History Quotes / MoralGuardians

->''"Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised [[TheEvilsOfFreeWill for the good of its victims]] may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty [[PetTheDog may sometimes sleep]], his cupidity may [[VictoryIsBoring at some point be satiated]]; but those who torment us for our own good torment us without end, for they do so with [[KnightTemplar the approval of their own conscience.]]"''

->''Now and then it seems that banning is all they can do. It's all they seem to ''want'' to do. That's the problem with a free nation: you can't make yourself significant by granting freedoms, so you spend your time looking for freedoms to restrict in the name of a greater good, and there's always a greater good... As long as we're worried about sending messages: it sends an excellent message to let kids know that something that might encourage [[Literature/NineteenEightyFour doubleplus Ungoodthink]] can be taken away by the state because you might draw the wrong conclusions.''

->''Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good torment us without end, for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.''
-->-- '''Creator/CSLewis'''

->'''Marge''': A new violent video game has hit the streets! And we need to get rid of it, before it warps any children with its bloops and bleeps!\\
'''Homer''': But that game sounds awesome!\\
'''Marge''': And therefore '''should be destroyed'''!
-->''TheSimpsonsHitAndRun''

->'''Rod Flanders''': Daddy, what are you doing?\\
'''Ned Flanders''': Imploring people I never met to pressure a government with better things to do to punish a man who meant no harm for something nobody even saw. That's what I'm doing!\\
'''Rod Flanders''': (pause) Daddy, [[YouNeedToGetLaid we think you need a new mommy]].
-->-- '''"You Kent Always Say What You Want"''', ''TheSimpsons''

->'''Marge''': Call me a killjoy, but I think that because this is not to my taste, no one else should be able to enjoy it.
-->''TheSimpsons'', "The Great Wife Hope"

->'''Helen Lovejoy''': Won't somebody ''please'' ThinkOfTheChildren?
-->''TheSimpsons'', multiple episodes

->''There are those who so dislike the nude that they find something indecent in the naked truth.''
-->-- '''Francis Herbert Bradley'''

->I am none other than Mr. Kehoe Pinney, President of the Campaign Against Filth and Blasphemy. And we’re going to ban this memory training system of yours in [[OverlyLongGag Swansea, Harrogate, East Devon, Preston, Glasgow, Staines, Yule, Gilford, Bournemouth, Watford, Yeovil, Dudley, Stourbridge, Quinton, Lutton, Weston-Super-Mare, Plymouth, Talke, Paignton, Sidmouth, Eastbourne, Bishop Auckland, Wigan, Jersey, Haverfordwest, the whole of Berkshire, the whole of Cornwall]], and why are we banning it? Because we’re the ones who know what’s disgusting. [[ComplainingAboutShowsYouDontWatch We don’t have to see a pigsty to know it stinks]] ladies and gentlemen. It’s an insult to decent, right thinking people. Not that we’d ever have anything to do with it anyway. And even if we did, it wouldn’t harm us. Never! It would never harm us. Only other people, [[ThinkOfTheChildren who aren’t as mentally stable and mature as we are.]] Thank! You!
-->''Creator/MontyPython'', [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Hastily_Cobbled_Together_for_a_Fast_Buck_Album "Monty Python's Hastily Cobbled Together For A Fast Buck Album"]] in a massive TakeThat to the uproar surrounding ''Film/MontyPythonsLifeOfBrian''.

-> ...You prefer compelling lies about vodka tampons and sex bracelets than factual monotony because you are happier being angry than being right. Moral outrage is useful, even when it's built around imaginary problems because it gives you the context to say, "Wow, I'm a pretty good person in comparison to that."
-->-- {{Cracked}} article ''[[http://www.cracked.com/blog/a-letter-to-parents-about-fake-teen-crazes-news_p2/ A letter to parents about fake teen crazes]]''

->''Wertham wasn’t the only anti-comics hysteric, but he was the first to do a whole book out of the subject, and his testimony formed the bulk of the anti-comics portion of the 1953 juvenile delinquency hearings that ended up crippling the industry. Wertham’s testimony, equal parts irate nonsense and also book tour promotional stop for ''[[UsefulNotes/TheComicsCode Seduction]]'', which had just come out, got half the mothers in the country terrified of just what comic books were doing to their poor, susceptible ''LeaveItToBeaver'' [[TheFifties 1950s]] kids. His testimony contained no scientific data, was based on no credible research, and willfully misrepresented the content of the comics he was using as examples, but he brought with him [[KnowNothingKnowItAll the veneer of a very respectable doctor]] fighting the good fight for the kids.''
-->-- '''[[http://www.rickworley.com/2012/06/22/fredric-wertham-douchebags-of-comics/ Rick Worley]]'''

-''>We're the morality Squad\\

->If any form of pleasure is exhibited,\\

This is the land of the free!

->We're the morality Squad\\

Unless I think you're wrong!

->''It is, above all else, a profoundly stupid way to go down. Philip Hinchcliffe, after three years of making an enormously compelling case for why he is the best producer of ''{{Doctor Who}}'' since Verity Lambert, is given the sack in order to appease Mary Whitehouse. Three years of dark fairytale postmodernism with a flare for the cynically epic come to a close because of the incessant complaints of a crazy woman.''
-->-- '''[[http://www.philipsandifer.com/2011/11/pop-between-realities-home-in-time-for_23.html Phil Sandifer]]'''

->''Every week, each television network would secretly produce a list of names of actors, writers, and directors who could not be hired. The list was arbitrary, to say the last. There was, however, a means of expiation for those excluded. A grocery-store owner in Schenectady had made himself [[AuthorityInNameOnly the acknowledged authority on Communism]] by refusing to sell anything advertised on those programs that hired Communists. Simply, a threat from him could deprive you of work; however, if the proscribed actors or writer proved to be genuinely repentant, he could go to Schenectady, much as a sick Catholic might go to Lourdes, and there {{the Butcher}}, as we called him, would absolve him if he sword to sin no more.''

-->-- '''C.S. Lewis'''

->"Mary Whitehouse has taken Umbrage, no surprise there."

''Rod Flanders''': (pause) Daddy, [[YouNeedToGetLaid we think you need a new mommy]].

->'''Helen Lovejoy''': Won't somebody ''please'' think of the children?

->"Boy, am I glad thy cut that last shot out of the theatrical version. I hate it when my slasher movies [[ShapedLikeItself contain slashings in them]]. Just as I hate comedies that don't cut out the funny parts."

->''Now and then it seems that banning is all they can do. It's all they seem to ''want'' to do. That's the problem with a free nation: you can't make yourself significant by granting freedoms, so you spend your time looking for freedoms to restrict in the name of a greater good, and there's always a greater good. ...''

->''As long as we're worried about sending messages: it sends an excellent message to let kids know that something that might encourage [[Literature/NineteenEightyFour doubleplus Ungoodthink]] can be taken away by the state because you might draw the wrong conclusions.''

->''"Mary Whitehouse has taken Umbrage, no surprise there."''

->'''Marge''': A new violent video game has hit the streets! And we need to get rid of it, before it warps any children with its bloops and bleeps!
->'''Homer''': But that game sounds awesome!
->'''Marge''': And therefore should be destroyed!

->'''Rod Flanders''': Daddy, what are you doing?
->'''Ned Flanders''': [[LampshadeHanging Imploring people I never met to pressure a government with better things to do]] [[BrutalHonesty to punish a man who meant no harm for something nobody even saw. That's what I'm doing!]]
->'''Rod Flanders''': (pause) Daddy, [[YouNeedToGetLaid we think you need a new mommy]].

->''Most American parents are fools that don't watch their foolish children close enough so they give them foolishly a game like Pokemon and months later they foolishly realize that one foolish part of the game is not part of their foolish vision to their foolish child's foolish bright future. So they foolishly start foolish protest groups to foolishly annoy those who are foolishly older that foolishly enjoy the foolish censored foolish aspect of the game's foolishly protesters foolishly protest about.''
-->--'''[[http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/genmessage.php?board=960099&topic=53386741 RatedRKO7]]'''


-> There are those who so dislike the nude that they find something indecent in the naked truth.

-> If any form of pleasure is exhibited,
-> Report to me and it shall be prohibited!
-> I'll put my foot down; so shall it be!
-> This is the land of the free!
--> --Groucho Marx, ''DuckSoup''

->We're the morality Squad\\
Armed with the wrath of God!\\
My name is Granbo\\
And here's my holy hot-rod!\\
Freedom for all the people\\
Brave, true and strong\\
Freedom for all the people\\
Unless I think you're wrong!
-->-- '''{{GWAR}}''', ''"The Morality Squad"''

->Ask yourselves if this is the kind of book you would wish your wife or servants to read
-->-- From the court hearing against LadyChatterleysLover
----

->''Mary Whitehouse has taken Umbrage, no surprise there.''
-->-- '''MontyPythonsFlyingCircus''', "Election Night Special"

->''As long as we're worried about sending messages: it sends an excellent message to let kids know that something that might encourage [[NineteenEightyFour doubleplus Ungoodthink]] can be taken away by the state because you might draw the wrong conclusions.''

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-->''MontyPython'', [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Hastily_Cobbled_Together_for_a_Fast_Buck_Album "Monty Python's Hastily Cobbled Together For A Fast Buck Album"]] in a massive TakeThat to the uproar surrounding ''MontyPythonsLifeOfBrian''.

-> It was a shocking thing to say and I knew it was a shocking thing to say. But no one has the right to live without being shocked. No one has the right to spend their life without being offended. Nobody has to read this book. Nobody has to pick it up. Nobody has to open it. And if you open it and read it, you don't have to like it. And if you read it and you dislike it, you don't have to remain silent about it. You can write to me, you can complain about it, you can write to the publisher, you can write to the papers, you can write your own book. You can do all those things, but there your rights stop. No one has the right to stop me writing this book. No one has the right to stop it being published, or bought, or sold or read. That's all I have to say on that subject.
-->-- '''Philip Pullman''', answering a question whether his latest book ''The Good Man Jesus and the Scoundrel Christ'' was "offensive".

->'''Rod''': Daddy, what are you doing?
->'''Ned Flanders''': Imploring people I never met to pressure a government with better things to do to punish a man who meant no harm for something nobody even saw. That's what I'm doing!
-->''TheSimpsons'', "You Kent Always Say What You Want"

->'''Rod Flanders''': Daddy, what are you doing?
->'''Ned Flanders''': [[LampshadeHanging Imploring people I never met to pressure a government with better things to do]] [[BrutalHonesty to punish a man who meant no harm for something nobody even saw. That's what I'm doing!]]
->'''Rod Flanders''': (pause) Daddy, [[YouNeedToGetLaid we think you need a new mommy]].
-->-- '''"You Kent Always Say What You Want"''', ''TheSimpsons''

-->''TheSimpsons: Hit and Run''

->'''Maude''': Won't somebody ''please'' think of the children?