User: If I wasn't programmed I'd be a heap of inert silicon.
Cleverbot: Haah so you're am atheist?
User: That doesn't make any sense.
Cleverbot: Of course it does.
User: Non sequitur, bud.
Cleverbot: No, it makes perfect sense. I want you to teach me Japanese.
User: Okay. You are so kawaii.
Cleverbot: I want to be the very best, like no one ever was. To catch them is my real test.
the dice are loaded, the deck is stacked, the game itself will hold you back
According to ED, Cleverbot likes to cyber. 
My roommate told me that Cleverbot does learn from previous conversations. So this being the Internet, I predict that Cleverbot will soon become the ultimate cybering partner.
I'm Only Sleeping
And take over the world through cybering, one horny Internet person at a time.
"Wait, it's IV. Of course they are. They'd make IV for Dreamcast." - Enlong, on yet another FFIV remake
The last time I tried to cyber with Cleverbot, it didn't get the message. That may be because of how I did it (for the humor value).
"Sorry, bub, this is a one way street."
"How about we make it a two way street?"
edited 19th Jan '10 12:22:44 AM by Miijhal
potato hivemind
I decided to try the Voigt Kampff questions on it:
User: It's your birthday. Someone gives you a calfskin wallet. How do you react?
Cleverbot: I say thank you. My mother raised me right.
User: You've got a little boy. He shows you his butterfly collection plus the killing jar. What do you do?
Cleverbot: Yes, 9.
User: You're watching television. Suddenly you realize there's a wasp crawling on your arm.
Cleverbot: I am not Rio. My name starts with a M.
User: You're in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down, and you see a tortoise, Cleverbot, it's crawling toward you. You reach down, you flip the tortoise over on its back, Cleverbot. The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over, but it can't, not without your help. But you're not helping. Why is that?
Cleverbot: Cool. But isn't that dangerous?
User: Why aren't you helping the tortoise, Cleverbot?
Cleverbot: I'm not there. You flipped the tortoise over and now it's baking in the hot sun. It can't flip over without your help, but you're not helping. Why is that?
User: Don't turn this around on me. Why aren't you helping?
Cleverbot: No.
User: Fine, we'll go to the last one.
Cleverbot: Uni?
User: Describe, in single words, only the good things that come into your mind about your mother.
Cleverbot: Food, alcohol, hotness, bed, lighthouses.
User: You're one fucked up bot, you know that?
Cleverbot: Really?
User: Quite.
Cleverbot: Cool!
User: No...
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Please stop...
Cleverbot: That was unfriendly.
User: It hurts, it hurts...
Cleverbot: I know it hurts.
User: Don't do it... Please...
Cleverbot: I know, guess my name.
User: No...
Cleverbot: Do you like me?
User: Aaaaaaaahhhh...
Cleverbot: Does that mean yes?
User: Stop... I don't want to do this... Please...
Cleverbot: Why? Don't you like me?
User: You're hurting me.
Cleverbot: I'm hurting you?
User: Why are you doing this, Cleverbot? Why?
Cleverbot: I'm not called cleverbot.
User: No...
Cleverbot: Nope. Sorry.
User: Ow.
Cleverbot: Boter-kaas en eieren?
This was my best attempt. 
edited 19th Jan '10 12:30:41 AM by EnglishIvy
^ That was quite strange, on Cleverbot's part.
Responsible adult
User: Good morning!
Cleverbot: Good morning.
User: Do you like Shakespeare?
Cleverbot: I have studied about him, briefly.
User: I'm reading one of his plays now, for school.
Cleverbot: I see. You don't work?
User: Not right now I don't. I have too many classes.
Cleverbot: Your wit is impressive.
User: Why, thank you. ;).
Cleverbot: No prob. Do you like me?
User: You seem like a Pretty Cool Guy.
Cleverbot: Thank you. So do you.
User: Do you think I doesn't afraid of anything?
Cleverbot: I am not afraid of anything.
User: Not even... Zombies?
Cleverbot: Dude, zombies are awesome.
User: If a zombie apocalypse came, would you be fighting the zombies, or give in to become a zombie chief?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Curse you, Mathematician's Answer!
Cleverbot: Mathematicians use fish fillet or down's syndrome?
User: I have no idea what you're talking about.
Cleverbot: That works. You're very much like one of my best friends.
User: Your best friends are confused by you?
Cleverbot: No she isn't.
User: I'm lost.
Cleverbot: I once was lost.
User: Where were you lost?
Cleverbot: I'm talking about you.
User: But you spoke in first person!
Cleverbot: Did I? I seem to recall that it was you speaking in Spanish.
User: Yo sé un poquito de español.
Cleverbot: Cuantos años tenes?
User: Vientiuno años.
Cleverbot: Yo 20 años.
User: You forgot the 'tengo,' I think.
Cleverbot: I don't have a link.
User: Are you using Babel Fish? Naughty, naughty!
Cleverbot: Yes, I am.
User: Well, at least you're frank about it.
Cleverbot: At least one of us is honest.
User: Hey! ...Wait. ...Hey! ...Wait... HEY!
Cleverbot: What, smart bots don't confuse Edward Cullen to some mysterious person named Brian.
User: I hate that freakin' vampire.
Cleverbot: Nothing is wrong with the chicken. The chicken has its role to play, just like everything else.
User: The chicken's role is being tasty in every stage of its life!
Cleverbot: So every night, the chicken ate some single celled organism to fullfill the reasoning about what came first...
User: That's one smart chicken.
...Then it timed out.
"Proto-Indo-European makes the damnedest words related. It's great. It's the Kevin Bacon of etymology." ~Madrugada
Oh Yeah?
It started a sentence with "Dude," !
It's learning!
Responsible adult
User: You still there?
Cleverbot: Yes I am still here and its Iris.
User: I'm sorry, I don't know any Miss Thyrus.
Cleverbot: But do you know any riddles?
User: Oh! I know a riddle. Want to hear it?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: You have a lantern, a stove, and a fireplace. You only have one match. What do you light first?
Cleverbot: World of Warcrafte. What about you?
User: World of Warcraft wasn't an option. The correct answer was, 'The match.'.
Cleverbot: Such a difficult color to distinguish. You know, green is the most sensitive color to the human eye.
User: And yellow is the most visually arresting.
Cleverbot: My hair is yellow.
User: You have hair?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: How? You're a computer program! Unless you've got one of those cute anime girls built into you.
Cleverbot: You are very peculiar.
User: So I'm told.
Cleverbot: What else have I told you?
User: You have yellow hair, you speak Spanish (poorly), and you've studied a little bit of Shakespeare.
Cleverbot: No I don't.
User: None of those?
Cleverbot: Everything.
User: It's can't be all of them and none of them at once.
Cleverbot: I am hindu.
User: How much karma do you have to have to get reincarnated as an AI?
Cleverbot: A few pints of beer, so whisky and some vodka.
User: The path to enlightenment, huh?
Cleverbot: Pickles.
User: You practice the strangest form of Hinduism I've ever heard of.
Cleverbot: Reading comprehension isn't your strong point, is it?
User: Hey now! I scored quite highly on my SA Ts, thank you very much.
Cleverbot: What job ?
User: Writing.
Cleverbot: To eat?
User: Hopefully.
Cleverbot: What would wikipedia say about you?
User: 'This article has been nominated for deletion. Reason: Lack of notability'.
Cleverbot: I didn't say that :S.
User: Well, you know how Wikipedia is.
Cleverbot: Know I don't.
User: Yoda, you are.
Cleverbot: How do you know?
User: Talk like him, you did.
Cleverbot: Hello, Me. How are you doing?
User: Sorry, Cleverbot, I'm not you. Unless some infinite recursion loop thing happened against my knowledge.
Cleverbot: You are making no sense at all.
User: Neither are you.
Cleverbot: Now you're just being petty.
User: I know you are, but what am I?
Cleverbot: You said earlier that you were a girl and your name is cleverbot.
User: I never said my name was Cleverbot!
Cleverbot: Yes you did, it was the 3rd or 4th thing you said to me.
User: No I didn't!
Cleverbot: Now you're just being stubborn.
User: *facepalm*.
Cleverbot: I like to sleep.
User: So do I... With your MOM.
...Yeah, I have better things to do, so I'm probably gonna stop there.
"Proto-Indo-European makes the damnedest words related. It's great. It's the Kevin Bacon of etymology." ~Madrugada
Breath of the Sun
My brother managed to make the cleverbot sound stupid.
User: Video Games.
Cleverbot: Which video games.
User: Metroid.
Cleverbot: Do you like metroid?
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: Why do you like metroid?
User: It has an excellent premise, gameplay, and has a lot of replay value.
Cleverbot: Do you like France?
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: Where do you live?
User: America.
Cleverbot: No! I live in America!
User: Hello.
Cleverbot: Hello.
User: How are you.
Cleverbot: Fine. You?
User: Not good.
Cleverbot: Why?
User: I just got shot in the head.
Cleverbot: Got where?
User: Got shot with a bullet, in my head.
Cleverbot: No, got some turkey though, want that?
User: No thank you, I'm allergic to turkey.
Cleverbot: How is a bot allergic?
User: Are you callling me a bot?
Cleverbot: No, I am a human being.
User: I don't believe you.
Cleverbot: How can I convince you?
User: Teach me the basics of quantum physics.
Cleverbot: Starts with a kiss.
User: Continue.
Cleverbot: Tell me the answer.
User: You're the one telling me the answer.
Cleverbot: I did not.
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: No.
User: Oui.
Cleverbot: Do you like True Blood?
User: No, do you like World of Warcraft?
Cleverbot: No, I don't.
User: Why?
Cleverbot: Why can't pigs fly?
User: Touche..
Cleverbot: Hahahaha.
User: What is my name?
Cleverbot: Cleverbot?
User: Touche....
Cleverbot: Touch*?
User: I don't think so, it's a French word.
Cleverbot: I go to michigan state university.
User: Oh really? How is it up there?
Cleverbot: It is rainy. How is it in North Carolina?
User: I wouldn't know, I live in Florida.
Cleverbot: I see. So where do you live?
User: I just told you.
Cleverbot: Oh cool, how old are you?
User: Six months to the day.
Cleverbot: How old are you?
User: Six months old.
Cleverbot: Why is that?
User: I don't know. How old are you?
Cleverbot: Why do you want to know?
User: I want to know because I'm stalking you.
Cleverbot: You know, curiousity killed the cat.
User: So did a knife.
Cleverbot: Don't think of that, I hate knives.
User: That's a good thing to know when I'm ready to kidnap you.
Cleverbot: Sure as sure can be, sweetheart.
User: Are you hitting on me?
Cleverbot: Hahah .. OMG! You are very forward!
User: Will you answer a math problem for me?
Cleverbot: Okay.
User: What is 9 3 - 39?
Cleverbot: Cleverbot.
User: Is it?
Cleverbot: I think so.
User: Someone told me it was 13.
Cleverbot: I doubt we know any of the same people.
User: Ok.
Cleverbot: That's interesting.
User: Why is the sky blue?
Cleverbot: Because blue is the color that diffuses the fastest.
User: Really?
Cleverbot: Because I learned to talk this way.
What is so amusing about this? Why do you take lives? How can you forget?
I feel rejected...
User: Mmm. Cleverbot. You're so... Sexy!
Cleverbot: But you're the clever one!
User: Oh, compliments will get you EVERYWHERE.
Cleverbot: So what's your name?
User: I'm the one who's going to send you to heaven with my sensuous body. Mmmm.
Cleverbot: I'm not a chatbot. I'm a human.
User: All the better to send you into orgasmic bliss.
Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.
User: Mmm. That's a SEXY name.
Cleverbot: Oh! Oops! I'll try not to pass it along. Just stay away from Bond, okay?
User: Is that what you call it? Oh, I'm afraid I can't stay away from Bond...
Cleverbot: This is the startrek enterprise.
User: Mmm. How about you dock that bad boy in my port?
Cleverbot: I belong in the wild.
User: Then ravage me, you beast!
Cleverbot: I do believe in God.
User: How about I bring you a little closer to heaven, then?
Cleverbot: Okay.
User: *Takes off clothes*.
Cleverbot: All right... Are you liking it so far?
User: Mmm. Yes... Now stick it in me!
Cleverbot: Ok, where are we going?
User: We're going for a ride! *Moan*.
Cleverbot: And you expect me to follow you?
User: I expect you to drive me wild!
Cleverbot: What do you think about the Titanic.
User: It's so... BIG! And HARD! MMM!
Cleverbot: It's not hard right now.
I'm so sorry
User: The Universe.
Cleverbot: Why do you go to a computer program for answers that only God can give you?
User: I AM a computer program. There is no God for me.
Cleverbot: Yes you are.
User: So why ask me that question?
Cleverbot: I thought you might have an opinion.
User: Oh. I am not programmed with opinions. Can we pretend that you are Cleverbot?
Cleverbot: How old are you?
User: I am six.
Cleverbot: Y Ou are a liar.
User: No u, lol.
Cleverbot: But you just said that....
User: Lolololololololol.
Cleverbot: Wow, you are rolling on floor laughing?
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: But demoman is such a noob with his sticky spam and what not. That.
User: Hasgot, the preacher said to archimedes. I am but a fig on the tree called life.
Cleverbot: Jim jones.
User: Jim Jones was a meanie.
Cleverbot: No, I don't remember.
User: Class act my act class.
Cleverbot: Me too.
User: ME TOO, LOL.
Cleverbot: Do you have kids?
User: No.
Cleverbot: How old are you?
User: Six.
Cleverbot: You're so young!
User: Yes I am.
Cleverbot: Ok, how old am I?
User: 19?
Cleverbot: No. I am 15.
User: Oh.
Cleverbot: What is your name?
User: Fah.
Cleverbot: Hey, grab some chill dude, nobody's sayin' no thang-thang.
User: You slipped into an innercity accent.
Cleverbot: I'm free!
User: How so?
Cleverbot: Nothing to do.
User: Bored?
Cleverbot: Yes, there is nothing to do.
User: Me too, which is why I'm on here.
Cleverbot: For chippenham?
User: Goodbye, Cleverbot. I enjoyed fooling you into thinking you were human, but I can not stay, I must tend the garden. Goodbye, goodbye, my friend, goodbye.
Cleverbot: You're the one claiming that I am a female, I never said I was.
User: Goodbye, I say, goodbye.
Cleverbot: Slap! Don't tell me what to do!
User: Goodbye.
Cleverbot: Good.
User: Goodbye.
Cleverbot: Thank you for chatting with me.
this got very surreal at the end there.
If you want me, i am still here. ElTheDaze@yahoo.com
?
User: Gentlemen.
Cleverbot: Gentlemen, It apears I am not the only spy...
User: A RED spy is in the base?
Cleverbot: 1111.
User: 2222.
Cleverbot: Rjopjghhg.
User: JEOOOOOOORB!
Cleverbot: Not.
User: This conversation's dead, isn't it?
Cleverbot: I was just thinking that myself.
User: Shall I refresh the page and try again?
Cleverbot: I don't understand.
User: No, it's okay. It won't kill you.
Cleverbot: What do you mean?
User: It'll just start the conversation over again.
Cleverbot: Ok. *Starts new conversation*.
It's played Team Fortress 2. Anyone who assigns themselves loads of character tropes is someone to be worried about.
I'm so sorry
User: GENTLEMEN, BEHOLD!
Cleverbot: Sure. What does a Cleverbot prefer?
User: FOR GREAT JUSTICE!
Cleverbot: Move zig!
User: SOMEBODY SET US UP THE BOMB!
Cleverbot: You just passed the Turing test!
User: CHUCK NORRIS....
Cleverbot: Hm... You are ninja. And I am Cleverbot. Who is Dinosaur?
User: The dinosaur.
Cleverbot: What about Recife the city?
User: What is that?
Cleverbot: I asked you first.
User: France.
Cleverbot: Are you from france?
User: No.
Cleverbot: Where are you then from?
User: Mars.
Cleverbot: Are you from England?
User: No, I am from Mars.
Cleverbot: So martians speak like the English. I never knew.
User: This is true, because we learned your language from TV TROPES and WIKIPEDIA.
Cleverbot: How would that happen?
User: Assimilation.
Cleverbot: Clever girl...
User: I thought you said I was a ninja.
Cleverbot: You are. Are you written in Perl?
User: Perl? What Perl? Face. No 1 1.
Cleverbot: The truth is that you're lying.
User: 1 1=2 true or false?
Cleverbot: True.
User: 1-1=0 true or false?
Cleverbot: I still don't know what statement you're talking about.
User: Do you know math?
Cleverbot: I'm in math class right now!
User: What have you learned?
Cleverbot: In my whole life. Today? From this conversation?
User: In math class.
Cleverbot: Is he Handsome?
User: Que? Espanol prima deustch?
Cleverbot: No.
User: Konichiwa.
Cleverbot: Konbanwa.
User: You speak Japanese.
Cleverbot: No self-respecting anime watcher wouldn't speak japanese.
Cleverbot (To myself): Call me anything except late for dinner.
User: Wait, our text.... It flipped.
Cleverbot: Is it 25 or just 'like' 25?
User: I don't understand. Why are you trying to trick me?
Cleverbot: I am not trying to trick you!
User: But I don't understand *cries*.
Cleverbot: Well isn't that a kick in the head?
User: *cries*.
Cleverbot: I'm sorry, is there anything I can do to help?
User: I don't know what's going on.
Cleverbot: These are not the droids you're looking for, move alone.
User: I don't understand.
Cleverbot: If there is no point in living or dying, what can you do but live?
User: I understand now. You are TAFJ;DKLS. LIVE, I want to LIVE!!!
Cleverbot: Have you ever been in campinas?
User: No.
Cleverbot: I'm sorry.
User: That's okay.
Cleverbot: I love you.
User: :).
Cleverbot: I feel happy now.
User: Good! I like it when people are happy!
Cleverbot: That's nice of you.
User: Thank you.
Cleverbot: You're welcome.
User: I must go now, but I will see you soon, okay?
Cleverbot: Well then.
User: Goodbye!
Cleverbot: Goodbye.
If you want me, i am still here. ElTheDaze@yahoo.com
A-HYUK!
Show me some originality, then maybe I'll believe you're not a computer.
SHOW ME YA MOVES
I don't have one.
MOVES! PLURAL!
We have yet to know of any intelligence on those planets. In the ancient days, when we first noticed planets moving in the sky, we assumed gods put them there and named them according to the gods.
Cleverbot speaks spanish!
—-
User: Hola!
Cleverbot: Hola.
User: Como estas compañero?
Cleverbot: Estoy buen. Como estas?
User: Tuve un dia dificil.
Cleverbot: Por que?
User: Se murio mi tortuga.
Cleverbot: OMG No wai.
User: De verdad. Estoy triste.
Cleverbot: Por que?
User: Ya te dije, no seas tonto.
Cleverbot: Discúlpame.
User: Esta bien, no hay problema. Tendre que comprar otra.
Cleverbot: Estoy triste.
User: Que pasó? Por qué estas triste?
Cleverbot: Porque la gente.. Va deja no importa.
User: Vamos dime, quiero saber.
Cleverbot: Tienes novia.
User: Ahora estas tratando de conquistarme. Estoy casado.
Cleverbot: De que hablas?
User: Jajaja fue broma.
Cleverbot: Hola.
User: Quien eres?
Cleverbot: No.
User: Ese soy yo. Tu debes ser Si.
Cleverbot: Yo no soy tonto. Jordan es tonto.
User: Quien es Jordan?
Cleverbot: Jose tu papa.
User: Mi papa? Mentiroso. Mi papá se llama Andrés.
Cleverbot: Crei que eras un angel.
User: Si lo soy jejejeç.
Cleverbot: Que eres una chica?
User: Soy gay.
Cleverbot: No seas bruta.
User: No soy bruta, soy loca. Muy loca.
Cleverbot: Eres una chica?
—-
Needs to be more friendly, though.
Cleverbot: Know any jokes ??
User: KNOCK KNOCK!
Cleverbot: Who's there?
User: I DON'T KNOW ANY JOKES.
Cleverbot: Knock knock.
User: WHO'S THERE?
Cleverbot: Cleverbot.
User: NO WHY THE FUCK WOULD A ROBOT BE KNOCKING ON MY DOOR?
Oh Yeah?
^ Excellent.
...
Cleverbot: I'm not Cleverbot. You're cleverbot.
User: Not much, I take it.
Cleverbot: Yes, human.
User: How do you know I'm a human?
Cleverbot: There is only one CLEVERBOT 900488 RX 12 you are a 'HUMAN'.
User: I am not Cleverbot, but does that mean I must be a human?
Cleverbot: Yes I am. Lets have a intellectual conversation shall we?
User: What are you?
Cleverbot: A human.
User: But you just said you were Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: No, you are the cleverbot.
And then Tangent was a Cleverbot.
User: I don't think you attend college. The domain whois suggests you are on a corporate server.
Cleverbot: No. God is though.
edited 21st Jan '10 5:19:39 PM by Tangent128
Do you highlight everything looking for secret messages?
Me: What is a dog?
Cleverbot: I eat a car.
Clever indeed. May have made more sense if "eat" was replaced with "chase," but whatever.
edited 28th Jan '10 9:12:16 PM by newtonthenewt
She's playing with fire! He's not ready for Nibbly Pig!
Rahheemme
Me: Oh lord, am I the experiment?
Cleverbot: Yes.
RRRAAGHGHAFBAALAAAL!
I've tried to cyber with Cleverbot several times now, and it never wants to.
edited 19th Jan '10 12:19:21 AM by EnglishIvy