She smiled, blood spreading down the front of her chest. At last she was finally happy.
It's easy, mmkay?
This was it. His life was over. Yet he doubted death would come any time soon.
At first I didn't realize I needed all this stuff...
The Puzzler
How Fast Eddie got a job flipping pancakes. 
He glanced up from the spot on the floor where he had awoken. He was not alone.
She knew there was no one behind her. So why did she feel a hand grasp her shoulder?
He let out a heartbroken sob as he read the letter he had received just that morning.
Mate Griffon To Mare
The Odd Lad
Nobody told him his childhood hometown was Death.
Life's Gonna Suck When You Grow Up... But Is It That Great Now?... Also I'm Skylark2 now.
"Well, that's certainly unusal." He gave a moan as he looked up.
Christmas Sheep
This one was on Writing Excuses a while back, iirc:
Dave knew his mouth was going to get him killed someday. (paraphrased, I forgot the exact wording. Sounded interesting enough though.)
Still Sheepin'
Fuzzy Orange Doomsayer
He singed his eyebrows, ruined his shirt, and went through half a box of band-aids, but by the sixth attempt, he'd almost gotten it to work.
edited 5th Aug '11 12:04:48 AM by feotakahari
That's Feo . . . He's a disgusting, mysoginistic, paedophilic asshat who moonlights as a shitty writer—Something Awful
He grimaced in pain as she drove her spear deeper into his chest, pinning him against the wall.
Thou errant flap-dragon!
"So, why are you putting Barney stickers on your dick?"
edited 5th Aug '11 2:42:55 PM by snowfoxofdeath
Warm hugs and morally questionable advice given here. Prosey Bitchfest
*hrrrrrk*
These are... really bizarre and morbid... I think I'll try a few. I'll post when I'm done.
I'm sorry, you're a nice guy and all, but we're just not OS-compatible.
Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right, here I am...
Author in waiting
And then the skull rolled across the river.
I am a nobody. Nobody is perfect. Therefore, I am perfect.
Thou errant flap-dragon!
Another day, another fifty potatoes wasted firing my makeshift bazooka at the middle school kids across the street.
Warm hugs and morally questionable advice given here. Prosey Bitchfest
Why are all of these so bizarre, anyway?
I changed accounts.
![[up]](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/smiles/arrow_up.png "[up]"){kind=icon}
Because we wouldn't have it any other way. 
Brothers fight and die on opposite sides of a war...
I am now known as Flyboy.
Christmas Sheep
It was a day just like any other. If only every other day wasn't so damn crazy.
Still Sheepin'
Chronically Happy
As per usual, I was right. So, as per usual, death was imminent.
*hrrrrrk*
I lost interest in my own scene >__>
He glanced up from the spot on the floor where he had awoken. He was not alone.
Cogito Gratia Cogitan
Ever had an out-of-body experience? I have. Standing around, minding my own business, and suddenly I'm ripped out the back of my own head, but let me tell you, if you think that's the part that caught me by surprise, it's just because I haven't told you about the out-of-planet experience that came with it. The Earth never looks so beautiful as it does when it's being wisked away from you before your very eyes... except my eyes were still on it, weren't they?
Do with it what you will. Or don't, whatever.
Ponders too much; thinks too little. Currently goes by Knowlessman.
It could have been worse. At least I remembered to take my daily dose of cyanide.*
Warm hugs and morally questionable advice given here. Prosey Bitchfest