Too old to achieve?

Does anyone else ever get the feeling that if you haven't done anything by a certain age, people just give up on you? Like, if you're not a child prodigy, or you're not lucky enough to have access to the things you want to learn, you must be behind?

I realize this point of view is completely irrational, since there are late bloomers and most artists/other people do their best work when they're older. And it's not like I did absolutely nothing during my childhood and teenage years—that's usually when you're just laying the foundation for what you want to do later.

But while I was working on something (that something was music, this might be relevant to this discussion, maybe), I thought about some things people had either said to me, or to someone else (and I overheard it). They'd say, "If you haven't done anything by now, you're not going to do anything, so helping you would be a waste of time," or "If you haven't found any talent by now, you probably didn't have any to begin with." Or words to that effect. Maybe this could spin off into a discussion of the talent myth?

What I usually do more often to snap myself out of it is to remind myself that I'm either comparing myself to people who are older (and thus had more time to achieve things) or comparing myself to people who had access to resources I didn't (until a certain time). Of course, comparing yourself to other people is never a good thing.

tl;dr version: this is just basically me feeling unaccomplished at age 22, and wondering if anyone else occasionally feels the same way.

Welcome to my world. We have cookies!

edited 13th Jan '12 9:50:21 PM by MajorTom

Yeah, sometimes it's hard for me not to look back and wish I'd taken advantage of more of the opportunities that were offered to me. I'd wager that everyone feels that way sometimes, to be honest.

I feel like that all the time really.

People have suggested I do all sorts of things, a former Chess champion (when I was like 10) suggested I "keep playing chess" and improved and to "keep entering tournaments"

I never have really done either in my life. On a similar note with both Bassoon and Piano I really feel like I could be better, it's not that my level is satisfactory, it's just not as good as it could have been.

Alright, let me put this out for you guys. My mum is now a successful hypnotherapist who has her own business. She started it in her 50's; its been going strong for years. And she managed it after being made redundant from the company she worked at; she'd been in it since leaving university.

To the tweenagers out there who are despairing because they haven't achieved social, financial and spiritual nirvana yet, snap out of it.

"You must set your targets low, so you can achieve them easily."

Many attempts at achievement when younger were impossible due to lack of resources not accessible to the younger.

Most of the people whose exploits I admire most were at their peak in their early '20s. It was a different world then, though, and there was a big-arse war on.

Crap, this thread is a window and into my own insecurities.

I squandered so many opportunities to improve myself when I was younger, I was a late boomer in pretty much everything. People give you so encouragement when your younger to lean and grow and be successful in your goals, and if you don't show interest then they loss interest in you.

edited 15th Jan '12 3:08:51 PM by joeyjojo

I used to be rather worried about this but fuck that noise.

What bobby said. I'm just old enough to realize I'm not that old, and have lots of time to figure this out. Everyone I know who is secure and happy with their station in life is over 50; why should I be terribly concerned with not being so?

I personally believe that as long as you're still physically and mentally capable of learning or achieving something, you're never too old to do so.

But drunk you're over 30, by the standards of the internet that's old enough to claim the pension

The overwhelming majority of people don't achieve anything that changes the world significantly. Statistically, you're probably in that majority. In short, get fucking used to it.

@Post 13: Okay, where do I file? I wouldn't mind drawing a pension.

@Post 14: True words. I'd just rather craft a nice comfortable position to live in. Changing the world is a dicey proposition and anyway, if I ran the zoo it'd still be a zoo.

Maybe people don't seem to change the world significantly, but I'm of the mind that every action that you do affects every other person on earth, maybe in the tiniest of ways and maybe in the biggest way of all, whether or not you even know it. Hell, your mere existence could have even completely changed the life of a total stranger.

As for people who say you're too old to achieve, here's what I have to say about that:

As a musician I can definitely relate to this. I look at all the child prodigies out there, or the professionals who've been practicing 8 hours a day for the last 20 years and I know that I haven't worked nearly as much in comparison. Not to mention all the competition. Do you know, for example, that in San Francisco alone, the last time an orchestra spot opened up for a string player was around 20 years ago? Think of all the professionals who want to play, and how many will apply for that single spot the next time something opens up.

But here's the thing, determination can get you through the game. Yes I haven't practiced as much as other professionals, but it's not too late for me to do anything about it. Most people give up when trying to get an orchestra gig, but some people don't. I know of a trumpet player that waited 10 years to get into an orchestra, all the while auditioning for orchestras that whole time. Can you imagine that? Applying for a job over and over again for 10 years, paying to travel for all the "interviews" and still not finding success? Most people would give up by then - I would probably give up by then.

I'm the same age as you. You and I have years ahead of us to do the things we want to do. If we decide that we're failures simply because we haven't achieved greatness by the age of 25, then we've given up and will never achieve such. You're never too old to do what you want to do (unless, it starts to become a physical impossibility), and there is always a way to do something if you work at it long enough. There's all the time in the world.