History Funny / HouseOfCardsUS

* Tom Hammerschmidt is forced by Remy to do a drinking game called Never Have I Ever to get information. The premise of the game is that Hammerschmidt says to Remy an abuse of power that he believes Frank has committed while in office. If the allegation is true, Remy takes a drink. If the allegation is not true, Remy doesn't drink at all. Remy ends up consuming all of his first glass pretty quickly.

* Donald Blythe's whole awkwardness during his brief time as acting president. You can really tell how lost he is when there's nobody telling him what to do.
* When Frank watches a video of Will Conway playing with his children:
--> '''Frank Underwood:''' [[CallBack You guessed it: I still hate children.]]

--> '''Doug Stamper:''' You're talking to the President.
--> '''[=LeAnn=] Harvey:''' I know, I recognized his voice.

* Frank vs. Claire's mother: "I'm still white trash, I just happen to be white trash that lives in the White House."

* Tom Hammerschmidt is forced by Remy to do a drinking game called Never Have I Ever to get information.

-->'''Frank Underwood:''' Senator Dean Austen of Ohio, the leadership's top choice for running mate. ''[ticks off on his fingers]'' Twelve years in Congress, helps us with a major swing state, middle of the road, very few enemies, and most importantly to them, long-time friend of the NRA. Now his shortcomings are ''[ticks off on his fingers]'' he's another middle-aged white guy, underwhelming, unimaginative and a long-time friend of the NRA. [[FlippingTheBird So you can see how I feel about the leadership's choice.]]

* Tom Hammerschmidt is forced by Remy to do a drinking game called Never / Have I Ever to get information for information.

* When Frank watches a video of his opponent Jack Conway playing with his children, he gives a callback to Peter Russo's kids.
--> '''Frank Underwood:''' You guessed it, I still hate children.

--> '''Doug Stamper:''' You're talking to the president.

* Frank vs Claire's mother: "I'm still white trash, I just happen to be white trash that lives in the White House."

* When Frank watches a video of his opponent Jack Conway playing with his children, he gives a callback.

--> '''Doug:''' You're talking to the president.
--> '''[=LeAnn=]:''' I know, I recognized his voice.

* The = look Underwood gives the audience when Tusk mentions he has a birdfeeder on the roof of the latter's building.

* At the end of Chapter 1, everyone is reacting to the leak of the education bill with various expressions of OhCrap. Then, it cuts to Zoe Barnes, who is...[[VisualPun on the crapper.]]

-->'''Frank Underwood:''' I don't know about you, but if it really is anthrax and these are our final moments, I want to die with a buzz on.

--->'''Frank Underwood:''' UsefulNotes/MargaretThatcher died. [[BlatantLies I was in mourning]].

* After a sex scene between Kate Baldwin and Thomas Yates, we get this one-liner that happens only thanks to Frank's picture being in the background:

-->'''Frank:''' (looking at the camera like he's only now realized that we were in the room the whole time he was arguing) What are you looking at?

--->'''Frank Underwood:''' MargaretThatcher died. [[BlatantLies I was in mourning]].

** With Ed Henry in place of Russo, Frank parodies the "absolute ''unquestioning'' loyalty" scene, but in doing so, he asks for "42 seconds during the dinner to say ''whatever I want''." Ed Henry nonchalantly says "Take 45." This cues Frank ending the sketch with a monologue that is exactly 45 seconds long, at the end of which, we see that he still has Ed's Big Gulp.
* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W7pmnIitgeI Frank Underwood prank calls Hilary Clinton while posing as]] UsefulNotes/BillClinton.

** If you freeze-frame it, the names of some of the other remixes in the Suggested Videos list are just as hilarious, including ''Underwood Rocks the "House" - Get it?'', ''Congressional [=A(E)iOUs=],'' ''Eh Ee Ah Oh You,'' ''[[IsntItIronic Isn't It E-ronic]]?'', ''Political Indy-Pop: Starring Frank E'','' 'Under' the Influence'', and ''Y don't u try it without E''.

* Peter Russo's kids run around the office and one of them bumps into Frank, making him spill his coffee. To Russo's face he says it's fine but to the audience...
--> '''Frank Underwood:''' I'm not going to lie, I despise children... there, I said it.

* After Claire screws over the Watershed Bill, Frank says something you ''never'' ask a Woman of a Certain Age: "Is it the hot flashes?"

** Even more hilarious are the names of some other remixes in the Suggested Videos list, like ''Underwood Rocks the "House" - Get it?'', ''Congressional [=A(E)iOUs=],'' ''Eh Ee Ah Oh You,'' ''[[IsntItIronic Isn't It E-ronic]]?'', ''Political Indy-Pop: Starring Frank E'', and '' 'Under' the Influence''.

* After Claire screws over the Watershed Bill, Frank brings up something you ''never'' ask a Woman of a Certain Age: "Is it the hot flashes?"

* Here's some BlackComedy that's sort of like the church scene in season 3: After killing Russo, Frank tries speaking to God at a church. Upon receiving no answer, he glances at us, says "Perhaps I'm speaking to the wrong audience," then turns his head down and reveals he's actually addressing {{Satan}}.

* The time where Peter Russo's kids run around the office and one of them bumps into Frank, making him spill his coffee. To Russo's face he says it's fine but to the audience...

-->'''Cop''': I don't care if you're the King of China.

* Chapter 3's entire subplot involving the Peachoid, which is a real-life water tower in Frank's hometown of Gaffney, South Carolina.

* Frank is practicing in anticipation of throwing the first pitch at a baseball game. His story of how the first time he threw the first pitch he did it from the mound and the ball didn't make it is funny in and of itself. However, while practicing (with Meechum as catcher) and vowing to not embarrass himself this time, he breaks a garden vase they were using as the plate. After the plant holder shatters:

--> '''Claire:''' (from inside the house) I heard that.
* After Walker lashes out in Chapter 20, Frank retaliates by buying him a literal punching bag and placing it in the Oval Office. Walker's expression when he sees it is priceless. And his [[ActuallyPrettyFunny cheeky grin]] when he sees the handwritten note Frank has sent with the bag.

* Frank's [[RageAgainstTheHeavens rejection of Christ]], ending with him [[SpitefulSpit spitting]] at the crucifix in the National Cathedral? Not that funny. Frank realizing that he just left spittle on the crucifix and trying to wipe it off? Funny. Frank accidentally knocking the crucifix over and [[CrossesTheLineTwice shattering it on the stone floor]]? Hilarious. Frank quickly pocketing one of the pieces, showing it to the camera as he walks out and saying "NOW [[ExactWords I've got God's ear]]"? ''Priceless''.
* Frank's BreakingTheFourthWall speech comes to scrutiny in Season 3, when an Alzheimer-ridden judge seems to hear it.

-->'''Frank:''' (looks into camera) What are you looking at?

-->'''Frank Underwood:''' You can't run for Mayor again, Mike. That'll put Anthony Weiner in a pickle and then he'll tweet that pickle.