Film — Live-Action
"My public love dogs. One pitch with a hound is worth ten thousand words. That mutt didn't do Roos-e-velt any harm, did it? Or Dick Nixon, either."
— Lonesome Rhodes, A Face in the Crowd
"You're an orphan from a basket in the middle of the desert, and I took you for no other reason than I needed a sweet face to buy land. D'you get that? So now you know."
—Daniel Plainview to his son, There Will Be Blood
Live-Action TV
"Hey, pop. Been awhile. Did you see that motorcade pull up? It's the first time that the President of the United States has visited Gaffney. Can you believe it? Oh, I wouldn't be here if I had a choice, but I have to do these sorts of things now. Makes me seem 'more human.' And you have to be a little human when you're the President."
—Frank Underwood before pissing on his father's grave, House of Cards (US)
Web Original
At one point, Trump boasted about how much veterans adore him. To prove it, he trotted out a gorgeous brunette who was carrying a perfect stack of white paper topped with a bow. I swear it looked like an unwrapped package of blank Hammermill printer paper.
—Drew Magary
, "What Kind of Person Would Vote For Donald Trump? These People"
, "What Kind of Person Would Vote For Donald Trump? These People"Real fucking brave of Nike to dump a retired athlete well after they'd squeezed every last useful promotional drop out of him, in his doping prime. It's not exactly a huge sacrifice for Nike to cut Armstrong loose today. There are no more Tour de France wins to capitalize on, and now they get a cheap way to stake out the moral high ground, where Nike never, ever belongs. The false naivete is almost blinding. WHOA HEY NOW THERE'S INSURMOUNTABLE EVIDENCE! WE CAN'T STAND FOR THIS HARRUMPH HARRUMPH HARRUMPH. Like Nike didn't know ages ago that Lance rode up the Pyrenees with four million cc's of oxygenated dinosaur plasma stuffed into his veins. (Meanwhile, according to Greg LeMond's wife, Nike once paid a former UCI president $500,000 to cover up positive drug test.) Poor, innocent little Nike! They feel so BETRAYED by Lance! They couldn't possibly known that he was doping in a sport in which EVERYONE dopes. They were far too busy lashing Honduran child slaves with Air Jordan shoelaces to notice!
—Drew Magary, "Nike Dumps Lance Armstrong In The Smarmiest Way Possible"
, "Nike Dumps Lance Armstrong In The Smarmiest Way Possible"Our owner, who inherited BILLIONS when ol’ Bud “Two Fingers” Adams passed away, made a show of donating $1 million to relief efforts when the tornados hit Nashville in February. This is the equivalent of somebody who makes $60,000 a year donating $60 (except that the hypothetical second person actually earned their money by working.) Thanks for your table scraps, lady who lives in another state! #NashvilleStrong
Pimp Mama Kris recently said that her main prized pig Kim Kuntrashian has such a giving soul (more like giving hole) and always quietly gives to charity without getting any attention for doing so. Pimp Mama Kris proved to be right yesterday when Kim graciously took a break from her busy schedule of being the whoring whore of all whoring whores to feed the homeless at the Los Angeles Mission while surrounded by a team of bodyguards, half a dozen paparazzos, a make-up artist, a hairstylist, a camera crew and the souls of a dozen dead turkeys eye rolling at this blatant publicity stunt...Just look at this transparent trollop dressed like “real people” and acting like she didn’t drop that ladle and run to her chauffeured SUV the minute the cameras stopped clicking.
Real Life
"I am a man who is basically opposed to atrocities or ungentlemanly actions. In 1934, I promulgated a law against vivisection. You can see, therefore, that if I disapprove of the experimentation on animals, how could I possibly be in favor of torturing humans?"
—Hermann Göring at the Nuremberg Trials
