Who Is Lord English? Not these guys
Vriska will become Lord EnglishBased on the recent appearance of a broken 8-ball(?) in relation to LE, and the fact that Doc Scratch really cares what she does. She is also arguably the most powerful of the trolls, and wants to be (or is) the one behind everything. For a little self-regulation, here's some points against: Doc Scratch apparantly tried to kill Vriska, though it's possible he knew it wouldn't kill her; Vriska doesn't want to be the bad guy, she wants to be the hero, even if that means creating the bad guy so she can beat them.
Vriska will create Lord EnglishBecause of many of the thoughts related above: She's powerful, Scratch cares what she does, and she's willing to create the Bad Guy so that she can them defeat them and be the hero. On a similar note......
Gamzee is Lord EnglishThink about it. He's called the "Most Important Character in Homestuck." He may well lead to the deaths of all the other trolls. On top of that, his ancestor was the Grand Highblood, which may make him large enough to fit in the Cairo Jacket.
Doc Scratch is Lord English merged with the First Guardian code.The original Lord English was unleashed on the Kids dimension. Somehow, somebody in the Alternia-verse managed to obtain his genetic code (probably related to Jack somehow, since he seems to be the only thing that moved from the Kids' world to Alternia-verse) and make it into a First Guardian - Doc Scratch.
Lord English is Sweet Bro and/or Hella JeffWell, think about it. Whenever Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff appear, they warp and distort the comic. Maybe Lord English isn't them directly, but was, at some point, somehow made with them. For evidence, I present the ominous passage found on this page.
Lord English is the bunny.Because why not.
Lord English is Diamonds Droog.His cold, calculating personality combined with his weapon of choice already fitting The Felt's theme, The Ultra Violence Cue-Stick, make him an obvious choice.
Lord English is Eddie MortonBased on this page.
Lord English is a Hero of Time from another, failed, Sburb session.And managed to escape the reset. Sorta unlikely, but still.
The anime girls found in the Squiddles static are unconscious parts of Lord EnglishThink Power Rangers or Captain Planet for a moment here. As the Squiddles are horror-terrors, inhabiting the Furthest Ring, at one time, they were alive and...humanoid to a degree. (cough...Slenderman...cough) As humans, we see Squiddles when they are Cthulu, and by extension, we see anime girls when those images are really their humanoid forms. As Hussie spoofs a lot of things in Homestuck, the anime girls will appear somehow in a future act as a spoof of manga and anime, and when these girls summon their zords or have their powers combine, Lord English descends. And, as this theory needs a bit of stupid to really be considered, a rare edition of Hunk Rump will be discovered to contain Penthouse-like letters working as an instruction manual/cheat sheet to ScRUMP, the new version of the session created by when the Kids and Trolls scratch occur, revealing Gamzee's cult to be behind Bard Quest's Dragon and behind the imprisonment of the the four Jail Broken prisoners, using Prince Persia Sword Time Shit to have them relive their nightmares until the Pony of Doom meets the Donkey of Despair and the cult feels rewarded by their efforts. Before anything like this happens, though, Lord English must descend, in the Kids-Trolls combined session, as this session is different from everything else due to the What Pumpkins of all Pumpkins, the Pimp-Coat-Kin, empowered by Nic Cage of all things, required for Gamzee's cult to attain their goals.
Snowman is Lord English
Nic Cage is Lord English
The Grand Highblood is Lord English.Motherfucker's huge. I could see him wearing that coat.
Lord English is Jade's grandsonDoc Scratch said that Lord English would arrange his own creation, because he's already here. Jade's grandson helped Jade send John's present which created the chain of sequences that led to this whole mess.
Lord English is Bec Noir.Why? Lord English is described as an indestructible demon that will utterly destroy everything upon his arrival. Bec Noir comes VERY close to that description, and has resigned himself to destroying everything that exists.
Lord English is Pickle InspectorLet's see, PI is very tall, has appeared in a ludicrous amount of forms and variations (One such form was a god), heck the poor guy even looks somewhat like a cuestick! ...This is highly unlikely, but the prospect of PI dressed in a huge green overcoat that's too wide for him with flashing cueball eyes was too funny to dismiss.
Lord English is Falkor from The NeverEnding Story.
Lord English Was Once a ManAnd he was Dave.
Lord English is WossyBecause if in real life, you saw an Englishman in that coat, and couldn't see his face, and were told to guess his identity, what would be your first thought?
Everyone is Lord English.Be it everyone in Sburb, or literally everyone. He is the living representation of the worst you could ever fall. That is why his true name inspires ultimate terror; discovering that it's your own.
Lord English is Betty CrockerAs of the latest updates, Nannasprite says Betty Crocker wasn't human. There's only one person diabolical enough to assume the guise of the batterwitch herself...
Lord English is an InfovoreOf the sort seen in Stross's Atrocity Archives. Both of them are 'summoned' with someone's death, and generally both of them will eat your universe when they arrive in it.
Lord English is completely unaware that he is Lord English - and, more specifically, Lord English is KarkatLord English is summoned upon the end of the world, and goes back in time to ensure the events that lead to his own creation. Thus, he exists solely to bring about the end of the world - but what if he doesn't realize this? Karkat has confessed to being the one who gave the cancer to the human's universe, and his actions have directly led to other failed timelines and bad things happening in the alpha-timeline. He could have been summoned as Lord English as a grub (when he would not be able to remember it) and sent back in time to Alternia - explaining his mutant-blood, as he was not actually born through traditional troll reproduction. He doesn't realize that he's solely responsible for the end of the world; he just is.
Lord English is to Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff as the Noble Circle of Horrorterrors are to the squiddlesAll of them clearly warp their respective realities- however, SBAHJ is far too light hearted to literally be Lord English. Dave will destroy the Green Sun/ kill Doc Scratch, and catch a glimpse (or more) of Lord English. This reverberates back through his life, and SBAHJ become his subconcious representation of a reality warper.
Lord English is the pocketsThe Felt are pool-themed. Doc Scratch is the cueball, the numbered members are the numbered balls and the Handmaid seems to represent the cuestick. The only things left are the table, the player, the rack and the chalk. Since Lord English is basically a Planet Eater turned Up to Eleven, he corresponds to the pool table's pockets.
Doc Scratch is Lord EnglishOr rather, Lord English is Doc Scratch. It's not a reverse Calvin and Hobbes-type thing. Lord English has been flash-stepping Doc Scratch all along to help arrange his own summoning. Logically, this must mean Bro is Lord English.
The Felt are Uranium beings.Interviews have stated that Uranium (The green grist) exists, and there are Uranium monsters. It seems that the Midnight Crew are Oil/Shale beings, so that the Felt can only be Uranium Gangsters. What happened to the Amber(yellow) and Chalk(white) Gangsters for the other elements? They're all dead.
When Jade enters the Medium, alternate universe versions of the Felt will appear.Tying in to the above theory, it's not implausible to think so, since we've seen alternate versions of the Midnight Crew in Derse.
The surviving members of The Felt are connected to (or are) the twelve TrollsWith the exception of Lord English, there are twelve remaining members of The Felt. Additionally, Spades Slick makes repeated mentions of confusing time-related shenanigans with respect to the members of The Felt;
Snowman is Rose's Mother
The Felt will become very significant in the troll intermissionThis is pretty much just a shot in the dark, but oh well. There has been discusion about the world ending in the trolls' session, such as here. Where have we heard of that before? That's right, Snowman. "If you kill her you destroy the universe." Coincidence? There's no such thing where Andrew is involved.
Doc Scratch's death will cause the scratchHe wants to die, so it's beneficial to him anyway. What happens when you pocket the cue ball? You scratch.
Doc Scratch's head is actually a mask/helmet. His secret identity is...Dad. Because why not, it's not like we know where he's from.
Destroying the Green Sun doesn't kill those connected to it, it simply removed their Guardian abilities and reverts them to how they were before.Jack will become a normal chess-doll-cat-bird-dog psychopath. Jadesprite will become a much happier dog-girl. Doc Scratch... who knows? Well, for one theory...
The Felt are frogclones made in the cloning labs by the kids and trolls.A recent update shows that the cloning lab is made not to repopulate the planets with people, but... with FROGS. Perhaps the Felt are strange frog clones made in these cloning labs.
Quarters is the bartenderBased on the 'Quart' in his name. He mixes sinister drinks in his BLENDER. His ability is to BLEND timelines together. He has multiple jars of liquid time.
Cal was used to make the 14 green members of The Felt.Moreover, the felt members would be Cal's imperfect clones. The time-related powers could easily be mutations of Cal's teleporting power from way, way back in Dave's dreams.
Doc Scratch wants the Green Sun destroyed to sabotage Lord English's plans.Doc Scratch has never once failed to complete his objective, and never will, and he cannot act against his objective, however First Guardians need the Green Sun as a power source, and will die without it. Doc Scratch is using Loophole Abuse and the dark spots in his virtual omniscience to rebel against Lord English, facilitating the destruction of the Green Sun to prevent new instances of himself from being spawned.
Clover and Quarters are the same personQuarters just appears less often. Perhaps even a fraction of the time. Bordering on the titular.
Whoever uses Quarter's "Quarter" can become himYou just have to be lucky for it to work, and Clover is VERY lucky. This also explains why Spades thought Quarters was dead before, when he really only killed the person using the coin.
Slick won't be the one to kill Snowman— but Jack (Bec) Noir will.Slick wasn't able to do it because his caliginous feelings for her were too strong: they'd built up their kismesissitude for years after being exiled and killing her would seem like a waste. He would basically rather put up with his huge bitch forever than end the universe, since doing so consequently ends the relationship. Jack, on the other hand, killed his version of the Black Queen using the first chance he got, and thus has no deeper attachment to her. Since Jack is confirmed for ending up in the troll's session, he will somehow run into Snowman and— mistaking her for his session's queen— kill her in his murderous rage, without realizing he's ending the universe.
Andrew will accidentally summon Lord EnglishSeems like the kind of thing he'd do. Especially considering how his current battle against Doc Scratch is going.
When Lord English is officially introduced, there will be two of him.One will be the Lord English that whose summoning was orchestrated by Doc Scratch, and the other will be the Lord English that was already there. Further upon that, the two Lord English will merge together to become a supreme being which will most likely be the True Final Boss.
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