History Creator / DaveBarry

** He attempts to summarize his wife’s high school history textbook as follows: “History: 5,000,000,000 BC — 1962: After the Earth cooled, it formed an extremely Fertile Crescent containing primitive people such as the Hittites, who believed in just the stupidest things you ever heard of. Then came Greece and Rome, followed by Asia. All of this came to a halt following the Middle Ages which were caused by the Jutes…”

''There's been owls pukin' in my bed.''

* GagWords: Usually a new one in every column. [[labelnote:Such as]] brassiere brassiere brassiere[[/labelnote]]

* ScrewPolitenessImASenior: Barry would like to attack people with his cane, thank you very much.

-->''I was staying at a luxury Hyatt hotel. There was a little plastic sign in the bathroom that said: "Our towels are 100 percent cotton. Should you wish to purchase a set, they are available in the gift store. Should you prefer the set in your bathroom, a $75 charge will automatically be added to your bill." This was Hyatt's polite way of saying, "If you steal our towels, we'll charge you 75 bucks." So I stole the sign. Really. I kept it in my guest bathroom for a couple of years, to amuse guests.''

* TwoWayTapping: "Crack U.S. counterintelligence agents in Moscow begin to suspect that the U.S. Embassy in Moscow, constructed by Soviet labor, might be bugged when one of them sneezes in the ambassador's office and six chairs say "Gesundheit" ".

* FilkSong: Wrote one of these with several verses about [[MultilevelMarketingScheme Tupperware]], and even performed it with a band in front of a group of Tupperware salespeople.

* ArsonMurderAndJaywalking: A recurring trope. He once described 1963 and 1968 as "A Long String of Bummers," starting with [[UsefulNotes/JohnFKennedy Kennedy's assassination]], followed by the election of goofy-looking UsefulNotes/LyndonJohnson, the UsefulNotes/VietnamWar and its associated controversies, more assassinations and riots, and ''Series/GilligansIsland'' being cancelled.

** "I am not making this up". Sometimes he is, sometimes he isn't.

* BreadEggsMilkSquick: The headline for one of his columns was ''Coffee? Tea? Weasel Spit?''. There's also the column about Kopi Luwak, a type of coffee that [[NauseaFuel is made from coffee beans that have been pooped out by a civet]].

He's also one of the few people to get a sitcom based on himself, called ''Dave's World''. It aired from 1993 to 1997 on CBS, with Barry portrayed by Creator/HarryAnderson.

* {{Mondegreen}}:[[invoked]] He devoted an entire chapter to this in ''Dave Barry's Book of Bad Songs,'' commenting that his bad song voting produced many votes for "Ain't No Woman Like the One-Eyed Gott." The chapter began with his misinterpretation of the Beach Boys' song "Help Me Rhonda."

* AttackOfThePoliticalAd: ''Dave Barry Hits Below the Beltway'' has an entire chapter parodying campaign ads in which two candidates for Congress run ads against each other using the same TV announcer and the same [[PhotoOpWithTheDog dog]] and illustrated with [[WorstNewsJudgmentEver "actual newspaper headlines"]] and grainy black-and-white photos of the opponent embracing [[StarWars Darth Vader]] and UsefulNotes/AdolfHitler and [[KickTheDog abusing animals]]. The ads are so successful in scaring people away from voting for each other that, come election day, voter turnout is zero.

** In the article where his son gets hit by a car while out biking (his son was okay), he ends the article apologizing for how serious this turned out, and that it was supposed to be a funny story about the hospital visit. He then mentions that his son wants him to remind his readers that wearing a safety helmet while bicycling is important.

** His articles written on 9/11 were very poignant, talking about the tragedy and the heroism on display in a very un-joking manner. In response to this, several people mailed Barry saying they appreciated his tone and outlook and hoped he would write about more serious topics more often. Barry responded that, on the contrary, he hopes that he doesn't have to, since he only writes that way when something terrible has happened.

* WaitingSkeleton: Dave Barry [[http://www.miamiherald.com/living/liv-columns-blogs/dave-barry/article1937626.html once riffed]] that Customer Service must be filled with corpses since nobody's ever been able to get through to a live person. Therefore the obvious solution is to transfer the guys over from Telemarketing (who everyone hates anyway) and make them answer the Customer Service phones instead.

* DarknessInducedAudienceApathy: {{Invoked}}. The end result of the Bob Humpty/Bill Dumpty election mentioned above? No one voted. Not even the two candidates themselves.

* [[ElSpanishO Der Germanen]]: From ''Dave Barry Does Japan'':
-->"One could see a sign for 'Goendownenundergroundenpayenfairenridearoundentrainen' and easily deduce that it means 'subway.'"

-->''Since she put me down''\\
''I've got owls pukin' in my bed.''

* {{Mondegreen}}:[[invoked]] He devoted an entire chapter to this in ''Dave Barry's Book of Bad Songs,'' commenting that his bad song voting produced many votes for "Ain't No Woman Like the One-Eyed Gott." He had a lengthy section on various attempts to spell the chorus of "The Lion Sleeps Tonight," and the chapter began with his misinterpretation of the Beach Boys' song "Help Me Rhonda."

* TheAbridgedHistory: some of his works, notably the book [[Literature/DaveBarrySleptHere]] and his "Year in Review" series, employ this trope.

* AmazinglyEmbarrassingParents: Barry is one himself, and many of his columns make note of this. He once picked his son up from school in the Oscar Meyer Weinermobile.
** When writing about how Billy Joel's daughter begged him (Joel) not to sing in public:

* AuthorCatchphrase: "I am not making this up" (This is usually a lie) and AGoodNameForARockBand.

* ClusterFBomb: Parodied ''Film/TheBlairWitchProject''. He wrote a "sample" of the dialogue, replacing the f-bomb with the word "darn"

* TheCollectorOfTheStrange: Barry owns [[http://maryland.lib.overdrive.com/3C32564B-169B-4439-9E9E-C4C72BF0C15D/10/295/en/ContentDetails.htm?ID={72CA3615-33EE-4F89-AC6C-5BC180DF55E3} everything on this list]].

** ''Dave Barry Turns 50'' has a few moments in his year-by-year chronology when he gives his viewpoints on the issues of the day, including observations on the UsefulNotes/CivilRightsMovement of the 1960s, and attacking the politicians who helped start the Vietnam War.

** ''Boogers Are My Beat'' ends with serious columns written on 9/11 and one year later. In the author's notes he remarks that many people have requested that he speak on serious issues more often, since he has an outlook and tone that comforts them. Dave immediately counters with the observation that he wishes precisely the opposite, since such essays require something ''horrible'' to happen. And he wouldn't wish that for anything; he'd rather stick to the booger jokes.

He's also one of the few people to get a sitcom based on himself, called ''Dave's World''. It aired from 1993 to 1997 on CBS, with Barry portrayed by Harry Anderson.