"Even in the far future, when your grandchildren are using atomic calculating devices to send their greetings to distant planets, it will still be important to use good grammar and spelling. Whether today or tomorrow, be sure to have the correct greeting and subject line, and send it to the proper address. Tune in next time for another exciting adventure of the Mask of Justice!"
Next topic: Brushing your teeth.
Look at my magnificent teeth. Do you know what keep it that way? Good maintenance. Brush your teeth regularly, while they will still be inferior to mine, at least they will be healthier.
The next one is parking your vehicle neatly inside the line.
edited 20th Apr '11 9:34:23 PM by Blurring
If a chicken crosses the road and nobody else is around to see it, does the road move beneath the chicken instead?Cloyster cloyster cloycloycloy. *
edited 20th Apr '11 10:47:37 PM by PantheraSapiensEllipsis
MEHEHEHEHEHEHEHELook at me, now look at this rock, now look at your rock, is it crack, well then stop smoking crack.
Next one is on keeping your music volume up to high.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jXkI1sTDoEgWhen your on your hangover, you get headaches. people get headaches when you keep your music too high. turn it down!
Next PSA is on Learning to spell
I want flies in on a dragons!Heartfelt Announcement: Learning to maximise thy skills with the written word will serve thee well (unless thy profession is of the CRUSHKILLDESTROYCRUSHKILLDESTROYCRUSHKILLDESTROY variety!)
Next PSA: Breast Cancer Awareness
Woman: I have breast cancer!
Zombie: Let me fix it!
(turns the woman into a zombie)
Zombie: Problem solved. The lesson is: if you're gonna die, come to me and live forever.
Next PSA is about gun safety.
Usually here.Guns kill the Omnissiah's enemies! Use them when you're in danger!
Drinking Milk
edited 22nd Apr '11 4:15:39 PM by SantosLHalper
Halper's Law: as the length of an online discussion of minority groups increases, the probability of "SJW" or variations being used = 1.Milk, also known as La Leche, is a cool and refreshing beverage! Drink lots of it and vous can have a strong and beautiful body, just like moi! Sailor Piggy says, Kissy Kissy!
The next one shall be....writing bad fan fiction.
And in the name of Tropes, I will punish you!(Zombie reads a story that she wrote)
Boy: Miss? What's that on your computer?
Zombie: (too busy reading it)
Boy: "He had chained my wrist to the pole, grinning psychotically as the large, lumbering man watched me try to squirm my way out of the situation. "It is futile, tiny zombie!", he cackled, kneeling down in front of the pole, his hands grasping my shoulders. "It is best to accept it!", I gulped as I saw his face come closer and closer..."
Zombie: DOI! Um. Um. Um. You didn't see this!
Boy: Who was the guy in the sto-
(Zombie punches him in the face)
Zombie: Um, the lesson here is... if you write a fanfiction with yourself in it, be sure that it's only your eyes that sees it... and your doors are locked. Come to think of it, I don't have a door...
Next PSA is about PS As.
Usually here.*beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *BOOM*
Sepulveda: Sorry about that... the next PSA will be on the dangers of an out-of-control AI.
edited 23rd Apr '11 3:34:57 PM by Oblivion4568238
Jurassic Park is frightening in the dark All the dinosaurs are running wildAbominable Intelligences are blasphemy against the Omnissiah!
The next PSA is about Minecraft
Halper's Law: as the length of an online discussion of minority groups increases, the probability of "SJW" or variations being used = 1.-HISSSSSSS-
OH SHIT!
-Creeper explodes-
Play Mincraft like a normal man, and not all day, or you will die.
Next one is on The Beastie Boys.
edited 23rd Apr '11 3:40:47 PM by GearLeader
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jXkI1sTDoEgWhat? Ii don't give a 2hit about the fuckiing Bea2tiie Boy2. Ii mean, they're not bad or anythiing. 2crew thii2.
The next P2A wiill be on... Ii don't know... proper eye protection.
edited 23rd Apr '11 4:43:57 PM by Bindlestick
"You have more than enough potential. So tell me what is the one wish that would make your soul gem shine." -Mitt Romney, probably"I may drink a lot, but I still brush my teeth, so it doesn't hurt!"
next PSA is on Texting while Driving
I want flies in on a dragons!Texting while driving is tres dangerouse. If moi ever sees vous texting while driving I will break your arms so you can do neither. Sailor Piggy says, kissy kissy!
The next PSA is religious tolerance.
And in the name of Tropes, I will punish you!All religions are equal...ly wrong, aside from those who worship the mighty Olympians!
The next PSA is on smoking.
edited 25th Apr '11 5:02:23 PM by Vox
"Anyone who smoke's in this building will have their gender changed by automatic smoke detector raygun. Also photos will be taken and saved for later purposes."
a PSA about driving safely.
edited 25th Apr '11 5:06:33 PM by stevebat
Apocalypse: Dirge Of Swans.Not all British people drink tea. Neither do all of them say "blimey" a lot. Also, they don't come in just "cockney flavour" and "posh flavour"...there's also Geordie.
The More You Know
WH3N P1LOT1NG 4 HUM4N V3H1CL3, YOU SHOULD 4LW4YS B3 C4R3FUL TO 4VO1D D1STR4CT1ONS ON TH3 RO4D. 4ND N3V3R, 3V3R DR1V3 WH1L3 1N3BR14T3D. 1T'S 4 V3RY S3R1OUS CR1M3, 4ND L3G1SL4C3R4TORS L1K3 MYS3LF W1LL H4V3 NO M3RCY ON YOU
TH3 N3XT 4V4T4R W1LL G1V3 4 PS4 ON TH3 1MPORT4NC3 OF NOT CH34T1NG ON YOUR M4T3SPR1T
Life is like a game of Mahjong. Sometimes you need to take risks if you want to come out ahead.Infidelity is an ugly thing that can ruin a beautiful relationship. It always ends in tears, empty ice cream cartons and broken ribs. So, don't cheat on your lover. This goes double if you happen to be a certain little green frog. Sailor Piggy says, kissy kissy!
The next PSA will be about domestic violence.
And in the name of Tropes, I will punish you!22-Tan: Pwease don' huwd youw woved ones, ow I'wl cwy, 22! If you ignow my cwying, den I'wl hab to use Mistah Coppah!
Next PSA is about not listening to strangers.
Usually here.*bwop*
*Approaches glowing red cube*
User: viri(c): activate
SCREEEE—
Sepulveda: As this demonstration shows, the naive Darwinian approached the virus unknowingly, perhaps thinking it a beneficial item, and was quickly corrupted by it. Fortunately, this scenario is entirely under control, so no repeats of that other time. Send in the squads!
The next PSA will be on the dangers of forum ninjas.
edited 25th Apr '11 9:03:18 PM by Oblivion4568238
Jurassic Park is frightening in the dark All the dinosaurs are running wild
Ah. Well, I'm not the speechy kind of satyr, but reading is important. Without it, you humans are completely useless, unable to perform any kind of skill outside of breathing and making your... waste. On the other hand, us satyrs are able to function perfectly as illiterates, being able to create wonderful music and form ... Err... lasting relationships with fellow nymphs. As both a biblophile and a saytr, that almost makes me one of a highest forms of life, doesn't it? Oh dear... That was horrible... I sounded like so arrogant there. I apologize, just forget I spoke... or even existed. I'm sorry...
EDIT: Got ninja'd next is on writing a good e-mail
edited 20th Apr '11 7:47:11 PM by Tatsumar
Deer