What on earth are you trying to sell me, adserver?

Adserver, I do not need a new John Deere tractor.

How else are you supposed to move Dusty around?

Well she weighs like 8 pounds so I was thinking... carry her.

What, with your hands? How barbaric.

A private jet service, Ad Bot? I don't need reminders of how broke I am. Or the temptation of Panda Express, for that matter.

• New toilets. That's one of the few things our house doesn't need, adbot.
• Denver Preschool Program, and the ad is in Spanish! At least the location is right.
• Xerox color multifunction printer. Adbot, my dude, I print so seldom that it's actually cheaper for me to go to the library and pay 10c a page.

"Blaming your chronic back pain on binge watching?"

I don't have chronic back pain, and I don't binge watch stuff often. (The ad is for an ankylosing spondilitis symptom quiz. To be fair, my mom has it, but I'm 95% sure I don't.)

Also, candy (which is welcome) and a State Farm agent in a town I don't live in.

Top things to see in cities I'll probably never get to go to.

Also the cell phone service I already have.

Adbot, stop sending me ads for things in Orlando. I don't live there.

Online dating. No no no no no no no. With a side of no.

Sorry, I don't need a Subaru car or places to see in London or Prague.

A 3 bedroom, 3 bathroom house for $438,000. Because Denver.

Already have pet insurance, but thank you.

I don't need a new car, I don't want to sell plasma, and I already have a Crunchyroll subscription.

Office Max, Adbot? Surely you can be more creative than that.

Fun fact: I once saw a Korean ad on this website. And no, it wasn't North Korean propaganda (I'd assume it was a South Korean ad, since North Korea rarely allows foreign works into their country). I think it was an ad for a vacation getaway or something.

Is anyone else getting ads for Valley Vet.com?

Meiji Japanese snacks and Jelly Belly jelly beans. Dammit, adbot, I'm trying to eat healthy! At least it's more interesting than the usual car and credit card ads.

Now it's pizza and Skittles. Plz stop, adbot!

Babies R Us registry. HA HA HA—No

Adserver just showed me a video of Lil BUB purring and now wants to sell me chocolate.

You win, adserver.

Clothing. Which I can't afford. :(

Adserver, I do not want to buy crocs. I also do not need new IT solutions for my business.

I have no need for an American Express credit card, Adserver.

A cat wheel (think like a hamster wheel, but cat-sized.) I looked at this on another website because I thought it was funny, and now I'm getting ads for it. Sorry, adbot. I don't actually have a cat.