ITT: We're in a generic first person shooter online match

[notice a grenade just under me]

betterthanstrawberry: WWWWW WWW WWAAAAAAAAASSSS SSSSSSSDDDDDDD DWAWWWSSSSDDD

edited 14th Mar '11 7:58:34 AM by betterthanstrawberry

Notices Striker's corpse by the sniping spot I'd set up

Ha!

Attempts to walk back onto own sniping spot and explodes the remaining mines

GAAAHHH.

Takes aim at another player.
Spins uncontrollably while looking all the way up.
Sounds of a mouse hitting a nearby wall are broadcast to the server.

Goddamnit! I hate it when this happens!

... well, I guess I'll have to play with my keyboard only.

Takes aim at the same player as above. Target identified as a bot.
Shoots weapon.
HEAD SHOT!

Uh... what difficulty are the bots set to?

edited 14th Mar '11 9:02:38 AM by StrikerX3

I dunno man, they seem pretty easy to me. Watch this;

Shoots grenade launcher. Watches bot scurry after the grenade and stare at the nade coming towards it.

Ha. Awesome.

Watches bot pull out melee weapon and smack grenade towards him.

HEY! What? That's not a thing!

edited 14th Mar '11 9:08:28 AM by mmysqueeant

(sneaks up on mmysqueeant)

(thinking) How about I fuck with their heads first?

You shouldn't have done that...

Knifes zombie and runs away.

ITS NINJA TIME!!!!!!!!

Knifes fringeman in an ironic manner and keeps running.

(my avatar suddenly has the same face as Ben)

Holy crap, I didn't mean it!

-slits Awesome Zombie's throat with a very sharp knife-

-Comes into the spectator area-

(the avatar's face is now blank, and then everything goes back to normal)

Oh Jesus, is that why people don't use thi-

(reads the item's description) You shouldn't have done that.

How did I miss that?

edited 14th Mar '11 5:15:38 PM by AwesomeZombie22

-entrenches himself inside a machine gun bunker-

MAP VOTE

• Amazonian wetlands
• Antarctic storm
• Sky fortress
• Subway

I vote for Sky fortress.

Yeah, I'm voting for sky fortress too. I love seeing those bots run off the edge.

Arctic Storm

Subway! Watching bots falling off the edge isn't as fun as seeing bots being run over by trains! Also, I love how the ragdoll physics in this game fails so much; train collisions usually leave dead bodies with very long necks and limbs.

Falls off the top of a building and dies from falling damage. Actually, dies mid-air. The head gets stuck in the wall and the neck stretches all the way down the three-story building.

Speaking of physics...

edited 14th Mar '11 7:54:09 PM by StrikerX3

FUCK YOU GUYS I'M GONNA OWN ALL OF YOU YOU DON'T STAND A FUCKING CH- OH MY FUCKING GOD YOU DID NOT JUST KILL MY FUCKING GUY WHEN I RESPAWN I WILLTGRFRTEDTFGRFWERSAFDAESRFEDCAWEDFSX-

-map changes to sky fortress-

Ooh, this map has plasma rifles.

-picks up rifle and begins to overcharge it-

That powering up sound is so satisfying.

Hey, don't laugh at my armor! It's really powerful, I swear!

How do you like my coustom Rouge model?

{Shoots Miru between the eyes regardless of what team he's on}

Target spotted! Aim and fire!

Headshots Abstract with a sniper rifle while he was typing.

-jumping around everywhere, pikcs up 3 items; Mega Health, Rocet Luancehr and Quad Damage in order to commence gibbing, which he does so-

(what? only multiplayer FPS I play is Quake Live!)

Alright, I've laid out the Ceefours, so my noob frag-proof strategy is a go.

Wait, I carpeted the area right under my feet...