As a Moments subpage, all spoilers are unmarked as per policy. You Have Been Warned.
- In the opening, after Renfield narrowly saves Dracula from being burnt to a crisp by the sun after killing the bishop and the vampire hunters:
- Caitlyn tries to defend ska music to the support group, which causes her to realize just how "fucked up" her boyfriend has made her.
- Later, Rebecca's partner expresses his own opinion about ska music.
Chris: Ska's not dead... fuck. - Teddy talks on the phone about his accomplice "Apache Joe."Teddy: He cuts out people's tongues with a hunting knife. You tell him his name is racist!
- Rebecca spotting Teddy Lobo trying to drive through a DUI stop.Rebecca: That's Teddy Lobo.
Chris: You don't know that.
Teddy: Do you know who I am?! I'm Teddy fucking Lobo!- Teddy flees the traffic stop clutching several bricks of cocaine and shouting "I've got a prescription for this shit!".
- Then he tries to get rid of the cocaine in his car by throwing it at the cops. One of them explodes on Rebecca's partner's face and he screams in terror.
- The Running Gag of Renfield accidentally interrupting stories from Carol.Carol: Fuck Carol, I guess. I hate her too.
- Renfield comes home to his new apartment to find Dracula there waiting for him, but Dracula can't enter a location unless someone invites him in. Renfield then looks back outside to the "Welcome! Come right in!" mat he placed in front of his door....Renfield: ...Shit.
- What makes this even better is that this weakness is not alluded to at all beforehand. The movie just trusts the audience to be aware of this limitation and makes a joke about it. (Dracula does suffer this weakness in the source material, but Our Vampires Are Different provides innumerable alternatives, even for the Count himself.)
- When Dracula walks into the support group, he gives a cheeky eyebrow wag at Renfield to emphasize that yes, he's going to do exactly what Renfield thinks he's going to do (i.e., massacre everyone).
- When Dracula suggests a busload of cheerleaders, Renfield asks if he specifically wants female cheerleaders.Dracula: Don't make it a sexual thing.
- The very Nicolas Cage delivery of Dracula yelling “I'M the real victim HEEEEERE!” to Renfield.
- When Renfield confesses to Rebecca who he's been working for.Rebecca: Dracula? Count Dracula?
Renfield: No, President Dracula. (Rebecca points her gun in his face) Yes, sorry, Count Dracula.- Later in the same conversation:Rebecca: So your job... is to bring people to Dracula... so he can eat them.
Renfield: [meekly, and somewhat offended] I do other things.
Rebecca: Like what, do you also wash his cape?
Renfield: No, it's dry-clean only.
- Later in the same conversation:
- The Lobos and their underlings watch on cameras as Renfield tears through their soldiers. Most of them cringe but one, revealed in a deleted scene to be "Mandy Lobo" who is a Torture Technician and the daughter of Bellafrancesca, applauds like she's watching her favorite sports team win.
- Renfield drops from a balcony to stomp on an enemy, giving Rebecca a friendly little wave as he falls past her.Rebecca: You know when something crazy happens and someone's like "It's okay, I've seen way worse"? Everything I've seen you do today is going to be my "way worse".
- As part of Renfield's Good-Times Montage, he's briefly shown gifting an ant to a neighbor's child who owns an ant farm. Later, when the police and Lobos are coming for him and Rebecca, Renfield has trouble finding an insect that would give him the power to fight, until he sees the same child waving at him through his apartment window. Cue Renfield breaking down their door, snatching the ant farm from the kid and proceeding to devour the entire colony as if he were scarfing down a bag of chips.
- When Teddy offers to take Dracula to his mother, Dracula starts laughing maniacally, with Teddy awkwardly joining in.
- After becoming a familiar, Teddy activates his powers by snorting up a centipede like a line of coke.
- During their fight scene, Renfield attempts to warn Teddy that his newfound powers will eventually cause him to become Dracula's slave. Teddy, while trying to insist this won't be the case, proceeds to subconsciously refer to Dracula as "master", instantly proving Renfield to be correct and leaving Teddy stammering as he realises what he just said.
- Renfield defeats Teddy by kicking him in his midsection so hard that he spews blood from his mouth AND explosively shits himself.
- The protection circle that captures Dracula was made out of cocaine. Rebecca got the instructions off a Wiccan Tumblr.Renfield: Well, thank you Wiccan Tumblr.
- Dracula's last words are "Hail Satan!" while throwing up the horns like a rock star.
- After Dracula is captured, Renfield and Rebecca kill and dismember him, mix his ash first with holy water and then with concrete, separate the concrete into several ice cube trays, and dump the resultant cubes in the sewer because there is so much conflicting lore on how to kill a vampire and because Renfield has personally "seen him come back from some crazy shit".
- Dracula makes a series of increasingly outlandish demands about what... who he wants Renfield to bring him for dinner.Dracula: I want... unsuspecting tourists! A handful of nuns! A BUSLOAD of cheerleaders!
- Later, Renfield is at a restaurant scoping out possible prey for Dracula. Guess what he finds?Renfield: [as a busload of whooping cheerleaders pulls up outside] Really?
- Adding to the hilarity is that Renfield sees perfect examples of ALL THREE victims types Dracula named: what looks like a tourist couple, four nuns eating at their own table, and the bus of cheerleaders which pulls up right after that.
- After fighting off the Lobos, Renfield is basking in his being celebrated as a hero when he suddenly hears Dracula's angry voice in his head, making him wonder if it's still too late to grab one of the nuns.
- Later, Renfield is at a restaurant scoping out possible prey for Dracula. Guess what he finds?
- When Dracula is discussing his plans to take over the world with Renfield, he claims it will be a world where there is absolutely nothing but Dracula...before pausing and adding Renfield as well. He's even tacked a little Post-It note on his planning board underneath his own name saying "and Renfield".
- At the very end, Renfield and Rebecca have revived the massacred support group with Dracula's blood, and after Mark thanks him for it, he trails off a bit about how they've all "seen things that can't be unseen, know things that can't be unknown", while never dropping his cheerful, support group leader tone of voice.
- The very last shot of the film is what's left of Dracula's blood sitting on the support group snack table in a Rubbermaid drink pitcher labeled "Dracula's Blood".
