History Funny / Matilda

'''Matilda:''' That's a very cute dog you have, Mrs Oakleaf. May play with him sometime?\\

* When Amanda Thripp is Hammer Thrown over the fence, some students can't help but commend Trunchbull's technique!
-->'''Hortensia:''' Good loft!\\
'''Boy:''' Excellent release!

** When Matilda asks her father to buy her a book, he gives her a box of matches and tells her she can read what it says on that before he leaves while chuckling at his own joke. There's a brief pause, and then:

-->'''Mr Wormwood:''' Hi, Mrs Oakleaf. Out walking the dog?\\

-->'''Mr Wormwood:''' My daughter's not going to any idiotic university! The only thing you pick up there is bad habits!\\

'''Matilda:''' That's a very cute dog you have, Mrs Oakleaf. May play with it sometime?\\

''(The dog barks and then growls.)''

** Steady on,” the boy said. (Equivalent to "Calm down!" Or "Take it easy!) “I mean, dash it all, Headmistress.”

--->'''Harry:''' From now on, this family does exactly what I say... [[PunctuatedForEmphasis WHEN! EXACTLY! WHEN! DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment I SAY IT!]]\\

** Also, this bit after Zinnia manages to get the hat off:
--->'''Harry:''' From now on, this family does exactly what I say [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment WHEN EXACTLY WHEN I SAY IT!]]\\

** Also, the bit with peroxide in the hair tonic, leading to the page image.
--->'''Harry:''' Lovekins, where's my breakfast?\\
'''Zinnia:''' Here we are, my heartstrings. ''(sees Harry's hair)'' WAAUGH! ''(throws two bowls of cereal in the air)'' Snickerdoodle, what did you ''do'' to your hair?\\
'''Harry:''' My hair...?! ''(goes to the mirror and sees his now-bleached hair)'' '''[[TheScream AAAAAAAARRRRRGH!]]''' ''([[FaceFault falls over sideways]])''
** Then, there's the fact that the parents are too stupid to put two and two together and deduce that Matilda may have played pranks on them.
*** Mr. Wormwood was a jerk to Matilda the night before. His bathroom has a bottle of peroxide and the hair oil is purple and made with violets. He never once considers that someone may have put peroxide in the bottle or notice the color of the "oil" may be lighter.
*** Mr. Wormwood has just showed his son how to "Super Super-Glue" a bumper to a car... then berates Matilda when she calls him out on his fraud. Rather than considering that "Matilda got back at me by putting glue in my hat", he and his wife come up with weirdness involving head-swelling or hair/hat-fiber-fusion.
* This exchange when Harry catches Matilda reading while he wants the family watching television together.

* At the end of the movie, Matilda is having tea with Miss Honey when the Wormwoods come rushing up because they're fleeing the country to escape the FBI. Zinnia grabs Matilda and starts heading for the car...but even though the authorities are coming for them that very moment, she still takes the time to dump a plate of cookies into her purse by quite literally snatching the plate from Miss Honey.
* Crossing over with Fridge Brilliance, the Wormwoods plan to escape the FBI's jurisdiction by moving to...Guam. A ''U.S. territory.'' DidntThinkThisThrough indeed.

* The scene where Bruce Bogtrotter finishes eating the cake gets its own song in the musical. The music as he finishes the cake is the SugarWiki/MomentOfAwesome of a [[SugarWiki/AwesomeMusic very good song.]]
* From the musical, we have Agatha Trunchball's little... digression in the middle of 'The Smell of Rebellion'. Up till this point she's been singing about how she intends to weed out rebellious students from the school, and then suddenly she starts singing this. Full warning, ItMakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext.
--> Miss Trunchbull: Imagine a world with no children/ Close your eyes and just dream./ Imagine... come on, try it, the peace and the quiet/ a bubbling stream/ Now imagine a woods with a cottage,/ and inside that cottage we find/ a dwarf called Zeke, a carnival freak/ who can fold paper hats with his mind, and he says/ Don't let them steal your horses, no!/ Don't let them throw them away, no!/ If you find your way through, they'll be waiting for you/ singing... neigh! Neiiigh!
* Also from the musical, before Bruce starts eating the cake:
--> '''Miss Honey:''' Headmistress, he'll be sick!
--> '''Miss Trunchbull:''' He should have thought of that before he made a ''pact'' with ''Satan'' and decided to '''steal my cake'''!
** And then he does a giant burp and notes that it was "the biggest burp [he'd] ever done, the biggest burp [he'd] ever heard [and] the biggest burp [he'd] ever heard ''about''."

--> '''Mrs Wormwood''': ''(goes out with a baby bump)'' "Well, doctor, what's wrong with me?"
--> '''Doctor''': "Mrs Wormwood, do you really have no idea?"
--> '''Mrs Wormwood''': "Gas?"
--> '''Doctor''': "Mrs Wormwood, I want you to think very carefully. What do you think might be the cause of this?" ''(points at Mrs Wormwoods's bump)''
--> '''Mrs Wormwood''': "Am I...am I...look, am I fat?!"
--> '''Doctor''': "You're pregnant!"
--> '''Mrs Wormwood''': "What?"
--> '''Doctor''': "You're going to have a baby."
--> '''Mrs Wormwood''': "But I've got a baby! I don't want another one. Is there anything you can do?"
--> '''Doctor''': "You're nine months pregnant!"
--> '''Mrs Wormwood''': "Antibiotics?"
--> ''[later, after Matilda is born]''
--> '''Doctor''': "Mr Wormwood, are you smoking a cigarette?"
--> '''Mr Wormwood''': "What? Oh, of course. I'm sorry, doctor. What was I thinking? This calls for a proper smoke. ''(throws away cigarette and starts smoking a cigar, holds Matilda)'' Oh, my word, he's an ugly little thing."
--> '''Doctor''': "This is one of the most beautiful children I have ever seen."
--> '''Mr Wormwood''': ''(unwraps the baby's swaddling blanket)'' "Oh, my good Lord, where's his thingie?"
--> '''Doctor''': "His what?"
--> '''Mr Wormwood''': "His thingie. His whatchamacallit. His do-dah. What have you done with his thingie?"
--> '''Doctor''': "This child doesn't have a 'thingie'."
--> '''Mr Wormwood''': "What? A boy with no thingie? Look what you've done, you stupid woman. This boy's got no thingie."
--> '''Doctor''': "Mr Wormwood! This child is a girl."
* During the "Everything I Know, I Learnt from Telly" song, Mr Wormwood says "Who the dickens is Creator/CharlesDickens?"

-->'''Matilda''': "Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. They said their subsequent fall was inevitable."

* At a live cast reunion special, the now-grown child actors [[http://www.buzzfeed.com/leonoraepstein/watch-matilda-cast-members-reenact-scenes-as-grown-ups do reenactment performances of famous scenes from the film]], including the cake-eating and pigtail-toss scenes. It's as hysterical as it sounds. Doubles as heartwarming, when cast members take a look back on what they've accomplished because of the film.

---> '''Harry:''' From now on, this family does exactly what I say [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment WHEN EXACTLY WHEN I SAY IT!]]\\
''[beat]''\\
'''Zinnia''': ''[hands him his hat]'' Here's your hat, Harry.\\
''[Harry snatches his hat and throws it aside]''

** Then there's the fact that the parents are too stupid to put two and two together and deduce that Matilda may have played pranks on them.

*** Mr. Wormwood has just showed his son how to "Super Super-Glue" a bumper to a car....then berates Matilda when she calls him out on his fraud. Rather than considering that "Matilda got back at me by putting glue in my hat", he and his wife come up with weirdness involving head-swelling or hair/hat-fiber-fusion.
* Many of the bits with the [[TheComicallySerious goofy FBI Agents.]]

** When Mr. Wormwood kicks one of them out (Paul Reubens), the agent goes, "Are you interested in time-share"?

** The agents arguing over who gets to use the camcorder during the Garage-snoop. In fact; The dynamic between the agents, period.

** (''jumps off stairs'') "TALLY HO!"

-->'''Trunchbull:''' ''[throws the ribbon to the ground and stomps on it]'' WHO DOES THIS STUPID, DISGUSTING RIBBON BELONG TO?! ''[spits on it]'' I shall personally see to it that the demented, drooling, slime-breathed little Lilliputian who owns this [[ChewingTheScenery DIS-GUS-TING RIBBON,]] '''[[ChewingTheScenery WILL NEVER AGAIN SEE THE LIGHT OF DAY!]]'''

* Matilda's dad is full of hilarious moments, which isn't surprising since it's Danny [=DeVito=] playing him.
* When Matilda first shows Miss Honey her powers, she makes a pitcher of water levitate. Miss Honey, deep in thought, pushes the pitcher back down without even noticing. Matilda then does it again and Miss Honey notices. The look of surprise on her face is adorably funny.
** And then, when the Trunchbull walks in, the pitcher is ''still'' levitating, so Miss Honey grabs the handle and has to pretend she's just casually holding a pitcher of water there.
* Matilda magically makes a glass of water containing a newt tip over onto the Trunchbull, and Trunchbull's desperate attempts to get the creature off of herself are hilarious.
** After everything, Matilda decided to {{lampshade}} said moment to Lavender and Matilda imitating her "dance" when she tried to shake the newt off her chest.
** There's a brief moment when Trunchbull tries to blame Matilda for making it happen (correctly, but no one knows about Matilda's power at this point), and Miss Honey asks how Matilda could possibly have made it happen from across the room. There's a short moment of mental standstill as Trunchbull realizes that there really ''isn't'' any way even she could blame this on Matilda.
* Many, if not all scenes involving [[LargeHam Ms. Trunchbull]] when they aren't nightmarish.
** "WHY ARE ALL THESE WOMEN MARRIED?!"
** "Your mommy... is a TWIT!!"
** "Am I wrong? I'm never wrong. In this classroom, in this school, I am [[SuddenlyShouting GOD!]]"
** "For this newt, you [[PrecisionFStrike PISS-WORM!!]]"
* When Bruce Bogtrotter finishes eating the cake. It's funny because the score in that scene sounds like it belongs in an epic film. It's funny how it takes a scene where a boy is eating cake seriously.
* During the start of the climax, Trunchbull's busy berating the kids and the kids respond to one of her questions:
-->'''Kids:''' Yes, Miss Trunchbull.
-->'''Boy:''' ...sir.
** Hilariously, Ms. Trunchbull pauses for a split second as if pondering what to do with this response, before stiffening up and becoming even ''more'' commanding, as if she took the boy's response as some sort of challenge.
* Even some of the things Mr. Wormwood says and ''how'' he says it...
--> ''[Leaving the hospital with a newborn Matilda]'' "Five thousand dollars?! I'm not paying it! What are they gonna do, repossess the kid?!"
--> ''[Selling a car to Ms. Trunchbull]'' "In a manner of speaking, yes. Uh, welcome to Wormwood Motors. Harry Wormwood, owner, founder, ''whatever!''"
--> ''[Michael chokes on a carrot Matilda just shoved in his mouth with her powers]'' "Chew yer food! You're an animal!"
* When Ms. Honey visits Ms. Trunchbull's office. Trunchbull's antics before she steps in -- target practice on photos of her various students with darts and a javelin -- is [[BlackComedy amusing in a very dark way]]. With her evil chuckling, you just ''know'' she's really enjoying herself.
** And then the ''moment'' Miss Honey leaves, Trunchbull picks up another handful of darts and hurls them at the board, [[ImprobableAimingSkills hitting every single face on the photos in one throw]].
* Mr. Wormwood's subtle reaction to Trunchbull's line about never having been a child. It's like "Uh, Oooookaaayyy...."
* How hammy is the Trunchbull? When she's barking over the PA system, the speaker's mesh actually pulses in and out at though she was yelling just behind it.
* Matilda arguing with her parents about her age.
--> '''Harry:''' Dearest pie, how old is Matilda?
--> '''Zinnia:''' Four.
--> '''Matilda:''' I'm six and a half, Mommy.
--> '''Zinnia:''' Five, then.
* Trunchbull is getting ready to leave her house in her car, but suddenly, a black cat approaches her, meowing for her attention. As it turns out, Trunchbull is a superstitious person and is, therefore, terrified of black cats. The teacher is seen skipping backwards like a scared little girl and tries to scare it off by shaking her key-ring and barking like a dog, only to send it flying by kicking it away when it gets too close for comfort.
* This exchange when Harry catches Matilda reading while he wants the family watching television together.
-->'''Harry:''' What is this trash you're reading?\\
'''Matilda:''' It's not trash, Daddy. It's lovely. It's called ''Literature/MobyDick'' by Herman Melville.\\
'''Harry:''' Moby ''what!?''

[[folder: 1996 Movie]]

[[folder: 2022 Movie]]

[[folder:Meta]]
* At a live cast reunion special, the now-grown child actors [[http://www.buzzfeed.com/leonoraepstein/watch-matilda-cast-members-reenact-scenes-as-grown-ups do reenactment performances of famous scenes from the film]], including the cake-eating and pigtail-toss scenes. It's as hysterical as it sounds. Doubles as heartwarming, when cast members take a look back on what they've accomplished because of the film.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Movie]]

'''Harry:''' My ''hair''...?! ''(goes to the mirror and notices his now-bleached hair)'' '''[[TheScream AAAAAAAARRRRRGH!]]''' ''([[FaceFault falls over sideways in shock]])''

** "Who's in my [[SuddenlyShouting HOUSE]]!?"

** *jumps off stairs* "TALLY HO!!!"

* In the movie Trunchbull's line about playing a game called "who was wearing a pretty red, hair ribbon yesterday, and isn't wearing one today?". The line delivery can crack one up, even though it's probably not meant to be so funny. [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSz19p1Z6i4 here]]

** "Your mommy...is a TWIT!!"

* Even some of the things Mr. Wormwood says and ''how'' he says it....

--> ''[Michael chokes on a carrot Matilda just shoved in there]'' "Chew yer food! You're an animal!"
* When Ms. Honey visits Ms. Trunchbull's office. Trunchbull's antics before she steps in (target practice on kid photos with darts and javelin) is amusing. She's really enjoying herself.

*** Complete with a BombWhistle noise.

*** In a nutshell. The Trunchbull's often hilarious as she is terrifying.

* The entire cast doing a [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L453VY554vg reenactment performance]] the famous chocolate cake scene during a live reunion special. Doubles as heartwarming.

* At a cast reunion, the now-grown child actors [[http://www.buzzfeed.com/leonoraepstein/watch-matilda-cast-members-reenact-scenes-as-grown-ups re-enacted famous scenes from the film]], including the cake-eating and pigtail-toss scenes. It's as hysterical as it sounds.

--->'''Harry:''' What is this trash you're reading?\\

* This exchange when Harry catches Matilda reading when he wants the family together watching television.

'''Harry:''' Moby ''WHAT!?''

---> '''Zinnia:''' I think your head is swollen, Harry.
---> '''Harry:''' The fibers are fused to the head!!
---> '''Zinnia:''' "The fibers are fused"? What's THAT supposed to mean?!

--->'''Zinnia:''' Snickerdoodle, what did you ''do'' to your hair?
--->'''Harry:''' My hair...?! (''goes to the mirror and notices his now-bleached hair'') '''[[TheScream AAAAAAAARRRRRGH!]]''' (''[[FaceFault falls over sideways in shock]]'')