Recap / The Brittas Empire S4E7: The Chop

Mr. Brittas: That is life for you, Tim.

Tim: What?

Mr. Brittas: Life is not fair. It never has been.

Tim: But you said the whole point of the game is...

Mr. Brittas: In real life Tim, it doesn't matter how hard you work or what you believe in, it's all based on luck.

Tim: But you said that...

Mr. Brittas: You work hard, you give it everything you've got, but at the end of the day, all you actually do is roll a dice. You roll the right number, you succeed beyond your wildest dreams. Throw another number and it all goes down the sewers.

— Gordon Brittas explaining to Tim Whistler that Life Isn't Fair.

• Date First Aired: 28/02/1994

"Plan for the Future" fortnight is coming up, and Brittas has created a customized version of Game of Life to try to get his staff interested in pensions. Just then, Julie comes in with news - a man named Councillor Jack Drugget has just been anointed Head of the Leisure Services and he wants to see Brittas. Drugget is concerned about the loss of money the leisure centre is generating and he thus sees one solution - Brittas is to go. Of course, however, Brittas will have none of it.

Of course, however, events are already conspiring against him. For starters, Helen has brought a new former cabaret dog called Wayne under Brittas' nose. It's not too long before the dog goes loose in the pool and starts ripping off women's tops. Making matters worse is that she brought the dog using Brittas' money, creating a downfall in petty cash which gives Drugget reason to fire him. Brittas is able to fix this, but Drugget gives him a choice - either he takes the blame for taking the petty cash and gets fired, or Helen takes the blame and goes to jail.

It seems bad for Brittas, and matters get worse when it's revealed that Helen has gone missing. She is eventually found the next morning, hiding in the dog kennel. Brittas comforts her and reveals that he intends to resign. Making it worse, Carole asks Drugget for more cupboard space for Ben, which gets her fired as well. The episode ends with both Carole and Brittas leaving the centre and on to an uncertain future.

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Tropes featured in this episode:

• All Gays are Promiscuous: Tim snarks that Gavin, his boyfriend, should be lucky to call himself a virgin at all, implying that they have a very passionate sex life.
• "Begone" Bribe: Councillor Drugget tries to do this to Brittas, offering him a two year redundancy package, full pension paid up in full, and a good reference all so that Brittas can leave his job as Leisure Centre Manager and stop being an annoyance to him and his fellow councillors. For bonus points, Drugget is even willing to pay Brittas £10,000 if he leaves the county. Unfortunately for him, Brittas genuinely enjoys his job and isn't willing to ditch his job no matter the price.
  Mr. Brittas: I don't understand any of this.
  Drugget: It's very simple, Gordon. We want you out, and we're prepared to pay for it,
• Black Like Me: A Noodle Incident is briefly mentioned where Brittas seemed to resign, then went into the building disguised as a woman to highlight the sexism in the centre.
• Borrowed Without Permission: Helen borrows from the petty cash so that she can buy a dog, but doesn't ask Brittas first as he would have said no. Brittas has to point out that it still counts as stealing, a fact that Helen claims she has never been told.
  Helen: I didn't steal anything. I borrowed it. You've got the note.
  Mr. Brittas: If you don't ask the person first, Helen Brittas, it's called stealing.
  Helen: (Beat) What?
  Mr. Brittas: Borrowing without permission. Stealing, remember?
  Helen: (Beat) I've never heard that before. No-one's ever told me that — no one has ever told me that in my life.
• Call-Back: Helen's shoplifting habit and convictions of shoplifting, which was first established in "Sex, Lies and Red Tape", gets her into trouble again.
• Cardboard Box of Unemployment: After Brittas is fired, he can be briefly seen packing a box full of his personal belongings, including his manager nameplate.
• Continuity Nod: When Laura helps out at the Brittas' household after Helen goes missing, Brittas asks her to get back to "that man of yours". The man in question is Michael T. Farrell III, who had gotten back together with Laura only one episode prior in "Shall We Dance?".
• Crossdressing: During Brittas' Black Like Me Noodle Incident.
• Disguised in Drag: Apparently Brittas once pretended to resign, only to disguise himself as a woman to highlight the sexism in the centre.
• Dog Food Diet: After Brittas takes the heat for Helen's crime, they decide to stay in Wayne's dog house for a while and start eating his dog food.
• Downer Ending: Drugget is successful at firing Brittas and manages to get Carole fired as well.
• Early-Installment Weirdness: Winston is referred to as Wayne in this episode, with it only being later on in the series that he’s referred to as Winston. The possibility does exist that the Brittas family had another dog after him, since Winston does not appear on screen again.
• Fictional Board Game: The episode opens with the staff playing a customized version of Game of Life created by Brittas. From what we see of it, it involves designating characters as a "Wise Virgin" or "Foolish Virgin" and each player having to suffer a catastrophe every year. The players are also given three starting cards that show the player's aptitudes, genetic heritage, and socio-economical background. Although it was made to teach the importance of saving up a pension fund, it is later revealed to also teach that Life Isn't Fair.
• Firing Day: Drugget spends the episode trying to fire Brittas due to his running of the centre causing a loss in finances. Thanks to Helen buying a dog and taking from the petty cash, he succeeds. Carole is fired in the process as well when she tries to ask Drugget for an extension to Ben's cupboard.
• Friend-or-Idol Decision: Thanks to Helen stealing the petty cash to get a dog, Brittas is effectively forced with choosing between his wife or his job - he can either take blame for stealing the cash but lose his job in the process or don’t but see his wife go to prison instead. He chooses his wife.
• Hope Spot: After Laura leaves, the doorknob begins moving, making Brittas hopeful that his wife, who had run away from home, has returned. It's just Wayne with Brittas' shoes.
• Hypocritical Humour: This conversation between Brittas and Colin on the subject of Wayne and the pool.
  Mr. Brittas: Ah, ah, ah, ah. One other thing to learn about leadership, Colin, is that if there's a dirty job to be done, you don't get someone else to do it. You do it yourself.
  Colin: You mean, you want to do it, Mr. Brittas? [Mr. Brittas gives Colin a look telling him to just do the job] I'll go get me trunks and a polythene bag.
• Imagine Spot: Brittas has these frequently throughout the episode comparing his looming firing to getting his head chopped off. Later, when Helen is at risk of going to jail, Brittas imagines her getting her head chopped off.
• Kick the Dog: Drugget fires Carole after learning that she keeps her children in the cupboard and drawers behind reception, leaving her homeless, whilst apparently not even explaining to her why he's firing her in the first place.
• Life Isn't Fair: Tim goes up to Brittas to complain that the game they were playing was unfair (as he was getting worse off despite being sensible with his money whilst Gavin was spending money like crazy and is still rich). Brittas, who had only recently been threatened with a Sadistic Choice from Councillor Drugget, replies with the page quote.
• Nice Job Breaking It, Hero: If Helen hadn't bought that dog, chances are that Brittas would not have been fired in the first place.
• Noodle Incident:
  • Helen has been committed of two cases of actual bodily harm, although Brittas refuses to talk about them due to them being under sub judice. It is possible that one of them was for her headbutting of Philippa back in "The Christening", although it's never confirmed.
  • Brittas once seemed to resign, then went into the building disguised as a woman to highlight the sexism in the centre.
  • Helen has apparently run away with the children once or twice before the events of this episode. It is possible that one of the attempts was the one shown back in "An Inspector Calls", but this is never confirmed.
• Obliviously Evil: If what Helen says is any indication, she genuinely didn't realize that borrowing money without asking is considered to be stealing.
• Off with His Head!: Judging by his Imagine Spots, Brittas seems to compare being fired with having to put his head in a guillotine and getting it cut off.
• One-Shot Character: Winston/Wayne, the family dog that Helen buys.
• Open-Door Opening: Inverted - the last scene in the episode before the final Imagine Spot is Brittas and Carole exiting the building via the doors. For bonus points, the open doors start shining with a strong bright light, giving off the impression that they're heading into the light.
• Pet the Dog: Julie actually complements Brittas, calling him "honest", Granted, it was before the word "berk", but it's still more than she would usually do.
• Putting the Pee in Pool: It’s briefly mentioned that Wayne did his business whilst he was in the pool.
• The Runaway: Helen, at risk of a jail sentence, uses the opportunity to run away from her home. Brittas reckons she means it as she hadn't bothered to take the children with her, although it's Subverted when it turns out that she's just been hiding in the dog kennel the entire time.
• Sadistic Choice: Councillor Drugget gives Brittas one of these: Either he accepts responsibility for the irregularity in the petty cash and resigns from his job, or Helen (who actually took it to buy a dog) accepts responsibility and goes to jail. He takes the blame and resigns.
• Shout-Out:
  • The concept of a "Foolish Virgin" and "Wise Virgin" in Brittas' board game is a reference to The Bible, which had a parable called the "Parable of the Wise and Foolish Virgins".
  • Carole is briefly reading "Mental Disorders in Later Life" by Oscar J. Kaplan during Brittas' Life Isn't Fair speech.
  • A toy TARDIS is visible in reception.
  • "Pachibel's Canon" is used as background music twice, once when Brittas is sadly looking at a picture of him and Helen after she runs away, and during the final Imagine Spot at the end of the episode.
• Sinister Minister: Brittas believes that the current vicar would theoretically give up Christianity if he was given a huge enough sum of money.
• Spanner in the Works: If it hadn't have been for Helen buying a dog using petty cash, Drugget would have most likely failed in firing Brittas, as under the terms of the Employment Act of 1985, Brittas had less than the three written warnings required for it to succeed as well as the right to appeal.
• Stealth Pun: The reveal that Brittas took the heat for Helen and lost his job in the process takes place inside Wayne's kennel. In other words, he's in the doghouse.
• Sticky Fingers: Helen steals money from petty cash. Additionally, it's revealed that she has gotten nine charges of shoplifting on her record, which is why she is at risk of going to jail.
• Taking the Heat: Although it was Helen who took the money, Brittas tells everyone that it was him who took it so as to save Helen from going to prison.
• Taking the Kids: It's revealed that Helen has run away from Brittas several times prior, having taken the children with her. When she seemingly runs away again, she chooses not to take the children with her, which Brittas takes as a sign that she's being serious.
• Talking Animal: Subverted when Helen's new dog Wayne comes to the centre and asks for a ticket to the pool, which freaks out Carole a little bit. It turns out to be just Helen doing a little bit of ventriloquism, although this doesn't quite get through to Carole.
• Team Rocket Wins: Drugget succeeds in getting Brittas and Carole fired.
• Ultimate Job Security: Even though both Brittas and Carole are fired, they are rehired in the next episode, "High Noon".

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