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Funny: The Professional
  • The Professional has a darkly funny moment in which corrupt cop/Psycho for Hire Norman Stansfield pauses in the middle of raiding a drug holder's apartment to discuss classical music with the owner.
    Stansfield: We said noon - I've got one minute past. (A long silence) You don't like Beethoven. You don't know what you're missing: overtures like that get my... juices flowing. So powerful. But after his openings, to be honest, he does tend to get a little fucking boring. (He laughs) That's why I stopped!
    (He sighs and turns to the thugs behind him.)
    Stansfield: Toss the apartment.
    (As they start ransacking the place, Stansfield continues.)
    Stansfield: You're a Mozart fan- I love him too. I looooove Mozart! (In a very bad German accent) He vos Austrian you know? (In ordinary voice) But for this kind of work.... (He mimes playing the piano on the mantlepiece) he's a little light. So I tend to go for the heavier guys. Check out Brahms- he's good too.
    • For a regular comedy moment: Mathilda just fired six shots at random. Cut to Leon and Mathilda walking down the street, carrying their belongings.
    Leon: Mathilda, don't you ever do that again or I'll break your head. You got that?
    Mathilda: Okay.
    Leon: I don't work like that. It's not professional. There is rules!
    Mathilda: Okay.
    Leon:And stop saying "okay" all the time. Okay?
    Mathilda:Okay.
    Leon: Good.
  • The scene in the unedited version where Leon gives Mathilda a target practice lesson... in the middle of a drug dealer hit. You can hear the guy murmur "What the fuck is this?" in disbelief a couple of times until Leon puts him down for good.
The Princess BrideFunny/FilmProject Million

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