Funny: Trainspotting

  • Sick Boy and Renton casually, almost disinterestedly watching the home porno of Tommy and his girlfriend. Of course, Harsher in Hindsight when the theft of the video inadvertently leads to their breakup and Tommy's downward spiral and eventual death.
  • Renton shooting the dog in the nuts with an air-rifle.
    Sick Boy: For a vegetarian Rents, you're a fucking evil shot.
  • The bed sheets scene. Nausea Fuel doesn't quite cover it.
  • Spud's speed-fuelled interview.
  • Begbie discovering the girl he's feeling up in a car is a transvestite.
    Begbie: I'm not a fucking buftie and that's the end of it.
  • Tommy trying to get Renton, Sick Boy and Spud to go on a walk with him up some mountains.
    Spud: Tommy...this is not natural, man.
    (Cut to Tommy stood in a green field with hills in the background)
    Tommy: It's the great outdoors!
  • The constant use of the word "cunt" in the book is taken to such extreme levels in Begbie's narrative chapters, that at times you can't even tell who he's talking about.
  • In Porno, Begbie, hours away from being released from prison, denies the food the screw brings him. Seconds later he's asking his cell mate for some of his food.
    Begbie: Give us some of your fucking sausage then ya cunt.
  • Renton and Spud casually strolling into an old folks' home and taking the telly out from a room full of pensioners.
  • "Perfume" James' One-Scene Wonder in the book, where he cheerfully informs Gav, who has given Second Prize a ton of money to paint his living room, that a heavily inebriated Second Prize has just bought a stack of perfume off him.
  • Begbie claiming that Renton is 'spoiling it for every cunt' when he says he doesn't want a full English breakfast. The absurdity of the comment just makes it laughable.
  • In Skagboys, Renton and Sick Boy write and send a fake letter claiming to be from the council to the Currans, a racist couple who used to live next to Renton's family. It informs them that Mr. Ranjeet Patel and his family will be moving into their house as part of a new scheme to help homeless people get off the streets, under the banner of Cultural Unification for New Tenants Scheme. It takes a turn for the worse later when one of the Currans has a heart attack after angrily ranting and raving about the letter.
  • Begbie describes June as having "a face like a painter's radio" after he's ejaculated over it in Skagboys.