Quotes: Max Payne
"Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to present Max Payne; New York's Finest, with the biggest mobster bodycount ever! Dearest guests, prepare to die."
— Vladimir Lem, Max Payne 2, announcing Max's arrival via microphone to the mooks invading his soon-to-be restaurant.
"One last thing left to do. I was compelled to give Vlad his gun back..." *Dramatic Gun Cock* "...one bullet at a time."
— Max Payne
"What do you mean he's unstoppable? You are superior to him in every way: You are better trained, better equipped, and outnumber him twenty-to-one. Do your job."
— Nicole Horne
"They were all dead. The final gunshot was an exclamation mark to everything that had led to this point. I released my finger from the trigger, and then it was over."
— Max Payne
"Max. We've gotta stop meeting like this."
— Mona Sax
"The flesh of fallen angels! Am I dead? Am I alive? I don't know!"
— Valkyr Addicts
"This is love. When someone drags you from the wreckage when you have given in, ready to just lie there and die. This is love. When someone, no matter what the cost, shows you there is hope, a choice, that you can put down your gun. This is love. Love hurts."
— Max Payne, from Max Payne 2
"You will never feel stupider than when you're lying on a heap on the floor wondering if it's worth asking the surviving armed thugs if they wouldn't maybe mind maybe amusing themselves for a few minutes while you get up, reload, and relocate your shoulders. Other great moments in my hall of fame include attempting to dive through a window that wasn't actually a dive-throughable window, which did nothing to help the comparisons between Max Payne's face and that of a pug in a front-loading tumble dryer, and a couple of occasions when I attempted to burst out into a corridor of hostiles guns blazing but crucially misjudged the position of the door frame."
— Yahtzee, Zero Punctuation
"If there's no light, it ain't a tunnel. It's a hole."
—Max Payne 3
"There it was, the soundtrack of my life. And, for a few seconds, came harmony."
— Max Payne, upon finally managing to play his theme on piano in the third game.
"I felt like the Angel of Death. I looked like a fat bald guy with a temper."
— Max Payne 3
"So in the end I guess I had become what they wanted me to be: a killer, some rent-a-clown with a gun who puts holes in other bad guys. Well, that's what they had paid for, so in the end, that's what they got. Say what you want about Americans, but we understand capitalism: you buy yourself a product and you get what you pay for. And these chumps had paid for some angry gringo without the sensibilities to know right from wrong. Here I was, about to execute this poor bastard like some dime-store angel of death, and I realized: they were correct. I wouldn't know right from wrong if one of them was feeding the poor and the other was banging my sister."
— Max Payne, ruminating on the most recent lesson he's learned
Victor Branco (Laughing) You know I'll walk!
Max: You'll walk... with a LIMP! (breaks knee)
— Max Payne 3