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Elbruno
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03:13:01 PM Jan 23rd 2014

Games discussed:

  • Aloneinthe Dark (2006): Finds it ironic that while Resident Evil copied the style and gameplay of the first Alone, this one copies the style and gameplay of Resident Evil 4. He thinks the game has a lot of interesting ideas, just too many of them and that more time should’ve been spent refining what the developers had instead of adding more and more. Gives the game a score of “Too Much Candy”/10

  • Blackthorne: Very positive, saying that despite its core as a cinematic platformer it manages to provide interesting combat and puzzles, and that the main character Kyle Blackthorne may be one of the coolest characters in gaming history. Jared enthusiastically gives the game a “One armed, no-look, behind-the-back, shotgun blast”/10

  • Dragonball Z Sagas: Calls it the worst Dragonball Z RPG made, and was one of his first reviews back on GameFAQs. While its role as a co-op Dragonball Z game is unique, it’s not worth playing, giving the game a Krillin/10

  • Drake of the 99 Dragons: The worst game Jared has ever played by his admission. He finds it insulting how the developers but so little effort into the game yet it expected it to be bigger then was it was. Gave it a Bucket of Tears/10

  • The Secret Island of Dr. Quandary: The educational game that Jared played when he was younger, now reflecting that despite its place as child edutainment, “it’s fundamentally a point and click adventure game with some educational puzzles that are quite good for the developing mind.” Noting that he feels the game made him smarter as a kid, but also that some of the puzzles were way past the recommended age of 6 and up. Gave it a Mensa/10

  • Final Fantasy Mystic Quest: Despite common knowledge that the game was intentionally easy as a gateway JRPG, Jared notes that the game was really hard to play through as “I could feel my brain slowly becoming mush while I was playing it.” It does its job, but its lack of challenge that may dissuade veteran gamers and its hand-holding turning newbie away gives it an identity crisis. Given a score of a Training Wheel/10

  • Haven & Hearth: Not an actual review as the game was still in Alpha state, but Jared found the game very addicting and intriguing with its unique stat system and threat of permanent death. Unfortunately the chance of a proper review is unlikely, as Jared was burned off the game following a period of rapid griefing against him after the video aired.

  • Hydlide: A game from Jared’s past that haunts him to this day, Jared fins the game infuriating given its rampant difficulty, useless spells, tedious grinding and broken save system. This would be the start of a trilogy of Hydlide reviews, and Jared gives this game a Bee Sting/10

  • Pocky & Rocky: His first collaberation review with Peanut Butter Gamer. The game’s visuals and design scream cute, but it’s brutally difficult, but enjoyable all the same. Gives the game a Kitten-Goblin/10

  • Super Hydlide: The second Hydlide review that was premiered at SGC 2013, the game has a lot of interesting and more unique aspects that while not working perfectly, still leads to some interesting moments and gameplay. There was one blunder where the game actually allows you to throw away plot-crucial items, forcing a complete restart, but in the end Jared find the game clunky, but cool, highlighted in his score of a Space Suit/10

  • Virtual Hydlide: Jared ended the previous Hydlide review by stating that this one was the worst. The digitized graphics make the game extremely cumbersome and give massive frame drop, the randomly generated maps only change the overworld locations, and given that the game is essentially a remake of the first has zero plot. Jared gives the final Hydlide game appropriately a Hydlide/10

  • Quest 64: Quite negative, especially given the hype at the time of release. Jared fins the game a grind-fest given that there is no even way to grow your character, adding that “the stats the game expects you to have, ultimately doubles your time spent grinding.” Given a Shannon/10

  • Two Worlds: Jared made his first Youtube video specifically to address the lack of Hype Backlash that this game received. He goes into exquisite detail over how terrible the game is programmed, structured and designed, even going as far as blatantly cheating in order to finish the game due the game “stealing $60” from him. In the end, he gives the game a Cancelled Christmas/10

  • Two Worlds II: Jared also started his Youtube channel in order to give this game a review when it came out. When he was finally able to play it Jared admitted it wasn’t as bad as he was expecting, calling it a “decent hack and slash loot fest” that might be worth a pick up if you can find it for under $30. Jared gave the game a score of a Vaccine Shot/10

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