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* BadassBoast: Zuula opens her final fight with the King's men with "Come then! Come and die!". She follows that up a little while later.
-->'''Zuula:''' Foolish boys...\\
Unclever girls...\\
You come to kill an orc? you come to kill an ''orc'' in the ''night''?
-->'''Zuula:''' Foolish boys...\\
Unclever girls...\\
You come to kill an orc? you come to kill an ''orc'' in the ''night''?
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* OhCrap: You go adventuring you're going to find yourself in unexpected dangerous situations. It gets worse when the shit hits you at home. Celia and Threadbare face a lot of trouble and come through it, after a struggle. Then Mordecai and Caradon face an army at Caradon's house... and they don't.
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* TrashTheSet: Mordecai returns to Caradon's house to find the place half in ruins thanks to a night of fighting random disasters caused by Missus Fluffbear's terrible luck. It only gets worse when the King arrives.
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* AngryBlackManStereotype: All half-orcs get tagged with this. Garon gets it really hard because he, unlike his brothers, got the orcish racial buff "Blood Rage", which sends him into a powerful rage but also saps his hit points and means he always, always has to control his temper.
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* AngryBlackManStereotype: All half-orcs get tagged with this. Garon gets it really hard because he, unlike his brothers, got the orcish racial buff "Blood "Twisted Rage", which sends him into a powerful rage but also saps his hit points and means he always, always has to control his temper.
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* BraveScot: Berry has a strong scots accent as indicated by the text, and she's one aggressive cleric.
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* BraveScot: Berry Beryl has a strong scots accent as indicated by the text, and she's one aggressive cleric.
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* EmbarrassingButEmpoweringOutfit: Threadbare needs pockets to carry stuff and he needs the dragon toy so Celia can talk to him. He ends up wearing the dragon as a ridiculous hat and a pair of Celia's panties, with pockets sewn on, as a tunic.
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* ReviveKillsZombie: Threadbare discovers that his hugs kill the undead quite by accident.
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* AngryBlackManStereotype: All half-orcs get tagged with this. Garon gets it really hard because he, unlike his brothers, got the orcish racial buff "Blood Rage", which sends him into a powerful rage but also saps his hit points and means he always, always has to control his temper.
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* BraveScot: Berry has a strong scots accent as indicated by the text, and she's one aggressive cleric.
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* SweetHomeAlabama: Mordecai and his kids have strong southern accents. That's kind of weird, because Mordecai, as a Scout, would've spent a lot more time away from home than their mother, Zuula, who has [[UsefulNotes/TheCaribbean a thick Caribbean accent,]] [[ButNotTooForeign albeit without the patois]].
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* KickTheDog: Literally. The King's Guard punted Backy's pet bloodhound off the mountain outside Catamountain Dungeon because "they said it was too weak to survive the dungeon".
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* FantasticRacism: Humans are basically white people and other races are other races dealing with their shit. Some, like Celia, are InnocentlyInsensitive, others, like the King's Guard, are openly hostile.
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* InnocentlyInsensitive: Celia asks what it's like to be a half-orc. Zuula declines to answer and leaves it to the kids. They explain, among other things, that only humans ask things like that.
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* SlapSlapKiss: Zuula's an orc and they express things quite physically. When Mordecai comes home late without having sent word, she lets him know she's upset with a club to the face. Then they get romantic. Mordecai reassures Celia beforehand that he likes it. The kids go fishing so they don't have to hear it.
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* PintsizedPowerhouse: Threadbare rapidly gains strength far out of proportion to... being a teddy bear. Even so, he still only has the mass of a teddy bear, so when he goes fishing he gets pulled into the water by a trout that's much heavier than he is.
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* SuperFunHappyThingOfDoom: The ObviouslyEvil woman Celia and Threadbare meet in the woods is named "Anise Layd'I". No. No she is not A Nice Lady.
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* CallARabbitASmeerp: Grindluck is a card game for little kids that helps improve their luck stat. It's just Go Fish.
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* WhatTheHellIsThatAccent: Maddy the vampire has some kind of broad accent that makes her say "nice" as "nahse". Given her later characterization, she's ''probably'' intended to be a Jersey girl.
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* ImprobableAimingSkills: As a high level Archer, Mordecai can pull of some tricks, like planting an arrow between your fingers or spelling out the word YES rapid fire.
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* NaughtyTentacles: People believe this about the Gropevines, but the narration assures us that all they want to do is kill and eat you and aren't weird about it.
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* UnwittingInstigatorOfDoom: Because he doesn't understand about good and evil, Threadbare accepts Anise's quest and takes her Caradon's scrolls.
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* AbsurdlyLowLevelCap: It doesn't take very long to hit level 25 in a job, especially if you take to adventuring. And when you're surrounded by monsters and dungeons, you're kind of forced to take up adventuring.
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* HumansAreTheRealMonsters: Back in the past, after the change to the new jobs and leveling system, people found out fairly quickly that level 25 was the max, but monsters didn't have that limit. However, the real threat came from fellow humans after they found a way around the level cap.
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* BornUnlucky: The reason Threadbare barely survives his earliest days is because all the worst things just happen to happen to him. That's because luck is a stat and his low luck means all the worst things ''will'' happen to him in the most [[ContrivedCoincidence contrived ways]].
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* WorldOfPun: It's downplayed in the broader world, which is more pastiche than pun, but the dungeons crank the pun dial all the way up. They get themes and run with them.
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* HeroicMime: Threadbare says not one word through the entirety of the book, because he's a stuffed toy with no mouth, lungs, or vocal chords. [[spoiler:He uses his new tailor job to change this at the very end of the book and finally accesses the full panoply of information and abilities available to the people of Cylvania.]]
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* TookALevelInBadass: Threadbare survived his infancy. As we'll see, that's quite an achievement for an unprepared Greater Golem. But then that little teddy bear just kept on marching into danger with his little girl...
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[[foldercontrol]]
[[folder:Threadbare at birth]]
[[folder:Threadbare at birth]]
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[[/folder]]
[[folder:Threadbare at the end of ''Stuff and Nonsense'']]
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** Fate: 9
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** Fate: 99
[[/folder]]
[[/folder]]
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----
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Once upon a time there was a teddy bear who made himself a mouth and a voice of strings and things, and said "'''Status.'''" And this is what saw.
* '''Name: Threadbare'''
* '''Age:''' 5
* '''Jobs:''' \\
Greater Toy Golem Level 9\\
Bear Level 8\\
Ruler Level 4\\
Scout Level 3\\
Tailor Level 8\\
Model Level 2\\
necromancer Level 1\\
Duelist Level 1\\
Animator Level 1\\
Enchanter Level 2\\
Golemist Level 1\\
Smith Level 1
* '''Attributes:'''
** Strength: 79
** Intelligence: 58
** Dexterity: 41
** Charisma: 56
** Perception: 57
** Constitution: 83
** Wisdom: 89
** Agility: 51
** Willpower: 47
** Luck: 53
* '''Pools:'''
** Hit Points: 216 (236)
** Sanity: 147 (167)
** Stamina: 102 (122)
** Moxie: 103 (123)
** Fortune: 110 (130)
* '''Defenses'''
** Armor: 34
** Mental Fortitude: 24
** Endurance: 44
** Cool: 20
** Fate: 9
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* '''Name:''' ????
* '''Age:''' 1 minute
* '''Jobs:''' \\
Greater Toy Golem Level 1
* '''Attributes:'''
** Strength: 4
** Intelligence: 2
** Dexterity: 6
** Charisma: 2
** Perception: 5
** Constitution: 16
** Wisdom: 11
** Agility: 3
** Willpower: 10
** Luck: 5
* '''Pools:'''
** Hit Points: 50
** Sanity: 14
** Stamina: 19
** Moxie: 12
** Fortune: 10
* '''Defenses'''
** Armor: 10
** [[BrainlessBeauty Mental Fortitude:]] 0
** Endurance: 20
** Cool: 20
** Fate: 1
* '''Age:''' 1 minute
* '''Jobs:''' \\
Greater Toy Golem Level 1
* '''Attributes:'''
** Strength: 4
** Intelligence: 2
** Dexterity: 6
** Charisma: 2
** Perception: 5
** Constitution: 16
** Wisdom: 11
** Agility: 3
** Willpower: 10
** Luck: 5
* '''Pools:'''
** Hit Points: 50
** Sanity: 14
** Stamina: 19
** Moxie: 12
** Fortune: 10
* '''Defenses'''
** Armor: 10
** [[BrainlessBeauty Mental Fortitude:]] 0
** Endurance: 20
** Cool: 20
** Fate: 1
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* {{Foreshadowing}}: From page 1.
-->''But alas, the little teddy bear who was now a golem could not speak or even read or write. Not at the beginning. The old man thought that made him a failure. And so the old man made a mistake that would cost him and his loved ones dearly...''
-->''But alas, the little teddy bear who was now a golem could not speak or even read or write. Not at the beginning. The old man thought that made him a failure. And so the old man made a mistake that would cost him and his loved ones dearly...''
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* BadassAdorable: Threadbare slowly develops into one over the course of the book. One of his skills is literally just his ability to be "Adorable - Level 1".
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Once upon a time, there was a teddy bear.
An old man, bent with tragedy but still daring to dream, made him into a thing that could think and feel.
And if the teddy bear could have said "Status", he would have seen the following words...
''Stuff and Nonsense'' is the inaugural book in a LitRPG series whose narrative protagonist is a teddy bear brought to life by a spell inside a magical world where people get jobs and classes and skill levels.
[[BookDumb Initially quite the idiot]], as well as a HeroicMime, Threadbare is adopted by his creator's daughter[[note]]asterisk[[/note]] and taught to be a proper teddy bear, as well as a hero. Then things go horribly wrong.
----
!!Do You Wish to Accept These Tropes? Y/N
* AchievementsInIgnorance:
** Threadbare literally knows nothing about anything. All of his jobs are chosen just to get the annoying words out of his vision. Fortunately, they add up to a pretty awesome collection with surprising synergies with his race(s) as a Greater Toy Golem and Bear.
** Likewise, Caradon didn't know what a Greater Golem actually was. He had no idea what he was unleashing on the world. Fortunately, what he set loose was a teddy bear who loved his little girl.
* AllLovingHero: Threadbare doesn't have a mean bone in his body. He doesn't have ''any'' bones in his body. The first thing he does when he comes to life is try to free a fellow golem that he sees is suffering. From there, he goes on to save the world. A bit. A couple times.
* BearsAreBadNews: One of the only reasons Threadbare survives is that his race is automatically classed as a bear, giving him a high constitution. This lets him survive a Greater Golem's ''ridiculously'' low luck score at creation.
* CatsAreMean: Percival is kind of a stinker. If you're family, he'll love you forever. If you're not, he'll try to murder you. He has his own opinions on who counts as family. And if you straight up murder a mother fucker? Watch out.
* LitRPG: Unapologetically a homage to D&D and its spin-offs, it's quite the franchise.
* MagneticHero: Despite his naivete, Threadbare's unceasing kindness and optimism (and overwhelming cuteness) nets him a lot of friends right from the jump.
----
An old man, bent with tragedy but still daring to dream, made him into a thing that could think and feel.
And if the teddy bear could have said "Status", he would have seen the following words...
''Stuff and Nonsense'' is the inaugural book in a LitRPG series whose narrative protagonist is a teddy bear brought to life by a spell inside a magical world where people get jobs and classes and skill levels.
[[BookDumb Initially quite the idiot]], as well as a HeroicMime, Threadbare is adopted by his creator's daughter[[note]]asterisk[[/note]] and taught to be a proper teddy bear, as well as a hero. Then things go horribly wrong.
----
!!Do You Wish to Accept These Tropes? Y/N
* AchievementsInIgnorance:
** Threadbare literally knows nothing about anything. All of his jobs are chosen just to get the annoying words out of his vision. Fortunately, they add up to a pretty awesome collection with surprising synergies with his race(s) as a Greater Toy Golem and Bear.
** Likewise, Caradon didn't know what a Greater Golem actually was. He had no idea what he was unleashing on the world. Fortunately, what he set loose was a teddy bear who loved his little girl.
* AllLovingHero: Threadbare doesn't have a mean bone in his body. He doesn't have ''any'' bones in his body. The first thing he does when he comes to life is try to free a fellow golem that he sees is suffering. From there, he goes on to save the world. A bit. A couple times.
* BearsAreBadNews: One of the only reasons Threadbare survives is that his race is automatically classed as a bear, giving him a high constitution. This lets him survive a Greater Golem's ''ridiculously'' low luck score at creation.
* CatsAreMean: Percival is kind of a stinker. If you're family, he'll love you forever. If you're not, he'll try to murder you. He has his own opinions on who counts as family. And if you straight up murder a mother fucker? Watch out.
* LitRPG: Unapologetically a homage to D&D and its spin-offs, it's quite the franchise.
* MagneticHero: Despite his naivete, Threadbare's unceasing kindness and optimism (and overwhelming cuteness) nets him a lot of friends right from the jump.
----
