"I've developed this thing about bunnies. Well, bunnies, chocolate, snails... trashcans, Italians (Roberto Benigni)—this show is not healthy for me."
"A guy walks into a talent agent's office and says he has an act. The talent agent says, ok, what's the act? So the guy just whips out a DVD of A Serbian Film and puts it in. And they both watch it, and the talent agent says, wow, that's a hell of an act. What do you call it? And the guy says, ART."
"(After The Nostalgia Chick has beaned him with a baby doll) She only keeps me around because I'm funny when I'm hurt. I am the punching bag that laughs."
"We as a culture have become so desensitized that sex with animals has become funny. We [have] grasped the concept and mocked it."
-on Vase de Noces''
"This was not made, it was committed. It cannot be screened, it can only be inflicted."
-on Sweet Movie
"TANKS! SHAKESPEARE WITH TANKS! I LOVE THIS!"
— on Richard III
