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*
-->'''Pirkle''': Will you come?
-->'''Snob''': Oh, I've already come. Twice. I get off on uniforms.
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* "Next up in the movie..." (''footage of people being shot'') "I said, next up in--" (''footage of people being shot'') "As I was saying..." (''[[RuleOfThree footage of people being shot]]'') "Christ, movie! Stop killing people!"
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-->''''Pirkle''': Have you seen these cartoons? Programs motivated to lead your child into crime, into sex, into murder?

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-->''''Pirkle''': -->'''Pirkle''': Have you seen these cartoons? Programs motivated to lead your child into crime, into sex, into murder?
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* "Let's hear it for the Locust Grove Baptist Church. It's much better than the Death of the Firstborn Baptist Church."
* "I think the fans of this film are gonna love it when angry talk radio becomes a thing!"
* "Pirkle's audience is mostly made up of ''[[ComicStrip/TheFarSide Far Side]]'' characters."
* After Pirkle's anti-Communism scare tactics:
-->'''Pirkle''': Do these things seem far-fetched to you?
-->'''Snob''': '''''YES!'''''
*
-->'''Pirkle''': We, too, will be on the same schedule of every Communist nation on earth. You will be at work by 5:00 in the morning.
-->'''Snob''': What? I gotta be at work at ''5 AM''? No one gets up that early!
*"Yep, sex education. Because teaching about the safe way to have sex is exactly the same as saying, 'hey kids, I want you all to fuck.'"
*
-->'''Snob''': have the feeling Gary and Phil from ''Deception of a Generation'' may be in this audience. Because next on the evil roster is cartoons.
-->''''Pirkle''': Have you seen these cartoons? Programs motivated to lead your child into crime, into sex, into murder?
-->'''Snob''': Okay, so maybe I felt like strangling someone after the premiere of ''WesternAnimation/TheBrothersGrunt''. But it wasn't because it was a cartoon, it was because [[TakeThat it was fucking awful]]!
*
-->'''Pirkle''': Magazines, newspaper, and television are all trying to make extramarital relations appear all right.
-->'''Snob''': Yes, because when it's on TV, that means they're saying the act is good. I saw a guy killed on an episode of ''Series/CriminalMinds'' the other night. [[InsaneTrollLogic That means the show is very pro-murder.]]
*
-->'''Pirkle''': In this torture, a man is kept away from water for two to three days, then salt poured into his mouth. He's made to endure unthinkable torture.
-->'''Snob''': Meh, it's like eating a bowl of the hot and sour soup from P. F. Chang's. You get used to it after a while.
*
-->'''Pirkle''': We mustn't just come on Sunday morning, but on Sunday night as well.
-->'''Snob''': Bullshit! Sunday night's when ''WesternAnimation/BobsBurgers'' is on!

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* "John 11:36 is an accurate review of His reaction to these movies!" Not only is [[StealthPun this verse "Jesus wept"]], this is said over Christ doing a FacePalm.

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* "John 11:36 is an accurate "Estus Pirkle, despite having a name that sounds like the obvious villain on every episode of ''Series/InTheHeatOfTheNight'', was a Baptist minister from Mississippi. ''Shocking!''"
* "The movie being named after a [[Literature/TheBible Bible]] verse makes sense. I think John 11:35 pretty much sums up Jesus's
review of His reaction to all these movies!" films." Not only is [[StealthPun [[GeniusBonus this verse "Jesus wept"]], this is said over Christ doing a FacePalm.
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[[/folder]]

[[folder:Death Wish II]]
* The Snob saying that nothing happened is Bronson speech for he let a man he cornered in an alley live.
* When the Snob talks of how Bronson's character's daughter ultimately meets her demise.
-->'''Snob:''' And given how the character of Carol went through an unspeakable horror in the first film, I'm sure this movie will treat her with the utmost respect.
-->''(Carol jumps through a window and get impaled on a metal fence)''
-->'''Snob:''' See? I'm sure she died a quick death, being impaled on a fence!
* "Why the hell is that guy going to heaven?!"
* "And then Bronson shot him for public drunkiness...and for not sharing."
* Detective Ochoa's demise also brings a few chuckles.
-->'''Snob:''' They better have a good reason for bringing Ochoa back for this.
-->''(Ochoa dies in gunfight)''
-->'''Snob:''' And immediately killing him off isn't a good reason!
* "Then it's settled! Eighties's boomboxes, while gigantic, are not big enough to stop a bullet! The debate is over!"
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-->'''Snob''': He's jealous that's she's gonna fuck a fish- '''[[NotMakingThisUpDisclaimer that's a thing that just happened]]'''!
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[[/folder]]

[[folder:If Footmen Tire You What Will Horses Do?]]
*"John 11:36 is an accurate review of His reaction to these movies!" Not only is [[StealthPun this verse "Jesus wept"]], this is said over Christ doing a FacePalm.
*The constant bafflement at the violence, earning comparisons to ''I Spit on Your Grave'' and ''Beware! Children at Play''.

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* When Clay asks Amber how many sexual partners she's had in the past ten years, Brad says, "[[TheBible Matthew, Mark, Luke, John,]] and FUCK OFF WITH THAT QUESTION!"

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* "Are all current and former deejays named Brad complete dickheads?"[[note]]Brad Jones, who plays the Snob, used to be a deejay.[[/note]]
* When Clay asks Amber how many sexual partners she's had in the past ten years, Brad says, "[[TheBible "[[Literature/TheBible Matthew, Mark, Luke, John,]] and FUCK OFF WITH THAT QUESTION!"
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* Comparing two characters to [[Webvideo/TheNostalgiaCritic Doug and Tamara]], and wondering why Tamara is absence.

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* Comparing two characters to [[Webvideo/TheNostalgiaCritic Doug and Tamara]], and wondering why Tamara Malcolm is absence.absent.
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[[/folder]]


[[folder:Second Glance]]
*[[InterruptingMeme "Hey Scotty!"]]
*Comparing two characters to [[Webvideo/TheNostalgiaCritic Doug and Tamara]], and wondering why Tamara is absence.
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** Another CallBack: [[Film/FridayThe13thPartVITheNewBlood "stab stab stab jail end credits"]].

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** Another CallBack: [[Film/FridayThe13thPartVITheNewBlood [[Film/FridayThe13thPartVIJasonLives "stab stab stab jail end credits"]].
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** Another CallBack: [[Film/FridayThe13thPartVITheNewBlood "stab stab stab jail end credits"]].

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* "If I wanted a song about milkshake, I'll stick to ''Can't Stop the Music''... Because you're probably holding a gun to my head asking for my choice."

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* "If I wanted a song about milkshake, I'll stick to ''Can't Stop the Music''... Because you're probably holding clearly there's a gun to my head asking for my choice."head, forcing me to make this choice!"


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[[/folder]]

[[folder:War Room]]
* Miss Clara bemoaning teenage boys with saggy pants.
-->'''Miss Clara:''' I'm tired of seeing all these young boys with sloppy hair and pants around their knees. A man wears his pants around his waist.
-->'''Snob:''' That's not how the line goes! The line goes [[CallBack "Goofy Toofie, pick up your pants!"]]
* "Miss Clara is basically a laugh-track character, in that everything she says can instantly be followed with a studio reaction."
-->'''Miss Clara:''' It's my sittin' room.
-->'''Elizabeth:''' Hm. What do you do in here?
-->'''Miss Clara:''' Mainly sit.
-->''(Audience laughs)''
-->'''Miss Clara:''' Can't do nothin' with my phone but call folks. Must be a dumbphone.
-->''(Audience laughs)''
-->'''Snob:''' ''(Fake laughs)'' Ugh, this makes Series/MamasFamily look like Series/{{Frasier}}.
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-->'''Snob''': Anyway, it's their pillow Shloofy's birthday- '''[[ARareSentence that was a sentence I just said]]'''!

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-->'''Snob''': Anyway, it's It's their pillow Shloofy's birthday- '''[[ARareSentence that was that's a sentence I just said]]'''!
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* The Snob's increasing frustration over the film's excruciating insistence in beating the "Toofie's pants keep falling down" joke into the groun
"I will STAPLE them to your GODDAMN ASS!!!"

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* The Snob's increasing frustration over the film's excruciating insistence in beating the "Toofie's pants keep falling down" joke into the groun
"I
ground:
-->'''Snob''': I
will STAPLE ''staple'' them to your GODDAMN ASS!!!"ASS!!!



"It's their pillow Shloofy's birthday-THAT WAS A SENTENCE I JUST SAID."

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"It's -->'''Snob''': Anyway, it's their pillow Shloofy's birthday-THAT WAS A SENTENCE birthday- '''[[ARareSentence that was a sentence I JUST SAID." just said]]'''!
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* The Snob's increasing frustration over the film's excruciating insistence in beating the "Toofie's pants keep falling down" joke into the groun
"I will STAPLE them to your GODDAMN ASS!!!"
*Also his bewilderment at the nature of the film's plot that he has to relay
"It's their pillow Shloofy's birthday-THAT WAS A SENTENCE I JUST SAID."
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[[/folder]]

[[folder:The Oogieloves in The Big Balloon Adventure]]
* Again, the Snob's sheer hatred for the movie, of the EnragedByIdiocy in this case, leads to plenty of laughter.
* The title card, featuring a {{Chibi}} Snob angry at the Oogieloves.
*"If I wanted a song about milkshake, I'll stick to ''Can't Stop the Music''... Because you're probably holding a gun to my head asking for my choice."
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* [[NamesTheSame Brad constantly compares Brad]] to a serial killer/creep.

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* [[NamesTheSame Brad constantly compares Brad]] Clay Walsh [[UnfortunateImplications to a serial killer/creep.]]
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* The sad saga of Kung Tai Ted continues as he has now fallen out of his wheelchair, trying to reach for a can Mountain Dew only to find that it's empty.

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* The sad saga of Kung Tai Ted continues as he has now fallen out of his wheelchair, wheelchair and is trying to reach for a can of Mountain Dew only to find that it's empty.
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* The sad saga of Kung Tai Ted continues as he has now fallen out of his wheelchair, trying to reach for a can Mountain Dew only to find that it's empty.
-->'''Snob:''' Goddammit! Stop making me sad!
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[[/folder]]


[[folder:Zombie 3]]
* The intro, recapping all other Zombie movies with Snob getting annoyed with each one.
* "And then she became the Joker!"

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* When Clay asks Amber how many sexual partners she's had in the past ten years, Brad says, "Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, and FUCK OFF WITH THAT QUESTION!"

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* When Clay asks Amber how many sexual partners she's had in the past ten years, Brad says, "Matthew, "[[TheBible Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, John,]] and FUCK OFF WITH THAT QUESTION!"


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[[/folder]]

[[folder:Enter the Ninja]]
* "Good! Ninjas killing people! We're back to normal! Cause I guess that's normal for me..."
* The CallBack to ''Film/TheApple''.
* In a scene where two ninjas jump down a waterfall:
-->'''White ninja''': I didn't think this throooough! The water is gonna be very hard to clean out of white!\\
'''Black ninja''': I don't have that probleeeeem!
* Realizing one guy is the grandpa from ''Film/SilentNightDeadlyNight''.
* Adding a comedic bump once the screen goes black.
* The infamous [[ChewingTheScenery "worst death ever"]] brings back Brad's character dying the same way in ''WebVideo/NinjaTheMissionForce''.
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* After one of the (Very) awkward dates in the film, [[OutOfCharacterMoment Snob takes off his glasses, signaling this is Brad Jones talking]], telling of how he went on a bad date with a girl years ago where they saw the ThatDarnCat remake. He says that was the better date.

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* After one of the (Very) awkward dates in the film, [[OutOfCharacterMoment Snob takes off his glasses, signaling this is Brad Jones talking]], telling of how he went on a bad date with a girl years ago where they saw [[TakeThat the ThatDarnCat remake.That]] [[ThatDarnCat Darn Cat! remake]]. He says that was the better date.
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* After one of the (Very) awkward dates in the film, [[OutOfCharacterMoment Snob takes off his glasses, signaling this is Brad Jones talking]], telling of how he went on a bad date with a girl years ago where he saw the ThatDarnCat remake. He says that was the better date.
* The two times Snob in confusion asks what kind of dates Brad was on is pitch perfect.
* Snob's reaction to Clay's snarky remark after hearing that Amber broke up with her ex, who was abusive.

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* After one of the (Very) awkward dates in the film, [[OutOfCharacterMoment Snob takes off his glasses, signaling this is Brad Jones talking]], telling of how he went on a bad date with a girl years ago where he they saw the ThatDarnCat remake. He says that was the better date.
* The *The two times Snob in confusion asks what kind of dates Brad was on is pitch perfect.
* Snob's *Snob's reaction to Clay's snarky remark after hearing that Amber broke up with her ex, who was abusive.
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* After one of the (Very) awkward dates in the film, [[OutOfCharacterMoment Snob takes off his glasses, signaling this is Brad Jones talking]], telling of how he went on a bad date with a girl years ago where he saw the ThatDarnCat remake. He says that was the better date.
*The two times Snob in confusion asks what kind of dates Brad was on is pitch perfect.
*Snob's reaction to Clay's snarky remark after hearing that Amber broke up with her ex, who was abusive.
-->'''Snob:''' So she went from a physically abusive relationship... to a emotionally abusive one. :just sighs in disbelief:
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* When Clay asks Amber how many sexual partners she's had in the past ten years, Brad says, "Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, and FUCK OFF WITH THAT QUESTION!"
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*The Snob's sheer hatred for this movie is both this, and [[Awesome/TheCinemaSnob pretty awesome.]]
*[[NamesTheSame Brad constantly compares Brad]] to a serial killer/creep.
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[[Funny/TheCinemaSnob All]] | [[Funny/TheCinemaSnob2007To2009Episodes 2007-09]] | [[Funny/TheCinemaSnob2010Episodes 2010]] | [[Funny/TheCinemaSnob2011Episodes 2011]] | [[Funny/TheCinemaSnob2012Episodes 2012]] | [[Funny/TheCinemaSnob2013Episodes 2013]] | [[Funny/TheCinemaSnob2014Episodes 2014]] | [[Funny/TheCinemaSnob2015Episodes 2015]] | '''2016'''
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[[foldercontrol]]

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[[folder:Old Fashioned]]
[[/folder]]

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