History Funny / SamAndMickey

* He repeatedly calling Yasmin "Yamsen".

[[AC:Training Tips with Tommy]]

[[AC:The first HalloweenEpisode]]

[[AC:The Barbie Cooking Show: Episode 1]]

[[AC:The Barbie Cooking Show: Episode 2]]

[[AC:Barbie's Book Club: Part 4]]

-->'''Ken:''' Deborah!
-->'''Barbie:''' ''Deborah!''
-->'''Ken:''' De-''boo''-rah!
-->'''Barbie:''' De-boo-''rah!''
-->'''[[SurroundedByIdiots Deborah]]:''' How many cooking shows do we have to cancel because you keep getting drunk and making fools of yourselves on air?

[[AC:Dreamhouse Dinners]]

* At one point, he brags about not being a Dad after making a "Dad joke", only for Chelsea to wander onto the set:
-->'''Chelsea:''' I knew it!\\
'''Ken:''' [[OhCrap Oh, no!]] ''*yelling to someone off-camera*'' I told you, I needed a ''closed'' set!\\
'''Chelsea:''' ''*tearfully*'' I knew it! Who is it then? [[WhosYourDaddy Is it the]] [[Franchise/PowerRangers Red Power Ranger?!]] He's got anger issues like me! ''*runs away crying*''\\
'''Ken:''' Daddy's kidding, my little gumdrop! Go line up your teddies! We're gonna have a tea party later, okay? You wanna do my hair?! Are we still filming right now?!

-->'''Barbie:''' I gave you the best 50 years of my life, Ken! And for what?! I gave you four daughter--[[VerbalBackspace uh, no. I meant,]] [[BlatantLies four little sisters]]--crap.

'''Ken:''' [[YourMom Your mom]]'s a unit of measure.\\

'''Ken:''' Your mom's a unit of measure.\\

'''Ken:''' Your mom doesn't even make sense!

[[AC:Call Me... Maybe?"]]

[[AC:The Barbie Cooking Show" Episode 1]]

[[AC:The Barbie Cooking Show" Episode 2]]

[[AC:Barbie's Book Club" Part 4]]

* "60":

** Skipper recording the whole ordeal. Ever after Barbie tells her to stop.
** Barbie threatening Skipper.

** Barbie singing new takes on songs from pretty much every Franchise/DisneyAnimatedCanon musical with a royal female lead. (Ironically, ''Beauty and the Beast'' provides one of the few exceptions.)

** Barbie imitating the ''Bond'' theme song with a real gun. Said gun turns out to be loaded. And Barbie ends up [[IJustShotMarvinInTheFace accidentally shooting]] [[CameraAbuse the camera]].

[[AC:The Ken Cooking Show", from start to finish]]
** Ken ''bombarding'' the audience with his theme song:

--->I DON'T BAKE CAKE!\\

* "Career Girl":
** Ken using a LoopholeAbuse regarding how many feet he should stay away from Barbie in her restraining order, which leads to a YourMom exchange.
--->'''Barbie:''' You know you’re not allowed within a hundred feet of me.\\

* The first HalloweenEpisode:
** Barbie engages in a long list of possible characters that Yasmin is dressed as, which includes a [[Franchise/MyLittlePony my little pony]], a [[Franchise/CareBears Sleeps-Around-Alot Care Bear]], Brooke from ''Series/TheBoldAndTheBeautiful'' and [[Series/TheBradyBunch Marcia Brady]] after getting hit in the nose with a football. She also suggests a Real Housewife of Toys-R-Us, which eventually became [[HilariousInHindsight real thing within the series.]]
** In the background at one point, the Sam and Mickey dolls get engaged in a catfight. At another point, Mickey falls of a piano while drunk, and is then seen sporting a bandage on her head.
** Barbie doing a HeadDesk ''on the piano keys'' during TheStinger.
* "Call Me... Maybe?":
** "I hope you have fun with your [[Franchise/DisneyPrincess Disney whores]], you son-of-a-[[CurseCutShort bit--"]]
** She screams at him while pounding on the piano keys:

** Barbie, crying and on the toilet, singing [[Music/WhitneyHouston "I Will Always Love You"]] quite poorly.
** The ending that shows that Ken didn't receive any of her messages, as he doesn't have a phone, but ''Mr. Potato Head'' did instead.
* "Baby Shower":
** The montage of events when Barbie was pregnant with Krissy, which includes her singing [[Music/BetteMidler "Wind Beneath My Wings"]] to a bottle of ''beer'', complaining how fat she is, eating for two, crying over ''Film/{{Titanic|1997}}'', and kicking Ken off of their single bed and even blaming the pregnancy on the bed itself and donning [[PaperThinDisguise a disguise]] while at the supermarket while she and Ken buy some [[PottyFailure incontinence pads.]] Even better, the pads are a Barbie brand and the box reads [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial "I'm Not Pregnant]], [[NoYou But You Might Be!"]]
** TheReveal that Yasmin was never pregnant and [[GassyScare just had a bad case of gas the whole time!]]

* "The Meltdown":
** The entirety of Barbie's, well, meltdown.
** In TheStinger, Skipper finally gets to say "Dijon Mustard" out loud in Barbie's presence. Cue Skipper laughing and clapping along to Barbie firing her handgun.
* "Pineapple Store"
** The signs behind Anslem demonstrate some sass, such as the one asking, "If you bought a Pineapple [=uPad=], why did you do that?", or the one demanding shoppers with no money to leave.
** This:
-->'''Skipper:''' Everyone likes boobs, Barbie! It doesn't make you a lesbian!
* Sam & Mickey's Advent Calendar:
** When Ken delivers the Christmas tree, he claims wolves attacked him on the lips, so Barbie gives him a get-well kiss. Skipper then debunks Ken's story by pointing out the tree has a price tag from Wal-Mart.
** Stacie tries to give precise instructions on how to trim the tree, but Barbie just hastily adds garland, one bauble, and a bottle to top it all off. The next day, Stacie trims the tree to her own liking, but she and Barbie fight over who should put the star on the top. They end up breaking the star, so Barbie carries out a "backup plan": dress Krissy as an angel, and place her on the top of the tree.
** Barbie giving Yasmin a ''TimeBomb'' disguised as an early Christmas gift on December 16. The very next episode reveals that Yasmin had [[NonFatalExplosion somehow survived the explosion.]]
** Barbie giving Yasmin a {{Yellow Snow}}cone on December 17, much to Stacie's disgust.
** Barbie shoos away some carolers by pretending to mistake them for trick-or-treaters.
** Barbie mistaking Santa Claus to be a burglar, and ''attacking'' him.
* "Krissy's Christening":
** Ken prepares the christening so efficiently and thoroughly, that Barbie awards him, "10 dad points". Ken cheers that he only needs 60 more for... a sticker.
** When Barbie asks who would like to become Krissy's godparent, no one raises their hand, except for Yasmin. While she loudly begs Barbie to pick her, Barbie calls everyone else out on not volunteering, then arbitrarily picks Mrs. Potato Head instead.
--->'''Barbie:''' You're the Godmother. Congratulations.\\

** Barbie's hallucinations of a possessed Krissy could humor viewers who recognise them as such. When the other "little sisters" hear about them, they recall some other nonsense Barbie worried about while drunk, such as the toaster spreading rumors about her.
* "Road Rage":
** Barbie making Skipper get them ice cream.
** Barbie getting into a physical fight with an adjacent driver after a YourMom exchange. Cue the black eye.
--->'''Barbie:''' Your mother must've been a whore because you drive like an ''asshole''!\\

** The cause of the traffic jam? Barbie's stretched limousine, parked upside-down across six lanes, which couldn't be towed away because it was filled with hundred of liquor bottles.
--->'''Barbie:''' [[OhCrap Sh-*bleep*]] Skipper, drive!
--->'''Skipper:''' I can't!
--->'''Barbie:''' Put your foot on the gas, Skipper!
--->'''Skipper:''' I can't, Barbie, there's a car in front of u-''(vroom-SMASH!!)''
* "The Barbie Cooking Show" Episode 1:
** Barbie being stopped from even trying to practice her knife juggling.
** Barbie crying over the "On Top of Spaghetti" song.
** Barbie impatiently screaming at the oven: "COOK! Why'd it take so long it's not even done just COOK! ''COOK!!''"
** Barbie asking a crew member if he would like to have sex with her.
--->'''Guy:''' No.
--->'''Barbie:''' Real quick.
--->'''Guy:''' No.
--->'''Barbie:''' ''REAL QUICK!''
** Barbie doing a "turkey dance".
** Skipper being called in to deal with her "big sister".
** Barbie demonstrates why she can't drink cooking sherry, which Ken says makes her hallucinate.
--->'''Barbie:''' But I can't go, because the lipstick truck hasn't arrived, and I've got a date with a blue dinosaur!...Why is the room filled with ants?!
** As it turns out, this is not the first time that Barbie put baby Krissy in the oven.
** Barbie and Ken having sex ''on-air''.
* "The Return":

--->'''Barbie:''' So help me Skipper. I will friend you on Facebook!
--->'''Skipper:''' Oh please no.
--->'''Barbie:''' And then, on your birthday, I'll post a baby picture of you on your timeline.
--->'''Skipper:''' Oh God, please no!
--->'''Barbie:''' And I'll write a huge paragraph about how much you mean to me, and how fast you've grown, and the promising young woman you've turned into!
--->'''Skipper:''' Oh please Barbie, AnythingButThat
--->'''Barbie:''' ''Talk!''
* "Home Alone":
** Barbie's various {{Failure Montage}}s of putting up the tree, making cookies and egg nog and trying to invite various people over to hang out with or having a sexual tryst. The latter instance happens after she gets out of the bath, and yes she ''is'' naked during the montage, albeit with a large "Censored" bar over her body.
** Barbie's "gift" is a clever one: she does a surprise makeover of Skipper's room into an overkill of pink decor, rainbows and [[FauxHorrific worst of all,]] pictures of herself. The ending says it all:
--->'''Skipper:''' ''(offscreen in her room) Barbie, what did you do to my room?!''\\

** Upon going to meet up with the family in the cabin, it appears that the moment will end on a happy note, but it gets subverted:
--->'''Barbie:''' Also, pass me the baby. Not because I missed her, but I like the smell of babies.\\

* "The Barbie Cooking Show" Episode 2:
** Chelsea having to be hauled off to the ICU thanks to her PlotAllergy to almond powder. Bonus BlackComedy points for Barbie [[CassandraTruth thinking that Chelsea is just faking it]].
** Krissy falling off the kitchen counter and crashing onto the floor. ''Twice.''
--->'''Barbie:''' ''(the first time)'' Honestly, who didn't see that coming?!\\

** Katniss and Bella Swan adding squirrel meat and human blood, respectively, to the cake mixture. Barbie is [[NauseaFuel understandably grossed out.]]
--->'''Barbie:''' Why don’t I know any ''normal'' people?!
** Barbie doesn't even give Yasmin a ''chance'' to be her co-host.
--->'''Yasmin:''' Ello!
--->'''Barbie:''' No!
** Barbie and Ken having sex on-air ''again'', despite Deborah's warnings.
** Barbie, by herself, declaring that she won't touch ''any'' of the wine bottles. Cue GilliganCut.
* "Flying High":
** The RunningGag of Barbie and her story being interrupted by her prisonmates, causing Barbie to get increasingly impatient as time goes on.
** Barbie pretty much defying ''every single rule'' that her family told her to follow.
** This:

* "The Attic":
** During TheStinger:

* "Barbie's Book Club" Part 4:

* "The Babysitters":
** This:
--->'''Stacie:''' ''(on the phone)'' Oh thank Christ! Barbie, please tell me you’re coming home now!
--->'''Barbie:''' ''(on the phone)'' What? No, we’re still on our way to the goddamn hospital! Traffic is horrific ‘cause some idiot crashed a Twinkies truck on the highway, and people are abandoning their cars to fill their purses with loot! Ken, put your seatbelt back on and sit down! You do not need to engage, you need a blood transfusion! *bleep*, I hate my life! Anyway, is everything okay there-Ken, I am not *bleep*ing kidding, I will leave you on the road and turn back home so help me! I gotta go, talk soon. PUT YOUR SEATBELT ON!! ''(hangs up)''
--->'''Stacie:''' Barbie! Barbie!! ''Son of a Hufflepuff!''
** Margaret bottle-feeding baby Krissy ''gin'' in an attempt to soothe the latter's teething gums.
** Margaret's reaction to Mexican food.
* "Furniture Shopping":
** Ken does ''[[GoMadFromTheRevelation not]]'' handle TheReveal that Yasmin is actually only 16 years old well ''[[HeroicBSOD at all]]''.
** A man mistaking a display toilet for a real one, much to Barbie's and Yasmin's disgust.
* "Blizzard":
** Barbie tried peeing on the snowed-in wheels, but she ran out of pee, so she tries to down a huge slurpee.
** This:

* "Awards Show":
** Barbie hijacks the InMemoriam reel to share a song that she wishes the DAG nominated for Best Song: "Touch My Boat", from the ''WesternAnimation/FindingNemo''-themed porno ''Grinding Nemo'', which translates several of the Pixar movie's most famous quotes into innuendo and pick-ups.
* "Barbie's Failed Screen Tests":

--->'''Director:''' [[GetOut Please leave right now.]]
* "The Ken Cooking Show", from start to finish:

** Ken going off on a tangent about garnishes.
** Ken being unable to bring himself to slaughter a live pig.
** Ken's MinorInjuryOverreaction to getting hot oil splashed onto his chest.
** Ken accidentally cutting his hand with a sword that he used to chop vegetables.
--->'''Ken:''' AAH! I'M HURT! I'M HURT AGAIN OH GOD THERE'S SO MUCH BLOOD! ''(ScreamsLikeALittleGirl)'' HOW DID YOU KNOW I CAN'T HANDLE LARGE KNIVES I MEAN I GUESS IT'S A LITTLE OBVIOUS SINCE I CAN'T HANDLE LARGE SPOONS EITHER!! UGHHHHH, THERE'S SO MUCH BLOOD!!
** The return of [[OnlySaneMan Deborah]] after Ken and Barbie drink:
--->'''Ken:''' Deborah!
--->'''Barbie:''' ''Deborah!''
--->'''Ken:''' De-''boo''-rah!
--->'''Barbie:''' De-boo-''rah!''
--->'''[[SurroundedByIdiots Deborah]]:''' How many cooking shows do we have to cancel because you keep getting drunk and making fools of yourselves on air?
** At one point, he brags about not being a Dad after making a "Dad joke", only for Chelsea to wander onto the set:
--->'''Chelsea:''' I knew it!\\

* "Dreamhouse Dinners":
** Barbie spends episode #3 trying to repeat an incident in which Krissy attempted to say, "duck", but accidentally dropped an F-bomb instead. When Krissy says different words, Barbie becomes so frustrated, she substitutes "duck" for F-bombs. Only after Barbie leaves, does Krissy close out the video with a (bleeped-out) PrecisionFStrike.
* "Tommy":
** Ken's follow-up to Barbie's explanation to the "little sisters" for hating Tommy:

** Tommy's crying/complaining about his life problems, including his belief that his girlfriend, Paprika, broke up with him [[TooMuchInformation because his penis is too big]] and how he was disqualified from a competition due to his urine testing positive for horse tranquilizers[[note]]Which were later revealed to be sold to his by his neighbor Aristotle Johnson[[/note]] and how he believes that [[TheScapegoat it was the Russians that tampered with it instead.]]
** He repeatedly calling Yasmin "Yamsen".
** This exchange when Barbie is trying to force Tommy and Yasmin together:

** Barbie ''literally'' [[BreakingTheFourthWall breaks the fourth wall]]!
%%* The entirety of "The Toast".
* "16 and Pregnant":
** At the gender reveal party for Yasmin's and Tommy's baby, Barbie gives out penis-shaped lollipops and vagina-like cupcakes, much to Yasmin's disgust. Tommy makes things worse by getting a lollipop and a cupcake, then suggestively sticking one into the other.
* "Return To Horseback Mountain":
** With Ken apparently unable to deliver BadBadActing, Barbie instead trades lines with him for one scene, complete with her calling him, "Barbie," and him calling her, "Ken." Lisa Felicia decides to keep this take in the final film, confusing the duo until they figure out Mattel's FailureGambit.
* "Delivery":
** Barbie and the nurse, Sinead (the same one from "Surgery") torture Yasmin with singing songs from the former's "Push Playlist", including [[Music/SaltNPepa "Push It"]], [[Music/LadyGaga "Born This Way"]] and [[Music/JustinBieber "Baby"]]. ''Then'' the rest of the family join in with singing the latter.
** Tommy's ridiculous beliefs that pulling a hamstring and being kicked in the crotch are more painful than giving birth.
** Barbie then singing [[WesternAnimation/TheLionKing1994 "Circle of Life"]] while Yasmin is giving birth.
* "Quarantine":
** Barbie torments a socially-distant Yasmin by pretending to beg for a hug, until Yasmin cries that she can't come in.
** The RunningGag of Barbie showing up in a Winnie the Pooh outfit that consists of a bear head, red half-shirt and no pants. They even blur out her bottom half everytime!
* "Mugshot": The montages of Barbie's crime sprees.

** Margaret's [[IAteWhat reaction]] to Mexican food.

'''Ken:''' Daddy's kidding, my little gumdrop! Line up your teddies: we'll have a tea party after this, okay? You wanna do my hair?! Are we still filming right now?!

'''Moment Subpages are Administrivia/SpoilersOff. Administrivia/YouHaveBeenWarned.'''
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-->'''Stacie:''' Barbie! Barbie!! ''Son of a Hufflepuff!''