History Funny / CriticalRoleTheBadGuys

* Caleb was heavily wounded by Lorenzo in the fight and Caduceus was out of spell slots. After some delay Jester ''finally'' heals Caleb. The group immediately lampshades it.

''(Group cracks up)''\\

--> '''Liam''': You're probably nailing a two hundred and fifty year old.
--> '''Marisha''': Hot!

'''Campaign 3 (Bell's Hells)''': [[Funny/CriticalRoleShadesOfBlack 1-22]] | [[Funny/CriticalRoleTheSandsAndTheBoughs 23-38]] | [[Funny/CriticalRoleApproachingApogee 39-51]] | [[Funny/CriticalRoleScattered 52-64]] | [[Funny/CriticalRoleElementsOfChaos 65-]]\\

-->'''Matt:''' ''(laughing)'' One of them was enjoying the wind and then darkness forever. The other got a cramp, and then just got bludgeoned from all sides after being jammed in the dirt, and then expired.

[[Funny/CriticalRoleCampaignThree Campaign 3]]: [[Funny/CriticalRoleShadesOfBlack 1-22]] | [[Funny/CriticalRoleTheSandsAndTheBoughs 23-38]] | [[Funny/CriticalRoleApproachingApogee 39-51]] | [[Funny/CriticalRoleScattered 52-64]] | [[Funny/CriticalRoleElementsOfChaos 65-]]\\

[[Funny/CriticalRoleCampaignThree Campaign 3]]\\

** Caduceus's EstablishingCharacterMoment is also hilarious; he looks at the motley crew in front of him (hobo wizard, goblin, Firblog lady, armored dwarf, and Beau) and just sighs, walking back inside the temple while muttering about how he doesn't have enough teacups for everyone.

** While normally Caleb's love for Frumpkin would be a [[CrowningMomentofHeartwarming CMOH]] it edges into abject hilarity on account of the fact that, of course, in addition to kidnapping, enslaving, and torturing his friends Lorenzo did very much ''[[SkewedPriorities also kill Mollymauk]].''

* As the group trek to the Blooming Grove, they try to cautiously creep up on the temple in the middle, but Nott gets snagged on a vine and catches the attention of its inhabitant. Everyone is holding their breath, wondering what fresh hell they just unleashed... and then Matt calls Taliesin to the table, who enters with a shirt that reads "NEW CHARACTER WHO DIS".

* As the group trek to the Blooming Grove, they try to cautiously creep up on the temple in the middle, but Nott gets snagged on a vine and catches the attention of its inhabitant. Everyone is holding their breath, wondering what fresh hell they just unleashed... and then Matt calls Taliesin to the table.

* Taliesin's new character is a Firbolg. Nott, [[RunningGag naturally]], asks if he knows Pumat Sol.
** On top of this, as he enters the room viewers can see that his shirt reads "NEW CHARACTER, WHO DIS?"
* How said character - Caduceus - is introduced; he looks at the motley crew in front of him (hobo wizard, goblin, a Firblog lady, and Beau) and just sighs, commenting on how he doesn't have enough cups for everyone (in regards to tea).
* To test if Caduceus can really heal, Nott shoots Beau with her crossbow. The first is a miss, but the second is a Natural 20. Beau's missile snaring ability still reduces the shot to no damage... until Sam reminds Matt that when he rolls a Nat 20 with this crossbow, it fires another bolt immediately. This one, she doesn't catch.

'''Matt, exasperated:''' Roll... roll for reach around.
* In the middle of the tear jearking and heartwarming scene between Nila and her family, Nott makes an attempt to pick the lock to free her husband... and Sam rolls a natural 1. Resigned Sam decides to do an investigation check on the room so Nott can find some keys to the cage and rolls a natural 1 yet again, much to everyones awe and laughter.

*** While trying to convince Caduceus to drink the whiskey, Nott tries to make it sound appealing by explaining that whiskey is made by putting grains in a barrel and letting them decompose. Talisien then breaks character to ask if Caduceus would know that that's not how whiskey is made, concludes that he obviously wouldn't know that, then has to "finish being angry at Sam" before he can get back into character.

* Nott casts Silent Image to create a duplicate of Beau, leading to jokes of it being a PaletteSwap in the vein of ''VideoGame/StreetFighter''. The insect rolls high enough to see through it despite its low Intelligence, so it obviously wasn't a very good one.

-->'''Nott:''' What happens to Merrows with bad singing voices? They get auto-tuna'd!

* Dark comedy: when the Mighty Nein discuss how to return to Nicodranas (where they are likely wanted people on a pirate ship to boot), Fjord has a hilariously over the top proposal:
-->'''Fjord:''' "Or we go full sails into port, crash into the docks, Caleb sets off a fireball as diversion, we run and hide among the corpses of the innocents that are scattered about."

* In probably one of the biggest instances of Matt being inadvertently trolled by the players, Matt ''finally'' gets to use the semi-homebrewed rules for naval combat he'd been sitting on for weeks, (completed with additional character sheets for everyone detailing their role's special abilities) only for Caduceus to instantly capsize the enemy vessel on some rocks with clever use of Control Water.
* In an anticlimactic way, a large part of Fjord's arc for the first year of the campaign was dedicated to finding out about Vandren and if he was still alive...only for ''Caduceus'' to find out via getting high in the crow's nest and asking the Wildmother about him. Fortunately what ''Caduceus'' finds out raises more questions than it answers, as the Wildmother tells Caduceus Vandren is staying out of sight, and making amends.

* As the search the room at the bottom of the tower they find among other things, a skeleton with it's hips broken. Jester and Beau speculate that he died by sex with something a lot heavier.
-->'''Beau:''' Reverse Cowgirl Death

-->'''Taleisin:''' He was a bad roommate. Don't be a bad roommate.

-->'''Travis:''' That is easily the most ''fucked'' two characters have ever been, to a full reversal. That is the ''deepest'' fuckage we've ever dipped a toe in.

** And finally, there is the unintentional hillarity of Jester committing extreme blasphemy (painting a statue of ''Bahamut'' in ''chromatic'' colors) by ''accident''!

-->'''Twiggy:''' Tentacles. ''*{{beat}}*'' Funny, huh?

* Twiggy in general qualifies, as her character takes the funniest parts of Nott and Jester and rolls them into one energetic gnome of fun.