Tan Lines
Ted is excited for Michelle and Henry's arrival in London. During training, Ted tells Jamie that he needs to pass the ball to his teammates instead of always trying to be the star. Henry and Michelle arrive in the middle of Ted's lecture, and Ted declares training canceled for the rest of the day. Meanwhile, Rebecca offers Keeley a job doing PR for the team, which Keeley accepts.
It soon becomes clear that distance has not helped Ted and Michelle's marriage. The morning of the match, Ted finds Michelle crying. She tells him that she wakes up every day hoping that she'll feel the way she did at the beginning of their relationship, and promises that she'll keep trying. Ted talks to Beard, Nate, and Higgins about the situation. Higgins advises him that "if you're with the right person, even the hard times are easy."
Before the game, Ted confronts Jamie about his attitude problem, but Jamie ignores him, saying that he is the only competent player on the team and doesn't care about being part of the group. They are interrupted by Henry, who asks Jamie to sign his jersey. Jamie does so and tells him that the next time he scores a goal, it will just be for himself and Henry. During the match, Sam is fouled by another player and appears to be injured, but Jamie does not ask him if he's okay even when Roy orders him to do so, leading to a fight almost breaking out between Jamie and Roy. Despite the fact that Jamie single-handedly scored both of Richmond's goals, Ted decides to bench Jamie, to the shock of the fans and commentators. Jamie storms off and goes home.
In the locker room at halftime, Ted tells the players that the current team environment is broken and needs to change. He gives a speech about how change can be scary, but it's a good thing and needs to be embraced. As he speaks, he realizes that the only way he can help Michelle be happy is by letting go of their marriage. In the final minutes of the game, Roy makes the extra pass to Sam, who scores and brings the team their first victory under Ted's leadership. After the game, Ted and Michelle mutually agree to divorce, and Michelle and Henry leave for the airport. Beard waits for Ted with two pints of beer, and the two of them drink together in supportive silence.
Tropes featured in "Tan Lines" include:
- Actually Pretty Funny: Rebecca shares a laugh with Keeley when the latter points out the double entendre of "men give each other jobs in toilets all the time".
- Artistic License – History: When Roy and Jamie come to blows, the commentators remark that they haven't seen anything like it since "2001 at Newcastle", seemingly referring to the infamous brawl between Lee Bowyer and Kieron Dyer
. Except that happened in 2005, and there had been similar incidents since, such as Stoke's Ricardo Fuller getting sent off for attacking teammate Andy Griffin in December 2008. - Bittersweet Ending: While the episode contains AFC Richmond's first win, Roy finally accepting Ted, and proof that Ted's strategy to make the team work more like a team instead of just giving the ball to Jamie works, it ends with Ted and his wife Michelle breaking up. Also, Jamie's continued selfish behaviour has now alienated him from the rest of the team, and the chances of him staying at Richmond or improving his attitude look bleak.
- Brick Joke: Ted brings Michelle and Henry to The Crown & Anchor and Henry runs off to play darts as Mae advises him to be careful about hitting anyone. Minutes later, Henry comes running back to the family's table and it's shown he missed the board and accidentally lodged a dart in Paul's arm.
- Dumbass Has a Point: Yes, Jamie was the one who scored two goals to keep Richmond tied, but Ted was right to remove him from the match because his selfish attitude was clearly demoralizing the other players and causing the team's overall performance to suffer. Without Jamie in the second half, the team plays better as a unit and wins the match.
- Everyone Has Standards:
- Played for Laughs when Ted and his family arrive at The Crown & Anchor - the regulars are ready to subject Ted to their usual verbal abuse, until Ted introduces his wife, and they immediately pivot and proceed to act like perfect gentlemen.
- Jamie's treatment of Sam after he goes down proves to be too awful for Isaac and Colin to accept and they lose all respect for him.
- Freeze-Frame Bonus: We can see that Roy is carrying around the copy of A Wrinkle in Time that Ted gave him.
- Friendship Moment: Ted finally earns Roy's respect after he pulls Jamie out of the match for his poor treatment of the other Richmond players and gets his first win.
- Huddle Shot: There's one in the locker room when the team puts their hands in for a cheer before the match against Watford.
- I Can Still Fight!: Invoked. When Roy checks on Sam after scuffling with Jamie, Sam reveals he actually feels fine but has been on the ground this whole time because everyone was making such a fuss. Roy then instructs him to pretend to limp before gesturing that he can play through it because the crowd will love it.
- It's All About Me: Talent demonstrated by two goals for Richmond aside, Jamie's celebration of pointing at the back of his jersey and screaming "ME!" is the epitome of how his arrogance has hit truly childish levels in the episode.
- Insult of Endearment: After Ted manages to get a win, the fans' constant shout of "wanker" becomes this.
- Kick the Dog: Not only does Jamie not check on Sam after he appears to be injured, he actually pushes Sam away from the ball so he can take the free kick unobstructed. Roy is so enraged by this that he starts a fistfight with him right there on the pitch until the refs pull them away.
- Lame Pun Reaction: Jamie provides two puns at his beer promo shoot when he first poses as a "brewnicorn" and then cradling his "beerby". The press folks are not impressed.Keeley: (whispering) Just drink the beer.
- O.O.C. Is Serious Business:
- In the locker room before the match, Ted starts telling Jamie he needs to cut the crap, only to be interrupted by Henry coming in and asking Jamie to sign his jersey.
- Roy instructs everyone to listen to Ted's halftime speech, showing that he's finally come to respect Ted and accept him as the team's manager.
- Oh, Crap!: Higgins is astonished that Ted wants to bench Jamie; his eyes go wide in shock.
- Stepford Smiler: Ted's wife is clearly trying to put a good face on things, but is really struggling in her interactions with Ted.
- Pet the Dog:
- Isaac, who previously liked to bully Nathan with Colin, invites Nathan to sit on the bench next to him during Ted's half-time talk.
- Beard, someone who previously implied cared very little for long-term romance, comforts Ted after he finalizes his breakup with Michelle by wordlessly bringing him a pint of beer.
- Those Two Guys: After Ted's terrible, draining talk with his wife, he sits down on the bench by the street and Beard walks up with a beer for him and the two share a little salute of tapping their beers on the bench.
- What the Hell, Hero?: With the exception of Rebecca, everyone in Richmond thinks Ted is a moron for taking Jamie off the field.
