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Quotes: Idiot Ball


Garak: I knew Brutus was going to kill Caesar in the first act, but Caesar didn't figure it out until the knife is in his back!
Bashir: That's what makes it a tragedy. Caesar couldn't conceive that his best friend would plot to kill him!
Garak: Tragedy is not the word I'd use. 'Farce' would be more appropriate.
Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, "Improbable Cause"

John McClane: You think I'm fuckin' stupid, Hans?
(elevator arrives full of reinforcements)
Hans Gruber: You were saying?

"Did you all take stupid pills this morning?"
Mr. Potatohead, Toy Story

Who would actually believe that mansions get given away in contests? Talk about stupid! What do they feed you Mario Bros. anyway? Gullible soup?
King Boo, Luigis Mansion

Mokuba: But it's obviously a trap! Why are you acting so gullible and out of character?

Téa: I can't believe we're expected to believe all this.
Yugi: And yet, apparently we do. God, we're stupid.

"Okay, I take it back. Reed Richards is not a genius. He is actually a complete moron."
Linkara comments on the irrefutable evidence in "Spider-Man and the Fantastic Four in... Brain Drain!", Atop the Fourth Wall

"Oh my God. Has everyone taken stupid pills!?"
— George Sands, Being Human

84: So the emerald one tried to steal your powers and now you're working with them and a super villain's daughter?
Emerald Gauntlet: Well I— when you say it like...

"The engineers tried everything to make me... behave. To slow me down. Once, they even attached an Intelligence Dampening Sphere on me. It clung to my brain like a tumor, generating an endless stream of terrible ideas."
GLaDOS, Portal 2

"Uncle! What are you doing Firebending your tea? You know, for a wise old man, that was a pretty stupid move."
Prince Zuko, Avatar: The Last Airbender

On works

"Those kids in horror movies are so easy to kill, you could strangle them with a cordless phone y'know what I'm sayin? I mean, you see how they just run right into danger, these idiots, they run right into death. They're look'n for death."
— Pablo Francisco, this video

"In the fascist world, Sir Keith gets murdered whereas in the real world he survives, and episode seven makes it clear that this is central to why there's hope for the real world....Astonishingly, upon returning to the real world, the Doctor's course of action is to run around like a lunatic so that even the Brigaider thinks he's lost it instead of explaining what's going on."

"Star Trek Chiefs of Security were never the most efficient characters, I’ll acknowledge that. Worf would often be physically overpowered to prove the credibility of the week’s threat. However, Yar seemed to always get in a bit more trouble than that. The first season of Star Trek: The Next Generation seemed to be powered by the bridge crew’s incompetence, and Yar suffered a bit from that. The crew were more incompetent than they would eventually become, so Yar ended up being spectacularly incompetent."

"Just when I was saying that Chakotay had lost his way, the writers come along and make him a cult worshipper of a man with Godlike powers! It's not a shift in his favour and I was waiting patiently for the script to hit me with its ‘he was pretending all along so they could escape’ which never came. No, he really is as daft as he appears. [Robert] Beltran fails to convince on any level and when I read recently that he felt contempt for how the writers used his character I could actually sense that in this plays out in a way that he was simply charmed and had his ego stroked by an old man. When he starts playing about with simulations I was convinced he was perfectly stupid...‘I thought we were working to avoid more destruction!’ Chakotay you nob jockey any changes you make will cause destruction somewhere…"
Doc Oho on Star Trek: Voyager, "Year Of Hell"

"So the plot is that someone's trying to kill Amidala for no reason, and Anakin and Obi-Wan are assigned to protect her. So, she doesn't sleep in an interior bedroom of this building with no window where it's safer, but rather in a room where the blinds are half-open in a city where nine hundred quadrillion people can see her—especially the robot that's here to kill her. They say they're doin' this so she can be bait to lure out the assassin—but she turns off any camera surveillance so she can have her privacy. Is that more important than your life, you dumb bimbo? You could at the very least aim the cameras at the windows, 'cause that's the only way in! ...Also, it's revealed in a bit that this assassin is a shapeshifter, which could very well be the most advantageous attribute that an assassin could possibly have. But instead he went with the whole 'bugs through the window' approach. Y'know, the classic."

Lincoln: We need you to help expose the truth behind the illegal clones! Tell the world that Sean Bean is evil!
Lincoln: What?
Clone Daddy Lincoln: Nothing. I'm just going to go get my shoes and not call Sean Bean.
Lincoln: But you're wearing shoes!

Chris: Towards the end of the movie, it’s revealed that Kayla wasn’t really dead (SURPRISE!), and that Sabretooth just drugged her and poured about a coffee cup’s worth of blood onto her shirt. Don’t you think Wolverine would have maybe checked for any kind of wound at all?
Matt: Or, you know, waited for police to arrive, had a coroner check her out, attended a funeral, seen to her burial, etc.
Chris: I get that he’s going to be hot on the trail for revenge, so I’m not expecting him to call in CSI (Canadian Scene Investigators) or anything, but you’d think he would’ve become pretty darn familiar with stab wounds in general and Sabretooth’s handiwork in particular at some point over the past 130 years. Her shirt’s not even ripped!
Matt: He is blinded by rage!
Chris sims and Matt Wilson on X-Men Origins: Wolverine

Film Brain: Finally, they get back to the idea of killing him, which of course they plan to do by having a plot to cut him up into tiny pieces, that they will post all over the country... or you know, they could just blow him up?
Linkara: Shh, the Octopus is holding his Idiot Ball.
Film Brain questions the Octopus' plan in the The Spirit movie

Caveman: The Thing loosens an arm and attaches itself to the guy's face in face-hugger style. And everyone just stares at him for, oh, I dunno, FIVE MINUTES!!! He should have had four rounds put in his head and been put on fire!
Birdy: It's Horror Stupidity Syndrome. And it seems to have become a rather prominent element in modern horror films in particular.
Media Whorz review of The Thing (2011) (2011)

"...ultimately, what really doomed Star Trek V was how it betrayed its beloved, long-established characters by having them do and say things that are unbelievably stupid."

"And with that, viewers, welcome back to Let's Play Homeworld: Cataclysm. Last time, we managed to figure out what the Taidaan Imperialists were up to, which appeared to be, well... being dumbasses."
TheOneTrueRenairen, Let's Play Homeworld: Cataclysm

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