History Main / UnableToSupportAWife

* The Pocket Circuit subplot from ''VideoGame/{{Yakuza}} Kiwami'' is centered around this; [[LargeHamAnnouncer Pocket Circuit Fighter]] has finally found a girl he likes, but her family is rather old fashioned and doesn't think a minimum wage announcer for a children's racing game is a good match for their daughter. The Fighter is looking to retire and inherit his family's tofu business, but rather than shut down the Pocket Circuit track he asks Kiryu to find someone to take his place as Pocket Circuit Fighter.

[[folder:Film]]

Defying this trope is often unwise. Perhaps they will manage -- either he can become the SelfMadeMan or they can live happily on less than her parents' opinion -- but it can also lead to a marriage becoming unhappy due to constant conflicts over money, and sometimes to injury, illness, or even death owing to privation. Many a rich man's son, disinherited, has learned the hard way that he has no useful skills to support even himself.

* In ''Manga/MaisonIkkoku'' Godai could barely support ''himself'' for the longest time, so this very much came into play.
* In ''LightNovel/SpiceAndWolf'', one of Lawrence's motivations for trading is to earn himself enough money to get married. In addition, one person he asks for money when he's in dire straits refuses him because he's running around with a woman, and so he can apparently afford more than he's letting on.

* In ''Manga/HajimeNoIppo'', Eiji Date is a boxer married to Aiko, a woman from a rich family. While his wife's father and younger brother liked Date as a person, they feared that he wouldn't be able to provide for Aiko, who on top of it is an IllGirl. After a harsh deal where not only he [[spoiler: loses a fight for a World Championship]] ''but'' [[spoiler: Aiko suffers a miscarriage]], he retires from boxing and gets a stable job in an office, much to the relief of her family. [[spoiler: And to Aiko's worry, since she soon realizes that Date is a natural fighter and that he's giving up on his dreams for her sake. After they have a healthy son, Yuushi, she confronts him about it and [[MyGreatestSecondChance urges him to return to the ring]].]]

* In ''Literature/ABrothersPrice'', women must have enough money to pay the sisters of one of the [[GenderRarityValue rare men]] the eponymous "Brother's Price", ''and'' support the husband. As all the sisters in a family usually share one husband, this is doable for most, but Jerin's former teacher is still overjoyed that she and her sisters can ''finally'' afford a husband.

* A WholeEpisodeFlashback of''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'' tells the story of how Homer and Marge got married. [[AMistakeIsBorn Homer accidentally gets Marge pregnant]], forcing them to marry. The trouble is, they're both living with their parents working dead-end minimum wage jobs. Their relationship almost falls apart because Homer can't figure out how to make enough money to support the family.

Sometimes the obstacle to marriage is just plain money: The man cannot earn enough -- or have an independent source of income -- to support a family. This trope has a long history -- mostly in settings where a woman leaves her parents' home for that of her husband, but also where single adults can live in dormitories and the like, but living in a residence of your own is expected for married couples.

* Creator/JaneAusten's sister Cassandra was engaged to her father's former pupil Thomas Fowle. Fowle needed money to marry, so went to the Caribbean as chaplain with a military expedition. Unfortunately, Fowle died there of yellow fever in 1797. Cassandra inherited 1000 pounds from him (a sum that gave her some financial independence), but she never married.

[[folder:ComicBooks]]

[[folder:FairyTale]]
* A staple of fairy tales has a poor man try to win the hand of a princess (or otherwise high-born or rich girl), only for her father to refuse to give permission unless the man can prove he has the means to keep the girl in the life of luxury she was used to living in. This usually comes by the father demanding the suitor build a house as fine as his own, which the suitor manages using some magic item or another.

* In ''Literature/HarryPotter'' fanfic ''Fanfic/ThePeaceNotPromised'', Severus would be eager to marry Lily except that he's near penniless (good employment prospects, but no savings). And he is aware that [[PeggySue in the previous timeline]], Lily married James Potter and would never have had to worry about money again, making him feel rather inadequate. [[spoiler: They marry early anyway, in the end, when her father passes away unexpectedly; she's no longer receiving any financial support, so there's nothing to be lost by pooling their resources. Furthermore, without her father to give her away, a dream wedding is no longer on the cards.]]

* In ''Film/TheMarryingKind'', Chet Keefer doesn’t have a job due do an injury, and his wife Florence has to get one. He, of course, didn’t want her to, but there was nothing else they could do. Mind you, this is during the 1950s when the norm was that the husband holds the job while the wife manages household affairs.

** Beauty's sister Hope is in love with a man who wants to leave the city and become a [[TheBlacksmith blacksmith]], which would never let him get money enough for a wealthy merchant's daughter. When their family is ruined, he pays his suit and tells her father that they can all come and live at the house he can get. (It helps that the girls' father likes him anyway, and might have consented to the match regardless.)

* Briefly mentioned in ''Literature/TheBelgariad''. A talented journeyman glassblower gives Garion a beautiful glass sculpture to present to his Aunt Pol. He admits that the reason he's doing this is because if people in the court see the King's aunt in possession of one of his works, they might commission some work from him themselves, and he needs commissions if he wants to be able to open his own shop, which he has to do before he can seriously court his master's daughter. When he's next seen, he's succeeded in becoming a master with his own shop, though whether or not he got the girl isn't mentioned.

[[folder:RealLife]]

:: However, Junot subverts the trope with the following.

* In the Literature/SixteenThirtyTwo series, a recurring theme is the uptime Americans coming to grips with how big a deal this is for downtimers. The short story "To Dye For" deals with this specifically when Tom "Stoner" Stone falls in love with a local woman. He's an aging hippie with a heart of gold and no interest in money. His love interest would be happy to live on his commune with him, but her father forbids the union solely because of Tom's financial status. This triggers him to use his uptime chemical knowledge to build the world's only synthetic dye industry, winning her father over (and ultimately becoming one of the dozen or so richest men in Europe).
* In ''Literature/AndThenThereWereNone'', this leads to the death of a child. You see, his governess was in love with the child's uncle, who was in this position because of the child's existence. With the child out of the way, the uncle would inherit the family fortune and be able to marry the governess. She did fail to factor in that the uncle genuinely loved his nephew...

* [[Literature/AubreyMaturin Aubrey/Maturin series]]: In the second and third novels, Mrs. Williams does not permit her daughter Sophie to marry Jack Aubrey until he can prove that he is able to support her. Luckily for Jack, Sophie resists all attempts to marry her off to someone else until he earns a fortune from the East India Company.

* In Anthony Trollope's ''Ayala's Angel'', this is the main problem for Ayala's sister Lucy and her suitor Isadore Hamel, a sculptor who refuses to compromise his principles to make money, despite the attempts of Lucy's uncle to convince him to do so. He's ready to marry her despite his lack of money; though Lucy's sensible uncle prevents this until Ayala's suitor gives him some money and he achieves some more success.

* In Creator/JohnCWright's ''[[Literature/ChroniclesOfChaos Titans of Chaos]]'', at the climax, Victor reveals his love for Amelia; he had wanted to wait until he had more to offer than himself, but the danger is too great.

* In Creator/PatriciaCWrede's Literature/FrontierMagic novel ''The Far West'', Roger explains he can not ask Eff to marry him because the expedition will be years, but he will be able to support a wife at the end of it.

* In Stephanie Burgis's ''[[Literature/KatIncorrigible A Most Improper Magick]]'', Sir Neville and Mr. Collingwood are brothers, but since Sir Neville inherited all, he's the only eligible one.

* Shows up a few times in Creator/RudyardKipling's short stories--particularly ''Plain Tales from the Hills'', explaining why a particular character came to [[UsefulNotes/TheRaj India]] or giving him additional motivation to distinguish himself there.

* In the works of Creator/PGWodehouse, this occurs very, very, very frequently. The plot often involves a ZanyScheme to gain the favour of some wealthy relative who can then give the protagonist an allowance to support his intended.
** In ''Uneasy Money'', Bill's poverty means he and Claire can't marry. Claire is quite unpleasantly explicit about his need to get some.
** In ''Money in the Bank'', Lionel insists on keeping their engagement secret so he can wheedle money out of this aunt.
** One of the Literature/JeevesAndWooster stories. A friend of Bertie Wooster's has two problems with his intended bride: firstly he can't support her, and second, he is an upper-class gentleman and she is a waitress, and his rich uncle (where the money has to come from) will never agree to the marriage. Jeeves arranges for the rich uncle to be read romance stories in which aristocrats marry commoners, to soften his heart. This works... and [[GoneHorriblyRight the uncle marries his own cook]], meaning ''he'' now needs the money to support a wife and can't give an allowance to Bertie's friend. By an extraordinary coincidence, it turns out that the friend's intended bride was the same young person whom Jeeves himself was involved with.
** In ''Jill the Reckless'', Mrs. Barker is familiar with this trope from [[GenreSavvy romance reading]] but notes that Derek has his own money, so she is not sure why his mother can interfere. Barker has to explain the MyBelovedSmother and MommasBoy dynamic involved.
** In "Jeeves Takes Charge", the story where Bertie hires him, Bertie is faced with a dilemma: Florence won't marry him unless he steals his uncle's memoirs, to keep them from being published, and he's dependent on that uncle for his money.

* In the ''VideoGame/{{Fable}}'' games, the Hero needs to own a house before they can propose marriage. Additionally, in ''VideoGame/FableII'' and ''VideoGame/FableIII'', consistently failing to provide a husband or wife with an adequate daily allowance is grounds for divorce.

[[folder: Myths and Legends]]

** ''Literature/LoveAndFriendship'', Edward's sister puts her thumb on the problem of his rash marriage.

** With Creator/GordonRDickson's, in ''Literature/{{Hoka}}'', Alex wants to marry but can't on his meager salary.

* In the PerspectiveFlip novel ''Mr. Darcy's Diary,'' which explores ''Literature/PrideAndPrejudice'' from Darcy's point of view, this is given as the reason why Darcy helps Wickham get a new position in the military. Wickham says he has to have some kind of post in order to support a wife, so if Darcy wants him to marry Lydia, he'd best help.

* In Creator/StephenHunt's ''Secrets of the Fire Sea'', Jethro explains he had been engaged to Alice Gray but lost his living, making it impossible.

* Occurs in ''Series/TheWire'' season 2 with Nick Sobotka and his girlfriend Ashley; the two can't afford to get a place together.

* Music/FlandersAndSwann: The singer in "The Youth of the Heart" wouldn't marry his sweetheart until he'd earned enough to support her... by which time, she'd married someone else.

* In ''VideoGame/LoveNikkiDressUpQueen'', Zhong Lizi is a SelfMadeMan who seriously fears that he won't be able to provide for his girlfriend Bai Jinjin (who comes from a very rich family). He even considered breaking up with her and leaving for a while, then returning only after he's made a name for himself. [[spoiler: Her response was running away from home to join him.]]

* In Creator/CharlesDickens' ''Literature/ThePickwickPapers'', Pickwick, talking to his landlady, asks whether it's true that two can live as cheaply as one -- because he's thinking of hiring a manservant. She takes it as considering whether this trope applies and so a marriage proposal.
* Prominent in ''Literature/GoneWithTheWind'' after the war. Alex Fontaine wants to marry Dimity Munroe, but honor prevents him from asking her until he can support her. Frank Kennedy holds off on marrying Suellen for the same reasons. Scarlett at one point bemoans that there will be a lot of old maids in the South because of this trope.
* It is central to the plot of Margaret Oliphant's ''The Perpetual Curate'' that he is in love and can't marry.
* Part of the Tin Woodman's backstory in ''Literature/TheWonderfulWizardOfOz''. He loved a Munchkin girl, and she promised that she would marry him when he had earned enough to build her a proper house. [[ParentalMarriageVeto The old woman the girl lived with didn't like that idea]], and she got the Wicked Witch of the East to sabotage his efforts, which led to him becoming tin so he had no heart and couldn't love.
* [[Literature/AubreyMaturin Aubrey/Maturin series]]: In the second and third novels, Mrs. Williams does not permit her daughter Sophie to marry Jack Aubrey until he can prove that he is able to support her. Luckily for Jack, Sophie resists all attempts to marry her off to someone else until he earns a fortune from the East India Company.
* In Creator/StephenHunt's ''Secrets of the Fire Sea'', Jethro explains he had been engaged to Alice Gray but lost his living, making it impossible.

* Creator/DorothyLSayers' Literature/LordPeterWimsey novels:
** ''Clouds of Witness'': Denver had been able to dismiss Goyles because he couldn't support Mary or any other wife, and while he would have been willing to live on Mary's money, she doesn't get it without her brother's approval of the match.
** ''The Unpleasantness at the Bellona Club'', the aged General Fentiman's original will left his married grandson George what little money he had because his older brother Robert wasn't married and had his commission. Then the old General finds himself the heir to a large fortune. By now George has become a ShellShockedVeteran and his grandfather seriously considers leaving half the money to his wife Sheila instead. [[spoiler: Robert later explained that he found the old General's body when he was coming back to point out to his grandfather that leaving the money to George so that he could support his wife might help stabilize him.]]
** ''Unnatural Death'', when recounting the Dawson family history, the OldRetainer explains that when they lost their money, Mr. Stephen was thrown over by his rich fiancee.

* Briefly mentioned in ''Literature/TheBelgariad''. A talented journeyman glassblower gives Garion a beautiful glass sculpture to present to his Aunt Pol. He admits that the reason he's doing this is because if people in the court see the King's aunt in possession of one of his works, they might commission some work from him themselves, and he needs commissions if he wants to be able to open his own shop, which he has to do before he can seriously court his master's daughter. When he's next seen, he's succeeded in becoming a master with his own shop, though whether or not he got the girl isn't mentioned.
* In Creator/JohnCWright's ''[[Literature/ChroniclesOfChaos Titans of Chaos]]'', at the climax, Victor reveals his love for Amelia; he had wanted to wait until he had more to offer than himself, but the danger is too great.
* In Anthony Trollope's ''Ayala's Angel'', this is the main problem for Ayala's sister Lucy and her suitor Isadore Hamel, a sculptor who refuses to compromise his principles to make money, despite the attempts of Lucy's uncle to convince him to do so. He's ready to marry her despite his lack of money; though Lucy's sensible uncle prevents this until Ayala's suitor gives him some money and he achieves some more success.
* In Creator/PatriciaCWrede's Literature/FrontierMagic novel ''The Far West'', Roger explains he can not ask Eff to marry him because the expedition will be years, but he will be able to support a wife at the end of it.
* In the Literature/SixteenThirtyTwo series, a recurring theme is the uptime Americans coming to grips with how big a deal this is for downtimers. The short story "To Dye For" deals with this specifically when Tom "Stoner" Stone falls in love with a local woman. He's an aging hippie with a heart of gold and no interest in money. His love interest would be happy to live on his commune with him, but her father forbids the union solely because of Tom's financial status. This triggers him to use his uptime chemical knowledge to build the world's only synthetic dye industry, winning her father over (and ultimately becoming one of the dozen or so richest men in Europe).
* In Creator/SusannaClarke's ''Literature/JonathanStrangeAndMrNorrell'', when Mr. Norrell arrives at his first party in London, he overhears a man telling a woman how he persuaded one young woman to give up her true love for a wealthy man: first he introduced her to the charms of fine (and expensive) jewelry, then he got her penniless love to gamble, so he was deeply in debt -- and pointed out to him that a man with no money was one thing, but one in debt was another.
* In Stephanie Burgis's ''[[Literature/KatIncorrigible A Most Improper Magick]]'', Sir Neville and Mr. Collingwood are brothers, but since Sir Neville inherited all, he's the only eligible one.

* In ''Literature/HeartOfDarkness'', Marlow speculates that this is why Kurtz went to seek his fortune in Africa:
-->''"I had heard that her engagement with Kurtz had been disapproved by her people. He wasn't rich enough or something."''
* In ''Jo's Boys'' by Louisa May Alcott, Daisy's mother Meg [[ParentalMarriageVeto opposes]] to Daisy marrying Nat because she fears he plays this trope straight, what with him being a poor orphan turned into a struggling musician. Once Nat makes a name for himself in music, Meg relents.
* ''Literature/JourneyToChaos'': When Eric talks about how he wants to get stronger and advance through the ranks of his guild, Tasio quotes this trope to tease him about his crush on Annala. [[SheIsNotMyGirlfriend Eric denies this is the case.]]
* In ''Literature/AndThenThereWereNone'', this leads to the death of a child. You see, his governess was in love with the child's uncle, who was in this position because of the child's existence. With the child out of the way, the uncle would inherit the family fortune and be able to marry the governess. She did fail to factor in that the uncle genuinely loved his nephew...
* In ''Literature/HarryPotterAndTheHalfBloodPrince'', Remus Lupin cites his poverty as a reason why he can't marry, albeit not the major one. [[spoiler:All of his friends unite with his beloved to say he should, and he yields.]]

* In ''Literature/ABrothersPrice'', women must have enough money to pay the sisters of one of the [[GenderRarityValue rare men]] the eponymous "Brother's Price", ''and'' support the husband. As all the sisters in a family usually share one husband, this is doable for most, but Jerin's former teacher is still overjoyed that she and her sisters can ''finally'' afford a husband.
* Towards the end of ''Literature/{{Dodger}}'', the main character invokes this on ''himself'': he can't propose to Simplicity while he's a tosher (a job involving scrounging for lost valuables in storm drains and sewers, which has a decidedly irregular income and low life expectancy). Fortunately, by the time he makes this decision, he'd also acquired the contacts necessary to find a more respectable (and better paying) career for himself.

* In ''Manga/ABridesStory'', Ali mentions that he plans to get married once he has a stable income.

* Several of Creator/JunjiIto's protagonists run into this problem. In one case the father was continuing to deny it even from the afterlife.
* In ''Manga/HajimeNoIppo'', Eiji Date is a boxer married to Aiko, a woman from a rich family. While his wife's father and younger brother liked Date as a person, they feared that he wouldn't be able to provide for Aiko, who on top of it is an IllGirl. After a harsh deal where not only he [[spoiler: loses a fight for a World Championship]] ''but'' [[spoiler: Aiko suffers a miscarriage]], he retires from boxing and gets a stable job in an office, much to the relief of her family. [[spoiler: And to Aiko's worry, since she soon realizes that Date is a natural fighter and that he's giving up on his dreams for her sake. After they have a healthy son, Yuushi, she confronts him about it and [[MyGreatestSecondChance urges him to return to the ring]].]]
* ''Anime/{{Aggretsuko}}'': this is why Retsuko initially rejects Haida's affections, as her entire motivation for getting married is to get out of her mind-numbing office job, and not only can he not afford to let her quit, he'd want her to stay so they could motivate each other.

* In ''Film/{{Fury 1936}}'', Joe can't support a wife, which is why Katherine leaves town to find a better job. Joe makes good with the gas station and sets out to reunite with Katherine, only to be tragically interrupted.
* In ''Film/CafeSetareh'', Ebi's inability to support Salomeh is what motivates him to [[spoiler: steal Fariba's jewellery, which he gets arrested for.]]
* Played with in ''Film/AKnightsTale''. When William's false-knighthood is about to be publicly revealed, his noble-born love interest asks him to run away (rather than see him arrested and possibly executed) and insists they can live a happy life together as peasants. He refuses, [[BecomingTheMask mostly because he now sees himself as a TRUE knight]], but also because it would mean ''lowering her'' to living like a peasant "with the pigs inside the house in winter". If he can't successfully raise himself to her level of society, he won't allow her to lower herself into his.
* In ''Film/TheMarryingKind'', Chet Keefer doesn’t have a job due do an injury, and his wife Florence has to get one. He, of course, didn’t want her to, but there was nothing else they could do. Mind you, this is during the 1950s when the norm was that the husband holds the job while the wife manages household affairs.

** ''Literature/LoveAndFreindship'', Edward's sister puts her thumb on the problem of his rash marriage.

* In Creator/PoulAnderson and Creator/GordonRDickson's second ''Literature/{{Hoka}}'' story, Alex wants to marry but can't on his meager salary.
* In Creator/PoulAnderson's "The Corkscrew of Space", Magarac, before the DearJohnLetter, had gone to Mars to make the money.
* In Creator/PoulAnderson's "Critique of Impure Reason", Janet tries to soothe Tunny with the suggestion that they could live in her salary; Tunny rejects the notion, Janet calls him medieval, and Tunny says he can be very medieval.

* In the works of Creator/PGWodehouse, this occurs very, very, very frequently. The plot often involves a ZanyScheme to gain the favour of some wealthy relative who can then give the protagonist an allowance to support his intended.
** In ''Uneasy Money'', Bill's poverty means he and Claire can't marry. Claire is quite unpleasantly explicit about his need to get some.
** In ''Money in the Bank'', Lionel insists on keeping their engagement secret so he can wheedle money out of this aunt.
** One of the Literature/JeevesAndWooster stories. A friend of Bertie Wooster's has two problems with his intended bride: firstly he can't support her, and second, he is an upper-class gentleman and she is a waitress, and his rich uncle (where the money has to come from) will never agree to the marriage. Jeeves arranges for the rich uncle to be read romance stories in which aristocrats marry commoners, to soften his heart. This works... and [[GoneHorriblyRight the uncle marries his own cook]], meaning ''he'' now needs the money to support a wife and can't give an allowance to Bertie's friend. By an extraordinary coincidence, it turns out that the friend's intended bride was the same young person whom Jeeves himself was involved with.
** In ''Jill the Reckless'', Mrs. Barker is familiar with this trope from [[GenreSavvy romance reading]] but notes that Derek has his own money, so she is not sure why his mother can interfere. Barker has to explain the MyBelovedSmother and MommasBoy dynamic involved.
** In "Jeeves Takes Charge", the story where Bertie hires him, Bertie is faced with a dilemma: Florence won't marry him unless he steals his uncle's memoirs, to keep them from being published, and he's dependent on that uncle for his money.

* Creator/RobinMcKinley's ''Literature/BeautyARetellingOfBeautyAndTheBeast'':
** Beauty's sister Hope is in love with a man who wants to leave the city and become a [[TheBlacksmith blacksmith]], which would never let him get money enough for a wealthy merchant's daughter. When their family is ruined, he pays his suit and tells her father that they can all come and live at the house he can get. (It helps that the girls' father likes him anyway, and might have consented to the match regardless.)
** The other sister Grace's fiancé is a sailor who sets out on a voyage to make his fortune so he can better provide for her. Unfortunately, his ship goes down in the storm that destroys most of the merchant's fleet and he's [[NeverFoundTheBody presumed dead]], [[spoiler: until Beauty learns with help from the Beast that he's still alive]].

* Prominent in ''Literature/GoneWithTheWind'' after the war. Alex Fontaine wants to marry Dimity Munroe, but honor prevents him from asking her until he can support her. Frank Kennedy holds off on marrying Suellen for the same reasons. Scarlett at one point bemoans that there will be a lot of old maids in the South because of this trope.

* In ''Theatre/AGentlemansGuideToLoveAndMurder'', Sibella chooses to enter a loveless marriage with Lionel Holland rather than with the guy she is actually attracted to, Monty. Ironically and unluckily for Sibella, Monty ends up with an UnexpectedInheritance and becomes an Earl soon after Sibella marries Holland, and she has to settle with being his mistress.

* Creator/JaneAusten's sister Cassandra was engaged to her father's former pupil Thomas Fowle. Fowle needed money to marry, so went to the Caribbean as chaplain with a military expedition. Unfortunately, Fowle died there of yellow fever in 1797. Cassandra inherited 1000 pounds from him (a sum that gave her some financial independence), but she never married.