History Funny / ThisBites

'''[[EnragedByIdiocy Chopper:]]''' ''( [[SlasherSmile giving off a "pleasant" smile]] that makes everyone take two steps away from him.)'' Nooo, it's perfectly fine! You see, I'm wrapping up my research on the transmogrative properties of Zoan-flesh, and I found a new project to start on once I'm done! ''(transforms into Human Point)'' '''''[[SuddenlyShouting HOW SWORDS APPARENTLY CUT TWENTY POINTS CLEAN OFF THE TOP OF A PERSON'S I.Q. AND]]''''' '''[[SuddenlyShouting SLAUGHTER]]''' '''''[[SuddenlyShouting SAID PERSON'S SENSE OF SELF-PRESERVATION!]]''''' ''(smiles at Zoro)'' '''''oh, but don't worry, I won't research''''' '''you''' '''''or anything! After all, I can't rightly use''''' '''you''' '''''as a constant, seeing as I expect this penalty is accrued for''''' '''each''' '''''sword a person wields, [[SuddenlyShouting THEREBY MAKING YOU AN EXTREME OUTLIER!]]'''''\\

* Sengoku tells Garp about the deciding factor to make Perona the new Warlord: Gender equality.

** A drunken Vivi soars past on a throne made of hands with a whirlwind of confetti surrounding her, declaring herself queen of the skies.

* Everything about the SBS's new visual component, and the most popular show being [[MrFanservice Zoro's]] [[EatingTheEyeCandy workout routine]] - which Cross is equating to softcore porn much to his chagrin. A good chunk of his female viewership is now blacklisted as a result. To whit:

** And Tashigi matching the workout on her own Marine ship - including being sans clothing on her upper torso (though still wearing a bra), with Smoker having to chase off all the other oglers. Although he himself does a DoubleTake when he notices that she is using his jutte as an exercise bar.

* And where is Raphey? Cooling her heels on the Sunny, knowing she can't leave as a ship guard, stuck with doodling on Perona's body and getting bored right out of her shell.

* Tsuru calls the SBS to warn the Straw Hats and the world about Shiki's return and threat, [[RightBehindMe only to realize that he is already aboard the Sunny and is listening to the call.]]

* Robin's justification for why Nami ultimately has to befriend Perona over the other female Straw Hats. Namely, Vivi dislikes Perona [[InsistentTerminology referring to herself as a princess]] (Vivi being an actual princess), Conis finds Perona too creepy, [[TheLadette Raphey]] doesn't care for anyone who can't throw a punch, Merry's opinion of cuteness is the exact opposite of Perona. And why does she not consider herself as a possibility?

** Said group includes Sanji, who is shouting for his lovelies; Conis, who is shouting for her friends; Mikey, who is shouting for a good fight; and [[OnlySaneMan Usopp]], [[TheLastOfTheseIsNotLikeTheOthers who is crying that the noise is attracting so much danger]].

** Her constant reminders to herself that she is, in fact, supposed to be the good guy here when she does things like monologue and break into {{Evil Laughter}}.

** Cross neatly puncturing all of Yoko's arguments that his crew are here to pillage the town, although he is at a loss for Franky rebuilding Luigia's house.

* The situation that gives Nami the opportunity to help Perona: with her Bearsy somehow tangled up in Sunny's rigging, Perona goes up to get him, only to get tangled up herself.

** And when Donny asks why he is helping instead of someone stronger or with more Devil Fruit knowledge, Chopper bluntly tells him that [[GotVolunteered he's now his assistant]] as he's been getting swamped with work lately, and he does not want to resort to overusing his stim pack if he can help it.

* When Cross sees Judge Baskerville, he simply cannot resist making an in-joke

--> '''Cross:''' Male Coward— Female Beauty— Female Brainiac— Male Leader… and a talking dog. Sonnuva bitch we're freaking [[Franchise/ScoobyDoo Mystery Incorporated]], One Piece Edition.

** Conis is initially perfectly polite until Merry says that the dead don't walk the earth on the Blue Seas. Conis promptly joins the above two in catatonia.

** Why is Leo so happy that Brook is joining? With another swordsman, he is now no longer Zoro's sole training whetstone.

* Brook playing [[WeNeedADistraction bait]] for Perona: first she scares him off by him being scared of ghosts, then while she is berating the zombies for being intimidated, he comes back, [[MoodWhiplash compliments her]], then asks if he can see her panties. Cue manic chase.

--> '''Cross:''' Male Coward— Female Beauty— Female Brainiac— Male leader… and a talking dog. Sonnuva bitch we're freaking [[Franchise/ScoobyDoo Mystery Incorporated]], One Piece Edition.

** Dragon states that once one has experienced the four Blue Seas, the Grand Line and the New World, [[SeenItAll nothing fazes him anymore]]... except maybe Garp's stupidity.

** And when they finally catch him, they are suddenly interrupted by a yeti (Chopper) who is incensed that they're straining their injuries (and making him do the same).

** And when Zoro takes him out, he laments that he cut something he didn't mean to cut (''the sea and sky!''), and that means he still has a long way to go. Mihawk is in agreement, but Usopp is not:

** Upon first seeing their captain, Nami is surprisingly calm about it, saying that she is now numb to it all. Unfortunately, thanks to the Dugongs, that doesn't last long.

* Cross and Soundbite {{Troll}}ing the Marines who are trying to intercept him going into the palace by pretending they are ventriloquists entertaining Princess Vivi.

* Before the Groggy Ring match even starts, [[RefugeInAudacity the Groggy Monsters are suddenly beaten to a pulp under a cloud of thick pink fog, while the Straw Hats' team is still standing stoically and left completely untouched]] (albeit [[BloodSplatteredWarrior covered in blood]]). And despite Foxy spluttering imprecations, against Vivi's logical arguments, [[NotCheatingUnlessYouGetCaught there is nothing he can say to prove that the Straw Hats were responsible]].
** While Nami is whistling innocently in front of everyone.
** And Vivi is right; Nami isn't responsible for the pink fog. That would be Chopper, [[FunnyBackgroundEvent who is hiding behind one of the tents trying to stabilize his reagents before they cause more unwanted fog]]. When he can't, Carue is forced to swallow the compound before it grows out of hand... [[FireBreathingDiner much to his pain]].

** When Cross mentions that they will need to leave some of the gold pillar behind, Nami reacts [[NeckLift by grabbing him by the neck in a vice-like grip and hoisting him into the air]] with a demonic look on her face, with [[{{Troll}} Soundbite]] throwing in some OminousLatinChanting.

** Nami is so euphoric that [[OOCIsSeriousBusiness she is fully willing to give as much spare gold to the crew as they can ask for... except for Zoro.]]

* When Cross, Soundbite and Vivi come across the decimated mob of bounty hunters that had tried to attack the Merry, they all think they are hallucinating. Usopp, one of said decimators, [[DudeWheresMyRespect is not pleased]].

** And when Cross comments that the Mr. 1 pair and Mr. 2 will not have to do as much work to damage Nanohana, we get the first instance of Vivi only being a TechnicalPacifist when it comes to him.

** And when everyone predictably objects to slathering themselves in liquid stench, [[ToThePain Cross goes into a long, detailed and bloody description of what could happen if they are infected by a prehistoric disease]].

* During Cross's interrogation of Miss Wednesday (a.k.a. Vivi), after his [[SherlockScan cold-reading about the way she holds herself]] tells him that she is rich, he wonders why she joined a bounty hunting organization in the first place, which leads to him entertaining the idea that she did it for romance.

** Then, when Cross is caught in the bathroom by someone while he is clearly ''not'' drunk or drugged, this is the NonSequitur Cross uses to get him to drop his guard.

* When the crew first enters Laboon without Luffy, Cross bets 10 Berries that he is making his way through the blowhole and will catch up to them inside. Nami takes the bet, and when Luffy does show up from exactly that place, Cross laments that he didn't bet 1000 Berries instead. Nami reluctantly pays up.

* Cross is preparing to ask Luffy if he can join his crew, but Luffy makes the offer first. This is so unexpected that Cross and the rest of Luffy's crew who had just caught up all ask if he is serious.

* TwoWords: [[EverythingsBetterWithDinosaurs T-Rex Rodeo.]]

** While it is never majorly explained how Sanji was able to defeat the Supernovas, X Drake, however, apparently was fed a rare-cooked steak that somehow caused him food poisoning and [[NotSoStoic was into full]] LargeHam[[NotSoStoic -mode about it]]. The rest of the bed-ridden Supernovas could not reply to that.

* The reunion between the ex-Baroque Works agents in Merveille. To put in context, 5 and Valentine attempted to assert their seniority in Baroque Works in front of Vivi (who stills holds a grudge), only for the Alabastan to ''reassert'' her royal authority and Robin playing along saying she is [[AlwaysABiggerFish their superior]] by lightly choking them. Valentine tries to ask Bartolomeo for help, only for the Supernova to brush her off saying they brought it on themselves.
* Brook asks the waitress Ever to see her panties and she responds by kicking his head, as canon in the movie. Only this time, it removed the basket he was currently wearing and revealed to everyone he is [[DemBones a living skeleton]]. The sight was enough [[NotSoStoic to make Miss Goldenweek completely lose her usual cool.]]

* Nami, Billy, Conis and Su run into Urouge, who is trying to follow the Straw Hats' example and find an AnimalCompanion, but isn't having any luck so far with finding a beast that is able to keep up with him. Now, remember that the NoodleIncident on Kyuka Island involving him was ''{{Nosebleed}}-inducing''.

** Cross finds one instance of failure in the blackbook... and it is downright ''pathetic'': [[Theatre/RomeoAndJuliet an alliance was required between two important families (Montfield and Capoy) for political and financial reasons, CP9 manipulated the two heirs to fall in love, it all worked out, they legitimately got hitched, both families made it to the wedding]]... and then the best man ''[[GossipyHens Fukuro]]'' spilled the beans to both families and turned the whole thing into a bloodbath.

* It turns out that Soundbite didn't know that one only needs to eat a single bit of a Devil Fruit to become a user, leading to this gem:

** The Ex-Baroque Works agents alongside Vivi are having a tea party using the Two Witches' potions as beverages, [[ForcedTransformation causing the formers to turn into a variety of animals]], while the latter remains furious, not due to the potions but because she wanted to dress up as one of [[Myth/EgyptianMythology the Alabastan pantheon deities]] and Cross chose ''[[NeverSmileAtACrocodile Sobek]]'', making her into a literal Crocodile, bringing bad memories of the ex-Warlord and traitor. The witches propose giving her potions to change her appearance and Vivi gets turned into all kinds of reptiles (which she doesn't want), ending up as a NotZilla for her troubles.