A character list for The Heilwald Loophole. Needs Wiki Magic Love.
The Cast
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Joseph Randolph
The chief doctor of the Heilwald Klinikum and successor to Friedrich Erlenmeyer, Doctor Randolph is somehow responsible for the strange terrors that have befallen the building and its staff.
- Broken Pedestal: Ever since taking the role of head doctor, it's made increasingly clear that the charismatic Randolph doesn't know a thing about medical ethics. It's implied that he may have even cheated to get his position out of a massive pool of applicants, seeing as his published research paper is riddled with errors.
- Exact Words: No one dies at Heilwald, all right.
- Faux Affably Evil: He's perfectly calm and collected when leading the player to his office - just don't try and run away from him.
- Hoist by His Own Petard: The anesthesia syringe he uses to sedate the player is the same way they take him down.
- Lack of Empathy: This is his medical sin, according to the broken oaths puzzle. He views the patients at Heilwald as medical subjects rather than as people, leading him to bizarre experimental treatments such as his obsession with removing patients' livers.
- Mad Doctor: "I'M NOW GOING TO REMOVE YOUR LIVER!"
- One-Winged Angel: Randolph's form at the end of the game has him twisted into a horrifying monster.
Nurse Heideltraut
The nurse residing over the Klinikum's sick ward.
- Body Horror: Her head has been stretched out like a xenomorph's, and one of her legs is now a metal crutch.
- Foil: To Nurse Anne, according to the broken oaths puzzle. Both are guilty of breaking the same medical oath, the one against "the twintraps of overtreatment or therapeutic nihilism". Heideltraut neglects her patients and pretty much just makes sure they're not disturbed, while Anne overtreats her patients with torturous therapy.
- Silence, You Fool!: If you ring the bell in the sick ward, she'll storm right up to you and knock you out.
Nurse Anne
The nurse residing over the Klinikum's electroshock therapy ward.
- Electric Torture: When she catches the player, she applies what looks like a defibrillator to your head and starts it up.
- Electroconvulsive Therapy Is Torture: The kind of therapy she practices is unnecessary and cruel to most, and you wouldn't be wrong to judge her for it. But considering her personality and the things said about her, she helped to take away some of the pain for the patients. At least before everything went to hell.
- Foil: To Nurse Heideltraut, according to the broken oaths puzzle. Both are guilty of breaking the same medical oath, the one against "the twintraps of overtreatment or therapeutic nihilism". Anne overtreats her patients with torturous therapy, while Heideltraut neglects her patients and pretty much just makes sure they're not disturbed.
- "Open!" Says Me: She loudly and casually kicks open any door in her path.
- Psycho Electro: Arguably applies to her. She's also so loaded with electricity that she makes an audible buzzing noise, and the sound of static electricity is heard whenever she walks.
Eduard Sauer
As the Klinikum's only chef, Sauer cooks and serves meals to all the patients. His surly attitude and reputation for serving borderline-inedible food is well known throughout the cafeteria.
- Body Horror: He's a naked man trapped in a perpetually boiling pot.
- Lethal Chef: Saeur's Fleischsuppe is both notoriously bland and extremely vile. Any time the player tries his cooking, seasoned or not, they'll pass out and wake up in the courtyard outside. The fact his Ironic Hell punishment is to be boiled alive and serve his own flesh as soup for eternity also seems to imply he wasn't the most hygienic cook back when Heilwald was a normal hospital. This fits with the broken oaths puzzle, where his medical sin was breaking the oath to prevent disease.
- Mysterious Past: No one knows how he ended up doomed to boil for all eternity. Even the Ominous Voice isn't sure how he ended up that way.
- Mystery Meat: Seeing as his entire body is stuck inside his cooking pot, it's not hard to guess where at least some of the meat comes from.
- Sir Swears-a-Lot: Though he doesn't talk much, nearly every sentence out of his mouth has a swear or two. Given that he's constantly being boiled alive forced to serve soup made out of his own flesh, his aggrieved attitude is at least understandable.
Wolfram
One of the doctors assigned to the Badehaus, Wolfram oversees aqua therapy alongside Nurse Astrid.
- Face of an Angel, Mind of a Demon: He has an admirable physique, and both is one of the few still normal-seeming members of the staff and presents himself as easy-going and laid-back. However, multiple sources inform you he was abusing his patients, and the manner in which you end up caught alone with him after the rest of the therapy group leaves, the way he mounts you to sedate you, his obsession with you being free of sweat and body odor, him locking you in the showers alone with him, the leering and grotesque appearance of his "brusher" form, and the fact the broken oaths puzzle indicates his medical sin was failing the oath to prevent the spread of disease, all heavily present the subtext of sexual abuse. The Ominous Voice outright calls him the only member of staff who was actually already evil even when Heilwald was a normal hospital.
- Karma Houdini: Despite being previously fired over allegations of abuse, he has since been rehired under Doctor Randolph.
- Meaningful Name: Possibly. While 'Wolfram' is a fairly widespread Germanic name, it gives off rather unpleasant animalistic vibes with this guy.
- One-Winged Angel: Depending on whether or not you took a shower, he'll transform into either a humanoid showerhead or a leering giant with a brush for an arm after he catches you and drags you into the showers.
- Token Evil Teammate: The Ominous Voice describes him as the only member of the staff who was already evil even before Randolph turned the hospital into an Eldritch Location.
Doctor Hauser
An estranged doctor who basically lives in the attic.
- Greed: He's not just overly protective of his books. He considers anything that ends up in his territory to be "his", and reacts violently if someone tries to take it back. He even laid claim to Dokhu's teddy bear and refused to give it up, either lying to Dokhu that he didn't have it or straight up threatening him to go away.
- Insufferable Genius: The Trash Collector calls him a condescending asshole, and he does talk down to you when you speak to him, though he's not overtly hostile... at least until you take something from his attic.
- Offscreen Teleportation: When he's pursuing you, he'll teleport ahead of you if you get too far ahead of him.
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here: When everything started going to hell, he packed as many books in his personal library as he could carry and fled to the attic with them.
Nurse Helene
- Only Sane Employee: Aside from her rapidly increased walk speed, Nurse Helene is one of the few Klinikum staff to not have mutated abilities, nor is she ever hostile to the player.
- The Reliable One: Helene's duties are to care for those in the patient hall. Not only is she actually doing her job as a healer, she requests the player find medicine and rewards them for helping.
Nurse Astrid
- Body Horror: Given that all what you get to see of her is her arm sticking outside an iron lung, it may be for the best that you don't get to see the rest of her.
- Defector from Decadence: She was the only member of the staff to speak out against Randolph and Wolfram. Somehow she ended up crammed inside an iron lung for her trouble.
- Non-Malicious Monster: She pursues you in the old ward, but only because she thinks you're Joseph Randolph. If she catches up to you, she'll just sadly say "Wait, you're not Joseph" and then break down crying, with your character only able to say "I... I'm sorry" at her condition.
Nurse Sabine
Trash Collector
The Trash Collector lurks in the Klinikum's courtyard, scavenging for garbage to eat. Notably, despite his frightening appearance, he's one of the few people to actively help the player - although it's possible he may not be affiliated with the Klinikum itself.
- Bizarre Taste in Food: He loves eating trash. He even has preferences on what types he likes to eat!
- Body Horror: Between his stooped posture, abnormally long limbs, and constantly twitching head, the Trash Collector can come off as rather uncanny.
- Creepy Good: Despite his mutated appearance, he's actually one of the few friendly faces you'll meet at Heilwald.
- Even the Rats Won't Touch It: For being a person who eats literal garbage, he draws the line at Sauer's cooking.
- Everyone Calls Him "Barkeep": The Trash Collector is only ever known by his title.
- Extreme Omnivore: The guy eats trash. That said, even he has his limits. If you feed him broken glass, he'll eat it without hesitation, but it will kill him a short while later.
- Mr. Exposition: In exchange for garbage, the Trash Collector will tell the player snippets about the Klinikum's doctors and past.
Neglected Patient
A chronically constipated patient of the Klinikum and one of the few recurring patients.
- Everyone Calls Him "Barkeep": Neglected Patient is, well... a neglected patient.
- Jerkass Ball: It's hard to say why he'd summon Nurse Heideltraut on the player for not getting him a glass of water.
- Nobody Poops: Pretty much inverted with him. He's pooping just about every time you see him.
- Running on All Fours: He's fast when you first meet him, outrunning the player with a sudden Scare Chord. Thankfully, he's not hostile.
- Sophisticated as Hell: The Neglected Patient has a very polite way of speaking before referring to a toilet as a "shitter."
- Toilet Humor: Most times you see the Neglected Patient involve his constipation and the massive, toilet-destroying messes he makes. Exaggerated with his... gift to the player in the Badehaus, which is an entire swimming pool filled with a mountain of feces. It even has a toilet on top!
Friedrich Erlenmeyer
The former chief doctor of the Heilwald Klinikum. He resigned from his position after 34 years of service.
- The Ghost: Erlenmeyer's existence is mainly proven through the documents the player comes across. As the Trash Collector notes, not even a single portrait of Erlenmeyer remains - nor any of the chief doctors before him.
