** Christian. Of the TallDarkAndSnarky variation. Some of his first sarcastic words to Lissa: "I love pity parties. I wish I'd brought the hats. What do you want to mope about first? How it's going to take you a whole day to be popular and loved again?"
458	* Jack in Sebastian Rook's ''Vampire Plague'' books. It really comes out when he's confronted with vampires. Or Dominique.
459	* The ''Literature/VillageTales'' series is overloaded with them. Never mind the CastFullOfPrettyBoys, the series is stuffed to the gunwales with Deadpan Snarkers, engaging in SnarkToSnarkCombat in a WorldOfSnark. The Duke of Taunton, GentlemanSnarker, alone had been enough for most books. He is ''not'' alone. Even his [[TheVicar mild-mannered]] Rector has pointed out that the primary difference between the Duke and God –- in case His Grace has again confused the two –- is that God doesn't labor under the delusion he's the duke of Taunton; his nephews snark for Oxford; his old mucker the Nawab snarks; for that matter, even the duke's [[NoSenseOfHumor humorless]] GrandeDame sister-in-law gets in a fair few, let alone the other neighbors.
460	--> '''Connie (Lady Crispin) Fitzjames, the Duke's sister-in-law, on the Village Concert, in ''Literature/CrossAndPoppy'':''' I wash my hands of it.\
461	'''The Duke:''' You'd have made a splendid prefect of Judaea.\
462	and, in ''Literature/{{Evensong}},'' regarding the BigBand music for a servants' dance:
463	--> '''Sher Mirza:''' I suppose you'll want some Ellington as well?.\
464	'''The Duke:''' Don't be silly, Sher. ({{Beat}}.) Too many dukes.
465	* ''Literature/{{Villette}}'' has Lucy. Especially when talking to her friend [[LovableAlphaBitch Ginevra.]]
466	* Many of the characters in the Literature/VorkosiganSaga have their moments, particularly Miles Vorkosigan himself, but Simon Illyan is probably the best example.
467	* The Russian diplomat Bilibin in ''Literature/WarAndPeace'', known later in Petersburg society for what he calls his ''[[OneLiner mots]]'' ([[BilingualBonus French]] for "sayings").
468	* Jayfeather and Yellowfang from ''Literature/WarriorCats''; they're the two biggest snarkers in the series, which is possibly the reason they didn't get along very well.
469	** Cloudtail is also repeatedly referred to as having a sharp tongue.
470	** Squirrelflight and Ivypool also qualify.
471	* ''Literature/TheWheelOfTime'' has several:
472	** The most obvious and recurring one is Matrim Cauthon. It eventually gets edged out by him being a MemeticBadass.
473	*** His lieutenant, Talmanes, is so subtle at it that it took Mat months to realize that Talmanes was doing it at all - and then he quickly realized Talmanes never ''wasn't'' snarking.
474	** Lan Mandragoran. TallDarkAndSnarky, to boot.
475	** Rand eventually gets shades of a gentle version after [[spoiler: his near destruction of the world]].
476	** The Aiel, in their own way. You'll have to know their culture to get their jokes, though. Sometimes better than the reader.
477	* ''Literature/WarsOfTheRealm'' has several.
478	** There's Sason:
479	--> '''Validus''': Elohim has given Crenshaw the ability to sense and determine events moments before they happen.\
480	'''Sason''': ''[to Crenshaw]'' So you can see the future.
481	** Brumak:
482	--> '''Validus''': Warrior Brumak.\
483	'''Brumak''': This is the voice of Validus. How goes the life of ease and comfort in America?\
484	...\
485	'''Validus''': On your feet, warrior. You've been reassigned under my command, and we leave immediately.\
486	'''Brumak''': Porthan must think I need a vacation.
487	** And the human Benjamin Berg:
488	--> '''Ben''': He [my father] will forever be upset that I didn't try to follow in his glorious athletic footsteps. Any mocking I may receive would be considered justifiable payment for neglecting the more appropriate and respected activities.\
489	Ben sure had sarcasm down to a fine art.
490	* So, so many characters by Creator/OscarWilde. To name a few: Lord Henry from ''Literature/ThePictureOfDorianGray''; Vivian in "The Decay Of Lying -- An Observation"; Algeron and Lady Bracknell in ''Theater/TheImportanceOfBeingEarnest''.
491	* ''Literature/TheWindwaterPack'': The reason Ashtree says sarcasm is Zephyr's first language. Apparently an inherited trait i.e. Layla and Cian. Sequana has her moments too. As does Moira: "You want to sing? This could easily be someone's territory. Sure; let's announce our presence to all and sundry."
492	* ''Literature/WingsOfFire'' has a few examples:
493	** Glory the [=RainWing=] has a very sharp wit, quite unlike [[FantasticRacism the stereotype of her tribe]].
494	--> ''"We don’t have to kill him," Tsunami said. "We’ll tie him up an leave him here."
495	--> ''[[SarcasmMode "Great," Glory said. "How about a trail of cow parts, too? Or perhaps we could set this part of the forest on fire, just to make sure everyone knows how to find us. Would you like me to spell out ‘DRAGONETS WUZ HERE’ in giant rocks?"]]''
496	** Kestrel has her moments, too. Almost all of The Dragonet Prophecy’s prologue where she appears for example.
497	** Winter as well, but mostly in his thoughts.
498	--> [[spoiler: Just what I need, a bunch of glaciers slowing me down.]]
499	* ''Literature/WinnieThePooh'':
500	** Despite having a [[TheEeyore different trope named for him]], Eeyore in Creator/AAMilne's original ''Literature/WinnieThePooh'' books is very much a DeadpanSnarker; only his Disney-fied film version is the sort of lovable depressive that can grace so many pastel-colored sweatshirts.
501	-->''"Oh, Eeyore, [[CaptainObvious you are wet!]]" said Piglet, feeling him.''
502	-->''Eeyore shook himself, and asked somebody to explain to Piglet what happened when you had been inside a river for quite a long time.''
503	** Rabbit has a couple of moments as well.
504	* ''Literature/TheWitchlands'' has Safi, whose sharpest weapon is not her knife, but her tongue, to the point where some characters wonder if she's ever ''not'' snarking.
505	-->Do all Hell-Bards waddle like ducks, or is it just you?
506

Context DeadpanSnarker / Literature