"Damn Bundys" is an episode in the eleventh season of Married... with Children.
Al Bundy wishes to play for the Chicago Bears, and the Devil grants his wish.... only for it to fall flat on its face when Al is forbidden to play in the Super Bowl. Al persists, however, and winds up in Hell.
- All Just a Dream: After Al catches the ball in the football game in Hell, he wakes up back home, revealing the events of the episode to have all been a dream.
- And There Was Much Rejoicing: Marcy ended up in Hell because she was dancing by Al's open grave and accidentally fell in after slipping on some confetti.Al: How did you get here?!
Jefferson: It was a conga line. - And You Were There: After waking up from his seeming dream, Al tells the others he's back home.Peggy: Well, of course, you're home. Where the hell else would you be?
Al: Exactly! I was in Hell! [to Peg] And you were there. [to Bud] And you were there. [to Kelly] And you were there. And... [sees Marcy]] of course, you were there. - Anything but That!: When Al first gets to Hell, he doesn't find any of Satan's punishments all that scary and is even looking forward to an eternity in the underworld, as he's finally free of his family and the D'arcys. Then Satan tells him that his "permanent accommodations" are ready. Al opens the door...and sees his living room, complete with his family waiting for him (they died taking his body to the dump—er, cemetery). Al screams for mercy, but Satan just laughs—and the screams get worse when Marcy and Jefferson walk in as well.
- As Himself:
- Curtis Conway, Erik Kramer, and Raymont Harris as Al's incredulous teammates.
- James Brown interviews Al on the field of the Super Bowl and reacts to the final hit. Incidentally, this is actually Brown's second appearance this season, having appeared in the earlier Thanksgiving Episode (also as himself).
- Baleful Polymorph: Peg, Bud, and Kelly each end up partially transformed as part of their eternal damnation: Peg's hands are replaced with giant hooves (making her unable to use a phone and secure home shopping network deals that she would love), Bud's own hands are turned into claws (ruining his ability to enjoy his blow-up doll), and Kelly morphs into a monstrous gargoyle whenever a cute guy comes to pick her up for a date (and as soon as the guy leaves, she's restored to her true appearance).
- The Bet: To get his soul back and out of Hell, Al challenges the Devil to a one-on-one game of football, where the first touchdown wins. It's not clear what would've happened to Al if he had lost, but the Devil alludes to how he'll "turn up the heat" in that event.
- Captain Obvious: "It's hot as Hell down here," says Al after literally walking into Hell. The Devil's glance tells Al all he needs to know.
- Comically Missing the Point:
- At a Bears game, Kelly expects to see Yogi and Boo-Boo, as well as Smokey.
- When they're Down to the Last Play, Al tells Jefferson it's time for the Hail Mary. Jefferson starts the prayer, only for Al to say he means the pass.
- Cool and Unusual Punishment: Satan initially tries torturing Al by giving him Weenie Tots (which cause diarrhea) and telling Al he won't see his family again, but all three prospects delight him rather than harm him. Satan later brings the rest of Al's family (and the D'arcys) to Hell with him.
- David vs. Goliath: After getting his football challenge, Al expected to face the Devil one-on-one. Instead, the Devil recruited a team composed of those good at hurting people: Eric the Red, Atilla the Hun, Genghis Khan, Brutus, and the Lion (a really big guy that growls a lot). Al's team is composed of his family, Marcy, and Jefferson (all of whom panic in the face of these violent brutes during the first three plays). Fittingly, during the final play, Bud uses a makeshift slingshot to take down the Lion.
- Deal with the Devil: Al offers to sell his soul to the Devil so he can play for the Chicago Bears.
- Down to the Last Play: The group gets four plays to score a touchdown against the Devil's team, failing miserably the first three times (with Al naturally getting the brunt of it). A combination of guile tactics and the Hail Mary pass lead Al to score.
- Elvis Lives: Averted. Peg expresses certainty that Elvis is dead, saying she should be up in Heaven with him instead of down in Hell with Al.
- Everyone Has Standards: Insulting Marcy is one of the few joys he has in life, but even Al gets sick of repeating the same insult for 300 years.
- Evil Is Hammy: The Devil is played by Robert Englund, and he goes all out with the line delivery and laughing.The Devil: [as a vendor] Devil dogs. Deviled eggs. Deviled ham.
- Exact Words: Al's Deal with the Devil specified he would have the ability to take the Bears to the Super Bowl. As the Devil reminds him right before the big game, he never said anything about actually getting to play in the Super Bowl. Al loses all his newfound agility and fares so badly on the field that he dies.
- Fantasy Keepsake: When Al goes to talk to Lucifer about a deal to win the freedom of his family and the D'arcys, Lucifer gives him a pack of Red Hots (spicy cinnamon flavored candy) and then they make a deal to play a football game. After Al refuses Lucifer's offer to send him back not with his family and the Darcies' but with some babes and a fortune if he drops the football instead of scoring a touchdown, he regains consciousness on the kitchen table that he broke at the beginning of the episode. When he's called over to the living room to watch the NFL draft with the other Bundys and the D'arcys, he wonders if it was All Just a Dream, only to reach into his pant pocket, take out the box of Red Hots, looks at the camera and says: "There's no hell like home."
- Fate Worse than Death: Al has to spend eternity with the people he hates the most.
- The Final Temptation: Just before Al catches the ball to score the winning touchdown, the Devil freezes it. He offers Al a last-minute deal: catch the ball and be sent back home with his family and friends as promised, or don't catch the ball and be sent back instead with gorgeous women holding bags of cash. After the Devil resumes letting the ball move, Al takes a moment to think about it before going in for the catch. Possibly understandable as how he tricked him in their last promise.
- I'm Going to Disney World!: As the Devil takes him down to Hell, Al bemoans how he was supposed to go to Disneyland instead.
- Ironic Hell: Which they all have to suffer for 300 years.
- Peg can see all sorts of great home shopping deals, but her hands have been replaced with hooves, making her incapable of using the phone.
- Bud's hands have been replaced with lobster claws, causing no end of damage to his blow-up doll.
- Marcy has to be on the receiving end of the same insult from Al, with Jefferson getting slapped silly for joining in.
- Kelly's been turned into a gargoyle. Every time a good looking man comes over to take her out for a date, she morphs into a monstrous appearance and scares him away.
- And, of course, Al is surrounded by the people that drive him crazy. It's just like his life, only with more fire.
- Irony: After the last hit knocks Al out for good.Al: That was a helluva hit.
Devil: Ironic choice of words. - Laugh Track: Due to The Mask-like special effects making it impossible to film in front the usual Studio Audience.
- Lazy Bum: Peggy and Jefferson are so lazy that even the Devil lacks the power to make them get jobs.
- Mark of the Beast: On the Devil's football jersey, of course.
- Or Was It a Dream?: After scoring the touchdown in Hell, Al wakes up in the kitchen after he had landed on the table in The Teaser. With no one having a clue what he's talking about, Al figures it was just a dream, but then he sees he has the candy that the Devil offered him while in Hell.
- Raised Hand of Survival: How Al scoring the last touchdown is played. He dives into mist while trying to make the catch, with the hand holding the ball soon emerging.
- Shout-Out: Acting as Al's agent, Bud expresses irritation to a potential sponsor: "I said show me the money!"
- Take That!:
- When the Devil says he wants his soul, Al immediately agrees.Devil: Tom Arnold put up more of a fight.
- According to the Devil, he's the reason why Tiger Woods is so good at golf.
- The Devil is planning the construction of O.J. Plaza, specifically giving the foreman notes about the F. Lee Bailey Bar and the Kato Kaelin Lounge.
- When the Devil says he wants his soul, Al immediately agrees.
- Time Skip: Twice. The first skips over most of a typical football season in order to get Al to his disastrous and deadly Super Bowl game. The second occurs after Al is first shown his Ironic Hell, with 300 years then skipped over.
- Understatement: Ahead of the first play down in Hell.Al: This is sudden death.
Jefferson: [looks at the opposing team] No kidding.
