- Elsie (Miss Sensitivity), while Marlene is crying hysterically.
Elsie: Is she sober?Mr. Stringer: Yes she's sober! I've been with her all aftern... When... I... Uh... I saw her w... Yes, of course she's sober! Don't be stupid!
- The head chef shouting about a mouse in his trousers.
- Ms Irvine's magnificent WTF face when she enters the dining room and sees all the mice running around.
- From the book: the Grand High Witch has this when one of the witches wonders if the Formula 86 Delayed Action Mouse Maker recipe requires one alarm clock for each child to be transformed by it.
"Idiots! If you are vonting a steak, you do not cook the whole cow!"
- Just about anything the Grand High Witch says, given her outrageous accent.
- A random witch compliments the Grand High Witch's (disguised) new look. The Grand High Witch responds, "You're too kind... I wish I could say the same for you."
- Bruno's father and his obnoxious attitude towards the hotel staff. His thick Scottish accent just adds to it.
- Marlene slips into the Grand High Witch's room and spots a bottle of Formula 86. Mistaking it for perfume, she dabs it on her neck. During one of their secret trysts, Mr. Stringer tries kissing her on the neck, only to back away in disgust. Marlene then looks in the mirror and sees she's grown a patch of fur on her neck. She also squeals like a mouse, most likely because the formula sunk into her vocal chords. That's what you get for pinching from your guests!
- Mr. Stringer finding the Grand High Witch transformed into a mouse. He whacks her with a butcher knife and she explodes in a cloud of green smoke and gunk, some of which gets on his face.
- He also grabs a mouse in hand, but instead of killing it, he just tosses it across the room.
Funny / The Witches