There is probably no more terrible instance of enlightenment than the one in which you discover your father is a man — with human flesh.
Scrooge: I'm not used to relatives either. The few I had seem to have... disappeared.
Huey, Dewey and Louie: We know how that feels, Unca Scrooge.
Kitty: Eric, I'm sure she's not abandoning Steven. She's his mother!
Eric: Mom, her exact words were "I know I'm your mother, but I'm abandoning you Steven."
"Okay, basically, my parents abandoned me, I was being raised by ocelots."
— Dr. Doofenshmirtz, Phineas and Ferb
Father left home, poor mother died
Leaving Susie alone
Grandfather's soul too had flown...
No one to care...
— Michael Jackson, "Little Susie"
Natsuru: Oh, of course. The missing parents. What is it this time? Dead? Fugitives?
Natsuru: Oh, okay.
— Kämpfer Abridged
Daryl: Do you have any family movies that have families in them?
"No, you know what, uncle Phil? I'll get through college without him, I'll get a great job without him, I'll marry me a beautiful honey and I'm having a whole bunch of kids. I'll be a better father than he ever was. And I sure as hell don't need him for that, 'cause there ain't a damn thing he can ever teach me about how to love my kids!"
Silver: Didn't your pap ever teach you to pick your fights a bit more carefully?
[Jim looks away]
Silver: Your father not the teachin' sort?
Jim: No. He was more the "taking off and never coming back" sort.