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1Note: Given the size of the cast, it's probably a good idea to only include the major characters here.
2
3!! The Narrator
4* InteractiveNarrator: Sometimes shows up to deliver exposition, explain morals, interrupt the exciting bits, and occasionally sing.
5* UnreliableNarrator: Not precisely deceptive, but his pro-Liu Bei bias makes him less than even-handed.
6
7!! Liu Bei
8The "hero" of the work, though ''Farce'' characterizes him more as the DesignatedHero.
9
10* AntiHero: Is not a very nice person in ''Farce''.
11* DirtyCoward: Not a good look for the hero of the story, but he is this.
12* ImAHumanitarian: To be fair, he didn't realize that Liu An had butchered his wife to get him something to eat. What's really disturbing is his reaction once he realizes, where he shrugs it off as no big deal and is touched at the sacrifice.
13* ItsAllAboutMe: Lampshaded when he's bragging to his allies about how Liu An killed his wife and fed her to him when he had no other food.
14--> '''Cao Cao:''' This book really does revolve around you, doesn’t it?
15* StalkingIsLove: Liu Bei gains Zhuge Liang's undying loyalty by being ''extremely'' creepy.
16
17!! Cao Cao
18The "villain" of the work. And boy does he know it.
19
20* AffablyEvil
21* AntiHero / AntiVillain: Depending on where you're standing.
22* AttentionDeficitOohShiny: Although Big Xun and Little Xun usually keep him on track.
23* BadassBoast: "Underlings like you can’t understand the grand designs of people like me!" in Chapter 4. It works.
24* ButtMonkey: In the chapter titles alone, he gets multiple bad haircuts, is beaned by an old lady, and is chased by a zombie army. And that's aside from the whole being-the-villain issue.
25* ChivalrousPervert: Cao Cao will always strip defeated enemies... then offer them a nice job.
26* HatDamage: Threatens to execute Chen Gong for this, but later brushes it off when he's had time to cool down.
27* PetTheDog: Makes this his official policy, hoping to become a VillainWithGoodPublicity. He has some success, but no one really changes their mind about him being the villain.
28* ThenLetMeBeEvil: Cao Cao has shades of this, since he's the DesignatedVillain, regardless of what he does.
29* TraumaticHaircut: Has a couple.
30
31
32!! Dong Zhuo
33An early villainous character.
34
35* ArcVillain: Is the major antagonist of the early portions of the book, up to about chapter 9.
36* CardCarryingVillain: And revels in it.
37* FatBastard: Overweight and a horrible human being.
38
39!! Sun Quan
40* AdaptationalSexuality: Is Lu Su's boyfriend in this version of the story.
41* CloudCuckoolander: Especially towards the end, he seems to be not quite all there.
42* GoodIsDumb: He may be the nicest of the rulers of the three kingdoms, but he's not terribly bright.
43* MamasBoy: Very much his Aunt Stepmom's Boy.
44* SpareToTheThrone: But he does a decent job, mostly thanks to his advisors.
45
46!! Sun Qian
47Liu Bei's teleporting mailman. Not to be confused with Sun Quan.
48* FlashyTeleportation: From [[https://kivutarsklassics.wordpress.com/2018/09/09/chapter-51-in-which-everyone-plays-musical-cities/ Chapter 51]], which has a pop:
49--> Zhou Yu. “Go tell him, will you?”\
50Sun Qian disappeared with a pop
51* StealthyTeleportation: From [[https://kivutarsklassics.wordpress.com/2018/09/09/chapter-28-in-which-the-band-gets-back-together-for-some-more-pointless-wandering-around/ Chapter 28]]:
52--> Sun Qian nodded and vanished, reappearing the next moment in front of Zhang Fei.\
53“Gah!” squawked Zhang Fei.

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