Title: Birth, Death, Love and Rice
Directed by: James Burrows
Written by: Heide Perlman
Air Date: September 26, 1985
Previous: Rescue Me
Next: Woody Goes Belly Up
Guest Starring: Kelsey Grammer
"Birth, Death, Love and Rice" is the first episode of the fourth season of Cheers.
Sam comes back from Italy and reports that his Race for Your Love attempt to stop Diane's wedding (Season 3 finale "Rescue Me") was a fiasco. He went to the Marino estate where Diane was supposed to be getting married, scaled the fence, met some guard dogs, jumped into a moat to escape the guard dogs—and found out that Diane and Frasier were getting married somewhere else. Then he got arrested. Then he was "purchased" by a local landowner...in any case, he's finally back. Sam tells the bar that he will murder anyone who even speaks the name "Diane Chambers", and the subject is closed.
A "many months later" time skip brings the arrival of one Woody Boyd (Woody Harrelson), an amiable hayseed from Indiana. It seems that Woody, who tended bar back in his hometown, wrote to some big-city bars some time ago looking for work, and got an answer from Coach, and they became pen pals. Woody asks about Coach and Sam delivers the bad news: Coach recently died. Sam, now tending bar by himself, offers Woody the job, and Woody accepts on the spot.
Not long after this Frasier Crane comes back to the bar. He shocks Sam by telling him that he and Diane didn't get married: instead, she ran away from the altar. Apparently Diane lived a life of hedonism after that, drinking and dancing on tables and swimming in water fountains, while Frasier came back home in humiliation, his life and career wrecked. Frasier pulls a gun on Sam, but after Sam notes that the gun isn't loaded, Frasier slumps on the couch in despair. He then delivers some surprising news, Diane has come back to America and is working at a nunnery just outside of Boston.
This is the episode where we learn that after Nicholas Colasanto (Coach) died on Feb. 12, 1985, The Character Died with Him. Woody Harrelson replaced Colasanto as the second bartender on Cheers and remained on the show through the end of its run.
Tropes:
- Actually Pretty Funny:
- Sam chuckles when Frasier recalled that during the wedding the minister asked Diane if she took Frasier to be her lawfully wedded husband and she responded by asking if "he was talking to her".
- Departing the convent, Sam quips he recognized one of the nuns and figures he's the reason she's there. Diane tries to keep from smirking at that line.
- Anti-Climax: The Race for Your Love Cliffhanger that ended Season 3 ends in anticlimax, with Sam coming back to the bar and sheepishly informing everyone that he got arrested in Italy and never even made it to Diane's wedding.
- Continuity Nod:
- The Running Gag about Norm trying to get Vera pregnant is ended in this episode when Norm tells the gang that they've quit trying. Norm is pretty OK with it; in fact he asked the gang to congratulate him.
- Frasier mentions his mentor, Dr. Bennett Ludlow, first mentioned in "Whodunit" when Dr. Ludlow knocks Carla up. Frasier is now Dr. Ludlow's patient.
- Cute, but Cacophonic: Diane screams bloody murder when Sam surprises her at the convent.
- Didn't See That Coming: Everyone is genuinely surprised to see Frasier set foot in the bar again.
- Establishing Character Moment: We learn all we need to know about Woody in his very first scene—he's a country hayseed, sweet and innocent like Coach, and a little bit dim like Coach. He's also very respectful of his elders, and he's young and athletic, as shown by how he puts one hand on the bar and pole-vaults over it to land inside.
- Everyone Has Standards: Despite his own conflicted feelings towards her, Sam sought Diane out because he was worried she had suffered another mental breakdown and says he wanted to make sure she was okay.
- Freudian Slip: When Frasier explains Diane's whereabouts, Sam slips with "My Diane?" before correcting himself.
- The Friend Nobody Likes: After recapping his anti-climactic bit of Race for Your Love, Sam vows to kill anyone that mentions Diane's name in the bar again. After Sam steps into his office, a new patron asks who Diane is. Sam immediately storms back out and demands to know who said that name, but it's Cliff everyone points at instead of the other guy. Sam chases after Cliff with zero hesitation, and no one particularly cares.
- Give Me a Sign: Torn with indecision after Sam leaves, Diane says a prayer, asking God to give her "a little sign" as to what she should do. Right after that Sam pokes his head back in the kitchen and asks Diane if the nunnery has a men's room.
- Hand Gagging: Sam has to do this after Diane sees him pop up behind her at the convent and lets out a scream.
- Irony: Frasier admits that, despite blaming him for Diane walking out, he still regards Sam as a friend.
- Lethal Chef: Sister Marie cringes when Diane says she got "creative" with the rice, and cringes again when she tastes it. After Diane asks her what she should do about Sam, Sister Marie says "Trust in God...I know I will."
- Literal-Minded: Woody says he and Coach were pen pals in that they sent each other pens. Sam finds this odd, until Woody says it was Coach's idea.
- Ma'am Shock: An unconventional example, as Carla is shocked to be called "ma'am" by Woody, not because it's a sign that she's getting old, but because she's unused to being addressed by "a term of respect".Carla: No wonder it sounded so weird.
- Person as Verb: When Sam doubts that getting dumped at the altar was as embarrassing as Frasier makes it out to be, Frasier reveals that now in Italy when you try to kick a soccer ball and miss, it's called "pulling a Frasier." If you fall down and knock yourself unconscious, it's called "pulling a Frasier Crane."
- Rhetorical Question Blunder: Sam interrupts Diane's prayer to ask where the men's restroom is.Diane: Sam, would you put a men's room in a convent?
Sam: Right now I would, yes! - Runaway Bride: An embarrassed Frasier returns to the bar and reveals that Diane ran away from the altar in Italy.
- Shout-Out: After telling Sam how Diane went around Italy dancing on tables and swimming in fountains, he says she's "doing penance for La Dolce Vita".
- Simple-Minded Wisdom: When reflecting on Coach's death, Sam recalls the man's thoughts on the afterlife: "I hope there's not a lot of stars." Diane says there's a certain wisdom to it, and Sam says remembering this line helps him deal with the loss.
- Taking the Veil: Sort of. Diane is at St. Anselm's Abbey with the "Sisters of the Divine Severity", but she isn't a nun, she's just cooking and cleaning for the nuns.
- Time Skip: A "MONTHS LATER" time skip takes us from the resolution of the Season 3 cliffhanger to the arrival of Woody Boyd at the bar.
- Tranquil Fury: Played for laughs in the cold opening. A gleeful and chipper Sam returned from Italy and told the bar about his failure to stop the wedding, being attacked by dogs, jumping in a moat, being arrested for trespassing and bailed out (or "purchased") by a landowner. He also threatened the life of anyone who mentioned Diane's name. All with a big grin on his face.
- Weapon for Intimidation: Frasier pulls a gun on Sam but is mortified when Sam is observant enough to look at the barrel of the revolver and note that it isn't loaded.Sam: Ah, wait a second. What are you doing? The gun's not even loaded.
Frasier: Certainly it's loaded.
Sam: No it isn't.
Frasier: Oh, of course you know it's not, because Frasier Crane is a harmless person, who never caused you a moment's concern, not a moment's worry, who was never a threat to your relationship with Diane, and he isn't a threat now. Is that it, Sam?
Sam: (points in the gun's direction) No, it's just that the little holes there are empty.
Frasier: (sighing) Once again you're ahead of me, Sam.
