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6->''"You come to Detroit and you rent a Beamer? That's like going to Germany and eating Jimmy Dean sausages!"''
7-->-- '''Rick Jarmin'''
8
9''Bird on a Wire'' is a 1990 comedy film starring Creator/MelGibson and Creator/GoldieHawn, directed by John Badham, and shot mainly in British Columbia, Canada. The alley motorcycle chase scene was filmed in Victoria BC's [[FriendlyLocalChinatown Chinatown]], in Fan Tan Alley.
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11Rick Jarmin (Gibson) is put in witness protection after he helps the FBI bust drug dealer Eugene Sorenson (Creator/DavidCarradine). Fifteen years later, he is living with a new identity as a gas station attendant in Detroit. When his old girlfriend Marianne Graves (Hawn) stops at the gas station and recognizes him, his cover gets blown. The recently released Sorenson finds out, and both Rick and Marianne have to flee across the country with the vengeful Sorenson in hot pursuit.
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14!! This film contains examples of the following tropes:
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16* TheAce: Rick develops a ''lot'' of skills during his time in WitnessProtection, due to the various identities he's had over the years. All of his ideas at the ranch/veterinary hospital apparently worked perfectly.
17* ArtisticLicenseGeography: The "DETROIT TO RACINE" ferry. Putting aside the [[CaliforniaDoubling actual location of the shoot]], Detroit is on the wrong side of Michigan for such a ferry to even be practical, while Racine doesn't even have a dock capable of handling such a ferry.
18* CallBack: Rick uses a backwards headbutt in order to escape some cops who try to cuff him early on in the film. He tries it again against Weyburn, but it proves ineffective, as Weyburn easily dodges it, even asking Rick what he's doing.
19%%* ConvenientEscapeBoat
20* CrooksAreBetterArmed: The clímax involves Rick trying to take out the bad guys by improvising with the contents of a zoo display and a tranquilizer pistol. Sorenson and Diggs, on their end, are packing assault rifles that they blast with trigger-happy abandon.
21%%* DamselInDistress: Marianne Graves.
22* DirtyCop: Sorenson and Diggs are both ex-DEA agents gone bad. Both of them were involved in drug smuggling and Sorenson actually did time for this. There's also Weyburn, who's a dirty FBI agent, working for Sorenson and Diggs.
23* DutchAngle: The movie makes use of them particularly during action sequences.
24* EarnYourHappyEnding: It takes a brutal SternChase, but in the end Marianne and Rick rekindle their love, kill the criminals out to get them, and go live on a sailboat in the Bahamas.
25* EatenAlive: After he is lured by Rick into an animal cage, Diggs is mauled and eaten by a lioness. In a struggle, Rick managed to kick Weyburn into a pool inhabited by [[PiranhaProblem a swarm of ravenous piranhas]].
26* {{Fanservice}}: Both stars exhibit their behinds at different points.
27* FauxYay: One of Rick's previous identities was that of a CampGay hairdresser, much to Marianne's amusement.
28* HighVoltageDeath: On a ruined bridge, Rick managed to give Sorenson a nasty electric shock using an electric fence and himself as a makeshift conduit. Sorenson let go of the bridge and fell onto the fence itself, finally electrocuting him to death. Rick barely survived with Marianne's help.
29* JerkWithAHeartOfGold: Rick Jarmin is an extremely snarky rogue who keeps a lot of secrets from Marianne, but he has helped improve the businesses of the people he worked under as part of his WitnessProtection identities and makes obvious he always pined for Marianne.
30* NoOSHACompliance: The zoo in which the final battle takes place. Let's count the ways: 1) Mixing leopards and tigers in the same space. 2) putting chimpanzees and baboons in the same habitat then 3) allowing aforementioned leopards and tigers access to the monkey habitat 4) also, crocodiles and snakes and 5) rickety bridge/ledge that connects with 6) unsecured artificial waterfall that fills artificial lake filled with 6) wholly natural piranhas!
31** At least the rickety bridge was not intended for human use; but it may be dangerous for the animals as well.
32* RoomDisservice: Attempted, but failed thanks to Rick being smart enough to be suspicious.
33* SafeZoneHopeSpot: Rick spends the entire film traveling to the home of his old WitnessProtection handler hoping that he will be able to help him regarding the current situation (Weyburn, his new handler, not only is a goon of TheCartel Sorenson and Diggs work for but also [[{{Unperson}} deleted Rick's case file]]), only to discover that 1) said old handler retired because he is suffering from Alzheimer's and 2) [[UnwantedAssistance Marianne called Witness Protection behind Rick's back thinking they would help]], which means Diggs, Sorenson and Weyburn are [[OhCrap ten seconds away from kicking the door down and start shooting]].
34* ScaryBlackMan: Diggs is calm and collected at all times [[spoiler: except at his death]] with an icy demeanour befitting a ProfessionalKiller. Par for the course for a character played by Bill Duke.
35* SceneryPorn: The ferry ride shows some nice vistas of (the Vancouver side of) Lake Michigan.
36* ShotInTheAss: Happens to Rick early on. Luckily for him, it's done with a ShortRangeShotgun, so the pellets don't do much damage, though he does seem to be in visible pain from it for the rest of the film.
37* ShoutOut: Fan Tan Alley, where the motorcycle chase takes place, is actually referred to by the pursuers as Fan Tan Alley.
38* SkirtsAndLadders: The wind blows Marianne's skirt up as the duo is going up a ladder, displaying her [[ThongOfShielding underwear]] to the audience.
39* TitledAfterTheSong: The title refers to the Music/LeonardCohen song "Bird on the Wire".
40* [[CaliforniaDoubling Vancouver Doubling]] (and ''Victoria'' doubling).
41* WitlessProtectionProgram: Rick is not found merely because of his girlfriend, but because his old handler retired and the new one sold him out.
42* WitnessProtection: The film starts with Rick's cover being blown by his ex-girlfriend. After 15 years of hiding and several different identities. The title means that if he touches any of his previous lives, he may die like a bird that touches two live wires.

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