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** First off, the Witch is the new MrBNatural of the 21st Century. Everything she does and says is so over-the-top quirky, the comedy comes from her ''trying'' to be kooky but coming off as an idiotic, creepy ditz.
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Changed line(s) 300,309 (click to see context) from:
* "Oh hi, Mark!" "Oh hi, Denny!" "Oh hi, Movie Theater!" [[RunningGag "Oh hi, Sidewalk!" "Oh hi, Newspaper!" "Oh hi, Entrance!"]] [[OverlyLongGag "Oh hi, Michelle!" "Oh hi, Lisa!" "Oh hi, Denny!" "Oh hi, Underwear Story!" "Oh hi, Answering Machine!" "Oh hi, Mark, again!" "Oh hi, Doggie!" "Oh hi, Lisa!" "Oh hi, Building!" "Oh hi, Embarcadero!" "Oh hi, Darkness!" "Oh hi, Gun Barrel!" "Oh hi, Mark!" "Oh hi, Mark! Hi, Denny! Hi, Lisa!]] [[spoiler: I'm dead, you know...]]"
* Their various interpretations of what the English-challenged Johnny is saying.
--> Johnny: Hello Michelle, I hert (heard) you.
--> Bill: I hurt you by showing you my face.
* Johnny: Cheep cheep cheep cheeeep! Kevin: [[ArrestedDevelopment Ko-ka-ko ko-ka-ko!]]
* This bit during one of the MANY unneeded scenes.
--> Bill: We have fully descended into madness gentlemen and we're not even at the one hour mark.
--> Kevin: [[GoMadFromTheRevelation I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!]]
--> Mike: Really? Cheep cheep cheep Chicken Kevin.
* Their various interpretations of what the English-challenged Johnny is saying.
--> Johnny: Hello Michelle, I hert (heard) you.
--> Bill: I hurt you by showing you my face.
* Johnny: Cheep cheep cheep cheeeep! Kevin: [[ArrestedDevelopment Ko-ka-ko ko-ka-ko!]]
* This bit during one of the MANY unneeded scenes.
--> Bill: We have fully descended into madness gentlemen and we're not even at the one hour mark.
--> Kevin: [[GoMadFromTheRevelation I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!]]
--> Mike: Really? Cheep cheep cheep Chicken Kevin.
to:
-->'''Kevin:''' DISCONNECT! ''(electric shock)'' DISCONNECT! ''(electric shock)'' DISCONNECT! ''(electric shock)''
* CrowningMusicOfAwesome. Kevin and Bill singing "There's a Hole in My Bucket", and [[SanitySlippage taking it too far]].
-->'''Mike:''' [[AnythingButThat No, NOT HAMBONE!]]
* {{Earworm}}: The mention of Loverboy gives Mike and an earworm of ''Working For the Weekend''.
* EpilepticTrees: Is the film secretly a sly dadaist joke? Does Mark possess the God-like power to hear the film's soundtrack? Will [[spoiler:Johnny come back as a zombie in a sequel entitled ''The Tomb''?]]
* {{Melodrama}}: The Disembaudio sequences during the movie's sex scenes. This movie manages to destroy the lives of Disembaudio and all of his friends and family.
** Though with the exception of Dis's Grandmother and G-Dimes, they were all pretty horrible people and kinda deserved it.
* RunningGag: They riff on the football motif, mention the mom's cancer everytime she is mentioned or shown, and have Johnny saying "Oh hi" to everything. There's more.
** "Oh hi, Mark!" "Oh hi, Denny!" "Oh hi, Movie Theater!" [[RunningGag "Oh hi, Sidewalk!" "Oh hi, Newspaper!" "Oh hi, Entrance!"]] [[OverlyLongGag "Oh hi, Michelle!" "Oh hi, Lisa!" "Oh hi, Denny!" "Oh hi, Underwear Story!" "Oh hi, Answering Machine!" "Oh hi, Mark, again!" "Oh hi, Doggie!" "Oh hi, Lisa!" "Oh hi, Building!" "Oh hi, Embarcadero!" "Oh hi, Darkness!" "Oh hi, Gun Barrel!" "Oh hi, Mark!" "Oh hi, Mark! Hi, Denny! Hi, Lisa!]] [[spoiler: I'm dead, you know...]]"
*
--> Johnny: Hello Michelle, I hert (heard) you.
--> Bill: I hurt you by showing you my face.
* Johnny: Cheep cheep cheep cheeeep! Kevin: [[ArrestedDevelopment Ko-ka-ko ko-ka-ko!]]
* This bit during
--> Bill:
-->'''Bill:''' We have fully descended into
--> Mike: Really? Cheep cheep cheep
-->'''Mike:''' Oh, you're just a little chicken, Kevin. [-CHEEP CHEEP CHEEP-]! Chicken Kevin.
** See Crowning Music of Awesome above.
* TakeThat: Kevin compares Tommy Wiseau's multiple production credits as producer, writer, director, and actor as a modern MNightShyamalan. Mike tells Kevin not to insult Tommy Wiseau with that comparison.
** The riff about of Lisa and her friends discussing which one of them is [[{{Twilight}} Edward Cullen's]] wife
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-->'''Kevin''': * gasps* How ''dare'' you, sir?!
to:
-->'''Kevin''': * gasps* ''(gasps)'' How ''dare'' you, sir?!
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* During Smith's death scene:
-->'''All (as the Smith clones are staring to explode, in unison)''': Turn aroouunnnnd,&# 65279; briiiiiiight eyyeess.
-->'''All (as the Smith clones are staring to explode, in unison)''': Turn aroouunnnnd,&# 65279; briiiiiiight eyyeess.
to:
-->'''All (as
-->'''Bill''': He's having a total eclipse of the heart!
** And then during his death:
--->'''All''': ''(as the Smith clones are staring to explode, in
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-->'''Chad Vader:''' Ah, he's using the Jedi Tongue Technique. His training is now complete.
to:
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* as Rose, Ruth, and Cal admire the Titanic
-->'''Ruth''': So this is the ship they say is unsinkable.
-->'''Cal''': It ''is'' unsinkable. God Himself could not sink this ship.
-->''[a deckhand calls for Cal]''
-->'''Deckhand''': Sir! Sir!
-->'''Bill [as Deckhand]''': Sir, the captain has asked if you would ''please'' stop foreshadowing!
-->''[later]''
-->'''Jack''': We're the luckiest sons of bitches in the world, you know that?!
-->'''Bill''': Aw, man,[[JamesCameron Cameron's]] beyond foreshadowing now. He is ''five''-shadowing!
-->'''Ruth''': So this is the ship they say is unsinkable.
-->'''Cal''': It ''is'' unsinkable. God Himself could not sink this ship.
-->''[a deckhand calls for Cal]''
-->'''Deckhand''': Sir! Sir!
-->'''Bill [as Deckhand]''': Sir, the captain has asked if you would ''please'' stop foreshadowing!
-->''[later]''
-->'''Jack''': We're the luckiest sons of bitches in the world, you know that?!
-->'''Bill''': Aw, man,[[JamesCameron Cameron's]] beyond foreshadowing now. He is ''five''-shadowing!
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*'''Kevin:''' 6-legged, anteater horses.\\
'''Mike:''' George Lucas slowly nods his silent approval.
'''Mike:''' George Lucas slowly nods his silent approval.
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* ''[An old Earth Kingdom man leads Aang to a shed.]]''
to:
* ''[An old Earth Kingdom man leads Aang to a shed.]]'']''
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Changed line(s) 188,190 (click to see context) from:
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-->'''Old Man:''' These are all tools related to bending.
-->'''Kevin:''' Well Harpo's a tool and he's related to a bender.
-->'''Bill:''' Lock him in the shed!
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Changed line(s) 182,184 (click to see context) from:
--> '''Aang''': We were forced under the water of the ocean.
--> '''Kevin''': The water of the ocean, much like the air of the sky or the flame of the fire.
to:
-->
'''Kevin''': The water of the ocean, much like the air of the sky or the flame of the fire.
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Changed line(s) 182 (click to see context) from:
* --> '''Aang''': We were forced under the water of the ocean.
to:
--> '''Aang''': We were forced under the water of the ocean.
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* Humming "Yakkity Sax" while Edward runs up the hill with Bella at superspeed.
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--> '''Kevin''': The water of the ocean, much like the air of the sky or the flame of the fire.
* And of course, the obligatory [[HeyItsThatGuy Harpo]] joke
--> '''Mike''': Wait, that's the...I'm ashamed to know this, but that's the Harpo guy from {{Twilight}} isn't he?
--> '''Bill''': I'm ashamed to confirm, but yes.
--> '''Mike''': Our shame is great.
Deleted line(s) 1158,1164 (click to see context) :
!!''Film/TheLastAirbender''
--> '''Aang''': We were forced under the water of the ocean.
--> '''Kevin''': The water of the ocean, much like the air of the sky or the flame of the fire.
* And of course, the obligatory [[HeyItsThatGuy Harpo]] joke
--> '''Mike''': Wait, that's the...I'm ashamed to know this, but that's the Harpo guy from {{Twilight}} isn't he?
--> '''Bill''': I'm ashamed to confirm, but yes.
--> '''Mike''': Our shame is great.
--> '''Aang''': We were forced under the water of the ocean.
--> '''Kevin''': The water of the ocean, much like the air of the sky or the flame of the fire.
* And of course, the obligatory [[HeyItsThatGuy Harpo]] joke
--> '''Mike''': Wait, that's the...I'm ashamed to know this, but that's the Harpo guy from {{Twilight}} isn't he?
--> '''Bill''': I'm ashamed to confirm, but yes.
--> '''Mike''': Our shame is great.
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Changed line(s) 1161 (click to see context) from:
And of course, the obligatory [[HeyItsThatGuy Harpo]] joke
to:
* And of course, the obligatory [[HeyItsThatGuy Harpo]] joke
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!!''Film/TheLastAirbender''
--> '''Aang''': We were forced under the water of the ocean.
--> '''Kevin''': The water of the ocean, much like the air of the sky or the flame of the fire.
And of course, the obligatory [[HeyItsThatGuy Harpo]] joke
--> '''Mike''': Wait, that's the...I'm ashamed to know this, but that's the Harpo guy from {{Twilight}} isn't he?
--> '''Bill''': I'm ashamed to confirm, but yes.
--> '''Mike''': Our shame is great.
--> '''Aang''': We were forced under the water of the ocean.
--> '''Kevin''': The water of the ocean, much like the air of the sky or the flame of the fire.
And of course, the obligatory [[HeyItsThatGuy Harpo]] joke
--> '''Mike''': Wait, that's the...I'm ashamed to know this, but that's the Harpo guy from {{Twilight}} isn't he?
--> '''Bill''': I'm ashamed to confirm, but yes.
--> '''Mike''': Our shame is great.
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Changed line(s) 178,180 (click to see context) from:
to:
-->'''Zuko:''' You seem like a smart boy.
-->'''Bill:''' I LIKE TURTLES!
-->'''Kevin:''' Okay, maybe not...
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Changed line(s) 172,175 (click to see context) from:
'''Bill:''' ''[sobs harder]'' Oh dammit! Dammit!\\
to:
'''Bill:''' ''[sobs harder]'' Oh dammit! Dammit!\\
Dammit!
* ''[A soldier walks up and whispers to Zhao, played by Aasif Mandvi]''
--> '''Mike:''' ''[as soldier]'' Sir, I just checked. The whole [[TheDailyShow Daily Show]] crew is making fun of you, even John Oliver.\\
'''Kevin:''' ''[as Mandvi]'' Wha- Oliver?! But he was in the freakin' [[TheLoveGuru Love Guru]]!\\
'''Mike:''' Love Guru has more than double our [[RottenTomatoes tomato meter ranking]], sir.\\
'''Kevin:''' DAMMIT!
* ''[A soldier walks up and whispers to Zhao, played by Aasif Mandvi]''
--> '''Mike:''' ''[as soldier]'' Sir, I just checked. The whole [[TheDailyShow Daily Show]] crew is making fun of you, even John Oliver.\\
'''Kevin:''' ''[as Mandvi]'' Wha- Oliver?! But he was in the freakin' [[TheLoveGuru Love Guru]]!\\
'''Mike:''' Love Guru has more than double our [[RottenTomatoes tomato meter ranking]], sir.\\
'''Kevin:''' DAMMIT!
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!!''[[TheLastAirbender The Last Airbender]]''
*'''Iroh:''' When you wake we'll have tea together before we start the engines, eh?\\
'''Bill:''' [[TheRoom Let's go get something to eat, HUUUUUUH?]]
*'''Mike:''' ''[as Katara]'' Just F.Y.I., that big flying panda thing of yours... he drowned.\\
'''Bill:''' ''[as Aang sobbing]''\\
'''Mike:''' And your flying monkey cat.\\
'''Bill:''' Yes?\\
'''Mike:''' He lived.\\
'''Bill:''' ''[sobs harder]'' Oh dammit! Dammit!\\
*'''Iroh:''' When you wake we'll have tea together before we start the engines, eh?\\
'''Bill:''' [[TheRoom Let's go get something to eat, HUUUUUUH?]]
*'''Mike:''' ''[as Katara]'' Just F.Y.I., that big flying panda thing of yours... he drowned.\\
'''Bill:''' ''[as Aang sobbing]''\\
'''Mike:''' And your flying monkey cat.\\
'''Bill:''' Yes?\\
'''Mike:''' He lived.\\
'''Bill:''' ''[sobs harder]'' Oh dammit! Dammit!\\
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* After Jake prays to the Great Mother for aid.
-->Neytiri: The Great Mother does not take sides.
-->Mike (as Neytiri): -she's an amoral psychopath.
-->Neytiri: The Great Mother does not take sides.
-->Mike (as Neytiri): -she's an amoral psychopath.
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Changed line(s) 1069 (click to see context) from:
-->''Bill:'' Die die die die d-death death death d-diediediedie!
to:
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*''[movie opens up with a cloudy sky]''
-->'''Kevin''' [[TheSimpsons The Haaaappeniiiiing....]]
-->''Bill:'' Die die die die d-death death death d-diediediedie!
* ''[A construction worker has fallen to his death]''
-->'''Worker:''' David?
-->'''Mike:''' David Blaine? Are we rid of you at last?
-->'''Kevin''' [[TheSimpsons The Haaaappeniiiiing....]]
-->''Bill:'' Die die die die d-death death death d-diediediedie!
* ''[A construction worker has fallen to his death]''
-->'''Worker:''' David?
-->'''Mike:''' David Blaine? Are we rid of you at last?
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* The camera is focused on a set of TVs in a radio store, with one of them playing an episode of SpongebobSquarepants
to:
* The camera is focused on a set of TVs [=TVs=] in a radio store, with one of them playing an episode of SpongebobSquarepants
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** (As John Connor is stranded on a crashed and sinking helicopter) "He's wondering how he can blame ''this'' on the lighting guy." "Oh, good for you, you broke my helicopter - and how was it?"
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!!''Fast and Furious 2009''
--> "This movie does make a good point, though: Vroom."
--> "This movie does make a good point, though: Vroom."
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-->'''Bill:''' The most kick-ass cello solo that involves the phrase "Yo-Yo Ma's drunk again."
* During Chad's first appearence.
* During Chad's first appearence.
to:
-->'''Bill:''' The most kick-ass cello solo that involves doesn't involve the phrase "Yo-Yo Ma's drunk again."
**Later, after the song.
--->'''Chad:''' Oh let's see, um you miss free period workout yesterday to audition for some heinous musical, and now suddenly people are confessing. Yeah Zeke, Zeke is baking. Crème brûlée.
--->'''Troy:''' Oh. What's that?
--->'''Zeke:''' Oh, it's a creamy custard-like filling with a caramelized surface, it's really satisfying.
--->'''Troy:''' Yeah, cool.
--->'''Chad:''' Shut up, Zeke!
--->'''Bill:''' Zeke would blind him with his pastry torch the very next day.
* During Chad's firstappearence.appearance.
**Later, after the song.
--->'''Chad:''' Oh let's see, um you miss free period workout yesterday to audition for some heinous musical, and now suddenly people are confessing. Yeah Zeke, Zeke is baking. Crème brûlée.
--->'''Troy:''' Oh. What's that?
--->'''Zeke:''' Oh, it's a creamy custard-like filling with a caramelized surface, it's really satisfying.
--->'''Troy:''' Yeah, cool.
--->'''Chad:''' Shut up, Zeke!
--->'''Bill:''' Zeke would blind him with his pastry torch the very next day.
* During Chad's first
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* "Help!" - A message from the film's editor. Poor bastard never had a chance.
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--> '''Kevin:''' [[{{Fame}} SHAME!]] I wanna look like a douche bag!
to:
--> '''Kevin:''' '''Bill:''' [[{{Fame}} SHAME!]] I wanna look like a douche bag!
--> *CRASH!*
--> '''Mike:''' And he was beaten by the AvenueQ puppets.
* Troy's reaction after Gabrielle volunteers to audition, completely with wheezing.
* ''Stick To The Status Quo''
-->'''Kevin:''' The Disney Channel. High schooler's repressed secrets are "I like rap" instead of "Dissecting a fetal pig gave me a boner".
-->'''Bill:''' The most kick-ass cello solo that involves the phrase "Yo-Yo Ma's drunk again."
* During Chad's first appearence.
-->'''Chad to Troy:''' Because in two weeks we're going to the championships. With you leading us [[ToyStory to infinity and beyond]].
-->'''Bill:''' And Disney finally sues Disney.
--> *CRASH!*
--> '''Mike:''' And he was beaten by the AvenueQ puppets.
* Troy's reaction after Gabrielle volunteers to audition, completely with wheezing.
* ''Stick To The Status Quo''
-->'''Kevin:''' The Disney Channel. High schooler's repressed secrets are "I like rap" instead of "Dissecting a fetal pig gave me a boner".
-->'''Bill:''' The most kick-ass cello solo that involves the phrase "Yo-Yo Ma's drunk again."
* During Chad's first appearence.
-->'''Chad to Troy:''' Because in two weeks we're going to the championships. With you leading us [[ToyStory to infinity and beyond]].
-->'''Bill:''' And Disney finally sues Disney.
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* Absolutely [[EnsembleDarkhorse EVERYTHING]] regarding the unfortunately named Porkins.
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* From ''Magically Disappearing Money'':
** The jokes about the sale on breaded zucchini.
** Any joke about the witch's dark plans, culminating in "Join me in the dark abyss of savings!"
** When the cat from the witch's purse [[WhatHappenedToTheMouse disappears]]: "I can haz freedom?"
* From ''Flying Stewardess'':
** "The captain thanks you for keeping the plane [[SnakesOnAPlane snake-free]]."
** "Hi, Bob Executive. Which way is business?"
* From ''Drawing For Beginners - The Rectangle'':
** The constant jokes about the extremely basic subject matter. "Wait, I haven't seen how ''paper'' works!"
** When drawing a little boy looking out a window to see it's raining oddly-shaped raindrops: "It's raining nooses! The universe is telling Willy to stop being a wuss and go for it!"
* From ''Cops - Who Needs Them?''
** "Just don't sit on the DRUG-SNIFFING HAMSTER!" ''Wheeeeee!''
** The jokes about the sale on breaded zucchini.
** Any joke about the witch's dark plans, culminating in "Join me in the dark abyss of savings!"
** When the cat from the witch's purse [[WhatHappenedToTheMouse disappears]]: "I can haz freedom?"
* From ''Flying Stewardess'':
** "The captain thanks you for keeping the plane [[SnakesOnAPlane snake-free]]."
** "Hi, Bob Executive. Which way is business?"
* From ''Drawing For Beginners - The Rectangle'':
** The constant jokes about the extremely basic subject matter. "Wait, I haven't seen how ''paper'' works!"
** When drawing a little boy looking out a window to see it's raining oddly-shaped raindrops: "It's raining nooses! The universe is telling Willy to stop being a wuss and go for it!"
* From ''Cops - Who Needs Them?''
** "Just don't sit on the DRUG-SNIFFING HAMSTER!" ''Wheeeeee!''
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!!StarWars I: ThePhantomMenace''
to:
Changed line(s) 169 (click to see context) from:
!!StarWars II: AttackOfTheClones''
to:
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!!''StarWars III: Revenge of the Sith''
to:
!!StarWars I: ThePhantomMenace''
* This exchange:
-->'''Mike:''' R-4 is the Windows ME of the Astromech droids.
-->'''Kevin:''' Form a nerdier sentence! No, don't try! You can't!
!!StarWars II: AttackOfTheClones''
* When Anakin kisses Padme:
-->'''Chad Vader:''' Ah, he's using the Jedi Tongue Technique. His training is now complete.
* As [=C3PO and R2D2=] watch their marriage.
-->'''Mike (as [=C3PO=]):''' Someday that will be you and me, R2, as soon as they get rid of that silly law.
!!''StarWars III:Revenge of the Sith''RevengeOfTheSith''
* This exchange:
-->'''Mike:''' R-4 is the Windows ME of the Astromech droids.
-->'''Kevin:''' Form a nerdier sentence! No, don't try! You can't!
!!StarWars II: AttackOfTheClones''
* When Anakin kisses Padme:
-->'''Chad Vader:''' Ah, he's using the Jedi Tongue Technique. His training is now complete.
* As [=C3PO and R2D2=] watch their marriage.
-->'''Mike (as [=C3PO=]):''' Someday that will be you and me, R2, as soon as they get rid of that silly law.
!!''StarWars III:
