Battleship

It has Rihanna and Liam Neeson in it. I'm going to say it's real.

I would've preferred something like a story about a National Battleship Tournament a young boy takes part of, with spots of his imagination where the battleships are in an alien enclosure and can't see each other. A good framing device or something.

As it is, I'll wait till the $1.50 theater gets it.

Maybe Neeson lost a drunken bet?

Either way, I'm gonna see this in theaters if I can get the freetime for it. As it's coming out when I'll be in the Army.

Or maybe he wanted to do a movie that his kids could watch.

Doesn't he already?

Does he have a moral obligation against Narnia and The Phantom Menace?

Neeson's done kids things... And his kid isn't THAT young. He could see Titans.

His kids are teenagers now. They're probably at the age where action movies are the typical afternoon at the theatre viewing.

This is of the Transformers variety and teenagers watch this type of movie. Seeing your dad in one adds to the coolness factor.

edited 29th Jul '11 12:48:12 AM by Buscemi

...HE JUST DID CLASH OF THE TITANS!

Does Liam Neeson want to give his kids a whole marathon of crappy action movies?

Everyone is entitled to one or two bad apples. And if the kids liked it, then you did your job well.

Also, Sam Worthington did (and later had rewritten and recut) Clash of the Titans for his nephew.

I like Worthington for some reason.

But besides the point.

Rhianna... what's her excuse?

Rihanna's probably trying to create a second career as an actress.

But why isn't she trying to take a better movie that will probably get a better reception.

Rihanna could pull a Screw the Rules, I Have Money!. Seeing how Hollywood works...

From what I've read, Rihanna doesn't have a triple-digit IQ. She probably thinks this is high art.

How do you convince your agent to let you in Battleship The Movie!?

What the hell is going on...

Well now I just want a Monopoly movie. It should be very gritty and 'realistic' depicting two real estate tycoons attempting to buy out London and bankrupt each other.

I would also like a snakes and ladders movie. A gritty, survival horror movie of 4 characters stuck in a jungle full of snakes as they try to make their way out but they keep sliding down the snakes and get back to where they started.

They should already have known that this is going to be So Bad, It's Good at best and they still seem to have shoehorned a shitty love story into it.

I actually knew this Battleship movie was coming, because I read an article some time last year that a bunch of major studios had bought the rights to several popular board games. And Monopoly is one of them. I heard it's going to possibly be about a real-life real estate developer who gets pulled into the game somehow...or something like that...

I can't remember what other games they got their hands on, but this is all just absurd...

That actually sounds like Jumanji. It'll probably be stupid though.

Maybe Neeson wanted his "Snakes On A Plane" movie, you know, that one film with the silly premise that the main actor somehow makes work?

Look, until the damn ships cannot see each other, this is Battleship In Name Only. As far as I'm concerned, all the pegs are just a Shout-Out.

But yeah, this looks ridiculous.

edited 29th Jul '11 1:00:34 PM by Chubert

I'm surprised Michael Bay has no part in this.

Bay would want more explosive ammo than those pellets.

Maybe they explode when enough go in.

It's because of stuff like this Hollywood...Stuff like this! *waves fist angrily*

I wonder if I saw the same article as Frog . . .

Almost everything mentioned in it looked terrible, but I was kind of interested in the Clue remake. (Also, I was amused at its description of Real Steel as "the first bootleg toy movie"—it's not actually by the people who have the Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots license.)

I want to see this just to see if they manage to give the Battleship Iowa justice. I mean, in a battle with no radar but visual targeting? 16 Inch guns oh yes