I think we decided that they won't be driving anything into the swamp—they don't have an amphibious vehicle. They'll be on foot. Maybe instead of preparing a vehicle, they should all put on wading boots?

Also, Dropbear, while this is a minor thing, I want to change Kara's line "I don't want to be fixing you guys up all tomorrow" to "I don't want to spend all day tomorrow fixing you guys up." I think my wording sounds more natural and more like something I would say, and since this Karalora is just me with the serial numbers filed off...So Yeah.

I've taken a look at the map: there are some dirt roads that could get them a decent portion of the way to the area where the hydra is—all the more reason to take a pickup truck. Beyond that, there are some trails...dunno if the truck could be driven on them, but the tropers certainly could walk them and see if there are any obvious areas where a very large animal broke through the trees.

I'm bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me.

The hydra could have destroyed some of those roads, making them impassable, though.

Video Game Census. Please contribute.

True. Of course, if they come across a bit where the road is destroyed, that will give them clues as to where the hydra is.

I'm bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me.

I like this idea, actually. It's probably a good move for us to showcase as many of the main characters' goodies in the pilot as we can without forcing it. And it will make the earlier sequence with them unhitching the pickup less pointless.

Scene 6 (Dialog half)

Original Draft by arks, minor revisions courtesy of arks, Kara, Ironeye, Jinxed, Kyler, and Matrix

Kara: We can't let this guy be part of the team.

Hikari: Why not?

Cody: But we can't let him roam free out here. Who knows what he might do?

Kara: You've got a point there.

Matrix: Why can't we take him along? His power's cool.

Kara: We don't know if he can control it. He's a hazard.

arks: Is he a fictite?

Hikari: No, I'm not.

Murky: Does it matter?

arks: Well it might change how we deal with him.

Hikari: I'm not fictional.

Ironeye: So can anyone think of a fictional character that fits his description?

[short pause while the various members think]

Cody: I'm drawing a blank.

Matrix: Me too. See? He's fine.

Kara: Well, let's keep in mind the possibility that he may be fictional, but assume for now that he's human.

Ironeye: I'd like to study his abilities a bit under controlled conditions—it might provide valuable information.

Matrix: Plus can you imagine what I could do with wind powers?

Cody: Use the wrong power more often?

Kara: I guess our best course of action is to take him with us. At least then we can keep an eye on him.

Cody: We'd have to restrain him of course. What kind of restraints to we have back in the RV? Rope, handcuffs, anything like that?

[Everyone turns to look at Ironeye]

Ironeye: What?

arks: Considering his powers, we might have to keep him in a box. Probably one made of steel, or lead. Something like that.

Matrix: You wouldn't be able to find a lead box large enough to fit a person inside!

Ironeye: Well, if we...[random musing]

Kara: I don't think that's practical.

[arks and Ironeye look dejected]

Murky: This is too much effort. Let's just kill him.

Hikari: What?

Kara: No. We aren't murderers.

Murky: With that ability of his, he could level cities. Probably already has. It's better this way.

Ironeye: We're keeping him alive—I can't learn anything from him if he's dead.

Hikari: Yes! Listen to him!

Ironeye: Besides, I can always kill him later.

Hikari: I don't want to die!

Cody: Ironeye has a point: we don't know anything about him. Is he good or evil, and if he's good, is his method of doing good practical for this world? If it's not, then we can kill him.

Kara: We are not killing him!

arks: We could just incapacitate him, you know. A quick hit to the back of the head, leave him in the middle of nowhere.

Murky: Maybe then the environment will kill him.

Hikari: Why does this conversation keep on returning to my death?

Cody: [to Hikari] Will you please shut up? This doesn't concern you.

Hikari: How does this not concern me?

Switch camera to out of huddle, focusing on Hikari. He turns to look behind him (at the camera/back where the hydra was) and gets a worried look on his face.

Matrix: Of course it concerns him! You're talking about his death!

Hikari: [a little nervous] Uhh, excuse me...

Cody: No it doesn't. He doesn't have any say in what we choose.

Hikari: [more nervous] Um, guys?

arks: But, I mean. What we do choose does have a large effect on what happens to him.

Ironeye: [absentmindedly] Well, if you think about the meaning of the word "concern"...

Hikari: [agitated] Guys?

Kara: Must every conversation derail into semantics? Let's get back on topic.

Hikari: [yelling] Guys!

Kara: [exasperated] What?

Hikari: That monster thing is still alive.

edited 2nd Feb '10 6:22:37 PM by Ironeye

I'm bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me.

Hee, nice. Will we have monster noises coming in towards the end, or will that be a surprise?

Minor line nitpick - I think Cody would be more likely to talk in terms of "good or evil" rather than "a hero or a villain", unless he still thought Hikari was a fictite.

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Oh, oops, we cut that bit out on accident. I'll fix both that and Cody's line.

I'm bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me.

Okay, here's what we on vent have written for scene 5 so far. We would have written more but Etherpad is down for some reason.

[cut to the pickup truck, MATRIX and MURKY are in the bed, ARKS is driving, IRONEYE is in the front passenger seat, KARALORA and CODY are in the back passenger seats; MATRIX is acting as lookout from his vantage point while MURKY is tending to her naginata; a conversation is going on in the cab; IRONEYE is looking at a map]

IRONEYE: Okay, arks, just keep going down the road.

ARKS: Well it's a straight road. There's nothing else to do. There's no turns.

IRONEYE: I'm just letting you know the map doesn't show any turns either.

ARKS: I think I got this, Ironeye.

KARALORA: Both of you, cool it.

[A few beats]

CODY: So... Koopa Troopas.

ARKS: Can't we just jump on them?

KARALORA: With or without wings?

CODY: No, arks, we're not Mario. And Kara, without wings.

ARKS: Oh, right, the ones with wings are called Koopa Paratroopas.

KARALORA: Right. I knew that.

IRONEYE: Well, the good news is, we'd only have to manage to jump on one of them.

ARKS: Maybe we could climb a ladder for the first one.

KARALORA: Like we'd just *have* a ladder.

ARKS: The truck, then.

IRONEYE: Wait...are we assuming a two-dimensional battlefield?

KARALORA: Are they really that big? I mean, now that they're here. I always think of, you know, turtles. [Holds her hands about two feet apart]

CODY: Well, they're as big as regular Mario. I'd think that he's the size of a normal human.

ARKS: Maybe we should try to find him for reference.

IRONEYE: We might also have to consider strategies based on what color they are. For instance, a blue one—

MATRIX: [yelling] Arks watch out the road's blocked!

[ARKS pays attention to what's in front when MATRIX yells, looks surprised, pushes on the brakes; sudden squeak and squelch from the sudden stop, the truck skids and just barely misses ramming into the log in the way]

KARALORA: [to MATRIX and MURKY] You two okay back there?

MATRIX: [somewhat shaken] Nya...Uh... yeah...

MURKY: Yeah.

[The team gets out of the truck and takes a look at the huge log in their way.]

MURKY: Well, this is inconvenient.

MATRIX: This is gonna mean more time in the swamp, isn't it? Bleh... All that water. I'm sticking to the trees.

[MATRIX shifts into skitty form]

CODY: Would it be worth trying to shift this, or should we just walk the rest of the way?

IRONEYE: I don't think we could move this, even using the truck. This road isn't solid enough.

[MATRIX is on top of the log and shifts back to catboy form]

MATRIX: Hey guys! Nya! Look! There's a path. Goes right along with this log. Whatever made this trail must have knocked this thing over. I'm guessing it's our monster. So, the top of the tree is going that way [points in the direction of the top of the fallen tree] meaning the monster must be that way. Let's go! [shifts back into skitty form and takes to the trees]

[cut to the team walking through the swamp, skitty!MATRIX jumping through the treetops above]

edited 5th Feb '10 12:40:27 PM by Matrix

Oh and just as I posted it, Etherpad is back. -_-u

Well, whatever.

Also updated it with the single line we got down after Etherpad got back up >.>

edited 2nd Feb '10 8:31:27 PM by Matrix

Brilliant. I love it.

Another stupid nitpick: Cody's not the type to care about the difference between Koopa Troopas and Paratroopas. As far as he's concerned, they're "the turtles from Super Mario Bros."

I'm going to have to get on Vent more often, now that my exam is out the way.

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Done, and gave arks the paratroopa line.

Edited Scene Four. I can't find the URL for the Etherpad... Hmm.

Or you know, I could just go on the chat and be SOCIAL!

Help! I'm stuck in these tabs!

Yes, it would be convenient if you came on vent when we're all there doing stuff for the show so that you're not left out of the loop when it comes to writing.

I keep on forgetting to mention it, but can we change the arks line from "Jump in their head, duh" to "Can't we just jump on them." The "duh" is out of character for arks and seems more California than Midwest.

Video Game Census. Please contribute.

I keep on forgetting to mention it, but can we change the arks line from "Jump on their head, duh" to "Can't we just jump on them." The "duh" is out of character for arks and seems more California than Midwest.

Video Game Census. Please contribute.

Done.

The tentative title for the pilot is Who You Gonna Call?. Also being considered are We Help the Helpless, After the End, and A World Half Full. By the order of Big Dawg, we are trying to find a name that gives a feeling for the premise/setting of the show. Any now ideas, input on the current ones, etc. would be appreciated.

I'm bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me.

Yay, rewrites!

Scene 1: the Convergence

[Fade in on a view of Los Angeles, with the Hollywood sign visible in the shot. There is the appearance of breaking glass, and numerous film and TV characters, both live-action and animated, appear and begin attacking the populace.]

[Cut to view of Tokyo, where the same glass-breaking effect happens and Kaiju and anime characters appear.]

[Cut to view of Vancouver, being attacked by Goa'uld, monsters from The Neverending Story, and stampeding Jumanji animals.]

[Cut to London. BBC and book characters.]

[Cut to New York. The hordes there consist primarily of villains from superhero comics.]

[Fade out.]

Scene 2

[Shot of Grosse Tete, LA. The weather looks slightly hazy. The words "5 months later" appear on screen.]

[We see the mayor and two aides standing at the highway offramp, waiting.]

Aide 1: When did Mitch say they were due to arrive, sir?

Mayor: He couldn't pin down a time. These folks have a lot on their plate.

Aide 2: They'll be worth the wait. They're the best at what they do.

Aide 1: (taken aback) The best? Who else does it?

Aide 2: Uh...

[See Ironeye's outline for the description of the team's arrival.]

Aide 1: (muttering) Do you think they practice that?

Mayor: (muttering) Hush, you. (aloud) Welcome to our fair town of Grosse Tete! Not as fair as it could be, obviously, or you wouldn't be here.

[Karalora and Ironeye step forward.]

KARALORA: *nods* Hello, sir. I'm Karalora, this is Ironeye.

MAYOR: [beat] You don't hear names like "Ironeye" around these parts. Y'all get that from Transformers?

KARALORA: Well, sir, Ironeye - and Karalora, for that matter, are codenames. We don't want our real names getting around because of what some fictites might be able to do with them.

MAYOR: Ah, alright, then. You know, most of you five look a little young for this.

KARALORA: Yes, I know we probably don't look like much, but don't worry, sir, we'll get this done, I assure you. Oh, and there are six of us.

MAYOR: Six? Huh? [recounts] Oh, there's the other one. Sorry, son, I guess I missed you the first time around.

CODY: It's okay, I'm used to it.

MAYOR: So, shall we get down to business?

IRONEYE: Yes, definitely. Let's see: [speaking rapidly] about a few weeks ago, a poisonous haze started creeping into town from the swamp at night but recedes somewhat during the day, many people have gotten sick and a few have died, a large scaly creature of some kind has been spotted after dark near a lake to the west...oh, yes, and [reads from the pad] "certain metals are tarnishing faster than usual, leading to depreciation in property values". Did I miss anything?

[Two-three beats while the MAYOR mentally catches up.]

MAYOR: Ah...no, I do believe that pretty well covers it.

IRONEYE: Excellent. I'd like to interview the people who saw the creature—[rapidly interjecting] if it's not too much trouble, of course.

MAYOR: [taken aback] Uh, well, sure, I don't see why not. I'll round 'em up for you.

KARALORA: Okay, everyone, while Ironeye talks to the locals, let's gear up for a Grue Hunt, Krem Quay variation.

SCENE 3

[Cut to a diner, interior. A radio is clearly visible on the counter. Near the radio but out of focus is a WAITRESS who is drying glasses with a towel.]

NEWSCASTER (from radio):..the panda was unharmed. The individual believed to be responsible for the destruction in [X town] [X amount of time ago] is still at large. Once again, anyone seeing an individual matching [description] is advised to leave the area immediately and inform [someone]. If you have any information regarding this case, please contact [Pvt. Carrera] on band 15.

VOICE (off screen): Please, could you turn that off? [WAITRESS comes into focus with the radio leaving focus]

WAITRESS: Oh, alright, hun. [reaches over and switches off the radio]

[pan over to the origin of the VOICE, HIKARI, sitting at a table eating pie, and quickly finishes]

[WAITRESS walks over to HIKARI with a tray; on the tray is a cheque; the WAITRESS takes HIKARI's plate and hands him the cheque]

WAITRESS: You finished that up right quick. I take it it was pretty good then?

HIKARI: Yes, thank you! [looks at the bill and takes out some money and hands it to the WAITRESS] There sure are a lot of people out there. Is there some kind of... trouble?

[show the meeting between the TEAM and the MAYOR through the diner's windows, cut back to HIKARI and the WAITRESS]

WAITRESS: Oh, yeah, that's the mayor and a couple of his aides... You might say there's been trouble lately. Those other folks must be the ones the mayor's buddy in Baton Rouge told him about who solve problems like we've been having.

HIKARI: Hmm? Problems? What kind of problems?

WAITRESS: There's a poisonous mist that comes up at night. [looks distraught] Killed the tigers we kept around.

HIKARI: [anxious] A mist that can kill tigers!? [suddenly realising] Wait, tigers?

WAITRESS: Oh, yeah, they're what put this town on the map. Don't know what we'll do without 'em, unless we can get a new batch from somewhere. We don't even want to try until we can get rid of that monster or whatever it is, though.

HIKARI: [more excited than before, stands right up] A monster!?

WAITRESS: That's what folks are sayin'. Some kinda fictite monster. [HIKARI begins to stop paying attention] If you're plannin' on stayin' in town, you want to pick yourself up a germ mask to wear outside at night.

HIKARI: I see. [looking down] Hmmhmmhmmhmm.... It's time to get started! [Bird Runs out of the diner, knocking over a chair]

WAITRESS: [calling out to HIKARI] Hey! What? [beat] Well, it takes all kinds.

Scene 4

[Kara is in the pickup truck, grabbing a mass of bullet-proof vests and a handgun which she promptly sticks into the holster on her belt.]

Kara: OK team, protective gear on. I don't want to spend all day tomorrow fixing you guys up, so please try to stay out of trouble.

Cody [takes one from Kara with a smirk]: Yeah. Like that’s going to happen.

CUT TO: [Hikari looking through his backpack, before taking a black t-shirt]

CUT TO: [Team spaced out, some sitting down, others just leaning. All looking at Ironeye]

IRONEYE: So, putting together everything I gathered from Mitch's report and from the residents here, what we're dealing with here is a giant monster, probably reptilian, almost certainly semi-aquatic or amphibious. I have one report that says it was a giant walrus, two that indicate something more like a dragon, and one that calls it a brontosaurus, although we should bear in mind that this one came from a six-year-old. One person said it had two heads. A few reported a flying snake. Other details include: large pointy teeth, huge claws, feet like a chicken, hooves, noxious footprints, eyes made of fire, the face of an old woman, the ability to hypnotize, a tendency to sing as it attacks its prey, a preference for small children, acid spit, and having more than a passing resemblance to Madonna. Now some of these details may be exaggerations from the minds of people who were not in a position to make the best of observations at the time, but it's a start.

CUT TO: [Hikari dashing into the swamp with a grin on his face.]

CUT TO: [The team still picking up gear.]

Matrix [puts up a hand]: Nyaaa~... What about air masks or something? Wouldn’t that stop the poison?

Murky [examining her blade]: We don't have any. I checked.

Ironeye: No, but we've got these [holds up several surgical masks], which should be able to keep the particles out of our lungs. Just in case though, I don’t want us to be hanging around for too long. Anything could happen, so adapt to the situation.

Cody [loading bullets into rifle]: You mean make it up as we go along. [clicks it back into finished position] So, like every other plan.

arks: Well, it works, doesn’t it?

CUT TO: [Hikari wandering through the forest, looking around intently. He coughs slightly, then pulls up the collar of his shirt over his nose.]

CUT TO: [arks grabbing a baseball bat from the back of the truck and swinging it slowly a few times]

arks: Yes, perfect.

Kara [smiles, pokes arks on the side]: We’re leaving now. I want us to be in the monster's territory by the time it's dark.

Arks [nods]: Sure thing!

[Arks jumps into the drivers seat of the pickup and buckles up. He then inserts the key and starts the ignition. Sticks his head out of the window.]

Arks: Kara, ready when you are.

Kara: Gotcha. [to team behind] Come on guys, we're moving out!

I'm bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me.

Oh, I missed it. In the holding bin, it says that arks always calls Kara "ma'am" to her face.

Video Game Census. Please contribute.

Which lines should I change?

I'm bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me.

Just the last one, I think. "Ready when you are, ma'am"

Video Game Census. Please contribute.

I'll go ahead and fix that on the wiki copy.

I'm bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me.

New script/outline update!

FADE IN

EXT. LOS ANGELES – AFTERNOON

There is the appearance of breaking glass and numerous film and TV characters, both live action and animated, appear and begin attacking the populace.

EXT. TOKYO – EARLY MORNING

The glass-breaking effect reveals Kaiju and anime characters.

EXT. VANCOUVER – AFTERNOON

The city is under attack by Goa'uld, monsters from The Neverending Story, and stampeding Jumanji animals.

EXT. LONDON – NIGHT

The city is attacked by BBC and literature characters.

EXT. NEW YORK CITY – EVENING

The city is under attack from many characters, primarily villains from superhero comics.

FADE TO BLACK

“TV Tropes” appears on-screen, then fades.

EXT. GROSSE TÊTE – AFTERNOON

There is a haze over the swamp in the background. “Grosse-Tête, Louisiana, U.S.A.” and “Five Months Later” appear on-screen, then fade. The MAYOR, AIDE #1, and AIDE #2 wait in a parking lot next to a restuarant and a highway.

AIDE #1: When did Mitch say they were due to arrive, sir?

MAYOR: He couldn't pin down a time. These folks have a lot on their plate.

AIDE #2: They'll be worth the wait. They're the best at what they do.

AIDE #1: [taken aback] The best? Who else does it?

AIDE #2: Uh...

A motor home appears out of the haze with a motorcycle on the back, towing a pickup truck with some bicycles in the bed. The team gets out and "poses"—low shot for dramatic purposes—we're going for a low-key version of the Justice League Shot.

• MURKY—has her Naginata, face blank, leaning against the van, gives the general impression that she's not someone you want to mess with—use a Badass Arm-Fold
• KARA—non-flashy, shoulder-satchel with a first aid kit
• MATRIX—air-boxing and ready to go
• ARKS—cracking his knuckles and neck (with appropriate head-tilt)
• Cody—looking arrogantly confident and brandishing either a knife or his rifle
• Ironeye—Armed with...a legal pad in his hands (with some notes on the top of the paper, not that it is apparent in this shot)

AIDE #1: [muttering] Do you think they practice that?

MAYOR: [muttering] Hush, you. [aloud] Welcome to our fair town of Grosse Tête! Not as fair as it could be, obviously, or you wouldn't be here.

KARALORA and IRONEYE step forward.

KARALORA: [nods] Hello, sir. I'm Karalora, this is Ironeye.

MAYOR: [beat] You don't hear names like "Ironeye" around these parts. Y'all get that from Transformers?

KARALORA: Well, sir, Ironeye - and Karalora, for that matter, are codenames. We don't want our real names getting around because of what some fictites might be able to do with them.

MAYOR: Ah, alright, then. You know, most of you five look a little young for this.

KARALORA: Yes, I know we probably don't look like much, but don't worry, sir, we'll get this done, I assure you. Oh, and there are six of us.

MAYOR: Six? Huh? [recounts] Oh, there's the other one. [to Cody] Sorry, son, I guess I missed you the first time around.

CODY: Don't worry about it; it happens.

MAYOR: So, shall we get down to business?

IRONEYE: Yes, definitely. Let's see: [speaking rapidly] about a few weeks ago, a poisonous haze started creeping into town from the swamp at night but recedes somewhat during the day, many people have gotten sick and a few have died, a large scaly creature of some kind has been spotted after dark near a lake to the west...oh, yes, and [reads from the pad] "certain metals are tarnishing faster than usual, leading to depreciation in property values". Did I miss anything?

Two-three beats while the MAYOR mentally catches up.

MAYOR: Ah...no, I do believe that pretty well covers it.

IRONEYE: Excellent. I'd like to interview the people who saw the creature—[rapidly interjecting] if it's not too much trouble, of course.

MAYOR: [taken aback] Uh, well, sure, I don't see why not. I'll round 'em up for you.

KARALORA: Okay, everyone, while Ironeye talks to the locals, let's gear up for a Grue Hunt, Krem Quay variation.

INT. TIGER TRUCK STOP – AFTERNOON

A radio is clearly visible on the counter. Near the radio but out of focus is a WAITRESS who is drying glasses with a towel.

NEWSCASTER [from radio]:..the panda was unharmed. The individual believed to be responsible for the destruction in [X town] [X amount of time ago] is still at large. Once again, anyone seeing an individual matching [description] is advised to leave the area immediately and inform [someone]. If you have any information regarding this case, please contact [Pvt. Carrera] on band 15.

HIKARI (O.S.): Please, could you turn that off?

WAITRESS comes into focus with the radio leaving focus.

WAITRESS: Oh, alright, hun. [reaches over and switches off the radio]

Pan over to HIKARI sitting at a table eating pie. He quickly finishes. WAITRESS walks over to HIKARI with a tray on which the check sits. The WAITRESS takes HIKARI's plate and hands him the check.

WAITRESS: You finished that up right quick. I take it it was pretty good then?

HIKARI: Yes, thank you! [looks at the bill and takes out some money and hands it to the WAITRESS] There sure are a lot of people out there. Is there some kind of... trouble?

CUT TO:

The TEAM and the MAYOR are meeting outside, as seen through the diner's windows.

CUT TO:

WAITRESS: Oh, yeah, that's the mayor and a couple of his aides... You might say there's been trouble lately. Those other folks must be the ones the mayor's buddy in Baton Rouge told him about who solve problems like we've been having.

HIKARI: Hmm? Problems? What kind of problems?

WAITRESS: There's a poisonous mist that comes up at night. [looks distraught] Killed the tigers we kept around.

HIKARI: [anxious] A mist that can kill tigers!? [suddenly realizing] Wait, tigers?

WAITRESS: Oh, yeah, they're what put this town on the map. Don't know what we'll do without 'em, unless we can get a new batch from somewhere. We don't even want to try until we can get rid of that monster or whatever it is, though.

HIKARI: [more excited than before, stands right up] A monster!?

WAITRESS: That's what folks are sayin'. Some kinda fictite monster. [HIKARI begins to stop paying attention] If you're plannin' on stayin' in town, you want to pick yourself up a germ mask to wear outside at night.

HIKARI: I see. [looking down] Hmmhmmhmmhmm.... It's time to get started! [Bird Runs out of the diner, knocking over a chair]

WAITRESS: [calling out to HIKARI] Hey! What? [beat] Well, it takes all kinds.

EXT. GROSSE TÊTE – EVENING

KARA is in the pickup truck, grabbing a mass of bullet-proof vests and a handgun which she promptly sticks into the holster on her belt.

KARA: OK team, protective gear on. I don't want to spend all day tomorrow fixing you guys up, so please try to stay out of trouble.

CODY takes a vest from KARA with a smirk.

CODY: Yeah. Like that’s going to happen.

CUT TO:

HIKARI looks through his backpack, and then takes out a black t-shirt.

CUT TO:

The TEAM is spaced out, some leaning, some sitting, clustered around IRONEYE, who is standing

IRONEYE: So, putting together everything I gathered from Mitch's report and from the residents here, what we're dealing with here is a giant monster, probably reptilian, almost certainly semi-aquatic or amphibious. I have one report that says it was a giant walrus, two that indicate something more like a dragon, and one that calls it a brontosaurus, although we should bear in mind that this one came from a six-year-old. One person said it had two heads. A few reported a flying snake. Other details include: large pointy teeth, huge claws, feet like a chicken, hooves, noxious footprints, eyes made of fire, the face of an old woman, the ability to hypnotize, a tendency to sing as it attacks its prey, a preference for small children, acid spit, and having more than a passing resemblance to Madonna. Now some of these details may be exaggerations from the minds of people who were not in a position to make the best of observations at the time, but it's a start.

CUT TO:

HIKARI dashes into down the road to the swamp, grinning.

CUT TO:

The TEAM is equiping themselves.

MATRIX: [puts up a hand] Nyaaa~... What about air masks or something? Wouldn’t that stop the poison?

MURKY: [examining her blade] We don't have any. I checked.

IRONEYE: No, but we've got these [holds up several surgical masks], which should be able to keep the particles out of our lungs. Just in case though, I don’t want us to be hanging around for too long. Anything could happen, so adapt to the situation.

CODY: [loading bullets into rifle] You mean make it up as we go along. [clicks it back into finished position] So, like every other plan.

ARKS: Well, it works, doesn’t it?

CUT TO:

HIKARI walks down the road through the forest, looking around intently. He coughs slightly, then pulls up the collar of his shirt over his nose.

CUT TO:

ARKS grabs a baseball bat from the back of the truck and swinging it slowly a few times.

ARKS: Yes, perfect.

KARA: [smiles, pokes arks on the side] We’re leaving now. I want us to be in the monster's territory by the time it's dark.

ARKS: [nods] Sure thing!

ARKS jumps into the drivers seat of the pickup and buckles up. He then inserts the key and starts the ignition. He sticks his head out of the window.

ARKS: Ready when you are, ma'am.

KARA: Gotcha. [to team behind] Come on guys, we're moving out!

EXT. SWAMP ROAD NEAR GROSSE TÊTE - NIGHT

HIKARI walks down a road through the swamp. He hears the sound of a car, steps into the trees, and shuts off his flashlight. The TEAM's pickup drives by. MATRIX and MURKY are in the bed, ARKS is driving, IRONEYE is in the front passenger seat, KARALORA and CODY are in the back passenger seats; MATRIX is acting as lookout from his vantage point while MURKY is tending to her naginata. A conversation is going on in the cab; IRONEYE is looking at a map. All are wearing the masks.

IRONEYE: Okay, arks, just keep going down the road.

ARKS: Well it's a straight road. There's nothing else to do. There aren't even any turns.

IRONEYE: I'm just letting you know the map doesn't show any turns either.

ARKS: I think I got this, Ironeye.

KARALORA: Both of you, cool it.

A few beats.

CODY: So... Koopa Troopas.

ARKS: Can't we just jump on them?

KARALORA: With or without wings?

CODY: No, arks, we're not Mario. And Kara, without wings.

ARKS: Oh, right, the ones with wings are called Koopa Paratroopas.

KARALORA: Right. I knew that.

IRONEYE: Well, the good news is, we'd only have to manage to jump on one of them.

ARKS: Maybe we could climb a ladder for the first one.

KARALORA: Like we'd just have a ladder.

ARKS: The truck, then.

IRONEYE: Wait...are we assuming a two-dimensional battlefield?

KARALORA: Are they really that big? I mean, now that they're here. I always think of, you know, turtles. [Holds her hands about two feet apart]

CODY: Well, they're as big as regular Mario. I'd think that he's the size of a normal human.

ARKS: Maybe we should try to find him for reference.

IRONEYE: We might also have to consider strategies based on what color they are. For instance, a blue one—

MATRIX: [yelling] Arks, watch out! The road's blocked!

ARKS pays attention to what's in front when MATRIX yells, looks surprised, pushes on the brakes; sudden squeak and squelch from the sudden stop. The truck skids and just barely misses ramming into the log in the way.

KARALORA: [to MATRIX and MURKY] You two okay back there?

MATRIX: [somewhat shaken] Nya...Uh... yeah...

MURKY: Yeah.

The TEAM gets out of the truck and takes a look at the huge log in their way.

MURKY: Well, this is inconvenient.

MATRIX: This is gonna mean more time in the swamp, isn't it? Bleh... All that water. I'm sticking to the trees.

MATRIX shifts into skitty form.

CODY: Would it be worth trying to shift this, or should we just walk the rest of the way?

IRONEYE: I don't think we could move this, even using the truck. This road isn't solid enough.

MATRIX is on top of the log and shifts back to catboy form.

MATRIX: Hey guys! Nya! Look! There's a path. Right in line with the tree! The monster must have knocked it over and just walked right over it. So, the top of the tree is pointing that way [points in the direction of the top of the fallen tree]...that means the monster must be that way too. Let's go! [shifts back into skitty form and takes to the trees]

EXT. SWAMP NEAR GROSSE-TÊTE - LATER

The TEAM walks through the swamp down a path made by a large creature; skitty!MATRIX jumping through the treetops above. Everyone except MATRIX carries a flashlight—CODY carries a large maglite; MURKY and IRONEYE are also wearing headlamps.

CODY: How much farther do we have to walk through all this mud?

KARALORA: Until we find the monster—or something that looks like its lair, so we can wait for it.

ARKS: What? We've only been going half a mile. A mile at most.

CODY: Shut up, arks.

IRONEYE: Hey Matrix, how's it going up there?

SKITTY!MATRIX: [meows inquisitively]

KARALORA: Do you see anything yet?

SKITTY!MATRIX: [meows negatively]

CUT TO:

HIKARI walks through the swamp. He comes up to the TEAM's truck, looks around for a bit, then notices the path through the trees.

CUT TO:

The TEAM is still walking through the swamp. There is a small stream in front of them.

CODY: It can't be much longer, can it?

SKITTY!MATRIX: [meows]

CODY: What was that, Matrix?

CUT TO:

SKITTY!MATRIX sniffs the air

CUT TO:

Shot from just behind SKITTY!MATRIX, aimed toward the rest of the team on the ground watching him as he continues to sniff.

IRONEYE: We must be getting pretty—

CUT TO:

Three-quarters right rear shot of the team as the HYDRA crashes out of the trees ahead of them to their left, roaring. One head snaps at MATRIX, who jumps out of harm's way.

KARALORA: Son of a bitch!

The TEAM scatters. MURKY and ARKS run in the general direction of the HYDRA. CODY goes to the side. IRONEYE and KARALORA fall back.

KARALORA: Keep moving! Don't present a stationary target! Watch out for the mist! Murky, concentrate on bladework! Cody, rear assault!

CODY: [moving around toward the HYDRA's back end] I always get the butt end of the monster!

MURKY is weaving through the heads trying to get to the body. She uses her naginata to alternately deflect and attack hydra heads.

ARKS has unsheathed his bat and is swinging at any head that gets close to him. He lands a hit on a couple of heads, then manages to shove the bat into the mouth of the third. As he is gloating, another head comes up behind him and bites him fiercely around the middle, lifting him into the air.

ARKS: [deadpan] Oh, goddammit! [starts poking the hydra in the eye]

MATRIX jumps on top of the HYDRA's back. He uses Assist and calls up Water Gun from MURKY, shooting a small stream of water from his mouth at the hydra, which is not very effective. After hissing in anger, he switches forms.

MATRIX: Damnit! Why couldn't I have gotten Overheat or something!? [deftly jumps on a HYDRA head and starts clawing at its eyes]

The HYDRA head that MATRIX is on flails around wildly as MATRIX claws at its eyes. Matrix jumps off the HYDRA's head; the camera focuses on a scratched-up eye and the blood around it starts to recede. The head emits a low growl.

CUT TO:

HIKARI is running down the path. The HYDRA roars in the background. He pauses to listen, then runs in its direction.

CUT TO:

KARALORA and IRONEYE. IRONEYE is in deep concentration. KARALORA is coaching him.

KARALORA: It's a total bastard, isn't it? It's hurting your friends. It killed the tigers in the town and—arks, on your right!—and it's making kids sick. It's just asking for a frozen head or five, isn't it?

IRONEYE: [growling] Got it! [Thrusts his hand out toward the HYDRA.]

The HYDRA's nearest head develops a coating of frost, while behind IRONEYE, the air wavers with heat and a few plants droop slightly.

KARALORA: That's it! Destroy it! Kill it! Rip it apart!

With a furious roar, IRONEYE repeats the gesture and the head freezes solid. ARKS rushes up ahead and whacks it a few times with the bat, shattering it.

ARKS: Piece of cake.

KARALORA: Nice hit. Ironeye, stay mad. If we can keep this up—

The flesh at the stump of neck begins to twitch, and two more heads begin to sprout up.

ARKS: What the fuck is this!?

The heads finish forming, and roar at ARKS. MURKY throws up an arm and a small burst of water flies at the HYDRA from the nearby stream.

KARALORA: Shit, it's a hydra! All right, everyone, re—

HIKARI (O.S.): Wind vector flight boosters, ENGAGE!

HIKARI bursts onto the scene, flying towards the hydra as though he was shot out of a cannon.

HIKARI: Prepare, foul beast!

CODY, surprised by HIKARI's arrival, is smacked by the HYDRA's tail and is knocked into a tree.

HIKARI slashes at the HYDRA with Razor Wind, slicing off a few heads. In its flailing, it knocks over a small tree, which falls next to Matrix. He is scratched by one of its branches. HIKARI slices off more heads.

HIKARI: In the name of the Light, thou shalt be defeated. Run away now, or I shall be forced to—

KARALORA: Somebody, STOP HIM! NOW!

MATRIX (O.S.): [faintly] OOOOOW! SHIT! OW! OW! OW! agh... help... ow..

MURKY whacks Hikari in the face with the blunt end of her naginata, and ARKS glomps him while he is stunned.

ARKS: Whoa boy. Hold on there. That's not a good idea.

HIKARI: H- huh? But I—

The HYDRA's remaining heads finish regrowing. CODY pulls himself to his feet, wincing—he's broken some ribs.

ARKS: Listen. Stay here, don't do ANYTHING. All right? Just let us handle this. [He rushes to rejoin the combat, and is promptly attacked by several heads.]

HIKARI: Oh. Uh... hmm... [He suddenly gets a determined look on his face.]

MATRIX (O.S.): [faintly] Guys! Ooooowww! I got hit by a treeeee! Guys? Kara? nnnh..

KARALORA: Okay, okay, okay. What do we—Cody, distract it from behind!—Ahh... Murky, behind you! Umm... Fire! Fire! Right! Fire! Ironeye, get us fire! We need it fast! That hydra is the most horrific creature to ever live! All it does is kill. It just wants to kill everything! It's evil, Ironeye! Evil! It must be eliminated! Burned to ashes! Ironeye! Now! Give us fire, give us fire!

Throughout, the wind has been steadily increasing in force. HIKARI is shown, concentrting to keep the wind blowing.'

HIKARI: Yes... it shall be burned... to ashes! Please! Eveyone... stand back!

HIKARI shouts a battle cry and charges forward, running beneath the hydra. Everyone looks. A light begins to emanate from him, slowly expanding into a ball of light that obliterates the hydra. DEMON!HIKARI looks around, then, satisfied, approaches the TEAM.

DEMON!HIKARI: Where do you stand?

CODY: What?

DEMON!HIKARI: I said "Where do you stand?" Can we work together or shall I have to kill you? [beat] Well, I'll let you live. For now. [retreats]

HIKARI [suddenly shaky on his feet]: So... not bad, eh?

FADE OUT

EXT. SWAMP NEAR GROSSE TÊTE - LATER

KARALORA is healing CODY

MATRIX: Nyaa! I need healing too, Kara! See? [shows the minor cut on his arm that isn't even bleeding]

KARALORA looks at MATRIX like ಠ_ಠ

MATRIX looks down in shame

CUT TO:

HIKARI is sitting with his back against a tree stump. MURKY and ARKS are standing guard near him.

HIKARI: Hey, uh, maybe you could let me go? Really, it's okay. I'll be good!

ARKS: Sorry, bud, but until Kara says so, you're staying right here.

MURKY: No talking.

KARALORA: [finished healing CODY, walks over to where HIKARI is] Well, now what are we going to do with you?

HIKARI [sincerely]: Isn't it obvious? Let me join your team, of course!

CUT TO:

The TEAM is in a huddle near the edge of the destruction caused by the Wind of Light. HIKARI is waiting just outside of the huddle.

KARA: We can't let this guy be part of the team.

HIKARI (O.S.): What? But why!?

CODY: But we can't let him roam free out here. Who knows what he might do?

KARA: You've got a point there.

MATRIX: Why can't we take him along? His power's cool.

KARA: We don't know if he can control it. He's a hazard.

ARKS: Is he a fictite?

HIKARI (O.S.): Of course not!

MURKY: Does it matter?

ARKS: Well it might change how we deal with him.

HIKARI (O.S.): I'm not a fictite!

IRONEYE: So can anyone think of a fictional character that fits his description?

Short pause while the various members think.

CODY: I'm drawing a blank.

HIKARI (O.S.): Me too!

MATRIX: Me too. See? He's fine.

KARA: Well, let's keep in mind the possibility that he may be fictional, but assume for now that he's human.

IRONEYE: I'd like to study his abilities a bit under controlled conditions—it might provide valuable information.

MATRIX: Plus can you imagine what I could do with wind powers?

CODY: Use the wrong power more often?

KARA: I guess our best course of action is to take him with us. At least then we can keep an eye on him.

CODY: We'd have to restrain him of course. What kind of restraints to we have back in the RV? Rope, handcuffs, anything like that?

Everyone turns to look at IRONEYE.

IRONEYE: What are you looking at me for?

ARKS: Considering his powers, we might have to keep him in a box. Probably one made of steel, or lead. Something like that.

MATRIX: You wouldn't be able to find a lead box large enough to fit a person inside!

IRONEYE: Well, if we find an abandoned foundry, I could heat up some sheet metal and we could create a box ourselves. And then we could—

KARA: I don't think that's practical.

ARKS and IRONEYE look dejected.

MURKY: This is too much effort.

CUT TO:

HIKARI is watching the huddle.

MURKY: Let's just kill him.

HIKARI: Wait, what!?

CUT TO:

The team is still huddled.

KARA: No. We aren't murderers.

MURKY: With that ability of his, he could level cities. Probably already has.

CUT TO:

HIKARI cringes in the middle of saying something.

MURKY: It's better this way.

CUT TO:

The TEAM is still huddling.

IRONEYE: We're keeping him alive—I can't learn anything from him if he's dead. Besides, I can always kill him later.

CODY: Ironeye has a point: we don't know anything about him. Is he good or evil, and if he's good, is his method of doing good practical for this world?

HIKARI (O.S.): I- I'm good! I know I'm good.

CODY: If it's not, then we can kill him.

KARA: We are not killing him!

ARKS: We could just incapacitate him, you know. A quick hit to the back of the head, leave him in the middle of nowhere.

MURKY: Maybe then the environment will kill him.

HIKARI (O.S.) Why does this conversation keep on returning to my death?

Cody: [to Hikari] Will you please shut up? This doesn't concern you.

HIKARI (O.S.): How does this not concern me!?

The camera shifts to focusing on HIKARI. He turns to look behind him (at the camera/back where the hydra was) and gets a worried look on his face.

MATRIX: Of course it concerns him! You're talking about his death!

HIKARI: [a little nervous] Uhh, excuse me...

CODY: No it doesn't. He doesn't have any say in what we choose.

HIKARI: [more nervous] Um, guys?

ARKS: But, I mean. What we do choose does have a large effect on what happens to him.

IRONEYE: [absentmindedly] Well, if you think about the meaning of the word "concern"...

HIKARI: [agitated] Guys?

KARA: Must every conversation derail into semantics? Let's get back on topic.

HIKARI [yelling] Guys!

KARA: [exasperated] What?

HIKARI: [pointing] I think that monster thing is still alive....

IRONEYE: We told you before, it's called a hydra.

HIKARI: Okay, fine! The hydra is still alive!

MATRIX: Really? [looks] Guys! It is!

---

Kara orders Hikari not to use his powers. Ironeye stands next to him to make sure he behaves. Ironeye heats up Murky's naginata blade so they can cauterize the wounds—Hikari comments on how cold it's getting, to which Ironeye responds with a humorless quip (he's trying to feel hate, after all) about the heat having to come from somewhere.

After the hydra's last (invincible) head is cut off, arks goes to retrieve it and gets himself bitten again.

ARKS: You'd think it'd have learned by now.

Scene 7: The Ending of the Beginning

The light of dawn is seen on the horizon. Hikari is filling in a shallow hole (with the hydra head in it) in the middle of an area with no plants (cut out by the Wind of Light). Ironeye is behind him, holding a filled vial (it's hydra blood) with some tongs and washing it in the swamp. As Ironeye finishes and walks by, putting the vial in a small padded case pulled from his back pocket, Hikari grumbles about having to do all the work. Ironeye makes a smart-ass remark about how Hikari said he wanted to help, but then takes the shovel from Hikari to finish up. Murky and arks carry over a large rock and put it over the filled hole. Kara walks over and tells Hikari that he's welcome to come along with them if he likes, under the condition that he only uses his powers when explicitly ordered to do so (with [placeholder] chiming in to say that Matrix can't give such an order). As the team walks back to town, fade to black.

Scene 8: End Credits

Nothing special here.

Scene 9: The Stinger

A quick shot of the shadows of the Wicked Witch's minions falling on the rock—iconic silhouette.

---

Comments, as always, are appreciated.

edited 15th Feb '10 12:40:35 PM by Ironeye

I'm bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me.

We need to add a line to indicate the "halfway" limitation of Kara's power. She can say to Cody something like "Okay, that should get you back on your feet for today but I don't want you straining yourself."

Also, you were coming down so hard on me last night for my inconsistent formatting...