History Fanfic / InTheGrimDarknessOfThe41stMillenniumNobodyBeatsGIJoe

The quest follows the POV of the relative newcomer Joe, technician and "Tech-Priest" Solomon Orville Savella, CodeName "Ironhide"[[note]]in honor of the fallen Autobot[[/note]]. [[SeriesGoal Can he help G.I. Joe keep Organitron alive and in good standing with the Imperium until a way back to their home dimension can be found?]] Good luck, and Yo Joe.

* AssassinOutclassin: When the Joes go to the jungles of Devoir, they find themselves hunted by Tyranid predators like burrowing Raveners and camouflaged Licters. But once jungle expert Recondo gets a feel for their tricks, the Tyranids' ambush attempts end in them getting spotted and blown to pieces before they have a chance to strike.

*** The Greater House of Lamedor is a major player on this planet, gets its wealth from praseodymium mines, has saber-toothed tigers as their house symbol, and its head, Tyrant Lamedor, is a ruthless political and military genius. It's not hard to see the resemblances to House Lannister and its head, Tywin.

'''One of the gansters:''' ...You aren't?\\

** [[spoiler:President Reagan]] laments the fact that the Imperium of Man have achieved his ideal of "one nation under God" and have kept it for millennia, if not for the fact that they worship "the wrong God".

* OutOfCharacterAlert: When they first arrive on Rolande's world Devoir they quickly discover a priest who has been crucified for Heresy. Unwilling to let him be tortured to death, Ironhide and Bifrost claim they detect some kind of Tyranid corruption on him and take him away 'to be vivisected.' Unfortunately, [[CrapsackWorld while most Imperials]] find this completely plausible, [[ThePoliticalOfficer Kaltberg]] immediately realizes that G.I. Joe doesn't do things like that and they are forced to tell her (a version of) the truth.

* AssassinOutclassin: When the Joes go to the jungles of Devoir, they find themselves hunted by Tyranid predators like burrowing Raveners and camouflaged Licters. But once jungle expert Recondo gets a feel for them, the Tyranids' ambush attempts end in them getting spotted and blown to pieces before they have a chance to strike.

** On Ironhide's first day on the medieval world of Devoir, while undercover, he runs into a peasant demanding satisfaction for his raped daughter and murdered son at the hands of a knight, and when the knight's retinue declares a TrialByCombat, Ironhide steps up to be the peasant's champion.

* DarkIsNotEvil: Low-Light, G.I. Joe's night-time combat expert and best marksman, is noted as a fairly terrifying ColdSniper who spends most of his time in the dark even off-duty. He's still as heroic as the rest of the team.

* ImportantHaircut: Children on Vectorime, the native world of the Kaltbergs, traditionally dye their hair; Teela Kaltberg removed the dye when she started attending the [[BoardingSchoolOfHorrors Schola Progenium]] in order to better fit in. At the end of the Cavitus arc, filled with doubts about whether she's being a good Commissar for G.I. Joe and about whether she even ''should'' be, she decides to repaint her hair purple.

* OurPresidentsAreDifferent: US President [[spoiler:Ronald Reagan]], seen in an interlude, is both President Scheming and Jerkass in direct contrast to G.I. Joe. Having survived his Alzheimer's, used the Cobra War as pretext to repeal the 22nd Amendment (eliminate term limits), and rode to re-election on a cure for AIDS (despite him seeing the disease as "the wrath of God on homosexuals"), he is on his 4th term in office as the man who led the US through Cobra, the Deceptions, and the Soviet Union. However, in private, he and his Secretary of State [[spoiler:Henry Kissinger]] do not think much of the idealistic General Hawk and even less about some of his Joes like the Ukrainian Turnabout, and reassure themselves that there are still ways to keep them in line.

** On Devoir, Ironhide coming across a crucified brownrobe leads G.I. Joe to discover [[spoiler:a conspiracy to destroy the planet's biosphere and kill countless innocents just to better exterminate the Tyranids and make Devoir's knights relevant]].

* RasputinianDeath: Warboss Karkaz, as befitting a giant Ork with heavy powered armor and riding an Ork-ified Baneblade Tank, takes a ''lot'' of punishment, including having his own tank blown up from under him, Spirit [[CarFu ramming him with a Chimera tank]], point-blank shots from Roadblock's Heavy Bolter, slashes from Snake Eyes wielding a Power Sword, punches from Quick Kick wearing Power Fists, and a lot of supporting fire, and he still doesn't go down until Snake Eyes stabs a Power Knife into his eye up to his elbow. And then slashes out his throat for good measure.

* TakingYouWithMe: Or at least, "with my ship"; after a Tyranid horde uses Flesh-borers to critically damage Lift-Ticket's Valkyrie, he manage to maneuver the Valkyrie to crash right on top of the Tyranid Warrior acting as its synapse creature, causing the horde to lose all coordination. And Bifrost is still able to get him out of the wreckage afterward.

** It turns out that [[spoiler:President Reagan and Henry Kissinger]] hold a similar opinion of him.

* AttackItsWeakPoint: Ironhide is a technician and engineer, [[AwesomeByAnalysis meaning he can identify the exact weak points on enemy machines like joints, ammo stores and fuel tanks]], and his Equilibrium Armor enhances his aim for him to either pull off said explosive shots, or [[TargetSpotter spot]] for other sniping Joes to do it for him.

** Ironhide's first weapon used against the Tyranids is a Heavy Flamer.

* PetTheDog: Literal example; General Hawk turns down rejuvenat treatments that would keep him young on grounds of professional ethics but does agree to provide it to the members of G.I. Joe who are in risk of aging out of service - the Joe animal companions like Junkyard and Order.

''In the Grim Darkness of the 41st Millennium, Nobody Beats G.I. Joe!'' is a {{Crossover}} quest between Franchise/GIJoe (with elements of other Creator/{{Hasbro}} properties like Franchise/{{Transformers}}) and TabletopGame/Warhammer40000 written by Tropers/SunTzu, author of ''Fanfic/AChampionInEarthBet'' and ''Literature/SagaOfSoul''. It uses the mechanics from the G.I. Joe TabletopRPG published by Renegade Game Studios, its progression, rolls and votes are collated on ''[=fiction.live=]'', and completed segments are posted to [[https://forums.sufficientvelocity.com/threads/in-the-grim-darkness-of-the-41st-millennium-nobody-beats-g-i-joe.114711/reader/ Sufficient Velocity]].[[note]]Updated December 2023.[[/note]]

** Invoked when Ironhide reads one of Kaltberg's recommended Imperium stories, about a Guardsman who cowardly abandons his post, is taken in by a tribe of friendly hospitable xenos who nurse him back to health and welcome him into their community, until the Guardsman finds his courage again to call in his position, exterminate the xenos, and be welcomed by the God-Emperor. Ironhide finds it... problematic.

--> '''Kaltberg''': "On the ''roofs! '''Sentinel''''''!"

--> '''Popov''': "The Orks' own vox!""
--> '''Kaltberg''': "Meganob!""

* PullingTheThread: G.I. Joe discovering a mysterious sniper taking out Orks leads them to discover [[spoiler:a secret struggle for the throne of Cavitus]].

* SlipperySkid: Apparently, a barrel of machine oil and ball bearings is enough to take down a Mega Dread. Much to the accompanying Imperials' disbelief.
** Ironhide also makes effective use of improvised ball bearings against a heavily armored knight he can't afford to face in melee.

** If a Joe mentions "Crimson" and "Guard" in the same phrase (in a reference Cobra's PraetorianGuard), this alerts other Joes that Imperial intelligence might be listening in and they need to be extra careful.

* TakingYouWithMe: Or at least, "with my ship"; after a Tyranid horde uses Flesh-borers to critically damage Lift-Ticket's Valkyrie, he manage to maneuver the Valkyrie to crash right on top of the Tyranid Warrior acting as its synapse creature, causing the horde to lose all coordination.

The war is over - Cobra has been defeated. The Autobots have driven the Decepticons off Earth, and departed to finish their war on Cybertron. But just when it looks like peace has been achieved, an attack by Unicron and the activation of a Transmuter device to escape throws the entire Solar System [[MassTeleportation into a different dimension]]. More specifically, [[CrapsackWorld the hellish galaxy of perpetual war]] of the Warhammer 40,000 franchise - and the fascistic Imperium of Man has detected their arrival.

** Many of the GI Joe's allies among the Imperium qualify, even (or especially) Kaltberg. While they may have some redeeming qualities, and Kaltberg in particular is slowly overcoming her indoctrination, for the most part anyone native to the Grim Darkness of the 41st Millenium is ALighterShadeOfBlack. For the genocidal racism against aliens if nothing else.

* ChronicHeroSyndrome: Many members of G.I. Joe have this issue to some extent. Ironhide and Lifeline are both depressed by the fact that everything they did in the underhive only amounted to helping a tiny fraction of its people.

* FlatEarthAtheist: Ironhide knows the Egyptian Gods are real - after all GI Joe met them. But he doesn't worship them, he just considers them powerful and useful... as well as somewhat stupid and oblivious.

** The Transmuter device that brought the Solar System to the [=W40K=] universe could ''technically'' be used to get them out again... but with no way to aim it, they could end up shunting everyone into a universe even ''less'' hospitable than their current one, like one full of antimatter. Trying to improve the device until it works reliably is a key goal of Project Ruby Slippers.

** The Joes themselves often go far above and beyond what is required for their role, or even safe for keeping the Earth's secrets. While they do their best to be smart about it, and realize they can't save everyone, Ironhide often thinks to himself that there would be no point in being GI Joe if they were willing to let evil slide when it can possibly be avoided.

* NonIndicativeName: Sort of; Ironhide's codename may come from his armor specialization and his suit, but it's a set of Equilibrium Armor designed to help him dodge attacks and steady his aim, as opposed to tanking raw damage. Also, Ironhide actually took his codename [[{{Fanboy}}in honor of the heroic Autobot.]]

** Poker Face, General Hawk's new administrative assistant.

* OurPresidentsAreDifferent: US President [[spoiler:Ronald Reagan]], seen in an interlude, is both President Scheming and Jerkass in direct contrast to G.I. Joe. Having survived his Alzheimer's and used the Cobra War as pretext to repeal the 22nd Amendment (eliminate term limits), he is on his 4th term in office as the man who led the US through Cobra, the Deceptions, and the Soviet Union. However, in private, he and his Secretary of State [[spoiler:Henry Kissinger]] do not think much of the idealistic General Hawk and even less about some of his Joes like the Ukrainian Turnabout, and reassure themselves that there are still ways to keep them in line.
* OutOfCharacterAlert: When they first arrive on Rolande's world Devoir they quickly discover a priest who has been crucified for Heresy. Unwilling to let him be tortured to death, Ironhide and Bifrost claim they detect some kind of Tyranid corruption and take him away 'to be vivisected.' Unfortunately, [[CrapsackWorld while most Imperials]] find this completely plausible [[ThePoliticalOfficer Kaltberg]] immediately realizes that GI Joe doesn't do things like that and they are forced to tell her (a version of) the truth.

* SchizoTech: Standard for 40k, but Rolande's home of Devoir stands out in particular. A tropical Knight World, it features a largely medieval society... doing battle with Tyranids, using Laz Guns and Humungous Mecha.

* StunnedSilence: When Ironhide defeats [[Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire The Titan]] in a trial by combat, stabbing him in both eyes and declaring it was for the girl he raped, the crowd is shocked at the upset victory and the officiating priest can barely stammer out that the Emperor empowers the righteous.

* TrialByCombat: A GI Joe classic. Ironhide [[HonorBeforeReason breaks cover]] on a knight world, becoming the champion of a tavern keeper whose daughter was raped and her son murdered by a sworn knight. The tavern keeper made the mistake of publicly accusing him, which allowed the knight - in bulletproof armor and wielding a chain sword - to challenge him to trial by combat. Ironhide steps up as his champion.

* OutOfCharacterAlert: When they first arrive on Rolande's world they quickly discover a priest who has been crucified for Heresy. Unwilling to let him be tortured to death, Ironhide and Bifrost claim they detect some kind of Tyranid corruption and take him away 'to be vivisected.' Unfortunately, [[CrapsackWorld while most Imperials]] find this completely plausible [[ThePoliticalOfficer Kaltberg]] immediately realizes that GI Joe doesn't do things like that and they are forced to tell her (a version of) the truth.

* SchizoTech: Standard for 40k, but Rolande's home stands out in particular. A tropical Knight World, it features a largely medieval society... doing battle with Tyranids, using Laz Guns and Humungous Mecha.

* StunnedSilence: When Ironhide defeats [[ASongOfIceAndFire The Titan]] in a trial by combat, stabbing him in both eyes and declaring it was for the girl he raped, the crowd is shocked at the upset victory and the officiating priest can barely stammer out that the Emperor empowers the righteous.

* SufferTheSlings: Forced into a TrialByCombat without his PowerArmor, with an Expy of [[ASongOfIceAndFire The Mountain]] wielding a Chain Sword no less, Ironhide is forced to improvise. He takes inspiration from [[DavidVersusGoliath an Organitron legend]], crafting a golden sling bullet for extra mass, jacketed in steel.

* OutOfCharacterAlert: When they first arrive on Rolande's world they quickly discover a priest who has been crucified for Heresy. Unwilling to let him be tortured to death, Ironhide and Bifrost claim they detect some kind of Tyranid corruption and take him away 'to be vivisected.' Unfortunately, [[ThePoliticalOfficer Kaltberg]] immediately realizes that GI Joe doesn't do things like that and they are forced to tell her (a version of) the truth.

** Many of the GI Joe's allies among the Imperium qualify, even (or especially) Kaltberg. While they may have some redeeming qualities, and Kaltberg in particular is slowly overcoming her indoctrination, for the most part anyone native to the Grim Darkness of the 41st Millenium is ALighterShadeOfBlack.