ITT: The British Are Coming!

What do I do? What do I do? What do I do!? They've burned down Washington who should I turn to now?

Yes, I'm pretending that America had the internet back then.

FIRST POST!

edited 31st Oct '10 9:41:55 AM by Noaqiyeum

Too late, chaps. We're already here.

Indeed we are. So now what? Shall we have some tea?

What ho, tea and taxes for all.

SAND PAUL REVIERISEPH! We told you to deliver that message during the Revolution, you're over two decades late! Washington wasn't even planned when you left! Where have you been?

We are the Dutch. Give us back New Amsterdam and surrender your ships. We will add your colonies to our own. Your culture will adapt to service us. Resistance is futile.

WHAT YEAR IS THIS? I thought it was 12 past the last, but all these Europeans seem to think it's either '75 or about a century before that.

-Aiming revolver with telescope held on top using string from nearby country that does not exist yet-

Where's those frenchmen?

This is 1812. We want our colonies back, do you hear me? However, we were not informed that the colonies had broken away. Surrender, America, or suffer our not-exactly-Scandinavian wrath!

None of you should be in America! It belongs to Spain and Portugal!

Wha- WHEN DID YOU GET HERE!? AFTER MY FUTURE SUPPORTER'S TIME TRAVEL SHENANIGANS, YOU SHOULD HAVE LOST TO THE MOORS!

NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is suprise...surprise and fear...fear and surprise.... Our two weapons are fear and surprise...and ruthless efficiency.... Our *three* weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency...and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope.... Our *four*...no... *Amongst* our weapons.... Amongst our weaponry...are such elements as fear, surprise.... I'll come in again

NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Amongst our weaponry are such diverse elements as: fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency, an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope, and nice red uniforms - Oh damn!

Enough! The time traveller assured me that Rodrigo Diez de Vivar was killed during his childhood and never became El Cid Campeador! What in the world happened here!?

Revolvers don't exist yet either.

Revolvers? We don't need those! Our time-travelling allies have supplied us with ASSAULT RIFLES!!!

BETTER! NUKES!

Remember: friends don't let friends time travel drunk.

The British Are Coming!

Hey, what the—ew, ew, ew, EW! Dammit, Bobby G, this is a public space! You NASTY!

edited 31st Oct '10 7:58:55 PM by Charlatan

-Attempts to shoot telescope-revolver at nuke from Australia-

YOU! Give me those nukes!

You're all insane!

Forget this, I'm going to invade Canada.

Mind if I join you? The Untied Dutch-Mongol Empire needs more territory.

Invade Canada? We haven't even properly accommodated our new Dutch Overlords yet and you're off rushing to conquer them new territ'ry!