Recap / Walker Texas Ranger S9E17 "Medieval Crimes"

Medieval Crimes is the 17th episode of the Ninth Season on Walker, Texas Ranger. It aired on April 21, 2001.

Employees at a Medieval Times restaurant moonlight as fine art and jewelry thieves, and when one of the members of the gang is killed during a robbery, Gage and Sydney go undercover at the restaurant to catch the rest of the gang. In the B-plot, Trivette has to travel to Buell to pick up a prisoner named Morris Dobbs and bring him back to Dallas to testify in a murder trial, but he claims he is a jinx, at which point the two encounter many hijinks along the way.

Teleplay by Raymond C Hartung; Story by Chuck Norris and Raymond C. Hartung
Directed by Eric Norris

Tropes seen in this episode:

• Agent Scully: Dobbs claims he is a jinx, but pretty much everyone seems to have this role and dismiss this comment. Trivette most especially during his trip to Buell to bring him back to Dallas to testify in a murder trial.
• Anyone Can Die: The episode’s body count is as follows:
  • See Asshole Victim for the criminals’ deaths.
• Asshole Victim: One of the knights/burglars, Curtis Pollard, is killed after he is shot by Dallas Police officer Blanchard when he, Wiley and Hawkins rob a coin shop. Wiley and Hawkins shoot Blanchard afterwards, but are too late to save Pollard, fleeing in the getaway van in time. Blanchard is expected to recover from his injuries.
• Can Always Spot a Cop:
  • Averted after Gage’s first fight in the ring. Hawkins and Wiley grow suspicious, at first, about Gage’s cover, but they assume he once served time in Huntsville for armed robbery, claiming he didn’t know what he was thinking. Lucky thing Walker came up with a phony criminal record for Gage in order for the two to maintain their cover.
    Hawkins: There's something fishy about you, Swayze. You smell like a cop, so I did some checking. Guess what I found.
    Gage: Well, I'm not a mind-reader, so I don't know. What'd you find?
    Hawkins: You just got out of Huntsville, where we heard you were bronc-busting champion.
    Gage: You're a real Dick Tracy.
    Hawkins: So why didn't you tell us?
    Gage: First of all 'cause it's none of your damn business, and second of all, if the manager finds out I'm an ex-con, she's going to fire me, all right?
  • Eventually played straight when Hawkins’ girlfriend, Janice, recognizes Gage just before the match, since he once dated one of her girlfriends. Hawkins isn’t willing to take any chances.
• Con Man: Serge, who runs an art museum, and the first person Walker interrogates following the Palmer Museum robbery. He’s trying to go straight after Walker busted him for fencing stolen jewelry several years ago.
• Even Evil Has Standards: Wiley is more of a lover rather than a fighter; after he and Hawkins are arrested, it took him less than ten minutes to agree to testify against Hawkins in exchange for a plea deal, so that way all the stolen art and jewelry will be recovered. It is also heavily implied he and Lisa got back together.
• Faking the Dead: Blanchard, the Dallas officer who killed Pollard, recovered from his injuries after he was shot by Wiley, having faked his death.
• The Food Poisoning Incident: Trivette gets food poisoning after eating swordfish. He should've listened to Dobbs of how long it takes for it to ship.
• Heads or Tails?: When Trivette, Gage and Sydney examine the map of Texas in trying to locate Buell so one, two or all three of them can bring Dobbs back to Dallas to testify at a trial, they decide to flip a coin to see who's going to do it: whoever gets heads stays behind in Dallas, while whoever gets tails goes to Buell to pick up Dobbs. Sydney and Gage get heads, while poor Trivette, as expected, ends up with tails.
• The Infiltration: After the death of Curtis Pollard, Gage and Sydney are sent in undercover at Medieval Times to figure out the patterns of the knights moonlighting as thieves, since Medieval Times has seven other locations in cities across the country, and robberies took place at three other cities: Chicago, Illinois, Los Angeles, California, and Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. Gage’s cover is newcomer knight Jack Swayze, and Sydney, as always, will be a wench (waitress, in other words), being trained by Wiley’s girlfriend, Lisa.
• Ironic Echo: It takes about a few days to ship fish across the country. Dobbs said this to Trivette at the restaurant when they were sitting down to eat, now Dr. Ortiz, whom Trivette called when he started vomiting told him the same thing:
  You know how long it takes for fish to ship here?
• Just Got Out of Jail: A cat burglar named Floyd Jessup was released a month earlier from Huntsville for ripping off many rich people in Houston. Serge is trying to go straight, telling Walker about Jessup and claiming he had nothing to do with the Palmer Museum robbery.
• Just in Time: Walker arrives at the restaurant in time during Gage and Hawkins' match. Hawkins and Wiley plan to kill Gage after catching on to his cover with a lance made out of pine rather than balsa (which is standard use for all the knights), but he stops this in time. Who cares if a fistfight wasn't part of the script?
• Laser Hallway: The art thieves made their way through one of these during their heists at the Palmer Museum, but they never touched the floor, which prevented them from triggering the alarms. Hawkins is then notified the next day that he and his boys scored $200K from the paintings.
• Make It Look Like an Accident: After Hawkins and Wiley find out from the former’s girlfriend that Gage is undercover, the former is willing to make his death look like an accident during the match, making him play the role of the Black Knight.
• Never Bring A Knife To A Fistfight: In this case, it's never bring a sword to a fistfight, but why have a Sword Fight when you can have a good old-fashioned fistfight? While Gage beats down Hawkins, Walker deals with Wiley. It didn't matter if a fistfight wasn't in the script— needless to say, the crowd loved it!
• Offscreen Breakup: When Lisa was training Sydney for her wench job, she was seen earlier wearing a necklace that Wiley stole a week ago from a jewelry store, but Wiley broke up with her and he took back the necklace. Wiley was about to go to another castle soon. It is heavily implied Wiley and Lisa got back together after Hawkins is convicted.
• Plot-Driven Breakdown: Shortly after Trivette picks him up, Dobbs claims he is a jinx and that bad things happen to those around him. Sure enough, it starts with Trivette’s car breaking down in Alder Springs. Trivette doesn’t really believe Dobbs’ unluckiness caused it, saying by tomorrow, his car will be fixed and they’ll be en route to Dallas.
• Pursue the Dream Job: Wiley may have been dating Lisa and had given her the necklace he stole, but she has no involvement of his and Hawkins’ crimes, wanting to become a masseuse; they’re in very high demand since so many people get stressed out.
• Reasonable Authority Figure: The manager of Medieval Times, Philip Sands, hires the best people and usually tries to refrain from hiring ex-cons. He was so impressed with Gage’s fighting skills in the ring, he's willing to hire him if he retires from being a Texas Ranger!
• Scary Stinging Swarm: When Trivette calls Walker in a phone booth while en route back to Dallas with Dobbs due to the battery in his cellphone going dead, Dobbs warns him not to close the booth because there is a beehive inside. Trivette doesn’t listen to Dobbs’ warning and closes the booth. Sure enough, he gets stung like there's no tomorrow. Trivette is later seen at the end of the episode with his face bandaged after bringing Dobbs to Ranger HQ.
  Alex: Oh, my Lord!
  Walker: What the devil...?
  Trivette: Don't say anything!
  (Beat)
  Walker: That was Trivette, right?
  Alex: Have you ever seen so many Band-Aids on a human being before?
  Walker: Not a live one.
  (Walker, Alex, Gage and Sydney start snickering over this; then the Executive Producers' names appear and the episode ends)
• Shockingly Expensive Bill: Lampshaded when Alder Springs Police Chief Tucker comes to Trivette and Dobbs’ hotel room to check on the former after he ended up sick due to the swordfish and tells him he was hit with a bill of $800 to have his car fixed. The car was being fixed by his brother-in-law, Ernie.
  Tucker: Listen, about your car. You couldn't have broken down in a better place. That Ernie is a hell of a mechanic. And I ain't just saying that 'cause he's my wife's kid brother, now.
  Trivette: Your brother-in-law's fixing my car?
  Tucker: Oh, that's the good news. See, the bad news is, it's gonna cost a tad more than Ernie thought.
  Trivette: What's a tad?
  Tucker: $800.
  Trivette: That's a tad?
  Tucker: It always pays to do things right, now.
  • It just might increase after the car is fixed, since the axle was bent following a road test and a reckless driver sent him into a ditch.
• Shout-Out: Wiley and Hawkins corner Gage in the locker room with swords in hand, growing suspicious if he’s a Ranger, but assume he’s an ex-con from Huntsville. Gage has this to say after this assumption:
  Gage: You're a real Dick Tracy.
• Sore Loser: Trivette following the coin toss to determine who was going to Buell to pick up Morris Dobbs. He wanted a best two out of three, but Gage and Sydney decline.
• Special Guest: Jeff Yagher as Hawkins, Josh Holloway as Ben Wiley, Ernie Grunwald as Morris Dobbs and Stacy Hogue as Lisa.
• Sword Fight: Just as Wiley makes the lance switch during the next round, Gage gets back up and another knight gives him a sword so they can engage in a swordfight. Hawkins knocks Gage's sword out of his hand and Wiley is ready to kill Gage. Then again, why have a swordfight when you can have a good old fashioned fistfight?
• The Jinx: Morris Dobbs. Many won’t believe him, but it’s pretty much the truth. The first thing Trivette sees when he gets to the Buell Police station is a complete disaster area, with a Semi truck hitting the station in a freak accident, the front desk officer with his arm in a sling (he claimed to have slipped in the shower). Then it escalates with Trivette’s car breaking down, among other hijinks.
• Vomit Discretion Shot: Twice this occurs!
  • While spending the night at a motel while the mechanic fixes his car, Trivette is seen vomiting in the bathroom of his and Dobbs’ room after they ate at a restaurant. Trivette ordered swordfish, which was likely spoiled at Dobbs’ warnings, and as a result, ended up with food poisoning. The doctor said the same thing when Trivette called him during this time.
  • Dobbs also does this while he and Trivette are en route to Dallas after the car is fixed.
• What Happened to the Mouse?: It is unknown of what happened to Floyd Jessup after he was arrested by Gage and Sydney.