Push the button?

I will give it a try, I accept the deal.

You gain the ability to tear any secret from another person at will.
However;
Each time you use this ability you will also learn another secret which will cause you to feel great fear or sorrow.

edited 20th Jun '15 5:24:48 AM by Laithelryn

Pass, I'm not interested in secrets.

Tetris is now a two-player, live-action game!

BUT

While one player controls the blocks as normal, the other is in the playing field trying to survive the Video Game Cruelty Potential. You'll also be the first player who goes inside the field.

edited 20th Jun '15 7:36:18 AM by aNinjaWithAIDS

So, technically a game show where Anyone Can Die? No thanks.

Dragons are real

But

They are not all civil yet, and 65% of them are known to "hump" humans and impregnate them.

Ew...that would just be a huge mess. (Pass)

You will become a Pokemon.

But

You can only become Latios or Latias, and you have to be the one that's the opposite gender of you.

Hey, at least i'm a Pokemon.

You can eat anything and lose weight

BUT

Everytime you eat, you get thinner.

That'll eventually be bad, so no.

You can jump into any Painting, Computer Screen, Book or Television Screen.

BUT

You won't be able to interact with anything. Everything will ignore your existence.

So it will be like I'm actually there in the audience. I'm in.

There are Zombies everywhere.

BUT

They are here to kill the Werewolves.

Hm... no, because zombie werewolves would screw everything over.

You have the power to fly

BUT

You have to eat snails as fuel.

Escargo?! FUCK YEA!

You can become an animal for one hour at a time or less.

BUT

It's limited to Rat, pony, and frog

It doesn't say I can't be a fictional rat, pony, or frog.

You'll receive infinite wishes

BUT

All of them will be interpreted literally.

I accept the deal! It could be very useful as long as I am careful.

You gain the ability to conjure whatever food or drink you desire at will. It is always delicious.
Hower;
You become very ill upon eating any food you did not conjure.

So? Free always-delicious food all the way.

You can go into any form of media.

BUT

You can be killed by anything in the setting.

Sure. That's why you don't wander off!

You get diplomatic immunity,

BUT

Nobody wants to talk to you for their diplomatic needs.

Fuck them. <PRESS>

You become a ninja

BUT

You have no legs.

Two words: Ninja. Cyborg. -press-

You are immune to fire

BUT

You will always smell like roasted meat.

It sounds very unpleasant but also practical. I think I will try and find another way to render myself fireproof though.

You gain a mirror which can show you what is currently happening in any location that you have ever seen before.
However;
While you gaze into it you age five times as quickly.

How do I put this lightly... No.

You gain a sword forged from a thousand fires and gifted with a gem of pure light to expel demons and witches.

But...

You become a big nerd in the process, making you ostracized from all your pears and people in general.

Eh, I don't see any need for those, pass.

You become great at Improv!

BUT

You don't find it funny.

Press! You never mentioned the extents and areas of the skill, so I take it to mean MacGyvering.

You get a week's supply of your favorite beverage for free and no strings attached.

BUT

You must first go a week with absolutely no food whatsoever — only water. Consuming any nutritional value will forfeit this prize immediately.

I could just buy my own for a dollar. Pass.

You are the chosen one to lead your people and mankind to the next generation.

But...

You are reincarnated into a Jewel Pet.

-shrug- As long as I have enough sentience to find out about my previous life, I'll take it. -press-

You are excellent at school/college/work

BUT

You suck at the more practical/fun things in life.

That would be a complete juxtaposition of my personality! Pass.

You find a cure for AIDS and are awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.

BUT

Another potentially lethal disease would become an epidemic which will have absolutely no cure.

Pass. And I think AIDS is dying out. But then again, I don't keep up with that.

You are the best at work/School

But

You suck with people skills

Pass. I mean, it's not like I'll need any more of what I already got.

You get to listen to the best song in the world

BUT

You have to listen to it until you die.

Pass. I'll probably go crazy.

You get to have your dream job!

BUT

You'll gradually turn into a purple elephant after a year and not be able to change back.