Awesome / Zoofights

Although it could be argued that Zoofights is a Crowning Moment for the internet and Something Awful in general, some moments still manage to stick out. Add more examples, Elohim commands you!

Expect unmarked spoilers.

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    Zoofights I 
  • Mechos and Darth Gorilla invoking the Conservation of Ninjutsu and defeating Two Hundred Radioactive Tarantulas With Jetpacks and Party Hats. Especially awesome since the spiders had been winning with sheer numbers up until then.
  • The entire finale where the surviving combatants face down borderline Eldritch Abomination Swanmass, an event that would go on to become a staple of future Zoofights tournaments.

    Zoofights II 

    Zoofights III 
  • The first Zoofights to feature artwork, the third installment is chock full of awesome and memorable fighters.
  • Steam Crab's Chest Burster attack against Reannimamut, made doubly awesome since it looked like the undead mammoth had won.
  • Oh The Huge Manatee, an eyepatched badass war veteran whose superior skill and tactical thinking (To say nothing of his suit of advanced Powered Armor) won the day repeatedly.
  • When Steamcrab and Oh The Huge Manatee were pitted against each other in the third round, the resulting fight was pretty much guaranteed to be awesome all the way through. And it was.
  • The final battle against From Hell, where Oh The Huge Manatee, Steamcrab, Bisondreadnought and Stockbridge and Barrington (the two drunks) all sacrifice themselves to destroy the nightmarish monstrosity. And all of it was set to Nine Inch Nails' Just Like You Imagined.

    Zoofights IV 
  • The Loser's League match between Once Were Walrus and Hyperfauna - a single mutant with no special abilities pitted against a gigantic Eldritch Abomination. This match won the Walrus a lot of fans.
  • The final battle, a two-fights-for-the-price-of-one affair that includes cameo appearances from Once Were Walrus and Bisontrain, albeit not as you know them...
    • Once Were Walrus in general. He refuses any and all surgineering enhancements after his first defeat, going through all his subsequent fights with some a crate of beer, some grenades and a shotgun.
  • In Zoofights 4, one Goon roleplayed Strong Bad, Bubs, Strong Mad and Strong Sad. Strong Sad meets three of the Doctors, receiving a little lecture and becoming more optimistic and hopeful. When Strong Bad is beheaded in the final battle, Strong Sad uses his new strength of character to bring him back to life. It gets even more Crazy Awesome from there.

    Zoofights V 
  • The first time, the last time, and - let's face it - EVERY time Croctopus builds a boat.
  • The entire battle between Croctopus and The Sturgeon General is exceptional. It's even bookended by Youtube videos... and you need to watch the ending video to see who wins.
  • The ending of the fight between Punchules the Magnificent and Banebarramundi. Despite having a broken spine, Punchules summons the willpower to drag himself across the arena and slice Banebarramundi's venom tubes with a spare spine that he had packed, just in case he needed one.
  • Another particularly intense battle is the match between Aggronaut and Draaainage.
  • The final battle between Admiral Croctopus and Gamma Constrictor, culminating in Croctopus rebuilding the universe through sheer force of will, sacrificing his life in the process.
    Admiral Croctopus: I'M... BUILDING... A... BOAT!

    Zoofights VI 
  • Since nothing's here yet I'd like to nominate Discount Bees' artwork. His portraits of Berlin Walrus and Croaka-Cola are fantastic and I was sad that he didn't/couldn't do one for all the contestants.
  • The end of the battle between the Mangolin' Pangolins and the Hippos with an Eating Disorder. Just when it seems the Pangolins are about to win, an ominous rumbling begins. The missing fourth Hippo smashes through the floor, having grown to gigantic proportions after eating through a meat locker and a World War I museum. It squashes Ballz underfoot and eats Drillz, the leader, leaving only Hammerz to face it alone. Just when it seems Hammerz is doomed, Drillz, now riding a tank, bursts through the hippo's abdomen and saves the day.
  • H.H. Johnson (Blurry Gray Thing)'s observations on Luchadillo (bottom of page).
  • Vylan Antagonist's observations on Gadadhara (down a bit), so good Major Failure counted it despite closing the votes after H.H. Johnson's post. They could also count as a "What Could've Been" for the doomed Reticulated Giraffython and the Russian Rhino Tank. Whatjusthappened's account of Gadadhara on the job (near bottom) is also pretty good and Vylan Antagonist's picture of Gadadhara KO'ing Luchadillo (bottom of page) aint' too bad either.
  • The Fite Yer' Mates Big Bar Brawl on the forum. From the buildup prior to the fight, giving everyone added characterisation and motivations for winning, to the fight itself, written with all the quality and brutality of Major Failure himself, it's clear that jumpropeman may be one of, if not the best writer Zoofights has.
  • The Osmium Chef dies on her own terms, shoving her own whisk-arm into her microwave chest, exploding in a spectacular mass of feathers and electricity, and giving Krilldozer a radioactive migraine as a final Fuck You.
  • The outcome of the seemingly lopsided match of Double Pangolin vs. Black Rabbath: GO HOME, AND BE A FAMILY MAN.
    • This deserves some elaboration. In the previous round Black Rabbath (As Hare Metal) completely obliterated his opponent, Pep-simian, with barely a sweat. The Pangolins by contrast only just scraped through the first round, losing two of their members in the process. Black Rabbath is an unholy engine of Metal death and unfathomable eldritch energies, whereas the Pangolins are armed with a weaponless and stripped down WWI tank, a power drill and an assortment of automatic weaponry. Despite Rabbath and his cult pulling every dirty trick in the book, the Pangolins win the day with teamwork and grit, dismantling Black Rabbath whilst recieving no wounds and the only casualty being the destruction of their tank.
  • Muertodillo versus Horsepower. Midway through the fight is interrupted by a rift in spacetime opening and spitting out Delorelion and Teddy Krueger, (And a cameo by Croctopus!)who continue their previous battle. The fight ends with Delorelion literally punching Teddy Krueger into atoms and Muertodillo hammer throwing Horsepower into the rift.
  • Final Mantisy defends the world from the nightmarish mess that is Mental Ben and Nightmare by magically crushing them in a sphere of water. Keep in mind, up until this point, Mantisy's magic powers were thought to be a mere invention of her game-addled mind.
  • Muhammut Kali absolutely slaughtering his way through the Royal Rumble, racking up an amazing 17 kills.