Series / Christmas on Vesterbro

Jul på Vesterbro (Christmas on Vesterbro) is a Danish julekalender that originally aired in December 2003. It stars comedian Anders Matthesen in all roles. The characters include:

  • Stewart Stardust: Retired sailor and musician, now a hot dog vendor and alcoholic. Was beaten extensively by his father as a boy.
  • Vivian Stardust: Stewart's wife, who is never seen but stays in her room and screams "GO AWAY" whenever someone opens the door.
  • Danny Stardust: Son of Stewart and Vivian; drug addict and juvenile delinquent.
  • Randi: Danny's girlfriend.
  • Arne Nougatgren: Well-meaning, hippie social worker, who are assigned to the Stardust family case.
  • Greta: Stewart's landlady, who would like to see some rent soon.
  • Kefir: Middle-eastern mechanic who are really interested in Stewart's sausage vending stand.
  • Igor: Russian arms dealer with really rotten luck in love.

Provides Examples Of:

  • Accidental Misnaming: The terrorist Kefir has a name that is the same as a typical dairy product. Every time Stuart talks to him, he calls him by some other product (A38, Risifrutti, Yoghurt, so on), and Kefir always corrects him. It doesn't seem to be deliberately malicious as much as Stewart just not giving a crap. Subverted in the final episode, after everyone is all teary eyed and become friends, he actually calls him Kefir. Kefir is overjoyed.
    Kefir: You called me Kefir!
    Stuart: Sorry about that.
    Kefir: My name is Kefir!
    Stuart: Well, then I'm really sorry.
  • All Just a Dream: The plot is really just the archaeologist speculating about what had happened. What he actually knows is just that there had been a nuclear explosion in Copenhagen, and some things about the Danish culture in the beginning of the 21st century.
  • Beware the Nice Ones: While Stewart definately is a loudmouthed alcholic with little control over his life, he is generally mild-mannered and relaxed, and is very difficult to anger... But even the hardened armsdealer Igor flinches when he gets truly mad.
    • Kefir doesn't act menacing at all despite his plans of nuking Copenhagen, and acts politely and forgiving towards anyone up to the very end, which can be considered a real feat, since pretty much anyone acts likes jerks towards him and his family.
  • Cut His Heart Out with a Spoon:
    Igor: I am going to kill you in a very inventive way! I am going to pee in a paper cone, freeze it, remove the paper and STAB you with my own ice-cold URINE!
  • Flowery Insults: Stewart is an absolute master at these.
  • Hilariously Abusive Childhood: Back in the day, Stewart's "papa" always had a fatherly advice for every occasion...which he always punctuated by beating the young Stewart senseless with a blunt and/or heavy object.
    • This is used as a Running Gag where Stewart gets nostalgic and goes "Like my father used to say ..." followed by a black and white clip of the father beating Stewart senseless. The collected clips with English subtitles can be found here.
  • Interactive Narrator: The characters are able to hear the Narrator during his "On the Next" voiceover, and interrupt him with questions about the plot and his identity. In the penultimate episode, the Narrator gets fed up with the cast constantly heckling his voiceovers, emerges from within a closet in the scene and leaves for good, leaving the nearly-illiterate Danny with the task of reading the narration at the end of the episode.
  • Mall Santa: Arne gets Danny a job as a Mall Santa. Not a good idea.
    • Gets even worse, when Stewart fills in.
  • Not What It Looks Like: Invoked, then inverted:
    Arne: Stewart ... this is not what it looks like.
    Stewart: I sure as HECKFIRE hope not, because it LOOKS like you're porking the love of my life!
    Arne: Well, in that case ... it is exactly what it looks like.
  • Once per Episode: Vivian's "GO AWAY", Stewart reminiscing about his father, and other things, including the Running Gag with Steward's Christmas calendar (24 neatly wrapped bottles of beer - he appears to be equally surprised each day).
    Stewart: No... Why in all tarnation, you shouldn't have! Welp, merry christmas, Stewart!
    • The calendar is subverted in one episode, when it turns out Arne replaced the daily beer with herbal tea. Stewart is not pleased.
  • Reasonable Authority Figure: Played straight, then subverted, with Greta. She's really just a landlady who wants her money, and doesn't go around acting strange in any way. That is, until we find out she's a Nazi.
    • She DOES however make it pretty clear early on that she is incredibly racist, and every time she is actually inside the Stardust apartment, she spends ages ragging on Danny (which eventually transforms into a strange complimentary come-on about his physique. It's... bizarre).
  • Russian Guy Suffers Most: Igor is the Butt-Monkey of the show. Even when he shows up and threathens people with his Kalashnikov he gets no respect, but is beaten up and thrown out. And his song about his rotten love life is a true Tear Jerker:
    I sent her video films that Russians aren't allowed to see
    She sent me to a GULAG, the bitch was KGB.
  • Spit Take: Done with stew, when Randi tells Steward and Danny that Danny is the father of her child.
  • Talking to Himself: Played to the extremes. Not only does Anders Matthesen play every single role, he even has a Cameo As Himself.
  • Too Dumb to Live: Except for Igor (who probably planned to be far away at time of the explosion) and Kefir and his crew (want to become martyrs), everyone involved in the plot, really. Seriously, who decides that the best idea with a nuke is to leave it completely unattended in a hotdog stand. The police are the worst in this case. Greta gets one for eating a disgustingly dirty sausage and Ibrahim for saying "I'd rather die" when offered a sausage. What did you think would happen?
  • Wide-Eyed Idealist: Arne Nougatgren. He is a parody of a Stock Character in Danish comedy, the former hippie turned social worker/schoolteacher.

Alternative Title(s): Jul Paa Vesterbro