Yanderes and you

Remember your objectives:

1. -Survive.
-Her mental integrity should be kept at a reasonable level and maintained.
-She should still love you unconditionally.

2. Be sure to remind her how much you love her and basically compliment her as you would any women. Be careful about criticism, though, because she'll probably go a little over the top in attempting to fix this problem, and if she can't, she'll try to fix your perceptions of this problem instead. When prompted, re-affirm your hatred of those other skanky, dirty whores. Putting down other people is fun anyway, right?``

3. When she starts talking nonsense, she is being put under stress. This stress is based on the belief that you are being unfaithful or planning on leaving her. Pacify her with constant, unadulterated attention and sex. Remember that one of the best things about yandere is that they're completely devoted to you, so why shouldn't you return at least some of the favor? This entire fiasco can be summed up in a single line: It'll be great if he was nice and looked only at me. Yes, only at me. He can't look at any other girls. I'll look only at him, so he should look only at me. It'll only fair, right?

4. Contact with the opposite sex in public should be kept to a bare minimum — the assumption should be that she IS watching. When she's with you and you talk to other women, she'll either flaunt you in front of them or discourage prolonged conversation. In either situation you should play along, expressing your undying love for your yandere all the way. In the latter one you should cut off contact as soon as she gives a prompt to do so. Occasionally she'll become openly hostile to women she finds you speaking with, so diffuse that bomb before it explodes. Female relatives may or may not be accepted by the yandere, though for the sake of her facade she'll usually ignore them.

5. The yandere likes to do things for you, so keep her busy doing chores that make her feel she is strengthening the relationship. This is one of the best parts about the yandere since she'll spoon feed you if you ask her to and she won't even see it as strange.

Know how to maintain your yandere, it could save your life (and your neighbour's)!

1. Becomes unusually aggressive in seeking sex, she's probably done something bad and is now looking to celebrate her latest victory over the forces trying to take you away from her or ruin her happiness.
2. Becoming obnoxiously chatty, it means she's becoming stressed but it's not at the critical phase yet. Fix with some attention and re-assurances.
3. Stalks you — this is absolutely normal behavior for her; if she couldn't stalk you she would become quickly stressed.
4. Gets angry at you: her yanderu is emerging, and it's now critical that you bring her back down. Provide re-assurances, attention and sex constantly until she has no more signs of stress.
5. Becomes abnormally illogical or displays strange behavior: she is at the breaking point and is about to have a psychotic episode. Her emotions are in control at this point, and she's suffering greatly. She must be detained and made to hear your voice or she will eventually collapse.
6. Loses the light out of her pupils: she's lost it and she knows she can kill. She's fallen to a psychotic episode and in an effort to take back control of her mind she surrenders to her emotional impulse to kill, destroy or hurt. In this state she has more presence of mind, but her logic will become almost child-like. You must not display any fear or weakness, and you must talk to her gently while holding her gaze firmly. Her episode will subside.

Consequences of not treating your Yandere girl well:

1) Injury - Although your yanderekko loves you more than the air itself, she will occasionally lose it, and it is those moments that you have to be extra vigilant. Love can hurt, and if she was doing something like cooking, cutting your hair, lawnwork, or even knitting, then she has access to a deadly weapon. It is your job to make sure she puts it down and listens to you. Be careful here, or you might accidentally lose an eye.

2) Captivity - If you really really wuv your girl, this one probably won't happen, although there are a few special exceptions. Mostly, this applies to a guy who either never wanted, or is no longer able to handle the attention of a yandere gal, and has managed to push her into thinking she is about to lose him. Although alot of times this may force a violent response, there is a good chance that she will merely restrain you. At best, you might be tied to a chair in the kitchen for a while, as she tries to remind you why you are meant to be together 'til death. At worst, you will never see the light of day again in her special awesome dungeon where she won't even so much as let you take a whizz by yourself. There are some who might even relish this level of attention, but it indicates only the first crack in the yandere's psyche, and just tends to get worse from here.

3) Your friends/family 'vanish' - the most important part with most yandere, is that you are only paying attention to her. Only her, always her, all the time her. While there are a few who understand that you knew other people before you met, most yandere girls will find every other person you interact with as an affront to your special bond. Especially if these people are female. Be sure to find out very quickly what your girl thinks of the other girls in your life, even if its just a naggy little sister, unless you want to lose each and every one of them to an unfortunate meat cleaver 'accident'.

4) She dies - This is perhaps the rarest of consequences, but still worth a mention. Usually, anyone who truly loves their yandere won't have to deal with this, but if you are the type to mess around alot, this could happen. Not every yandere is automatically going to try and hurt you or others in order to achieve what she wants, some will immediately fall into a state of hopelessness. Once there, the idea of suicide is never far away. Not just any suicide either, it simply won't do unless you are able to see her die; consider it her final act of love that may or may not scar you forever.

5) You die - If you reached this consequence, lets face it, you fucked up. You were cheating on her, spending too much time with that neighborhood girl, or doting on your little sister a little bit too much, but you most certainly did something! This is usually a final resort, even for a yandere, meaning that you have been deemed completely unsalvagable in her eyes and there is no other way for her to get rid of the pain in her heart than by ending you. Suicide may follow, although that is probably not very important to mention at this point. A small note, you may have also been very unlucky on the draw and gotten a yandere that snaps just a little bit easily. In this case, your death is probably not too far off.

You're delusional