Radar: Hairspray

There's so much in this movie (e.g., "Hey, baby! You look like you could use a stiff one!" During a hairspray plug.) that we have to make a page for it. Examples:

  • "I'm sorry, Prudy, but some of your personal stains need poundin' out with a rock!"
    • In one scene, Velma takes padding out of one girls top. Then she proceeds to reach down to a guys crotch, he then says that he can "take that out himself."
    • In the stage show, just before that, "We do NOT touch ourselves ANYWHERE while on camera!"
  • The reasoning for the need for a new member for The Corny Collin's Show.
    Corny: So how long are you going to be out?
    Brenda: Just nine months.
    Corny: We need a girl who's just as fun lovin', but maybe not as free wheelin'! (wink)
    • Made even funnier/edgier when you consider two things: Brenda is (like Amber later on in the film) wearing a circle of gems that signifies that a girl is a virgin, and just prior to the exchange, she's arguing with CORNY COLLINS. That is, it's heavily implied that Corny is the baby daddy.
  • A couple examples on "I Can Hear the Bells": An anti-smoking sentiment in the shot of all the teachers smoking in the lounge, then a Gilligan Cut to a skeleton (which takes a few viewings to catch). "Won't go all the way, but I'll go pretty fah-ar" she sings—to her Driver's Ed instructor (who looks appalled). And the VERY suggestive way Link licks his hand as Tracy sings about French-kissing.
  • From Velma's villain song-
    "Those poor runners up might still hold some grudges, they padded their cups but I screwed the judges!"
  • How about Velma's title as Miss Baltimore Crabs? Considering that she screwed the judges, she might have... picked up something from one of them. Except crabs are pubic lice, not a disease, and the crabs refer to BOTH kinds, as Baltimore is a seaside town with a fishing industry (check the little crab on her crown).
    • From the 2007 film: "I risked communicable diseases, she'll definitely risk prison."
  • One of the lines of music from the HIGH SCHOOL script of the stage show, though oddly, not on the album.
    Velma: (to Tracy) With your form and your face, well, it isn't your fault. You're just caught with a case of Miss... Baltimore Crabs!
  • There's one in the "New Girl in Town" song.
    "We're kinda sad and blue,
    yes it's true girl
    We'd like to say... [two Beats]
    to the new girl in town"
  • The chorus of Seaweed's song is entirely about this, with tons of Where Da White Women At? implications.
  • In "Timeless To Me", the final line on the album's version is Edna saying "Wilbur, honey, let's take this upstairs". In the script, the reprise includes the lines "You're rounding third base now" / "Holy cow!".
  • In the dodgeball scene, Seaweed comments on how Penny's gum-chewing must "make the muscles in [her] mouth mighty strong".
  • Just before "Run And Tell That", Seaweed has this little gem, which somehow made it into the high school version of the script:
    Penny: The nurse is out sick, but look what Seaweed found!
    Seaweed: Band-aids and Q-tips! And a rubber. No, I guess that's mine.
  • From "Ladies' Choice":
    Link: Hey little girl take me off the shelf/'Cause it's hard having fun playing with yourself'
    Link: I'm the prettiest package you ever did see/Take me home and then unwrap me...
  • In the 2007 musical, there is a shot of Penny's mother reading aloud from the Bible during the opening of the pageant. The passage she's reading happens to be about Lot's daughters conspiring to get him drunk and have sex with him.
  • Link in the opening credits of the original. He is using a copious amount of hairspray and he is positively organic, complete with licking his lips, rocking his body, and having a very satisfied look on his face after.