Roll To Dodge: I'm rather surprised to not find this here.

The markup help has something about quotes, but I have no clue how they work.

Oh, and give me a save vs. Head Asplosion.

I try to skydive from 10,000 feet.

Satisfied with my progress so far, I walk out of the range, then I bump into an obviously drunk skinhead. He challenges me to a fight, and he is much bigger and stronger than me.

I like the Your Head Asplode save.

edited 7th Apr '10 7:57:01 AM by Plumbum

Frustrated, I open a window and attempt to throw the game out of it.

Frustrated, I open a window and attempt to throw the game out of it.

I lol'd. I'll lol harder if it fails.

Kitten of Doom: Save against Head Asplosion: [1] [Impossible Action] Your sanity is extremely dented by the webpage, although it is a small mercy that you barely manage to keep hold of your mind.

as for skydiving from 10,000 feet: [5] You skydive like a professional. You're offered the opportunity to skydive in a competition.

Plumbum: [5] You effortlessly beat down the skinhead, who is much less powerful than he looks. An attractive female gives you a kiss of admiration and says "My hero!" for no discernable reason.

Ozbourne: [6] You throw the game hard out of the window. Unfortunately, there is a trampoline below you and the console immediately bounces back up and gives you a hard smack on the head. It hurts badly.

edited 7th Apr '10 8:02:14 AM by Flanker66

Ozbourne: [6] You throw the game hard out of the window. Unfortunately, there is a trampoline below you and the console immediately bounces back up and gives you a hard smack on the head. It hurts badly.

I lol'd so hard I have to go to hospital for split sides.

I try to kick the skinhead while he's down.

(See? Dice hate me!)

I attempt to find out if I have a concussion.

Plumbum: [6] [Free Action] You kick him so hard his neck almost snaps. Luckily, he only seems to whimper softly and your reputation hasn't been harmed.

Ozbourne: [3] You feel around your forehead, looking for any obvious signs of damage/concussion. The most you can ascertain is a small bump and slight wooziness. Perhaps you should lie down.

Meanwhile, Lemurian's trying to No Continue Clear Perfect Cherry Blossom.

I pray that I haven't been emotionally unstabilised by nearly killing a guy.

I stretch out on the sofa and attempt not to fall asleep just in case.

Lemurian: [6] You succeed so well that during your post-win celebration you delete your save file.

Plumbum: [2] You suddenly feel extremely indifferent about the guy's plight. He had it coming, anyway.

Ozbourne: [1] You trip as you walk over to the sofa. Gritting your teeth, you get onto the sofa and promptly fall off. It's just not your day...

edited 7th Apr '10 8:16:04 AM by Flanker66

I try to help Ozbourne not be the personification of Epic Fail.

I attempt to sit really still so as to avoid hurting myself again.

Plumbum: [5] You assist Ozbourne by phoning a doctor, putting an ice pack on his/her head and generally warding off his/her bad luck. You're an all-round cool guy.

Ozbourne: [1] [Free Action] You manage to sit still, although you still fidget.

edited 7th Apr '10 8:24:12 AM by Flanker66

I attempt to call the GM (you) out on a shmup-related fault: Touhou has no save files.

I use the Arcle to transform.

Awe Striker: [1] All of your arguments fail to convince me to believe Touhou has no save files (even showing me the game itself).

Kinkajou: [4] The transformation sequence goes as expected as you use the Arcle. Ta-dah!

I attempt to pester Enlong, Lemurian, and/or Zudak to see if they'll do any better.

Awe Striker: [6] You convince all of them. Unfortunately, you end up convincing them that Touhou does have save files. Looks like you're on your own.

edited 7th Apr '10 8:45:37 AM by Flanker66

I put on my "The dice are trying to kill me" shirt.

Awe Striker: [3] Although it's unusually tight, you manage to put it on. The dice might just be having a bad day...

Trying to escape from my insanity through suicidal sports, I enter the skydiving competition.

edited 7th Apr '10 9:21:13 AM by KittenOfDoom

Kitten of Doom: [6] You do spectacularly well as you pull all sorts of stunts. However, you barely manage to avoid becoming a bloody smear on the ground because you almost didn't pull your parachute's toggle in time. You weakly decline continuing in the competition. Perhaps your mind wasn't shattered after all...

edited 7th Apr '10 9:32:23 AM by Flanker66

I attempt to return in style.