Stuck Writing Witty One-Liners for Comic Relief Character

Before I start describing what I need help with, I feel the need to pre-emptively apologize to any Mexicans or Christians who may feel offended by the design of the character I am about to describe. I tend to take Refuge in Audacity (...and a lot of stuff under Absurdity Ascendant seems to apply to my work now that I look, really) with my comic relief because it simply gets me more laughs than if I don't, but this character in particular is likely not quite at the level of offensiveness where it ceases to be offensive.

In my work, there's a comic relief character who appears near the end, where the story justifies short appearances of the main characters to stories in my head that I never got around to writing. Among them is this character:

This character is to only appear for one scene, but I've run out of ideas for his dialogue. He only has once scene, but he was written for a video game plot. As such, because he's a Mini-Boss, and my game has dialogue during fights, both because such dialogue can be effective for giving characterization, and because I can make jokes with that dialogue. This character is obviously going to be cracking bad jokes.

But, for this, I need witty one-liners that twist religious references to refer to what he's going to do with his gun and motorcycle. At the moment, the only ones I could think of are "I will now turn you into wine." and "Let there be light... shining through the new holes in your skull!", but that's obviously not enough to fill time (not to mention, that second one kinda sucks). Does anyone have any suggestions?

Actually, I like his second line better than his first one.

I came up with "Thou shalt not kill... that's my job, bitch!" off the top of my head, but it's admittedly not great. Will work on coming up with better ones and get back to you later.

To be honest, I find both his original lines more amusing then that (mainly because of how much This Is for Emphasis, Bitch! has become a Discredited Trope).

Anyway, as a Christian (though not a Mexican) I don't find him super-offensive, though like a lot of things it would depend on execution.

"You wanna take a bite out of me?"

...I feel as if I should get the joke, but I don't.

Its a reference to that whole, flesh is bread thing Jesus had going for him.

Ah.