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Live Blog Let's MST: Bad song lyrics and other stuff (but mostly bad songs)
mst3kluv2011-01-13 16:48:21

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Low, by Flo Rida, proves that pop music does have low standards.


(feat. T-Pain)

MIKE: Is there anything that T-Pain WON’T feature on?

[Chorus:]

Shawty had them Apple Bottom Jeans (Jeans)

Boots with the fur (With the fur)

CROW: PETA was quick to throw paint at her.

The whole club was lookin at her

She hit the flo (She hit the flo)

Next thing you know'

TOM: An ambulance arrived.

Shawty got low low low low low low low low

MIKE: Much like Flo Rida’s chance of having a lasting career.

Them baggy sweat pants

And the Reeboks with the straps (With the straps)

TOM: I thought she was wearing Apple Bottom jeans and fur boots?

She turned around and gave that big booty a smack (Ayy)

She hit the flo (She hit the flo)

Next thing you know

CROW: The club burned down.

Shawty got low low low low low low low low

MIKE: I think eight is enough, Flo Rida.

[Verse 1:]

I ain't never seen nuthin that'll make me go,

This crazy all night spendin my dough

MIKE: I can tell that this song is going to be an inspirational classic.

Had a million dollar vibe and a bottle to go

Dem birthday cakes, they stole the show

CROW: Is there a birthday party here? Why can’t my birthday parties ever be this cool?

So sexual, she was flexible

Professional, drinkin X and ooo

TOM: Sorry, folks, Flo Rida’s just found something shiny. He’ll be back in a minute.

Hold up wait a minute, do I see what I think I

Whoa

MIKE [Flo Rida]: There really IS a candy mountain!!

Did I think I seen shorty get low

Ain't the same when it's up that close

Make it rain, I'm makin it snow

ALL: Eww!!

Work the pole, I got the bank roll

I'm a say that I prefer them no clothes

CROW: Yeah, you and every other heterosexual guy on the planet.

I'm into that, I love women exposed

She threw it back at me, I gave her more

TOM: Y’know, maybe she DOESN’T want your cash, Flo Rida. Ever think of that?

Cash ain't a problem, I know where it goes

MIKE: In the bank to accumulate interest?

She had them

[Chorus:]

Apple Bottom Jeans (Jeans)

CROW: Mike, why do humans wear such weird clothes?

MIKE: I don’t know.

Boots with the fur (With the fur)

The whole club was lookin at her

TOM: Ah, see, it was probably because she was wearing the boots with the fur after Labour Day.

She hit the flo (She hit the flo)

Next thing you know

'Shawty got low low low low low low low low

MIKE: Is that the chance that anyone’s going to remember this song?

Them baggy sweat pants

And the Reeboks with the straps (With the straps)

TOM: She must have the power to change her clothes instantly.

She turned around and gave that big booty a smack (Ayy)

She hit the flo (She hit the flo)

Next thing you know

CROW [Flo Rida]: I called the cops.

Shawty got low low low low low low low low

[Verse 2:]

Hey

Shawty what I gotta do to get you home

MIKE: Beat Super Mario Bros: The Lost Levels without dying?

My jeans full of gwap

And they ready for Shones

Cadillacs Maybachs for the sexy grown

Patrone on the rocks that'll make you moan

TOM: I didn’t know that women got aroused by expensive liquor and cars.

One stack (come on)

Two stacks (come on)

CROW: Mike? Why is Flo Rida talking about stacks of pancakes?

MIKE: I guess he was hungry.

Three stacks (come on, now that's three grand)

What you think I'm playin baby girl

I'm the man, I'll bend the rubber bands

MIKE: After all, no woman can resist the charms of Flo Rida and his cash!!

That's what I told her, her legs on my shoulder

I knew it was ova, that Henny and Cola

Got me like a Soldier

TOM: Yeah, a drunk one who fires at everything in sight.

She ready for Rover, I couldn't control her

So lucky oo me, I was just like a clover

CROW: You sat around waiting to be picked?

Shorty was hot like a toaster

MIKE: Behold! The unsexiest simile ever!

Sorry but I had to fold her,

Like a pornography poster

TOM: She must be a contortionist.

CROW: Either that or Flo Rida has no understanding of how flexible human bodies are.

She showed her

[Chorus:]

Apple Bottom Jeans (Jeans)

Boots with the fur (With the fur)

The whole club was lookin at her

MIKE: Yeah, who wears Apple Bottom Jeans anymore?

She hit the flo (She hit the flo)

Next thing you know

Shawty got low low low low low low low low

CROW: Much like Flo Rida’s sense of shame.

Them baggy sweat pants

And the Reeboks with the straps (With the straps)

TOM: So, guys, is Flo Rida talking about the same person here? I’m confused.

She turned around and gave that big booty a smack (Ayy)

She hit the flo (She hit the flo)

MIKE: Dunno. He could talking about identical twins.

Next thing you know

Shawty got low low low low low low low low

[Verse 3:]

Whoa

Shawty

CROW [Flo Rida]: The Matrix IS an awesome movie!!

Yea she was worth the money

Lil mama took my cash,

TOM: Ah, yes, the EXCITING resolution to the GRIPPING cash subplot!!

And I ain't want it back,

The way she bit that rag,

Got her them paper stacks,

TOM: Paying someone in pads of paper seems a little cheap to me, but what do I know?

Tatto above her crack,

I had to handle that,

CROW: Yes, we can all trust Flo Rida to guard us from those dangerous tattoos!!

I was on it, sexy woman, let me shownin

They be want it two in the mornin

I'm zonin in them rosay bottles foamin

MIKE: I can see that Flo Rida went to the Hurricane Chris school of lyrics

She wouldn't stop, made it drop

Shorty did that pop and lock,

Had to break her off that gwap

TOM: What? Is Flo Rida’s money secretly laced with drugs?

Gah it was fly just like my glock

[Chorus:]

Apple Bottom Jeans (Jeans)

CROW: So why do Apple Bottom Jeans exist?

Boots with the fur (With the fur)

The whole club was lookin at her

MIKE: Probably to go with the fur boots she’s wearing.

She hit the flo (She hit the flo)

Next thing you know

Shawty got low low low low low low low low

TOM: But why would everyone in the club be looking at her? Granted, Flo Rida was probably using hyperbole, but, in any case, why?

Them baggy sweat pants

And the Reeboks with the straps (With the straps)

MIKE: Maybe Apple Bottom Jeans are some kind of weird fashion trend?

She turned around and gave that big booty a smack (Ayy)

She hit the flo (She hit the flo)

Next thing you know

CROW: Or maybe she glued actual apple bottoms to her jeans.

Shawty got low low low low low low low low

MIKE: Hmm, I never thought of that.

TOM: Good point, Crow.

C'mon

TOM: But any case, Flo Rida still wants everyone to know, that Shawty got low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low.


This song is bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. I don't see why Flo Rida still has a career.

Comments

Feb 10th 2012 at 12:54:03 PM
"'Shawty got low low low low low low low low

MIKE: Is that the chance that anyone’s going to remember this song? "

I wish I didn't remember this song. I loved the commentary, though!
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