Were you expecting another glowing review, calling the game an emotional masterpiece and the greatest game made in 2012? Heh heh...WRONG!!! Mass Effect 3 is an insult to the franchise and a slap in the face to long time fans, but not in the way you're thinking. Sure the ending is so bad it bends space and retroactively ruins the rest of the trilogy, but it's just the cherry on top of the fail sundae. If you're in hurry, here's a four word summary: Your Choices Don't Matter. Basically every choice you've made in the past is awkwardly retconned so that sequences are largely the same, save minute differences in dialogue. Speaking of which, the writing took a high dive into a toilet since ME 2; The plot revolves around a huge space dildo that has the words "Deus Ex Machina"(tm) written in three story tall letters on the side. This oversized sex toy is treated as the galaxy's Hail Mary, despite knowing nothing about it, and knowing the last giant Prothean device they found (the Citadel) was actually a Reaper trap. For all they know the device could actually be a giant enslavement gizmo, or an enormous lava lamp. But enough about writing, what of the gameplay? I'm so glad you asked. It's Gears Of War. They aren't even trying to hide it anymore, but it's Gears with a !Future! paintjob. Battles are pathetic and underwhelming, doubly so if you've played multiplayer (and you have to to get the (fingerquotes) best ending), which piles on five times the enemies and pairs you with actually competent squadmates. There are about five actions attached to one button, leading to moments of frustration as you fruitlessly try to grab the gun on top of a cover object and end up welding your butt to it. Levels are incredibly linear, and combat makes up the bulk of the game. Sidequests are pretty much the same thing: scan a planet, find a dohicky, bring it back to the guy you eavesdropped on. That's right, you don't even get to talk to quest givers, instead you have to voyeuristically listen to them bitch about some problem and bring the exact thing they needed back. Words fail me. I could fill an entire wiki in and of itself with all the problems I have with this game, but I only have 400 words to do it, so here's my final thoughts: Play Borderlands 2. Play Skyrim. Play anything but this.
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